Wrong Number
by mattnme04
Summary: When a caller gets a wrong number and accidentally calls Gabriella, how will each respond to the situation? Will the wrong number turn out to be the right number?
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.

CHAPTER 1

"How odd, having to work a split one day, and then expecting you back in at 6 am," Sharon was saying to me as we clocked out.

"Yes, but that's the wonderful part about being a nurse," I quipped back. Pushing my unruly brown curls out of my eyes, I squinted out into the darkness. "It doesn't look like the security guy is even out there."

"Don't be so uptight, Gabriella," Sharon scolded. "You'd think you were the one in your fifties and I was in my twenties." She started off across the parking lot, then stopped short and let out a piercing scream.

"What? What is it?" I asked, running up to her, but she'd already collapsed in a fit of giggles.

"Gotcha," she said, a twinkle in her eye. "Now go, get some rest."

"Sometimes I think you were sent here to torture me," I mumbled, turning towards my car and walking briskly.

"Honey, you could use a stiff drink," she called after me with a laugh. "Or just something stiff. Or both."

I put my fingers in my ears and singsonged "La la la la la" so I couldn't hear the rest of what she had to say. She sounded so much like my friends it was almost as if she'd been speaking with them… wait, that's right, she had. She'd come along on girls night a couple weeks before, getting nice and toasty along with my three best… well, okay, only friends. I was designated driver, of course. What did they know, anyhow? Who were they to judge whether or not I needed to loosen up, and be the "old" me again? I wasn't a teenager anymore, thank you very much, and doing just fine all by myself. My life didn't need anything to stir it up… but that's just what happened.

I can remember exactly when and how it started… I was in the middle of a blissful slumber, my dreams taking me to far away lands. The breeze was tousling my hair as I gazed up at the warm summer sun. Not a cloud in the sky, not another soul around… just that damn annoying phone ringing. Where was that coming from?

I rolled over and looked at the clock, groaning out loud as I saw the glaring red 2:35 staring at me. The phone had continued to ring, over and over, as if the person on the other end didn't grasp the concept of time, or voice mail for that matter. Angrily, I picked up the receiver and said "Who the hell is this and what do you want?"

"I'm sorry I woke you," a heavenly male voice with the most incredible timbre was saying, "but I'm looking for John."

"John? There's no John here," I snapped.

"This is 937-555-1820, right?" he asked.

"Yes, but there's no John here. And if you were going to prank me, you could have come up with something better than that."

"Pardon?"

"Why not ask for Mr. Pedaso? You know, first name Stu," I suggested, rubbing sleep from my eyes. Why was I even talking to this person? Why not hang up and try to get some rest?

"I'm not pranking you, and I don't know a Stu Ped…" he stopped and laughed. "That was good, that was very good."

"Thank you," I mumbled, flopping down on my back, staring up at the ceiling. "But there's no John here, really."

"This was the number he gave me, I swear," the man on the other line said.

"He gave you a wrong number." With that, I put the receiver back in its cradle. I stared at it for a moment, wondering if perhaps I recognized this person's voice from somewhere. What if he was in some kind of trouble? What if it was a true emergency?

The phone rang again. Why was he calling me again?

I knew it couldn't possibly be anyone else, at least no one who actually knew me. I glared angrily at the phone, willing it to stop, but knowing that it wouldn't, I picked it up again.

"Look, I…"

"Honest, I'm not pranking you, and I just wanted to tell you I'm very sorry." He sounded so sincere to me (or was it just that soothing tone?) that I couldn't yell the obscenities that had popped into my brain.

"Ok, so you're sorry. And this isn't a prank call. Could you have at least waited until a decent hour to call back and apologize?" I asked. Lying back into my pillows, I watched the moonlight cast an eerie shadow down the wall as I heard him breathe in sharply.

"Perhaps because I've had a bit much to drink, and was afraid that I would forget at a decent hour," he replied. I felt myself fighting back a grin that was threatening just beneath the surface.

"Ok, apology accepted. My alarm goes off in two hours,"

"Wonderful! So you have time to chat," he interrupted me.

"You don't even know who I am, I don't know who you are, why would I want to chat with you?" I asked, unable to hide my amusement.

"Well… I know you're not John," he said, and I stifled a giggle. "So what is your name?"

"Not telling," I said, almost childlike. "Who are you?"

"Well that's an odd name… and a lame joke to go along with it. 'Ello Not Telling, nice to make your acquaintance."

"Oh, that was bad," I laughed. "And you are?"

"I'm not John," he started.

"You can't be Not John, I'm Not John," I cut him off, giggling in spite of myself. 'It's the lack of sleep, Gabriella. That's what it is.'

"You can't be Not John because you're Not Telling."

"Ok, fine, I'll be Not Telling, and you can be Not John."

"Right," that soothing voice crooned to me, almost like an aphrodisiac. "I'm Not John. Well, except I know Johns, lots of them, some of them it's their last name, kinda… but I'm not that John."

"What?" I asked, confused yet school girlishly giggling.

"I'm not that John," he started to explain. "And, ok not technically a John, or that kind of john either, or the other, but…what? Why are you laughing?" I was wiping a tear from my eye that had formed while I was stifling my laughter, and only managed another half attempt of asking him what in the world he was saying in his drunken state. "Ok, fine we'll just stick to the original… you're Not Telling, and I'm Not John. Except I am, in this conversation…"

"Just not that John," I repeated. "And not really a John at all. Is it your middle name?"

"Nope," he replied.

"Ok, I think I've got it," I said.

"And now you know more about me than I do you, soooooooo, so, yeah, right, um…what was I saying? Not Telling and Not John, right… are you alright there?"

"I dunno, I'm talking to a stranger in the middle of the night who's probably some freakish stalker and…"

"And what?" he asked, as if what we were doing was completely normal.

"And laughing more than I have in ages," I admitted, absentmindedly putting a hand on my cheek, as if feeling a smile was foreign.

"Right, right… I'm good for a laugh, so I've been told." His voice trailed off a bit, and I wondered if that was meant to be funny. He almost sounded sad… "Look, I'm sorry, I shouldn't be bothering you like this, you're right. It's the middle of the night, and the wrong number, like you said."

"Wait… John?"

"Not John," he corrected me, then laughed softly to himself. "I'll have to remember that one."

"Christine," I said suddenly, not realizing I'd blurted out my middle name until it had left my lips. "And you don't have to go, really."

"Christine…that's beautiful," he breathed, and I could hear him take another drink.

"But not really Christine, and the joke can only go that far because I don't think anything else is called Christine… except that car, and I'm not a car. It's my middle name."

"Your middle name… how nice, now I know something about you." I heard him take another drink, but the laughter was gone from his voice. "Again, I apologize for waking you. Goodnight Not Telling." I smiled wistfully.

"Good night, Not John." After I heard the tell-tale click on the other end of the line, I hung up.

Damn that man on the other end of my phone, I wasn't able to get back to sleep. I searched the caller id, but found that the originating number had been blocked, so I couldn't call him back. Not that I would. Ever. Really, I swear, I wouldn't have. But it didn't help my next day at work, attempting to function at a high level on about two hours of sleep.

"Gabriella, are you in there?" Sharon was asking. I smiled softly and nodded, concentrating on a medication order as if I couldn't understand what was written. "I know, coming in here so early after getting off at midnight… sucks doesn't it?"

"Mmm hmm," was my only response. I only had an hour to go on my shift, then I planned on taking a nap before the girls showed up for our weekly outing. I hadn't told Sharon about my late night phone call, and hadn't quite decided if I wanted to tell the girls or not. It almost seemed like a betrayal of sorts if I told anyone, and I didn't even know who he was. I was looking forward to sleep, and yet hoping it would be interrupted by him again, even if it was just for me to ask what I'd said that had upset him.

"And your head certainly isn't a million miles away, is it?" It was more of an observation than a question that Sharon was giving.

"Not at all, and I can't read Doc's writing," I quickly changed the subject. Barely glancing down at the paper, she looked up at me and rattled off the medication order. "I'm just tired, really."

"Oh, speaking of tired, Robert wants us to have a night in this evening, so I won't be able to go with you this week."

"There's always next week," I said with a smile.

"Tell ya what, sweetie, next week I'll drive," she offered, and I shook my head. "What do you mean, no? You're the one that needs to relax and have a good time; I do that any time I please."

"I just…"

"You just nothing," she cut me off. "Now listen, let me take over for you for the next hour, you just go home. Get some rest, and maybe one of the other girls will drive you tonight." I opened my mouth to protest, but she gave me the infamous Mom look, so I decided against it.

My mind was in such a haze that I barely remembered driving home, let alone crawling into bed. I do know that I'd set my alarm to give me an hour to get ready before the night out, and I just knew I had to drive. It wasn't that Taylor, Kelsi, or Sharpay wouldn't drive, because I knew that any of them would. I just knew that if I had any amount of alcohol in me, I'd be spilling the beans about my mystery caller, and I wasn't quite ready to do that. I don't know why I'm so guarded about my life, especially with them. Isn't that what friends are for?

I'd probably been asleep for a good two hours when the phone rang. My heart jumped into my throat, and I immediately scrambled for the phone. "Hello?" I said, trying my hardest to sound friendly.

"Oh, yay, Gabi's in a good mood!" Taylor said with absolute glee. "Sharpay said she's driving tonight, so we'll be picking you up about 7."

"Maybe I should drive, I'm really tired…"

"Actually, being tired is the perfect reason for you to not to drive, so don't argue with me because you know I'm right. Now…what's gotten you in such a fabulous mood?"

"Can I plead the fifth?" I asked, a smile crossing my face.

"Oh hell no you don't, you'd better spill. What's his name?"

"I don't know… and really, there isn't anything to tell, I swear." I heard a commotion in the background, and Kelsi picked up one of the extensions.

"You've been holding out on us," she said, and I laughed.

"No, I haven't, really,"

"She's lying," Taylor interrupted.

"I say we pour large amounts of alcohol down her throat," Kelsi suggested.

"And then we'll make you talk," Taylor finished. Ah, the joys of having friends.

"Are you going to sick Sharpay on me too?" I asked, giggling.

"She's not here right now; she's taking a nap," Taylor replied.

"How's come she's driving when she's taking a nap, but I take a nap and I'm not allowed to drive?" I know my question didn't make much sense, but nothing had made much sense for the past few hours.

"Um, Gabi… she's not going to be taking a nap when she's driving," was Taylor's smartass reply.

"I asked for that, didn't I?"

"I'd say so, wouldn't you agree Kelsi?"

"She's losing it, Taylor."

"I so am not!" I exclaimed, but my smile gave away my lightheartedness. 'Can you actually hear someone smile through a phone?' I wondered.

"This calls for much Stoli," Taylor said. "Perhaps some cran with it… or some…what the fuck is that stuff she drinks?"

"Kahlua," Kelsi answered.

"You don't need to speak about me in the third person," I attempted to disrupt their conversation.

"It's a bit froo froo for me, but if it'll get her drunk and talking…"

"I'm so not talking, Taylor."

"That's funny, 'cause I hear your voice," Kelsi quipped, and Taylor was soon to agree.

"Ok, I'm going back to sleep now, the two of you can do your evil planning without me being involved. Just know that it won't work."

"Says who?" Kelsi asked, and I laughed.

"Goodbye," I said, still giggling, and I hung up. So maybe they were right; maybe I did need to relax and just have a good time tonight. I smiled again as the phone rang almost immediately, and without hesitation, I answered. "I'm still not drinking tonight."

"I didn't know drinking was a requirement." Oh…OH! Phone guy….Not John… calling me again! What do I say? How do I say it? "Are you still there, or have you hung up on me?"

"I'm here," I replied. "Hello, Not John."

"Ah, it is you. 'Ello Not Telling; I was concerned that perhaps I'd gotten the wrong number… or the right one this time…or the incorrect wrong number" I wanted to laugh, but was afraid that I would offend him again.

"Are you angry with me?" I asked, almost regretting it almost immediately.

"No, of course not." Again with the soothing tones, and I relaxed back into my pillows. "I was afraid you were angry with me."

"I was just wondering why you hung up so quickly."

"So you could sleep. You sounded exhausted."

"Liar."

"What?" It was more of a mock exclamation, and I allowed myself to laugh.

"You so didn't care if I was tired."

"You hurt me with your words, Not Telling. And how would you know whether or not I was concerned? You don't know me, remember?"

"I'm glad you called again," I admitted, then buried my face in my hands as if he could see me blushing.

"Are you, really?" There was no amusement in his voice, just a trace of sadness.

"Yes," I said quietly. "And, just for the record, I didn't go back to sleep."

"So I could have kept you on the phone as long as I wanted then? Damn, so much for chivalry."

"Just until I had to get ready for work." What was I doing? What was I saying? Was I inviting some stranger to phone me all hours of the night?

Of course I was.

"So what time do you work tomorrow?" he asked.

"I don't; I have the day off."

"Perfect. So I can call you later?"

"You can't stay on now?" I could hardly believe that question had come from me.

"Hell no, I need my sleep." He hadn't even finished the sentence before he was laughing. "I'm sorry… I actually have somewhere I have to be. I didn't want to phone you late if it would make you angry."

"That's sweet… not that you gave a damn last night." We both laughed at the comment, then I asked, "Did you get ahold of John?"

"Uh…no, no I haven't. I may have just gotten the numbers backwards; I'm horrible with that."

"It's not always a bad thing." Ack! Was I flirting with him? Bad Gabriella, bad!

"No it isn't." His words were slowed, as if he was letting the meaning of them sink in. "Damn… I have to go now. Are you sure it's alright?"

"Positive."

"Alright then… until later, Not Telling."

Wow, what do you know? You can hear a smile.


	2. Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.

CHAPTER 2

I had the Sisters of Mercy blaring from my speakers when the girls showed up. Taylor had a key to my apartment due to my absentmindedness, so they let themselves in while I was doing the finishing touches on my make up. I normally didn't bother, but I was feeling a bit more sassy than usual.

"Hell-oooooooooo," Taylor's voice floated thru the apartment.

"Up here!" I called out to her. She walked up the stairs and paused when she saw me in the bedroom mirror.

"Get OUT!" she exclaimed.

"That's exactly what I plan on doing," I replied, fixing my lip gloss. "Are we ready?"

So the four of us set out for our weekly girls night out. It was always interesting and fun, regardless of whether or not I was drinking. Being with the girls was my reminder that you don't have to be someone's carbon copy to get along with them.

Taylor was the unofficial "leader" of our little group. She was of Hungarian decent, with the striking dark beauty that goes along with it.. Although she was the only one of us who was married or had children, it never did seem to change her. Her life was something I could only dream of… the devoted husband, two insanely cool and fun children, and helped run the family computer business. All that and she still was able to go out and have fun.

Kelsi was the gypsy of us, always moving and forever changing. Taylor would tease her about being her long lost cousin, but Kelsi would quickly remind her that she was Italian, not Hungarian, and Chef Boyardee does not know how to make ravioli. She had spent some time as a teacher in elementary schools, but was so frustrated with the system that she didn't stay. Although she was the free spirit of us, she longed for family roots. I suppose that's where we came in.

Sharpay was the absolute cutie of the group… the blonde hair, sparkling eyes, and infectious laughter drew people to her, even in her shy moments. She was the one I knew least about, although her string of boyfriends left for endless amounts of discussion. She was also the one who pointed out that I must be at least a little disturbed if I enjoyed giving shots.

So, where did I fit in? I've always wondered. I wasn't the pretty one. I felt the three of them were all beautiful, each in their own way, but I was on the plain side. I wasn't the one who could hold a conversation for hours on end. If it was silly, sure… but I have always doubted my own ability to… well, to not come off looking like some blathering idiot. I wasn't the cool one; I was far too much of a dork for that. But the absolute wonderful thing about being with Taylor, Kelsi, and Sharpay was it didn't matter how I looked or what I said or how I acted, so long as the bitchy side of me stayed at home. I could just…be. So, that's what I did most of the time. Ok, so there were many nights that I felt like an intruder who just smiled and laughed at certain intervals, kind of like an outsider looking in. That could be completely of my own doing though. I'm no stranger to my own faults, and holding myself at a distance from others is most definitely one of them.

"Um, hello… Miss Gabriella?" Sharpay waved her hand in front of my face through the thick smoke in the bar. I giggled through my slightly buzzed haze and realized that the majority of the smoke was coming from our table.

"I'm here, I'm here. Which boyfriend this time?" I asked. Yes, I was drinking. I couldn't help it; there was something about tonight that just felt different.

"Hey! I resent that!" Sharpay exclaimed.

"Actually, Miss 'I'm in Outer Space', we were discussing my day at work," Kelsi corrected me.

"Sorry… is our next round here? This one's on me." I pulled some money out of my purse.

"It's gonna end up all over you and everyone else if you don't slow down," Taylor said as she lit another cigarette. As intelligent as ever, I simply stuck my tongue out at her.

"Anyhow…without further interruptions… so I was driving the motorized cart back up front since some jerk had left it by the fresh vegetable section…"

"Vegetable section? In a clothing store?" I interrupted.

"That was my last job," Kelsi reminded me. "Pay attention." I nodded as I accepted the new round of drinks, and Kelsi continued. "Ok, so there was this lady up there talking to one of the managers, and she says to him… fuck? What did she say? Right, she says that it's so nice that they have motorized carts there to help people, like the poor disabled Indian girl. And she pointed at me." I nearly spit my drink out from the laughter, and of course Sharpay and Taylor thought it was an absolute hoot. "Do I look Indian? Or disabled, for that matter? Now, don't everyone stop laughing and answer at once."

"Poor disabled Indian girl," Taylor said mockingly and patted Kelsi on the back. Yes, I'm sure she was just appointed a new nickname of sorts; it happens quite frequently with our little group.

"Ok, so in the spirit of 'Let's stop picking on Kelsi', I think our own Miss Gabriella has something she's not sharing with us."

"Sorry… Not Telling." I didn't even try to hide the smile, but it wasn't as if I was lying to them either. What was there to tell, really?

"Riiiiiight," Taylor said, and I could almost swear I saw devil horns creep up on her head. "Are you done with your drink yet?"

"Gees, Gabi, you're drinking us all under the table!" Sharpay exclaimed, wide-eyed. I batted my eyelashes as I turned to her.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Taylor quipped as she motioned to the waitress to bring another drink for me.

"Why don't you tell us about your latest boy toy?" I asked Sharpay.

"Same one as last week, and stop trying to change the subject." I gasped and placed my hand over my heart. "Ha ha, very funny."

"There's nothing to tell, I swear!" I made a mental note to slow down on the drinking so that I wouldn't spill the beans about my mystery caller. When the bartender yelled out for last call, I began to pout. "Damn, did we close the bar again?"

"Seems to be a habit," Kelsi replied.

"And what was up with you forwarding your home calls to your cell phone? You never do that," Taylor pointed out.

"You never know when an emergency might creep up."

"Like you'd be able to handle one right now," Sharpay remarked and I stuck my tongue out at her.

"And you're using that tongue an awful lot here tonight. You're so not going home until you spill." Leave it to Taylor to notice. I made the mock zipping my lips gesture and went back to my drink.

I did manage to avoid the subject through the end of our evening at the bar, but as we walked out of there, my phone began to ring. I glanced at it, and the time, although a bit fuzzy, was a very clear 2:35 am. I don't think my smile could have been brighter as I answered the phone.

"Ello, ello," I said with just the slightest hint of a slur.

"Either you're making fun of me, or you did have something to drink this evening." Damn…damn! Why did he have to call when I had three pairs of intruding eyes staring at me? Not that I cared at that point, and I turned to walk the other way.

"No, I'm so not making fun of you."

"You have been drinking. This should be fun." He sounded a bit more perky than he had the previous night when he'd called, so I knew there was no sarcasm in his voice.

"Who is it? Is it him?" Taylor whispered and I turned yet again, with the three of them still following me.

"Not Telling," I said back to the girls.

"How many times must we go over this? You're Not Telling."

"Right, sorry," I said to him, and then called back to the girls "Not John."

"John? Who's John?" Kelsi asked, confused and I shrugged.

"Should I let you go?" he asked.

"No, no… don't hang up. I don't have to work tomorrow, I can talk." Someone had grabbed ahold of my shoulders and was steering me towards Sharpay's car.

"Are you sure?" I heard commotion in the background on his end of the line, and he said "Hold on just a moment, ok?"

"Ok," I replied, and mouthed the words 'I'm on hold' to the girls as we were getting in the vehicle. Sharpay started up the car, but turned the radio down low so that I could hear and they could spy.

"I'm so sorry," he finally breathed, "I have a few last minute things to straighten out. Will you still be conscious later?"

"Of course! Well, um… maybe."

"I'll try to call, I promise."

"Well, I can't call you since I don't have your number." A few eyebrows raised in the car at that statement, and I heard him laugh softly.

"Don't feel bad, I don't have it either. My cell bit the dust and I'm on the road."

"Ah, I see."

"I'll try you back in a bit, and if I don't get you I'll try tomorrow."

'Oh you got me alright,' I thought to myself in my drunken state. "Ok… bye, Not John."

"No…until later, Not Telling." I shivered involuntarily as I heard him hang up the phone.

"Not John?" Taylor asked slowly, and I gave the most innocent smile I could. "Hell no you don't. Spill."

So, I did. All of it, which is rare for me. I knew it didn't make much sense, and wasn't really much of a reason for me to be so happy. I have no idea what was up with the butterflies in my stomach, or the silly grin on my face, or my heart skipping a beat every time I heard this stranger's voice. The girls, of course, were completely intrigued. It's not even close to "me" to be this way.

"Wow." That was about all I could get Kelsi to say. They were in my apartment for a quick pit stop before going our separate ways, and I was sitting Indian style in my papasan chair with a bottle of Gatorade and two Motrins in my hand. Yes, I knew how to ward off a hangover, thank you.

"But… but… I don't get it."

"It's the sex voice, he has to have a pure sex voice," Taylor was trying to help me.

"You think?" I asked, leaning back. I had unconsciously brought the receiver close to me, just in case he called. I looked at it absentmindedly and sighed.

"Speaking of sex voices! Ladies, I have scored us what we have all been hoping for," Kelsi spoke up.

"Troy Bolton tickets?" Sharpay asked excitedly, and Kelsi pulled them out of her bag, holding them up over her head. We all giggled and cheered, excited as we could possibly be.

"And I got five of them, in case Sharon could go."

"Sharon? At Troy Bolton? I dunno…" my voice trailed off. "I think she's going off with her husband that week anyhow."

"We have five weeks to plan. If she can't go, we'll find someone to," Taylor said with a shrug. "Shesh, it's going on 4! I have to go."

"Same here. You'll be ok, Gabi?" Sharpay asked, and I smiled.

"Aren't I always? You guys be careful."

"Drink your Gatorade," Kelsi said, pointing a finger at me.

"Sure thing. Oh, and you two make sure the Poor Disabled Indian Girl makes it down the stairs." That comment was met with much laughter and Kelsi shook her head.

"I'll never live that down."

"Bye, Not Telling," Taylor teased, and they shut the door.

I leaned back into the chair, the alcohol and lack of sleep catching up with me very quickly. I lost track of the last time I'd been so relaxed, even with all of the questions and thoughts racing through my mind. The stereo was playing Beethoven softly in the background, the lights were on low, and in my mind I was in the middle of a dark field dancing, twirling, kissing a man whose face I couldn't see…

I woke with a start when the phone rang. The sun was peering through my shades, and a glance at the clock told me it was 8:45. I picked up the receiver and answered before it went to voicemail.

"Hello?" No I don't have much of a morning voice, and people can tell when I've just woke up.

"I'm sorry…I have a bad habit of disturbing you." He sounded melancholy, and for some reason it tugged at my heart.

"You're not disturbing me, so don't you dare hang up." I heard take a sip of his drink and wondered to myself if he'd even been to sleep.

"Have you ever been so tired that you can't sleep?" Well, that answered my question.

"Many nights. Sometimes it isn't even being so tired, it's the having a million thoughts running through my head."

"Exactly, exactly." I heard him take another drink, and he exhaled with a sigh. "All the questions, all the fucking time…no answers. I thought I'd have them by now."

"Sometimes the answers are right in front of you, sometimes they require a little soul searching."

"Why is it that things never get easier, though? Even when you'd think, when you have…not everything, but so much more than you'd thought you would, but still…hell I don't know. And then…being surrounded by people. Swarms of people, so many you could never possibly remember them all, and just being…"

"Alone," I finished for him when his voice trailed off.

"Exactly."

"But you're not, not really. You can talk to me."

"Can I really?" he asked.

"Tell you what…cross your arms."

"My what?"

"Cross your arms, in front of you. Got it?"

"Okay," he said slowly. "Arms are crossed."

"Now squeeze," I commanded. "As tight as you can. Did you do that?"

"What the fuck was that supposed to do?" he asked with a laugh. "Is that some new age therapy?"

"No, an old fashioned one," I replied. "That's a hug, from me. You know, since I'm not there to actually give it to you."

He was silent for the longest time, but I could hear him breathing so I know he hadn't hung up the phone. Not knowing whether or not I'd crossed a line, or offended him in some way, I wasn't sure what to say next, but I had to say something.

"Are you still there Not John?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm still here." His voice was lower, more controlled than it had been before. "And I needed that. Thank you."

So began our anonymous friendship.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THREE**

"I'm terribly sorry that I can't go," Sharon was saying. "Robert is just adamant that we go to see his family that weekend."

"It's not a problem, Sharon, really," I replied with a smile. "You go, have fun. And we'll go have fun. I'm sure we can find someone to take the extra ticket."

"Let me pay for it." She began to pull money out of her purse and I gave her my own version of a mom face, which was a bit hard to pull off since I had no kids of my own. It was less than a week before the show, and we were enjoying as quiet of a lunch as we could in the hospital cafeteria.

"I won't take it," I said defiantly. "And you can't make me."

"Can I comment for the millionth time about your amazing mood?" I laughed and shrugged. Almost every night…or morning, depending on how you looked at it… Not John had called. Our conversations varied from the philosophical to the completely insane, and I looked forward to 2:35 am to roll around.

The job was the same, the friends were the same, but somehow I…wasn't. Things didn't bother me the way they had before, even with my severe lack of sleep. I was smiling more, laughing often, and enjoying life for the first time in so long. It made girls night out that much more fun, and made the trivial things that had gotten me in the worst of moods seem minute.

Not John and I could talk about almost anything, and we did. We exchanged opinions on religion and politics, and sometimes talked complete nonsense. He told me of the people he would meet, although we didn't really speak about what either of us did for a living. Some forms of anonymity were still observed, and that was fine with me. It didn't matter what his name or occupation was, all that mattered was he brought some light into my life. I'd like to believe I was doing the same for him.

With the show coming closer, though, my attention was straying more and more. I'd waited two years to see Troy Bolton live, and the fact that I was going with the girls made it that much better. There was the slight, but I stress slight, dilemma of finding a person to take the fifth ticket, so as soon as I got home that evening, I called Taylor.

"Hi, Gabi," her oldest daughter, Moira, said when she answered. Gotta love Caller I.D. "Mom's coming, just give her a sec."

"Thanks, Moira. How are you?"

"Still not speaking with any of you, since you're going to see Troy without me." I laughed at that comment, and Taylor took the phone from her.

"Isn't she just evil?"

"She is the spawn of you."

"Very true. So, what's up?"

"Sharon can't go. I knew she couldn't, but I was kinda hoping."

"So, we have an extra ticket, hmmm… oh, OH! Nah… I don't think it's such a good idea."

"Since when have you come up with a bad idea?"

"Flattery, how nice. Remind me to thank Not John when I finally pry the phone away from you when he's on it. Anyhow….um, I think I should run this by everyone… what about Moira?"

"Perfect!" I exclaimed.

"Are you sure?" She sounded a little worried, but I was being completely honest.

"Just like I said, she's the spawn of you, she'll have a blast! And she's 13 now, it's kind of a rite-of-passage."

"I don't want to say anything to her yet. I want to talk to Sharpay and Kelsi first. Are you sure, Gabi?"

"I think this is the best one you've come up with. And I know Sharpay and Kelsi won't have a problem with it."

And I was right; everyone was ecstatic with the idea of joining in on Moira's first grown up adventure. Not just any adventure…it was one that involved the epitome of rockstardom. After receiving the news that it was official, and arguing a bit with my mother about my lack of visitage, I settled in for the evening. I knew that Not John would be calling that morning. I hadn't talked to him in a few days; he'd had a couple of days off and wasn't able to call.

I was dreading the day, if it came, when he told me that he wasn't going to be on the road anymore and wouldn't be calling me to keep him company…or the day when he found someone to actually be by his side. I don't know…is it really possible to care for someone you don't know? And for someone I didn't know, how was it that I knew so much about him? His quirky sense of humor was infectious, his wit sharp as a tack, and yet for such a fun package he certainly seemed burdened with an older soul.

I still had my alarm set, just in case he either didn't call or we lost complete track of time. That had happened only once before, and I couldn't afford for it to happen again. I had my vacation coming up, thank you very much, and wasn't going to spoil it by having to make up missed time. So I curled up in my bed, radio playing softly in the background, and the receiver close enough to me to grab it at a moments notice.

My dreams had also begun to be more vivid, and leaning towards the sensual nature. I realize that it had been so long for me that if it were humanly possible there'd be cobwebs up there, but these dreams were becoming so explicit that I'd swear I was blushing when I woke up. The setting was always dark, I could never see his face, but I could hear his whispers in my ear…and doesn't it figure he'd have that damn soothing, soft voice I heard night after night over the phone?

The dream that night was no exception. His caresses were long and seeking, knowing just where to touch and just where to apply pressure to have me moaning in ecstasy. And his kisses… what is it about those soft kisses that gradually build into more? You know what I'm talking about; the kisses that end up leaving you gasping for breath, doing any and everything to remove all barriers between you.

"Don't make me wait," I managed to whisper against his lips, and he laughed softly, deep in his throat.

"Just a little while longer."

I whimpered as he held me steady. "Please…"

"You have to do something first."

"Just tell me…just tell me…" My voice trailed off as his kisses trailed down my neck, nibbling and sucking his way back towards my ear.

"Answer the phone."

I woke with a start, and realized my phone was ringing. I shook my head to clear it and picked up the receiver. "Hello?"

"You sound a bit breathless."

'You have no idea,' I thought, but kept that to myself. "I…had to get up to get the phone," I lied. "I didn't want to miss your call."

"Good save, good save." He didn't sound as happy as he had the last time I'd spoke with him.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Talking to you, of course. How are you?"

"I should be asking that question. What the hell is that clicking sound?"

"Just this pen I've been failing miserably to write with."

"So you click your pen incessantly when you can't write? And what are you writing, or not writing, anyhow?"

"It's just nerves. Well, nerves and boredom," he said with a laugh, avoiding my more intrusive question.

"Well, that's nice to know since you're talking to me."

"No putting words in my mouth," he scolded. "You know I wouldn't call you if I didn't want to." Again with the butterflies in my stomach.

"And a good save for you. Now, how was your time off?" He sighed at that question. "What? Most people enjoy a little 'r and r'."

"I still had stuff to do, just not… um, yeah, so… I'm sorry, it's just been a bad day. And no, before you ask, it's not something I am wanting to talk about, so just tell me how your day was."

"Invigorating and frustrating at the same time."

"How so?"

"My mother's angry with me for not going to see her lately. I mean, I would go, but she pries into my personal business and that just gets on my nerves. Oh, and I haven't seen my brothers or sisters, so apparently I'm avoiding the whole lot of them."

"Gets on your… do you have any idea how lucky you are?" he snapped at me, catching me completely off guard. Without missing a beat, he continued, "They're… there for you, right there, and they're your family. You're obviously not hundreds of miles away, and there's nothing stopping you."

"I…know this, and I'm sorry that I've made you angry…"

"I'm not…. I'm not angry…ok, that's a lie, yes I am." He had made his tone much softer, though, and somehow that was reassuring to me. "Promise me that you'll go and you'll visit her."

"I'm going to," I promised. "I just was putting it off."

"Well don't." He took a deep breath and paused, which he normally did when something aggravated him. "You don't know what could happen day to day, don't waste this time you have. And enjoy it, because some day you may need them there and they may be too busy for you, or just.. not there anymore."

"What about you?" I asked.

"What about me? I don't want to talk about me, I've already told you that. I want an answer from you."

"What answer?"

"Not…Telling…Christine…" he stopped short with a laugh. Words cannot begin to describe what it felt like to hear him use my middle name for the first time since that phone call where I'd mentioned it to him. "I'm not meaning to be so hateful, really. Please, just appreciate what you have."

"I will." I reached for bottle of water, having the feeling this was going to be a long night. "So long as you promise you'll stop being angry with me."

"I miss them."

"Miss who?" I asked, not quite following his conversation.

"Anyhow, so I met these people from Australia today, and they were just fascinating, as most Australians are…"

He was famous for changing the subject on me, but this one seemed to haunt me. I had no idea if he missed friends, family, girlfriends, a wife, kids… he never elaborated on who the 'them' was. It actually bothered me more than it should have, like having just a glimpse at the real person and having it taken away. Changing the subject did help to lighten his mood, so I humored him. The time went by much quicker than either of us thought it would, and soon my alarm clock was screaming an old eighties tune that should have died with the decade.

"Aaaah, noooooo!" I exclaimed, running over to the alarm clock before any one else could build any more cities on rock and roll.

"How could you not like that song?"

"Because it's dreadful," I replied with a mock shudder, and he laughed.

"That it is, and I see I'm beginning to rub off on you. Dreadful, shesh." He laughed again at the remark.

"You're…mocking me."

"No, no…" he cleared his throat and stifled his last bit of laughter. "We both know you wouldn't have said that word a few weeks ago."

"How would you know?" I asked, defensive but smiling broadly.

"You probably would have said," He cleared his throat and did his best imitation of me, "Man, this song sucks." I laughed at his comment, and he asked, "How close was I?"

"You do me so well," I teased.

"Ah, you're getting a bit cheeky there, aren't you? And, on that note, you should go get ready for work."

"Don't wanna," I protested, sitting Indian style on my bed, my bottom lip sticking out as if he could see.

"Too damn bad. Besides, I need to get some sleep. Soooooo…when I call tomorrow morning, you're going to tell me all about how your visit with your mother went, got it?"

"I have to go today?"

"Don't whine, it's unbecoming. And you be sure to tell her everything there is to know about your life, got it?"

"Not everything," I disagreed.

"Well, look at the bright side…at least we're actually speaking to one another and didn't meet in some damn chatroom online." I laughed, but again got the butterflies in my stomach. Sometimes he spoke of us as if we were a couple, although it was quite obvious that we weren't. I was also still curious about the "them" he'd mentioned much earlier in our conversation.

"Not John…"

"Don't ask," he cut me off as if he'd read my mind. "Please," he added to soften the harshness.

"Okay, I won't," I agreed. "So you're calling me again tomorrow? In, say, less than 24 hours?" He laughed softly.

"Yes I will. And I expect a full report."

"Yes sir. Have a good sleep and an even better day, Not John."

"You have a fabulous day as well, Not Telling," he said, then we hung up.

Even with him being upset with me, I still floated through the day, getting by on pure momentum of having spoken with him. I was only scheduled until 3 that afternoon, so on my lunch break I pulled out my cell phone and dialed a very familiar number. My mother was ever so pleased when I asked her out to dinner that evening. When I picked her up to go to the restaurant, she was all about the twenty questions.

"How have you been?" she asked cheerfully.

"Tired and fabulous, all at the same time," I responded with a smile. Yes, at times she does get on my nerves, but she's still my mom. I was glad that Not John had insisted that I spend some time with her, and not just because it gave me a funny anecdote for the evening's conversation with him.

While we were enjoying our meal she proceeded to tell me everything there is to know about all of my brothers and sisters, plus aunts and uncles and even a few old neighbors that I couldn't remember to save my life. Then came the question I'd dreaded since picking her up.

"So, what about you, Gabi? Do you have anyone special in your life?"

I took a deep breath before I answered her, and thought to myself 'Okay, here we go.' "Yes, Mom, I…sort of do."

"What's his name?"

"I'm not sure what his name is. And before you interrupt, no we didn't meet on the Internet. We actually haven't met at all; he just accidentally called my number one night and we've been talking ever since. Oh, and he has this unbelievable sexy voice to just die for."

She sat there, with one eyebrow up staring at me for the longest time, then finally said, "Riiiiiight, now why don't you tell me what's really going on."

Bingo! It worked. Every time I told her the truth she never believed me.

"So, you just told her," Not John was saying later that evening.

"Of course! Kind of like when I was a teenager and her and dad would go out of town; they'd ask what we did, we'd tell them. 'Mom, Dad, we had a wild ass party, got drunk, smoked some pot, and had sex with our boyfriends in your bedroom.' They didn't believe us then either."

He laughed then…a real laugh, one that in spite of how silly our conversations would get I hadn't heard from him in quite awhile. "So you had a wonderful evening, then. Other than your mother calling you a liar, how are you?"

"I've basically had no sleep; I just got home about eleven."

"I'm so sorry, do you want me to let you go?"

"No, no… but…thank you."

"For what?" he asked.

"I don't know if I would have gone…"

"What, if I hadn't guilted you into it? I'm good at that, you know."

"I'm being serious, Not John." The irony of that phrase wasn't lost on us, and we both laughed. "Are you…"

"I'm fine, and I'm content to hear about your evening."

"That's not what I was going to ask."

"I'll tell you when I'm ready to, I promise," he said to me, his voice soft and low. "But I wont be able to phone again until Friday…between Friday and Saturday…my schedule is just crammed full. Is that alright?"

I almost asked him not to call, since that was the night that the girls and I were going to see Troy Bolton, but I figured we'd be back in the hotel by then and I'd be able to speak with him no problem. I didn't want to go for too long without speaking with him, as he did seem to put me in quite a good mood.

Perhaps if I'd asked him not to call, things would have turned out differently.


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

Thursday afternoon I went home early from work with one hell of a raging migraine. I had to get rid of it, absolutely had to. We were leaving Friday morning on our road trip to Cleveland, the hotel was booked, and the tickets were still safe with Kelsi. And me? I was curled up in my bed, covers pulled up around my face, open just enough for me to breathe. I had taken my usual cocktail of Excedrin Migraine and Diet Pepsi hoping beyond all hope that this headache wouldn't linger. I hadn't called the girls to tell them I wouldn't be coming by for dinner, so when the ringing phone jolted me from my sleep I was expecting it to be Taylor scolding me for making them worry.

I couldn't have been happier to be wrong.

"Okay, I lied, I'm calling on Thursday instead of Friday, or Saturday, or whenever it was I told you I'd call." You could almost feel the joy in Not John's voice radiate straight through.

"Someone's of the giddy," I commented, trying to not let on how absolutely shitty I felt.

"Today has just been… it's just been… well, it's been one of the best I've had in a long time and I can't really get into details and all that shit, but I wanted to share it… with you."

Wow. Oh…wow.

"Not Telling?"

"I'm here, I'm here," I said, smiling through my pain. "I'd ask you to elaborate just to hear you like this."

"I'm just," his voice trailed off and he laughed.

"Are you jumping up and down?"

"I was," he admitted, still laughing. I started laughing also then stopped abruptly with a groan, grabbing my head. "What's wrong?"

"No changing the subject," I said. "Not this time."

"I…kinda took my own advice," he said sheepishly. From the sounds in the background I could almost see him hop onto a couch, stretched out, that smile I could hear beaming. I was racking my brain to try and decipher his semi-cryptic message when he added, "I called for reinforcements."

"Reinforce…"

"My brother got here a little bit ago…" He stopped short of anything else, as if he'd said too much already.

"So you're going to go cause all kinds of trouble?" I asked, genuinely happy for him. Even without discussing personal details it was obvious that although he wasn't traveling completely alone he wasn't with anyone he considered a confidante, or someone he could truly unwind with.

"Maybe?" The lift in his voice was so damn adorable. "What about you?"

"Eh…I'm just trying to get rid of this migraine," I found myself admitting.

"I'm sorry, here I am bouncing off the walls probably making it worse for you."

"Don't you dare hang up or I'll hunt you down and kick your ass and there goes your night out raising hell with your brother."

"Hell, it might be worth it just to see you try."

He had no idea what it did to me when he made comments like that. Migraine or not, my stomach did that extreme dip like it does when you're going over one of those hills really fast in your car…the exhilarating kind that make you want to turn around and drive that same path all over again.

"Right, ya wimp, you'd never tell me anything that would help me find you."

"Wimp? Right, woman, you'll see. You're gonna eat those words… someday."

What an insufferable tease!

"Anyhow, back to you," he continued. "Did you take anything?"

"The usual," I replied.

"Excedrin Migraine and Diet Pepsi," he rattled off just as easily as he could rattle off my phone number, which he'd told me offhandedly once that he now knew by heart. "Is it working this time?"

"It better," I muttered.

"Well, at least it isn't Motrin and Gatorade, or I'd know you were out drinking and being a shameless hussy." I couldn't help but laugh, which lead to another groan as I held my aching head. "Oh wait…that was it, wasn't it?"

"Not yet," I answered. "You're not the only one planning on going out and raising hell."

"Ah, tomorrow's Friday. Girl's Night."

"Damn straight."

"Poor Disabled Indian Girl too?"

"She's driving." Times like these reminded me exactly how much Not John and I shared without actually sharing anything at all.

"And this time, we can trade stories instead of me just living vicariously through you." He almost sounded as if he was proud of himself for accomplishing such a feat.

"You have adventures of your own," I pointed out.

"Yeah, but this time…"He stopped short again.

I wanted to ask 'This time WHAT?' just to see if he'd answer, but again I took the coward's way out and allowed him to change the subject.

Or so I thought.

"Does it bother you?" he asked suddenly.

"Does what bother me?"

"Not…knowing, not really knowing. Does it bother you?" I knew exactly what he was referring to.

"Sometimes," I admitted. "Sometimes more than you would possibly know." Ack! Whatever happened to my inner dialogue staying that way?

"Interesting." He paused and I heard him open a can of some sort and take a drink. "You know, I had a dream about you." I felt heat rising to my face as I thought of the explicit dreams I'd had of him.

"Did you really?"

"Mmm hmmm, it was rather intriguing." He took another drink and like the accomplished flirt that he obviously was he continued. "I think that's another reason why I had to call you."

"Are you going to elaborate, or change the subject on me again?"

"You know how sometimes when you answer the phone you're kinda breathless? Those times when you say you had to run to get the phone?"

"Yes," I answered, heat radiating through my body. This man had no idea what he was doing to me. Or did he?

"You've gotta stop doing that."

Oh. Dear. Lord. It wasn't so much what he said but how he said it, his voice just a touch lower, a slight rasp to it that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

"And if I don't?"

"Are you forgetting? I have your number. I can find you." I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from involuntarily sighing.

"Promises, promises," I teased. "I'll believe it when I see it."

"Bet me."

"You're a liar and a tease."

"One of these days I'm going to prove you wrong," he said, his voice cutting straight through me officially deeming me in need of a cold shower. I was saved from trying to come up with a coherent reply when I heard someone knocking at his door. "Damn… guess we'll have to continue this some other time. Until later…"

"Wait a minute, hold up," I cut him off. "Does it bother you?"

"Does what bother…oh, the not knowing?"

"Right."

He paused for a moment and I lay there with my eyes closed wondering what his answer would be.

"Yes…yes. Yes."

A sudden familiarity flooded over me and I sat up with a jolt, ignoring my head. "What did you say?"

"You heard me. Until later, Not Telling." He refused to say 'good-bye', which I had come to find endearing.

"Until later, Not John," I said, that creeping déjà vu sensation washing over me as he laughed and hung up the phone.

That wasn't just a similarity, that was the same as…'No, Gabriella,' I said to myself. 'There is no way in hell.'

But there was a way to find out.

In spite of it being nearly eight o'clock, well past dinnertime, I phoned Taylor's house and informed her that I was on my way over.

"What's going on?" Taylor asked, concerned.

"I need that…tape thingy."

"Oh, that's real specific."

"That one that Moira made, the one we were going to watch."

"In preparation? It's on, get your ass over here."

I didn't bother with makeup, pinned my curls up as best I could, and rushed over to Taylor's house. It was bustling with excitement as per usual, but perhaps just a bit more this time. My eyes were still straining due to the effects of my migraine, but there was something I just had to know.

"Aunt Gabi!" Taylor's youngest daughter, Kiera, greeted me with glee as she jumped up into my arms. Lucky for me she was rather small for four years old.

"Hi, Princess, where's everyone congregating?"

"Mommy and them is in the basement with the TV stuff on, and are you really goin away tomorrow?"

"We'll be back," I reassured her as I made my way to the basement stairs. I could hear Sharpay whistling at the TV and I knew they were in the midst of watching Moira's tape of her favorite Troy Bolton concert moments she had taped off the TV. It was just about at the spot I was needing to see and I bounded down the steps and turned the corner just in time to see Troy Bolton look straight into the camera, straight at me. You know that moment…

"Yes…yes. Yes."

And with that, I dropped my purse and all its belongings onto the floor.


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FIVE**

I sat in stunned silence on the couch staring at the television as conversation buzzed all around me. I hadn't said a word to any of them as I was still trying to digest the information myself. I was going over and over my conversations with him trying to convince myself this was all in my head.

What was it he had said about Johns? Oh, it was,_ 'I'm Not John. Well, except I know Johns, lots of them, some of them it's their last name, kinda'_… My face flared red as we watched some behind-the-scenes footage with Troy and his back up singer Anthony Johns, which had Sharpay cat-calling again.

"Mark loves when I watch this tape," Taylor commented as she took a sip of wine. "Oh, but this part kills me."

This was where Moira had added some footage of Troy and his brother, Danny. Danny had been killed in a car accident and Troy did an interview about life with his brother. The tears he had in his eyes brought a collective "Awww," from all of the girls, and another recollection for me… _'You don't know what could happen day to day, don't waste this time you have. And enjoy it, because some day you may need them there and they may be too busy for you, or just.. not there anymore.'_

I choked back tears of my own and Kelsi patted me on the back. "It gets me every time too, Gabi."

How could I have not known? This whole time, here I was talking to one of the most successful recording artists of his time, someone whose career I had followed religiously. He was one of the only entertainers that reduced me and my friends to absolute fan girl status, and I didn't know.

Here was one of the world's most eligible, sexy, incredibly talented bachelors, and he had spent the last five weeks talking to me.

Me.

This was bad, this was so so bad. The timing couldn't possibly be worse! No time to lose that 20 pounds I kept telling myself I needed to get rid of, no time to get that sexy haircut, no time to get a new stunning outfit, nothing to knock this man's proverbial socks off. There was no way in hell I could meet him, no matter how determined the rest of the group was. There was no way I could walk up to him, plain ol me, surrounded by some of the most beautiful people in this world and say, 'Hey, I know you're way out of my league, but guess who I am.'

And the thought of it all, my dreams I had held onto for the most beautiful soul I'd ever spoken with, broke my heart.

"Gabi…are you ok?" Kelsi asked and I nodded.

"I'm good, just this stupid migraine."

"Did you take your stuff?"

"Earlier today. I think I may need some more, though."

"Hey," Taylor suddenly spoke up, "what did you need this tape for?" Tears filled my eyes as I watched him on that stage again, giving his half smile for his adoring masses, and took a deep breath before I answered.

"Nothing," I lied. "I just wanted to prepare." I plastered on my best fake-but-I-feel-like-shit smile, and although one would think they'd know me well enough, they all accepted my excuse with smiles of their own. I took one last look at the screen before walking back up the stairs thinking to myself, 'He'd know, just by the sound of my voice. He would know.'

I tossed and turned all night trying to figure out a way to get out of the mission that the girls had decided we were going on. I finally gave up about 6 am and turned on my iTunes music, hit the shuffle button, and proceeded to go through my bags making sure I had everything I needed. Our hotel was one of the swankiest in Cleveland, something I would never have paid for on a normal occasion. Of course when I had agreed to it I was in on this mission to meet Troy. Taylor had one of those creeping up the spine feelings when she researched this one so she booked it stating either we'd meet him there or get stalked by a serial killer or something. At the time I had found it amusing, and now here I was scrutinizing every piece of clothing I owned, damning the curves I was genetically cursed with. Why couldn't I be a size zero, or at least a 2? Why couldn't I be Hollywood gorgeous? Why couldn't I…

The phone was ringing and I rushed from my bathroom to get it. I had told Sharpay I would pick her up on the way to Taylor's and thanks to my sudden panic over wardrobe I was running late.

"I'm on my way but I can't find a thing to wear," I said quickly as I answered the phone.

"Keep talking that way and you don't have to wear a damn thing."

This time I could see him saying it…I felt my pulse quicken that much more as I pictured him lying there, hair tousled, those smoldering eyes narrowed and…

"And how many times must I tell you to stop teasing me?" I asked. 'Just once more, let me have this one last conversation with him before this gets shot all to hell.'

"How many times must I tell you that I'm not?"

"How much hell did you raise?" I asked, changing the subject. I couldn't have him saying he'd come see me and risk the chance of it actually happening. Not now.

"Enough to require possible damage control," he said, his laughter easing all the tension from my shoulders.

"What did you do?" I couldn't control the tone of my voice, I know it came off sounding mom-like, but it made him laugh even harder.

"Believe it or not you may actually hear about it."

Oh, this should be good.

"From you?"

"I wish," he said softly, possibly thinking I couldn't hear him, and my heart skipped a beat. "Nah, you'll just have to suffer. I was just calling to tell you that you have no idea how close to your area code I am right now."

'You're three and a half hours away from my house, and I'm on my way up there to see you,' my heart was screaming, but my brain forced my mouth to say, "Since I cannot guess, you will tell me."

"Very, and that's all I'm telling you. Migraine gone?"

"Sorta?" I answered honestly. I was under so much stress I still had that nagging tension headache that was hanging on.

"Tell me it's not over not knowing what to wear, Not Telling," he teased me.

Yes, yes it is over not knowing what to wear! And not being beautiful, and not being one of those tiny girls, and not being anything you'd look twice at, and…

"No, dork, it's not over what I don't have to wear," I said, laughing off his comment.

"Liar." Again I was amazed at how much he knew about me, sight unseen.

"Look…(God, I almost called him Troy!) you have no clue what it's like being a girl."

"You're right, I don't. But I do know that you were in a hurry, so just grab something, say 'fuck it', and go. It will be perfect, trust me."

I couldn't stop the tear that fell down my cheek. If he'd only known, if I would just tell him.

"Not Telling… are you still there?" he sing-songed, and I sobbed again, knowing without a doubt in my mind that if I hadn't already figured out who he was, he so would have just given it away. "Heeeyyyyy…" His tone changed immediately. "Wait, don't…Christine, please don't cry."

'It's Gabriella,' I wanted to say. 'It's Gabriella Christine, and I've completely fallen for you, and you would never be seen with me.'

"What is wrong?" he asked. "I know…I mean, I'll listen, if you want me to."

"I'm ok." Again with the lying. "It's just an emotional day, that's all. No…nothing to worry about, not that you would,"

"I would," he cut me off. "Just…hey, do something for me."

'Anything,' I wish I'd had the guts to say. "What's that?"

"It's…something that a friend did for me once. Cross you arms."

Oh God.

"They're crossed." My voice was strained from trying to hold back my tears.

"Now squeeze, as hard as you can."

Why, why, why?

"There," he finished, his voice emotional now as well. "A hug from me. You know, since I'm not there to give it to you." He laughed softly at his mimicking of me before continuing. "I know how much I had needed it, and how much it meant to me."

"Thank you," I nearly choked on the words, thinking to myself 'Yes, Troy, you're right, at times those two words are so trite and don't begin to describe what you feel.'

"If it helps, when all else fails with me, I just grab something black. He better be worth all this trouble you're going through." Damn it, why'd he always have to do that? If he only knew.

"Wha??? No, no, no… It's Friday."

"Isn't it a bit early to worry about Girls Night?"

"Technically no," I said about the time my cell phone started ringing.

"And that's the person you're late picking up, I'm sure."

"Psychic as ever," I giggled, wiping the tears from my face.

"I have to go, too."

"Damage control?" I asked and he sighed.

"Nah, someone else will handle that. Are you okay?" He sounded genuinely concerned and it tugged at my heart.

"I am," I tried to reassure him. The beeping from the cell was notifying me of the voicemail that Sharpay had probably left in a panic thinking I was still asleep and had my phone off the hook or something crazy like that.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive, now go! You'll be late too, then you'll be all mad and blaming me."

"You're right, I would," he said, and I laughed in spite of myself. "There, now I feel better. So when I call you later you'll tell me how you had a fantastic day, and how my wardrobe choice for you was just perfect." I stared at the black spaghetti strap top in my hand that hugged my curves and captured the attention of at least one or two drunken patrons of any bar I wore it to. Well, here goes nothing. "Not Telling…"

"Okay, okay, you win."

"Of course I do." The tone he used with me brought another smile to my lips. "Until later?"

"Until later," I agreed, and hung up the phone only to have it ring right away. I answered it with, "What now?"

"Um, you're LATE!" Sharpay said in her cute little panic.

"I was looking for something to wear," I admitted.

"Just hurry, hurry, hurry! Come on, it's Troy Day!"

"Um, about that…"

"You're not backing out of the mission, so just get your ass over here."

Since I figured there was no sense arguing with her, I simply agreed and promised I would be leaving my house in less than ten minutes. As I walked over to my computer to turn it off, I heard that familiar voice sending shivers down my spine. I stood there by the speakers, hanging on every word, realizing just how much I related to it completely. After the song was done, I shut my computer down, grabbed my bags, and left, Troy's words hanging in the air…


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER SIX**

"Dancing… on the bar," I repeated for about the thousandth time, still with the same incredulous tone. Kelsi, Taylor, and Moira were still in tears from laughing so much as Sharpay and I stood there gaping at them.

"Seriously! It's on TMZ!" Kelsi finally was able to say as she ran to the computer and pulled up the website.

"It has to be on You Tube by now too," Taylor said, wiping a tear from her eye.

"So, Troy and his brother…"

"Damn, we should have gone up to Cleveland last night!" Sharpay exclaimed with a giggle. "I mean, except for your migraine, Gabi."

"Sorry," I muttered, moving slowly towards the computer. Sure enough, there the Bolton brothers were having the time of their lives dancing on top of the bar much to the delight of the patrons and the lone cell phone video recorder who probably was paid a pretty penny for the evidence.

"Oh hell, to be THAT girl!" Sharpay giggled as we saw a beautiful blonde reach up and stuff money into both Troy and Josh's waistline of their jeans. I covered my mouth with my hand to stifle the laughter, but it just didn't work. Soon I was howling with laughter right along with the two brothers on the tape that were toasting each other's success as the video ended.

'Not John, you so needed that,' I thought to myself, my face buried in the crook of my arm as I crouched on the floor giggling uncontrollably.

"C'mon, Late Girl, we need to get your bags in the back of Kelsi's car," Sharpay was saying to me, but I simply held up my hand signaling that I needed another minute to compose myself before I could even move. You know those fits of laughter; the ones where you're laughing so hard that suddenly there's no sound coming out and it hurts because you can't breathe. Yeah, this was like that.

"It's a shame we missed it," I heard Kelsi say as I tried to gather my senses.

"Nah, actually this works to our advantage," Taylor disagreed.

"How so?" I was finally able to ask through gasps of air as I stood up and wiped my eyes.

"Helloooo ladies, what's gonna happen tonight?" she continued.

"Uh, the concert Mom," Moira piped up.

"Yes, and since this is now all over the place, management is gonna wanna do damage control, meaning the Bolton brothers are gonna be…"

"Grounded?" Moira asked, an eyebrow up.

"In a sense yes," Taylor replied, her eyebrow also raised. Oh, crap, there went her mind into overdrive. Whenever that happened it normally resulted in us either achieving even more than we had set out to do or getting into massive amounts of trouble.

"Who's gonna lay bets?" Kelsi asked, her eyebrow also raised.

"On what?" Moira asked excitedly, not quite grasping what was bound to happen this evening.

"On Troy being in the same hotel," I answered, my voice barely audible.

I wish I could say I got sleep on the way to Cleveland like I had planned. Alas, the majority of the trip was spent laughing at different intervals about the video that we had seen, and discussing the amusing thread that had already popped up on about it. I knew we'd be in Cleveland with plenty of time for me to rest before the evening's festivities, so I wasn't exactly worried about it.

After we were properly checked in, we entered our huge double king-size bed suite on the 34th floor with the oversized couch that Moira put first dibs on. We agreed since she'd probably be asleep long before the rest of us who no doubt would be in the bedroom rehashing every detail of the evening we could conjure up.

I checked my appearance in the mirror and grimaced as I noted the obvious lack of sleep. My hair was up in a messy bun with curls falling haphazardly around my face, I was wearing minimal makeup, and had my sunglasses still on as any light felt it was piercing my head. I had on my comfy travel pants that clung to my hips and accentuated my… assets, for lack of better word, a shirt that clung a little tighter in the chest area than I was comfortable with, and my slip on tennis shoes.

I was going through my travel bag searching futilely for the bottle of Excedrin Migraine that I know was on my night stand by my bed at home. "Hey, I need to run down to the little shop downstairs," I said, grabbing my purse and a keycard to the room. "Do you need anything?"

"Troy Bolton with nothing but a red bow on his head and a smile?" Sharpay suggested, and the rest of the older girls quickly agreed.

"Ha ha, very funny. "

After the rest of the group had insisted they needed nothing, I made my way down to the first floor to their little convenience store they had down by the check-in desk. I was perusing their row of overpriced medications praying that they carried the only over the counter pain reliever that could touch my migraines, unconsciously rubbing my temple.

I sensed his presence before I saw or heard him. It was one of those moments that Taylor always described but I had never quite experienced; the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up and I felt the tell-tale tingle run down my spine just before I saw one of the most perfectly shaped male hands reach around me and pull a bottle of Excedrin Migraine medication off the counter. He held it out to me and spoke softly, as if to keep others from hearing.

"A friend told me this stuff works wonders."

Damned if my body didn't betray me as goose bumps covered my arms. How many nights had I dreamed of feeling his words on my skin, and here he was. Say something, Gabriella! Anything!

"Are you cold?" he asked.

"No," I admitted, keeping my voice just as low. I shyly took the bottle from him and turned slightly to see him standing directly beside me holding about four 20-ounce bottles of Dr. Pepper.

"Oh, this? An addiction. Stay away from it, it's hell to try to break." There was that damn grin! Oh hell, why did I have to wear a shirt this tight? I crossed my arms in front of me self-consciously.

Why was his smile so infectious? I found myself smiling back at him, all of our conversations replaying in my mind as he proceeded to tell me about how I should get some Diet Pepsi, if I liked it, because his friend had stated that the two of them together was the real trick.

His friend.

Me.

My heart warmed as the realization washed over me; he was talking to someone who he thought of as a stranger about… me. As his friend.

Just as quickly I was reminded why I couldn't tell him who I was when a group of three well dressed, perfectly groomed and manicured Barbie dolls came up to him and asked him for autographs. He graciously agreed to sign and take pictures and I took it as my cue to make my purchase and retreat to my room where I could decide whether to glow or cry.

"Hey," he called out to me as I walked up to the counter, and I turned to him. "Are you okay?" Without even thinking about it, I smiled and answered as I always did.

"I'm fine, don't worry about me."

He blinked a couple times as I realized the error of my ways, but luckily he was busy with the growing group of fans. As quickly as I could, I paid for my provisions and escaped up to the safety of my room.

"How's the shop downstairs?"

"I hate you, you know that?" I said offhandedly to Taylor as I walked in, damning my eyes, damning that migraine, wishing I could have at least been dressed nice or something.

"Was that directed at me or yourself?" she asked with a laugh. My sunglasses hid the tears in my eyes as I turned to her.

"Congratulations, you picked the right hotel," I replied, biting the inside of my lower lip to keep it from trembling. As the rest of the girls began celebrating, I took my medicine, ignoring my buzzing phone beside the bed. I knew it was him. I knew it with every bone in my aching body, but as per always I let my insecurities rule my life.

"Hey, Gabi," Kelsi said as she poked her head into the room, "are you gonna get some rest? We were gonna do sight-seeing first before the show."

"I just need some sleep," I answered honestly. 'Sleep and time to reflect and make some decisions.' The phone started buzzing again.

"Looks like you need to answer your phone, too," she observed.

"Later," I said with a sigh.

I should have answered that phone. I should have told him that yes, it was me. Then again, hindsight is always 20/20.


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

As if a prayer had been answered, my migraine was miraculously gone when I woke to get ready for the concert. After I showered and finished my make up and hair, I put on the jeans that for some reason fit just right that day and pulled that curve accentuating black tank top over my head. I pulled on my favorite black boots and stood there surveying what had to be a stranger in the mirror.

"Hey Gabi, are you about…whoa," Sharpay stopped short as she looked at me. "Wow."

"I don't get it," I was muttering softly.

"You look perfect!" she exclaimed, causing me to blush as I heard Troy's words come back to me: _'…just grab something, say 'fuck it,' and go. It will be perfect, trust me.'_

"But, but… our rule! I never have a great night unless my hair looks like shit!" I said in a panic. Yeah, I was more than a little superstitious that night.

Sharpay replied with a laugh and drug me out to the living-area of the suite. "She says we can't go unless her hair looks like shit," she said to the rest of the girls.

"Oh, it's horrible," Kelsi spoke up, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

"Disgusting," Taylor agreed. I had to at least give her points for briefly keeping a straight face.

"No it doesn't, it's… oh!" Moira finally caught on when Taylor nudged her. "It's so gross, why don't you try to fix it?"

"Wow, something is in the air, isn't it?" Taylor remarked, standing up and reaching for her leather jacket.

I actually had to agree with her. Everything about that night was just the way you would picture it to be. The air was crisp and kind of cool so we didn't have to worry about lilting hair or makeup that had disappeared from sweat, there was a certain vibe that we all collectively felt, and I was ready to throw caution to the wind.

Almost.

I lost my nerve about the time my phone started buzzing and without even checking caller i.d., I answered with a very cheerful, "Ello, ello!"

"So your migraine's gone, then?" Troy's voice warmed me from head to toe.

"Oh yeah, cocktail works every time." I automatically started biting my lip from nervousness and Kelsi gave me a puzzled look.

"Since when have you been nervous talking to Not John?" she asked, loud enough for Troy to hear.

"Ah… I see," I heard him say.

"Girls Night," I covered with a grin. "What can I say?"

"Well, I have a few questions for you to start with." His voice had a sweet lift to it. Oh crap, here we go.

"Like what?" I tried to cover with a nervous laugh. As he began to speak, our very dear, sweet Moira, at her mother's urging, grabbed the phone from my hands and put it up to her ear. "HEY!" I exclaimed as I grabbed the phone away from her, her stunned face showing me she caught on so much quicker than I did. "Sorry about that, what were you saying?"

We had come to a stop since Moira was just standing there, staring at me like I was from outer space. Taylor was trying to pry information from her as Troy asked very sweetly, "Have you checked your messages?"

"No, no I haven't. Oh! They're on my home phone, I had the calls forwarded here but the messages stay there."

"Can you check them?"

"Yes, but not while I'm on the phone with you."

"Alright, Smart Ass. Just do it, ok? I'll talk to you later." He hung up the phone as if to try to cover that sound check was starting in the background. 'HA!' I thought to myself, 'I already know who you are!' As I put the phone back into my pocket I turned to find four pairs of stunned eyes looking at me.

"Gabi, there's something I think you need to know," Moira said slowly. I opened my mouth to ask them what it was, then decided against it. I suck at lying, hardcore.

"I know, I know, it's Troy, but don't ANY of you say ANYthing, not even to him, got it?"

Yeah. That was gonna go over REAL well.

I was still arguing with them when we found our seats, third row a little left of center to the stage. I hadn't realized just how close we were going to be, which caused me to go into sheer panic mode.

"So does he know?" Kelsi was asking for about the millionth time in the past five minutes.

"I'm not sure," I answered honestly. "I can't get to my messages! It says my code is incorrect, I know it's not. There's no way I'd forget my code."

"Like there's no way you'd forget your keys," Taylor piped up.

"Or your purse," Sharpay added.

"Or to tell all of us you were talking to Troy Bolton," Moira had to add, still glaring at me. "Geez, if I coulda had some kind of warning…"

"So you honestly didn't know, all that time?" Taylor asked again as we sat down, me motioning Moira not to say that information quite so loud.

"Not until yesterday. Damn! What the hell could that code be?" I put my cell phone down in my lap and bit my bottom lip, trying my best to recollect exactly what four numbers I had put together so I would never forget them.

"Why didn't you tell us, though?" Kelsi asked, and I sighed.

"Because… because he's Troy Bolton, that's why."

"Oh, that makes a whole lot of sense that's… not." Kelsi never strayed from speaking her mind.

"Don't you guys get it?"

"Excuse me, ma'am," a young man with a yellow vest on interrupted our conversation.

"Ma'am? Oh great, now my night's shot to hell," I muttered, which made him laugh nervously.

"I was asked to find out if your headache had gone away."

Oh, well, that was simple enough. "Yes," I replied, then turned back to the girls who were gaping at me, their mouths hung open. "Anyhow, as I was saying…"

"He so knows!" Kelsi exclaimed.

"He can't know it was me, he just knows that I was in the shop and had a headache, that's all. And, as I was saying, he can't know…"

"Ma'am?" The kid was back. I kept from shuddering at what was supposed to be a sign of respect and turned back to him.

"I was asked to find out what…area code you're from?"

"937," I responded without thinking, and as he quickly walked back around the curtain I turned back to the girls.

"He's so behind that curtain telling this kid what to say, he knows who you are, and you would be an absolute freakin idiot to not tell him!" Taylor exclaimed.

"But you don't get it!" I implored them to listen to my reasoning. "He's Troy Bolton! Troy Bolton! He can have any woman he wants, he's not going to want me, and pardon me for being selfish but I would like to at least keep talking to him so that…"

"Ma'am, I'm truly sorry."

"Is he grounded or something?" Moira asked.

"Pardon me ma'am… er, miss,"

"Oh, she's a 'miss' and I'm a 'ma'am'. Great."

"No disrespect meant, ma'am."

"Of course not," I said with a smile, and Moira tapped him on his shoulder to regain his attention.

"Is he grounded?" she continued.

"I… don't think so, miss, I'm fairly certain he's too old to be. But…I was asked," he turned back to me, "what's your name?"

"Gabriella," I replied, and he scrambled back around the curtain.

"He wants to know, you should tell him!" Sharpay exclaimed.

"I'm not ready for him to know."

"Well like it or not, Ms Not Telling, I guarantee he's going to find out tonight," Kelsi stated matter-of-factly.

"How?" I asked, using my hands for emphasis. "Oh, what now?" I said to the tapping on my shoulder and turned to find the young man with the yellow vest again. "I'm… sorry, can I help you?"

"Yes, um… no, he's not grounded," he said to Moira, "and… I was asked to clarify… what's you're middle name?"

"Elizabeth," I lied quickly and loudly to drown out everyone else's answers. They each glared at me as the young man scrambled back to the backstage area quickly as to avoid other girls screaming their requests at him, the loudest being from Moira.

"He is TOO grounded!"

"How could you say that?" Sharpay asked me incredulously.

"Because…would you guys keep your voices down? Because I don't want him to know, I'm not ready for him to know."

"When he finds out,"

"No, he's not going to!" I stopped Kelsi from continuing. "Guys, please."

"When he finds out," she ignored my ramblings, "it's not going to be from us, it's going to be from you. Right, girls?" I relaxed slightly as everyone agreed when suddenly the air was filled with ear-splitting screams and Troy peaked his head around the curtain.

"I'm so not grounded!" he yelled in our general direction.

"Then prove it! Come out and play!" Taylor yelled back. There was a double meaning to her words that Troy seemed to pick up on. He smiled that cocky little half smile of his before he replied.

"Alright then, you're on!"


	8. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

"I have no voice," I was attempting to say as I grabbed a Diet Pepsi from the convenience store in the lobby.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Taylor teased, then winked at me when I shot her a mean look.

"Guess you got your out," Sharpay said with a sigh.

"Oh hell no!" My voice was barely above a whisper and it gave a kind of squeak when I said it. I was turning to tell them that since Troy thought my middle name was Elizabeth and I had absolutely no voice whatsoever, it would be perfect; however, my thoughts flew straight out the window as Troy and Ryan sauntered in, baseball caps pulled down low.

"What's up with Squeaky over here?" Troy motioned my way, giving me a little wink. My heart skipped a tiny beat, but without anything to give me away I felt more empowered than I had earlier.

"It's all your fault," I said, although it was nearly inaudible and he put a hand to his ear.

"What was that?" he teased, and I even though I laughed barely any sound was coming out. He reached over and playfully tousled my hair as if we'd known each other forever and turned to the rest of the girls.

"Ok, Mr. Hot Stuff, where are we going?" Moira asked, her hands on her hips. She was a feisty one, even for thirteen.

"Ooohhh, about that," Ryan started, then laughed slightly. "Funny thing…"

"Yeah, I was told I need to lay low after last night, thanks Ryan."

"Hey, you called me!" Ryan interrupted him.

"So, you're grounded," Moira stated.

"Noooooo," Ryan disagreed.

"Right, no, we have to… lay low," Troy reiterated.

"You're… GROUNDED," Moira said, pointing at the both of them.

"We're just…" Troy was attempting to use his hands to gesture something, but it seemed no words were coming to him.

"Grounded," all of us girls said at once.

"Oh, shut up," Troy replied jokingly. "Come on, damnit, penthouse suite." He motioned with his arm for all of us to follow. "You too, Squeaky." He placed his arm around me and drug me towards the front of the store, taking the Diet Pepsi out of my hand and placing it on a shelf. "I have plenty of stuff up there." I have no idea how I kept my face from flaming bright red at the thoughts that ran through my mind at his offhanded comment. Then again, I have no idea how the five of us girls managed to act as if we'd known the Bolton brothers our whole lives as we walked past the many hotel patrons towards the private elevators.

The music was playing softly in the background while over two dozen people milled about the penthouse suite. Huddled in the corner along the table by the large sectional sofa were the seven of us, with the final two opponents in the midst of a candy-or-death battle.

Troy was sitting to my right staring intently at the cards in his hand, occasionally glancing over them to size up the competition. Looking back down at his cards again, he lowered them slightly, and then leaned forward.

"Do you have any threes?"

"Go fish," Moira replied, grinning smugly.

"Damnit," Troy muttered, and he picked up another card from the table. I noticed that he drew the three, but winked at me as he shook his head and stuck it in with the cards in his hand. "I'm going to be beaten by a thirteen year old!"

"Thirteen and a half," she corrected him, and I stifled a giggle.

"Because the half is so important," Taylor said with a roll of her eyes.

I glanced around the penthouse occasionally, noting that most of the other people in the suite were merely schmoozing or doing business, completely ignoring us. Occasionally someone would come by to make sure our glasses were never more than half empty, but they didn't even seem to acknowledge our presence.

I stole a sideways glance at Troy wondering briefly just how lonely it must be to have to live this way. As if on cue, he glanced over and our eyes met. I could have looked away, maybe I should have, but instead I smiled softly. The corner of his mouth lifted in his famous half smile as we seemed to get lost in the message we were conveying to one another. "You remind me of someone," he said softly, leaning into me, and without even thinking I reached out and kissed the scruff on his cheek. Even in my alcohol-induced haze I was saying to myself 'Now's the time to tell him…'

About then, he accidentally let his hand tip back and Moira saw the row of threes.

"You've got to be KIDDING me!" she exclaimed, shaking her head in disbelief. "Oh, come ON, you chicken!" The laughter was infectious and Moira quickly gathered up all of the candy. "All of you can eat my dust. You really wanna play cards? Let's play some poker, I'll so beat every last one of you!"

"It's almost one in the morning," Taylor said to her daughter. "I think it's about time to wrap this up and get you home, or to the hotel suite, or wherever."

"Ah shit, I gotta get going," Ryan said, standing up and rubbing his eyes. "Dude, I'm sorry…"

"Ah, don't sweat it," Troy said to him as he stood up for them to say their goodbyes. I sat down on the big comfortable couch, sinking back into the cushions, not wanting to leave just yet. I knew by glancing at the clock exactly what time was coming; everyone would take his or her leave and Troy would be in this big suite, alone. I knew this because that's when he would call me, pouring his heart out without truly saying what was going on.

Troy walked back over as the rest of the girls were cleaning up their collective mess of cups and bottles. "Nah, don't worry about it," he was saying, "there's…well, someone will get it." I knew that tone, that masking how he truly felt tone that he used so often on the phone with me. "Hey, Squeaky, what about you? How are you doing?"

"I'm good."

"Do you need any tea?" I scrunched up my nose at the thought since I found tea one of the most repulsive things on the face of this Earth. "Nah, nonsense, I'll get you some apple cinnamon tea, put some honey in it…"

"Can you actually leave to do that?" I teased, my voice slightly back but not even close to what he would notice. The sweet mischievous smile he gave me answered without him saying a word.

"See, if they wont let me out, then they have to go get it." The way he shoved his hands down in his pockets and bounced lightly was so damn adorable that I couldn't resist.

"Ok, you win," I said, returning his smile, the sense of familiarity washing over me. I wondered if he felt it too. How many times had I said exactly the same thing to him, anyhow? He held out his hand to me and I took it, feeling lighter than air as I walked with him hand-in-hand towards the kitchen area of his suite.

"Jackie, my friend needs some tea," he was saying.

"But not real tea, that's…"

"Cruel?" Jackie, the burly man who I'm sure was actually named Jack, piped up.

"No," I attempted to giggle. "It's gross."

"But apparently needed," Jackie said with a smile.

"Apple cinnamon with honey," Troy requested. "Pretty please." He stood behind me, wrapping his arms around me placing his chin on my shoulder, and we both gave Jackie our cheesiest grins.

"What a picture this makes," Jackie commented, "how could I say no? Give me a few minutes."

"Thanks, Jackie, you know how much you rock." Troy's voice directly in my ear was pure heaven, although in my nearly inebriated state I could have chosen a few other phrases for him to mutter against my skin. The thought brought the goose bumps back up on my arms, which he rubbed lightly as if trying to warm me up. "Are you okay? A little cold?"

"Not in the slightest," I admitted, slightly breathless, then bit my lip to keep from saying anything more. I heard him inhale sharply as he turned and brushed his lips against the nape of my neck.

"Please…stop doing that to me," he whispered gently in my ear before letting me go and turning away.

What the hell?

At least that was my first thought, and then reality came crashing through to my lightly intoxicated brain. I turned to find him saying his obligatory good byes to the people who hadn't bothered to even say hello to him all evening, and when he looked up at me he smiled—not the cocky 'you know you want me' smile; this one was genuine, warm, inviting. I had to believe that deep down in his soul he knew exactly who I was.

Now I had to find a way to correct the wrong I had made.

"We have to get going," Taylor finally spoke up. It was almost two in the morning, Moira was dragging, and in spite of our resilience and experience in staying up til dawn the other girls looked tired as well. I, on the other hand, was still benefiting from having a nap in the afternoon and in spite of my lack of voice I wasn't quite ready to go. It didn't help that every time Troy passed by he would reach out and gently touch me—not in a sexual way, either. Sometimes it was just a slight touch on the arm or shoulder, or placing his hand on my back when he leaned around to say good-bye to someone. He had to know what he was doing to me, especially when he would lean in and quietly ask if I was okay or if I needed anything. I was already so wound up by the time the girls were saying they wanted to leave that if he asked me what I needed I would simply tell him to take off his pants.

Turns out I didn't have to.

As the girls were getting ready to leave, Troy was standing beside me, his head tilted slightly to the side, as if he was trying to read my thoughts. He took his time hugging each of them good-bye, thanking them over and over for how much joy that had brought him this evening. When he hugged Moira, he lifted her small frame into the air and squeezed so tight she giggled and said she was being deprived of oxygen. And then, he came to me.

I wasn't ready for the look in his eyes as he took my hands into his. The mixture of hunger and longing caused my pulse to quicken as his eyes seemed to absorb the memory of me into his soul. I lightly ran my fingertips up his arms before I wrapped my arms around his neck to hold him tighter than I'd ever dreamed I would be permitted to. He leaned into the embrace, wrapping his arms around me, whispering one sweet word that would change our paths forever.

"Stay."


	9. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER NINE**

"Try this one," Troy pushed a glass towards me, then he began to work on his next concoction. I took a sip, then a larger drink of it.

"Red Headed Slut," I stated, "I'd know this one anywhere."

"So I'm not being original?" he asked, and I shook my head 'no.' "Okay, well… you guessed that one, so you don't have to remove anything."

"That's not fair!" I squeaked. "I don't know the first thing about mixing drinks!"

"Well, if it's not fair then you would have to take off an article of clothing regardless, now wouldn't you?"

"And what if I guess them all?" I asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Then," he said as he handed me the next sample, this one in a small shot glass, "I will have succeeded at getting you drunk enough to take advantage of you."

Raising an eyebrow at him I said, "Wait… if I guess these, then you have to take an article of clothing off."

"Fair enough," he agreed, slipping one shoe off. "Go ahead, try it."

"One shoe?" I asked, and instead of answering he instead pointed at the shot glass in my hand. "Oh, fine." I took a sip, absolutely loved it, and tossed back the rest of the shot.

"Okay, lush, name it."

"Lush? You're the one that's feeding the alcohol to me," I pointed out. "And… I have no idea."

"One article," he said, and I sighed. I kicked off one of my boots, just as he had done, and grinned at him.

"Are you gonna tell me?" I asked.

"That was a One Night Stand," he teased, and added "Hey!" when I swatted him.

"Who's being cheeky now?" I said with a laugh, and he looked at me curiously.

"Who said anything about being cheeky?"

Oh, crap…see? I should never, ever drink. It was something he had said to me all right, he just didn't know it.

"Troy…"

"Wait a minute," he cut me off, handing me another beautifully colorful drink. "Try that one."

"Troy, this…"

"Please?" How could I resist? I took a sip, letting the liquid glide down the back of my throat.

"Mmmmm, this… this is Heaven," I said, and his smile could have lit up a stadium.

"That's mine," he explained. "I call it The Cookie."

"It tastes like a cookie!" I exclaimed taking another sip. He leaned down placing his elbows on his makeshift bar, resting his chin in his hands.

"Hence the name," he said with a smile. "Gabriella…"

"What?" I asked, the tone of his voice causing a blush to rise to my cheeks.

"One article… give it up." I kicked my second boot off, and wiggled my toes, which seemed grateful to be free. Troy was walking around the makeshift bar towards me, tousling his hair.

"Are you happy now?" I asked.

"Not entirely…this is taking too long." His voice was lower, a rasp to it that hadn't been there before. Now was the time…I had to tell him, I had to…

"Troy,"

"Shut up," he whispered as he cupped my face in his hands. For just a brief moment I thought I should stop him, then all thoughts were chased from my mind as he softly teased my lips with his. His kisses were feather-soft, sweet, searching for intent as he lightly tangled his fingers in my hair. I sighed against his mouth, and as if he sensed an invitation he deepened the kiss, taking his time exploring me, touching me as if I was so fragile I may shatter in his hands.

My hands moved of their own volition, traveling up the front of his shirt to his neck as our kisses began to build with an intensity I wasn't prepared for. All these weeks of wanting to be with my mystery caller, his hands roaming the length of my body just as they were doing now, paled in comparison to reality. I wanted him to know it was me, he had to know, but I found myself unable to speak as his trail of kisses led down my neck, lightly biting just the right spots. My knees were going weak, and when his hands found their way under the hem of my shirt, coming in contact with my skin beneath, I felt as if every nerve ending was on fire.

I was fumbling with the buttons on the front of his shirt when his lips found mine again, our breathing coming in short, heavy gasps. "Is this what you want? Are you sure?" he asked between kisses as he was slowly pushing my top up, again kissing along my neck.

"Yes," I breathed, unable to say much more with his lips on my skin. He pulled back slightly, his eyes troubled as he looked at me. He was studying my face, drinking in every detail as he struggled to get his breathing slowed.

"I'm… I'm sorry," he said softly, removing his hands so slowly I could have sworn he was reluctant to. "I can't…There's just…" He closed his eyes tight and rubbed his temple before he continued. "There's…"

"Someone else?" I asked, trying my damndest to get my heart to stop slamming into my ribcage. He opened his mouth to answer, then closed it again and lowered his head.

"It's… complicated," he finally said, "and I shouldn't have done this to you, or with you, or…" he paused as he took a deep breath. " I don't even know…I'm sorry, it's nothing."

Oh, that was real clear. And I, being the Queen of Denial, never once thought he was speaking about anyone other than a girlfriend, someone he was obviously serious, or somewhat so, with. I felt the heat creep up to my face and almost angrily demanded to know why he had been calling me for the past five weeks, but thought better of it. What the hell difference would it make, now?

"Don't beat yourself up over it," I said instead, with the best smile I could conjure up. "It must be hell being on the road so much."

"You have no idea," he said softly, still looking at the ground, messing with the back of his hair.

'Bet me,' I was screaming in my head. I reached out and took his hand in mine instead, and when he looked up at me I could see the telltale reddening in the corners of his eyes. All traces of anger left my body and I found myself pulling him into a warm, comforting embrace, softly playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. I felt his arms envelop me and his hands were trembling ever so slightly as he returned the embrace, rubbing my back softly. My heart was splintering as he inhaled sharply and squeezed just a little harder before stepping back.

"A little awkward?" he asked.

"You know…I dunno," I admitted. He looked a little sheepish, his shirt half undone, the most adorable grin on his face.

"I wish…" he sighed, his smile fading as he watched me pull the hem of my shirt down. "Something black, it will be perfect," he muttered softly, reaching out to help me.

Why else would he say that if he didn't know? He had to know, and here he was telling me there was someone else…

I grabbed his hands to stop him, his fingers inadvertently brushing against my skin, and again my body betrayed me, the chills spreading all over. Instead of pulling away as perhaps he should have, he released the hem of my shirt, his hands opening wide as he caressed my skin, sliding his fingertips along the small of my back. His eyes filled with hunger as he watched his hands until they disappeared behind me, then slowly…so slow it seemed to last an eternity, his eyes traveled upwards. His breathing became more shallow as his gaze watched my chest rise and fall with each breath I took. He seemed fixated on a spot at the base of my neck where I'm sure my pulse was visible…it had to be, with as hard as my heart was beating.

I closed my eyes briefly wanting to cherish this moment forever. I knew in my heart I would never be the same having known him, having shared so much with him not just this evening in person, but over the weeks. He had brought so much light, so much happiness into my life. If this was it, if this was all I was going to have, if he was going to disappear, I at least had to tell him what he had done for me.

When I opened my eyes, there he was…his intense stare shooting straight through me just as he had done all evening. I opened my mouth to try to say something, but the words failed to come as I gazed into those unimaginably hypnotic eyes. Unable to hold his gaze any longer, I looked slightly lower… oh, bad move, Gabriella. His mouth- his perfect, full, soft lips…the skill he used them with…

I swear we moved at the same time, no pretenses as he pulled me in, my hands holding onto his shirt as our lips met, hearts pounding, tension building to a near-fever pitch when his hands gripped my hips. I whimpered softly, my hands losing themselves in his soft hair, and he responded by pulling me closer, the kiss building to what was sure to be a crescendo…

…Then that damn phone rang.

He growled his frustration, low in his throat, as he ended our kiss and glared in the direction of his cell. "Fuuuuck, I better get this," he said, still breathing heavily. I laughed nervously as I unwrapped myself from his embrace and he held up one finger as if to say 'hold that thought' before he jogged quickly across the room to answer his phone.

I wasn't at all surprised to find that my legs were a little shaky as I walked over to the couch, sinking down into the comfortable cushions. Troy's brow was furrowed in concentration, and he told the person on the other end, "Hold on, just a sec, ok?" He covered the mouthpiece and looked at me. "I have to get this, I'll be right back."

"Okay," I said with a smile. Troy walked quickly back to the bedroom area of the suite, and I lay back on the couch to relax and let everything sink in.

What the hell was I doing?

Okay, obviously I knew what I was doing, but how the holy hell did this happen? Especially when I had been so, so sure that he wouldn't want anything to do with me. And he had said there was someone else! What..the hell… was I doing?

My phone vibrating in my pocket interrupted my thoughts. I giggled softly thinking to myself what that would have been like if Troy were still out here, pressed up against me. I glanced at the unrecognizable number, but seeing that it wasn't a blocked call and not knowing if it was one of the newly transplanted doctors at the hospital where I worked, I answered.

"Hello?" The other end of the phone was completely silent. "Helloooooooo?" I heard a 'click' as the person on the other end of the phone hung up and shrugged. 'Wrong number,' I thought, then giggled in spite of myself.

I heard the door to the bedroom open as Troy walked out slowly. He placed his phone on a random table as he walked towards me where I laid on the couch, his face unreadable. I sat up slowly watching the way he moved towards me, slowly, meticulously, every step causing my pulse to quicken. He reached down, removing my cell phone from my hand, not even glancing as it as he lightly tossed it to the other end of the couch. My breath caught in my throat as I looked up at him, the light illuminating from behind him casting his face in shadows. 'He looks like an angel,' I thought as he moved in closer. 'Just like an angel…with the devil in his eyes.'

He stopped beside me, his expression taut, his eyes shimmering. I noticed a muscle in his jaw twitching and I wondered how long it would take him to tell me it was time for me to leave. 'That had to have been her, the someone else,' I thought, wishing I had left after he'd told me about her the first time. He watched silently as I stood and looked slightly up at him. He looked so troubled, part of me wanted to comfort him, the other part thinking selfishly he should suffer for leading me on.

"I should go," I said, holding my chin up defiantly. His eyes slid shut as I spoke, and when he opened them I could almost swear they were filling with tears.

"Why?" His voice was barely above a whisper, causing my anger to rise.

"Is that a rhetorical question, or do you really want an answer?"

"Oh…alright…" What the hell? How could he act as if I was wounding him when here he was trying to get into my pants, when there was someone else? My eyes blazed with anger, but I decided against having a full-blown argument. I moved to walk past him to get my shoes and phone, but he gently touched my arm, his fingers like five small suns burning into me. I looked back up at him, telling myself over and over 'Don't fall for it, don't fall for it.'

"Gabriella, I just…" he shrugged. "Are you gonna say goodbye?"

That hit me like a sucker punch, and I felt as if all the air had escaped the room. Troy never said goodbye to me. It was always good night, or until later…never goodbye. Damn him, damn him straight to hell for bringing those tears to my eyes…

No…I couldn't say it. I opened my mouth willing the words to come, screaming them from my brain, but..silence. Silence and two large tears that spilled over my lashes. He reached up as if instinctively, cupping my face with his palms, brushing the tears away with his thumbs. I tried willing the tears to stop, but the effort was futile as I looked into his eyes. I didn't want to walk away, I didn't want to lose my confidante, I hadn't wanted to admit how much I had come to depend on him.

"Why the tears, then?" His question seemed so out of place, but I didn't have time to answer as he leaned in to gently kiss my lips. This was meant to be his goodbye, it had to be…

Our bodies decided otherwise as all friendliness fled from our touches and piece by piece our clothing was discarded across the floor. He threw that black tank top that had worked so well for me across the room and made short work of my bra as we fell back into the couch touching, kissing every where that we could. He shrugged out of this shirt that I had finally managed to unbutton as we turned and I ended on top of him, straddling him precariously as I nipped at his neck while unbuttoning his jeans. He moaned softly when I reached down into the fabric, touching him intimately for the first of many times that night. Turning as one, cushions coming with us, we were on the floor as he finished kicking off the remainder of his clothing and urgently began to undo my jeans. I gasped as he yanked them down, tossing them to the side, and stared at me like a hunter studying his prey.

Watching him kiss his way up the inner part of my thigh, then slowly pull down my black lace panties with his teeth, was my complete undoing. I could feel my back arch as he left no mistake exactly how trite that Minnesota law was, and as I whimpered softly afterwards he kissed his way up my body, to the base of my neck, latching onto that sensitive spot where my pulse was still throbbing.

He was pressed up against me, our legs entwined, a thin sheen of sweat covering us both when I heard his voice, his words spoken up against my lips. "Open your eyes." It was an effort, they felt so heavy…but I did as he asked, wondering if mine were as bright as his at that moment. He reached up and held my hand, never losing eye contact, and with one swift movement I was in pure ecstasy.

Time had no meaning for either of us; phones had been discarded, couches in disarray, tables were toppled over…all that mattered was each other, the pleasure being given and received, the intimacy that it seemed we both craved. As the early morning rays of sunrise began to peak through the heavy curtains, we finally drifted off to sleep, and I damned my heart for allowing me to fall in love with him.


	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TEN**

I'm not sure when Troy had quietly slipped from the room, but I woke alone in the large bed with the comforter pulled up around my shoulders. I remember quite distinctly that all covers had ended up on the floor and we hadn't bothered to pick them up, and a smile touch my lips as I realized he had to have covered me when he got up.

I stretched with a soft sigh, and then winced as my muscles began screaming at me. Holy hell, it hurt to move! My poor, poor thighs…'Worth it,' I thought, slowly pulling myself to the sitting position.

Out of the corner of my eye I glimpsed what looked like my overnight bag. I blinked, rubbing the sleep from my eyes as they adjusted to the lack of lighting, then fumbled for the switch to the lamp. Sure enough, there were my things. A small note in slanted writing was perched on top.  
_  
Had some stuff to do. Be back soon._

Well, huh… that seemed a little impersonal after the night we just shared. Then again, there was someone else in his life. I guess that's what I asked for, sleeping with a rock star. I would never be someone special, just… next. And yet, I did it anyway, and here I sat alone, my heart taking intermittent turns between soaring and splintering.

I took a long hot shower, trying to wash all reminders of the evening from me, although I was sure it would take awhile for those bite marks between my thighs to fade. I towel dried my hair, letting the curls fall around my face, and barely put on any makeup. I figured now was the best time to make my exit while he was away; if he wanted to be the kind of guy who screwed around on this "someone else" he wouldn't get the satisfaction of even watching my backside as I walked out of his life. A little vindictive, yes…and in the next moment I had to stop the tears from flowing. Walking out on Troy was walking out on Not John.

He deserved better than that.

Even though I had my things gathered together, I had no intentions of leaving this suite without telling him everything. I put my duffle bag on my shoulder and walked out of the bedroom, turning to shut the door.

"You found everything okay?" Troy's voice caused me to jump and screech, holding my heart as I turned around. Damn him for catching me off guard!

"Yes, thank you." My voice had nearly returned to normal, but he showed no sign of surprise as he sat there on the couch, its cushions firmly back in place. He looked as if he'd barely slept at all, the circles under his eyes adding to the morose look on his face. He bit his bottom lip and placed his guitar aside, but he didn't stand; it was as if he was afraid to, or perhaps it hurt him as much as it hurt me. Even the last thought couldn't bring a smile to my face, knowing what I had to do. "Who brought my things?"

"If I'm not mistaken, I believe it was the Poor Disabled Indian Girl."

Wait, we hadn't brought that up last night…

Oh, fuck.

There went my bravado. I sunk down on the couch across from him, keeping eye contact the entire time. Where do I go from there? What do I say?

"Nothing to say? I think that's a first." Oh, his words were biting. Cold. "You couldn't even come up with a better bullshit middle name? Elizabeth? Fucking…Elizabeth? Really? That was harsh, even for you." My eyes closed briefly, remembering all the stories of a lost love who had broken his heart. "Then again," he continued, his tone icy, "it really fits you."

While I knew I deserved his anger, it didn't alleviate the pain it caused. "Are you done?" I asked, keeping my tone steady.

"When did you know?" God, were his eyes red? It had to be from exhaustion. "Just… when?"

"Thursday." Lying was futile at this point, the damage was already done. I couldn't tell if it was a laugh or a sob from him as he covered his eyes for an instant before he regained what little of his composure he was holding onto.

"Thursday," he repeated softly. "And you said nothing. Not on the phone, not in the store, not at the concert…"

Every syllable from him added to the inconceivable guilt I already felt, but I kept my chin held high. "The reasons seem rather moot at this point."

"No..no, they're not, damnit, why?" There was no hiding the hurt in his features, in his voice when he asked, sounding almost like a lost child. "What…what did I do? Why wasn't… why wasn't I worth the truth?"

That...hurt.

"Don't think that," I said quickly. "That's not true."

"No, no… I asked you last night," he leaned forward, a tear escaping and trailing down his face. "I asked you why, and you said 'Is that a rhetorical question'. This time, I want to know."

"You asked why I was leaving,"

"No I didn't, Gabi, and you know better. You said you could get your messages, you had the number, you knew it was me calling."

What? Oh…no, no, no…

"Troy, I couldn't get to my messages…"

"Oh, bullshit." He stood then, turning away from me and running a shaking hand through his hair.

"I couldn't remember my code…"

"Stop."

"I was coming out here to tell you…"

"Stop!" He turned to me, hastily wiping his eyes. "No more lies…please. Just tell me why."

"I'm not lying to you. Not now." I couldn't stop my own tears from forming at this, and not only from shame. I knew I was wrong, but I had to explain it to him. "It was because…" My face turned pink at the thought of what had happened on the very couch where I sat. "Because of…"

"Because of what I do, because of who I am…"

"No, but…" I stopped suddenly, realizing that regardless of the consequences, regardless of obvious error of my ways, he needed to know my exact reasoning. "Ok, yes…but not the way you are thinking right now."

"How very presumptuous of you; you obviously don't know me at all."

"You asked for a reason, I'm trying to tell you." His glare could have brought me to my knees, but I continued. "I…thought that if you knew this was me…this…" I emphasized the word by pointing at my less-than-perfect body, "was me, the person you'd been talking to that you wouldn't…" The blush crept over my entire body as I saw a small mark on the side of his neck, proving I had been wrong.

"Nice opinion you have of me; remind me to return the compliment some day."

"Does it make you feel better, Troy? To talk to me this way?"

"Don't turn this around on me."

"No, let's hear it from you, Troy, when did you know?" I stood up, walking over to him.

"The message was very fucking clear, Gabriella."

"I didn't get the message, how many times do I have to tell you?" I winced as he backed away from me. "Okay, now your reasons. Why."

"Why what?" he snapped, tears still clinging to his lashes.

"Why did you sleep…no, you haven't slept yet…" He stepped back again as I reached to brush a strand of hair out of his eyes. "Why did you have sex with me?" The muscle in his jaw twitched again. "Couldn't very well call it making love, could you? So come on, let's hear it."

"Did you come up here expecting to be treated like an object?" he asked, his voice breaking slightly. "That's what you came up here for?" It was still worded as a question, and I shook my head no.

"But you slept with me knowing…that there was someone else," I continued.

"Someone else," he repeated, then let out a short laugh. "Wow, that's… nice."

"You said it, damnit, not me!" I couldn't help my voice from rising, my finger pointed directly at him. "You said…"

"I was talking about YOU!" His admission left me speechless, a trembling mess wanting so badly to reach out to him. "Stop playing the innocent victim who had no fucking clue how I felt, Gabriella." For such a biting tone, his expression just didn't match.

"I wouldn't know; I told you…"

"Why did you, Gabi? Why did you…have sex with me?" his voice was soft now, his eyes searching for answers in my face.

"I wanted to." It sounded so trite now, but I couldn't lie to him anymore.

"Troy the rock star," the bitterness was still there, but it was as if he couldn't put forth the effort to try to hurt me anymore.

"No…no, that's not true,"

"It's ok, Gabriella, I'm used to it now," he said, a thin smile through his tears. "I just thought you were different, and that if you knew me…knew…me first, then you could accept the rest. And I thought you would, but…I was wrong." He shrugged sadly, brushing off my hand as I placed it on his arm.

"You weren't…"

"You," he interrupted me again. "You were the one crazy thing in this whole fucked up ride that…made some sort of sense, and I looked forward to sharing everything with you, and I thought maybe it was that way for you, too," he ended, his voice trailing off as he finally brought his gaze back to me.

"It is," I tried to say, but he shut his eyes, shaking his head slowly.

"You don't have to pretend anymore, I promise," he said, trying to smile at me. He reached out and caught one of my tears with his fingertips. "Gabriella…Christine. Absolutely beautiful." I couldn't hold back the tiny sob that escaped me when he stepped forward and took me into his arms. He wasn't warm or inviting as he had been, and even wrapped in his embrace I could feel him holding himself back. "I guess this is it."

My heart seemed to stop dead in its tracks. No, no, no, no…

"It doesn't have to…"

"I can't go back," he stated as I felt a tear fall. He shrugged again as he stepped back, both of us visibly shaken by these turn of events. I looked up at him as he seemed to struggle with his next words asking myself over and over 'What have I done?', but the answer was as obvious as the disappointment etched in his features.

"I can't say it," he admitted, stepping even further away… he was trying to tell me goodbye, I knew it. "I can't fucking say it." He inhaled sharply, closing his eyes, maybe to regain his self-control.

"Don't say it," I begged him, my voice thick with emotion. "Just…don't say it."

"Gabi…" I reached up and covered his full, perfect mouth with my fingertips.

"Until later," I said, my eyes pleading with him to say the same. A strange sensation flooded over me as I almost swore he lightly kissed my fingertips before moving them away. He stood there silent for a brief moment before turning away and walking back towards the couch, away from me, away from everything I had completely fucked up.

Without another word I grabbed my duffle bag and walked out the door.


	11. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

"So… he knows?" Kelsi was asking, a twinkle in her eyes. "Awwwww…how sweet, you cried when you said goodbye…"

God, she had no clue. I didn't return her hug, I felt so dead inside. 'We didn't say goodbye,' I wanted to say, but my heart knew that's exactly what he'd wanted to do.

"Hey, Not Telling." I could have jumped out of my skin when Ryan peaked his head around the corner.

"What…"

"Yeah… I missed my plane," Ryan said with a sheepish grin, and I noticed a faint blush on Kelsi's cheeks. "But…" he walked up to me and gave me a one-armed hug, holding his coffee out with the other arm so he wouldn't spill it. "Dork, you didn't have to be so shy; he's crazy about you."

I choked back a sob and stepped away from him to the "Awwww"s from the girls, who so didn't understand. He hated me; the more I looked back on the evening past the time of the phone call, when all inhibitions went out the window, when we tore into each other with abandonment…there was no gentleness. He was…angry. The whole night he must have been pouring all of his frustrations and anger into me…

"…better get my phone turned on, he's probably as much of a hot mess as you," Ryan's voice broke into my thoughts.

"You're about to miss another plane," Sharpay said, handing him a piece of paper, probably full of phone numbers and addresses.

"Gotta go…nice meeting all of you." 'What a gentleman, their mother raised them right.' I thought, then immediately blushed as I thought his mother would probably frown upon last night.

"Speaking of going," Taylor was saying as she grabbed her stuff, "are we all checked out? We have to get back."

"Done!" Kelsi replied with a huge smile. "Moira ready too?"

"Moira's sleeping on the way back," she spoke of herself in the third person.

"Gabi's joining you," I muttered.

"I bet," Ryan joked with a wink just before Kelsi walked him out. Should I speak up and let him know how much his brother thought I needed to go straight to hell? Nah, no point. I felt I was in living hell right then anyhow.

I slept most of the way home, promising the girls a full update, although I was sure it wouldn't come from me. I was so overwhelmed with guilt that I could barely look any of them in the eye, but I had the previous night as an excuse to escape quickly to the solitude of my apartment, so uninviting compared to how I felt before.

Even without Troy having physically there, memories of him were everywhere, clinging to my skin the way he had with his own hands mere hours before. I walked over towards my papasan chair, stopping short as I remembered the morning I'd sent a hug to him over the phone. No, I couldn't sit there, not yet. I turned to my couch, a tear threatening as I remembered stretching out there as we had a long involved conversation about a person traveling with him. _'He's Alfred to my Batman,' _he had said with the sweetest laugh.

"Jackie," I said out loud to the empty, echoing room, and had to smile. Jack, or Jackie as Troy had called him, had to be Alfred, and since I had once imagined this person old, graying, proper, stuffy… having now met Jackie, I had to laugh.

But I had no one to laugh with this time.

Next to the couch was my answering machine, the fancy one I'd bought so that as long as I knew the code I could get my messages on the road. Lucky for me at home I could just push the button. A large number "4" was blinking at me, taunting me of what was on the other end. Too weary to deal with any more heartache, I curled up on the couch beside that answering machine and tried to cry the 'what-ifs' away.

For the next four days I stayed in denial land, not answering the phone, not checking messages. I went to work, came home, and spent most of my time there curled up watching TV or sleeping my lack-of-life away. I didn't tell Sharon what had happened, even though I know she had seen the change in me.

I was flipping through the channels cursing the lack of decent programming and was considering pulling out my Greys Anatomy DVDs when my phone rang for about the millionth time. I glanced at the caller I.D., hoping for a miracle; instead, I saw the hospital's number and again damned my romantic heart. When I answered, I expected it to be someone calling me in or asking about a chart. Instead it was my sister Lisa.

"Gabriella, we've been trying to reach you," she was saying, her voice sounding exasperated. "We're at the hospital with mother."

"Mom?!" I asked, sitting up abruptly. "What happened?"

"It's her heart."

I think I broke all speeding laws driving to the hospital, giving the night nurse the look that could kill when she attempted to inform me that visitors' hours were over. When I walked into my mom's quiet room she was sleeping peacefully, the machines…so many machines, and I knew what each of them were for, and how serious the situation must be. I sat beside her and leaned against her bed rail, reaching in and touching her soft hand.

"Gabriella?" she asked without opening her eyes.

"How'd you know it was me?" I asked, sniffling back my tears.

"Your hands are always so soft…so soft and so warm."

"Guess that means I have a cold heart?" I asked, squeezing her hand just a little.

"No, don't be silly," she barely opened her eyes and smiled that warm, loving mom smile. It was the first warmth I'd felt in days. "You're the one exception to that rule that I know of."

"I can actually disagree with you on that one, Mom," I said, a tear falling to her pillow.

"Nonsense." She looked so, so very tired. "Just ask that Not John of yours; I'm sure any lonely soul reaching out knows when a heart is warm." I blinked a couple of times, not knowing what quite to say. "Did you really think I was that naïve? Enough of that now, we'll talk more tomorrow. Then you can apologize profusely for everything you did in my bedroom as a teenager." She patted my hand as I laughed for the first time in days.

"I love you, Mom," was all I could say. I leaned in to kiss her cheek softly, and promised I would be back in the morning.

I was so reluctant to leave, standing outside her door watching the monitors through the small glass window. I remembered back to my childhood, running to her in tears, begging for her to take all my troubles away, cursing myself for growing so distant.

"Gabriella?" Dr. Craig, the new hotshot cardiologist, was saying as he walked up to me. He held out his hand and I shook it, not really giving a damn if he was trying to impress me as he had the reputation for doing with most of the nurses. "I'm taking the best possible care of your mother. She's stable, resting comfortably. You should probably…"

"…go home, get some rest, and let us do our jobs. Oh, and I can come see her in the morning, right Dr. Craig?" I turned to him then, an eyebrow raised. "Did you forget for a moment that I know what's going on?" I jotted down my home phone number on a notepad I always kept with me. "This is my number, I don't care how insignificant the change, you call me."

He glanced down at it, commenting on how our numbers were only a couple digits apart. After I rolled my eyes he finally reassured me that he would personally call me if anything changed. One last glance at my mom, so sure of herself when she'd said those words about Not John, and I knew what I had to do.

That didn't mean I went straight for the answering machine as soon as I got home.

No, first, I needed ice cream. A pint of it. Mint chocolate chip, because he told me I should try it some time. And a pillow, and my jammies. Then, I curled up beside the machine, my finger lingering above the button for a brief moment before quickly pressing it and settling back into the couch to listen.

My heart was pounding before message one ever played, and when the voice of some computer telemarketing device came through the small speaker I muttered, "Oh, shut up," and hit the skip button.

"Hi…um…Not Telling…Christine. I know this is your voicemail or answering machine or whatever because I recognized your voice and even though you didn't give your name, I know the phone number you recited, and wow," he was speaking so fast, he sounded so happy…my heart longed to hear that lift in his voice just one last time. "You know, I really wish you'd answered your phone because…well, because…I think I just saw you."

'This must have been after the store,' I thought, smiling through my tears as I took a bite of mint chocolate chip ice cream. 'I should have told him then.'

"Just…now, here at this hotel that I'm at, I swear it was you. I just…" he paused, and now having met him face to face I could almost see him doing hand gestures trying to relay his message. "I just…felt like it was you. And, um…if it was, I…well, I'm the…I'm the asshole that handed the Excedrin Migraine to you and didn't run after you to ask if I had honestly been that lucky. Oh, fuck, that was cheesy, but damnit…that's what you do to me. I swear…" He paused again, giving me a moment to wipe another tear away and reach for a tissue. "But, if it wasn't you, then there's something you need to know.

"See, I'm on the road right now, but you knew that… I'm on tour. This is me, Not John…and my real name is Troy. Troy Bolton. And I swear I'm not lying, and…and, please tell me you're not the type of person that would matter to." I sobbed at his words as he continued on. "I just…feel like you know me, we know each other, and it wouldn't matter, and I guess I'm trying to find out if I was wrong."

I set the ice cream aside, sick to my stomach, wishing for just one moment I could turn the clock back.

"So…this is my number…" I mouthed the numbers by heart as I'd memorized them on the way back from Phoenix, staring at it in my call history. "And this is just me asking you to call. No more pretending." My heart felt as if it was going to come out of my chest, remembering some of his last words to me,_ 'You don't have to pretend anymore, I promise.'_

"I'd ask if you wanted to do something after the show, but…if you've seen any of the gossip shows or whatever, you kinda know what me and Ryan did…you know, I think I'm kinda grounded for the next few days." I laughed through my tears at that one, then paused reflectively, remembering Moira's question for him. "Not that I would tell Ryan, because he'll never let me live it down. But I can tell you…"

The beep showed where my answering machine had decided to cut him off, leaving me sobbing quietly on the couch as the next message started to play.

"Damn, I hate it when that happens!" I laughed as Troy's voice filled my empty heart once more. "Stupid machines, that's why you should answer your phone! Except either you're sleeping, or busy, or it wasn't you in the store…or it was and you're avoiding me." Even though he said it with a laugh, it still brought another onslaught of tears. "But, yeah…I have so much to do before tonight's show. I hope you're there."

"I was," I said to the stupid machine that I couldn't remember the stupid code to.

"And…if not, I'm in Phoenix Saturday and Sunday too, before I leave. Ryan has to leave tomorrow; we'll have time, just you and me…if you want. And then you can tell me that I'm absolutely crazy, and I can say that no…I'm just crazy about you. So, there. There you go, Ms Not Telling Christine. Until later." Then with the click of the phone, he was gone.

I hit the stop button to gather my senses, letting everything sink in. I had deserved every cruel, hateful word he had sent my way, but I had to explain it to him, somehow. I just felt clueless how to fix it.

Brushing my tears away with sheer determination in my brain, I knew it was time for reinforcements, although I wasn't so sure how they would feel about me at this point. I know Taylor and Kelsi had tried to call several times, and I'm sure some of the accumulating messages that I had yet to listen to were from them; if Sharpay actually had given Ryan a list of phone numbers, I was also sure they knew exactly what I had done to his brother and how I deserved anything Troy threw at me and then some.

Only one way to find out.

I hit play again for the rest of the messages, the next one being some kind of mumbled failed attempt at me trying to get to my messages since I couldn't remember my code. I laughed bitterly at how fate had decided to screw me once more before reminding myself that no, I had done this.

I walked to my kitchen, the answering machine still going. The next one was from Taylor asking if I was okay, because something seemed a little off to her. Then there was Kelsi, and I could tell from her voice that she was more than a little concerned. 'She'd talked to Ryan by then,' I guessed, wiping up a mess on my counter. 'At least she doesn't sound like she hates me.'

There were at least two more from each of them along with various so-important-a-computer-has-to-make-the-call messages, which instead of forwarding I let play just so I wouldn't have to walk back out to the living room. As the messages were winding down I was gaining the courage to call Kelsi, as it was far too late to call over to Taylor's house. I walked towards the table where that damn machine set and had almost reached it when I stopped in my tracks.

One familiar voice, two simple words.

"I'm sorry."


	12. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

I lost count of how many times I hit the replay button, just to hear those two words from him. I checked the time and date stamp… 'Oh, God,' I said to myself, 'yesterday…yesterday! Why couldn't I have checked my messages sooner? Why did I stop forwarding my calls to my cell? Why…'

I stopped pacing back and forth for a moment, collecting my thoughts.

Do I call? Do I not call? And what was he sorry for—the way he reacted, how we left it, or the fact that he slept with me? I continued agonizing my over-analyzation of his short message while glancing at the clock, worrying about my mom and waiting for regular visitors' hours to commence. What's a girl to do?

_'I called in reinforcements,'_ I remember Troy saying once, referring to his brother whom he contacted when he was feeling so low. He wasn't like me, though; when the chips were down, I drew inward, shutting out those I cared about the most. It had always been a weakness of mine, and would probably continue to be…unless I did something about it.

I jumped as the phone rang and I answered it immediately. "Hello?" I tried not to sound to anxious, fearing it would be the worst of news.

"So you are alive." Kelsi…Kelsi who apparently was getting, or had gotten, rather friendly with Troy's brother Ryan. Kelsi who knew above all the other girls that sometimes alone time was what the doctor ordered. "Were you thinking I was someone else?"

"No…no… I didn't know who it would be," I admitted.

"Listen, Gabi, I think…"

"My mom's in the hospital," I blurted out, biting back tears. "And…and I feel helpless, and so, so guilty…no, ashamed…I feel ashamed for what I've done…and I can't deal right now but I'm trying to, and…" I covered my mouth with my hand, choking back a sob. "I don't think I can do this alone."

Did that just come from me?

"I'm on my way," she said without hesitation, and hung up the phone.

She wisely decided against waking the rest of the girls and showed up, a pint of ice cream of her own, ready to listen to…well, silence.

"I don't know where to start, I don't know if I should say anything." I sat down tentatively in my papasan chair for the first time since returning from our trip.

"If it helps, there isn't much that I know," Kelsi said, taking a bite of her Cookies and Cream ice cream. "Ryan's trying to pry info from me; I guess Troy's not talking either. With the exception that at least Ryan says Troy's still _answering his phone_."

"I told you I'm sorry, damn!" She could tell by my tone I wasn't really angry. "Way to kick a girl when she's down."

"You're right, you don't need kicked," she agreed, and then quickly added, "You need bitch-slapped, right upside your head."

"Thanks!" I said, my eyes wide, then again Kelsi was the best person for me to talk this out with. She wouldn't bullshit me in the least.

"To hell with all the hindsight, Gabi! Who cares what who did or said, or what should have been done. He said he's sorry, for whatever reason, and it's about damn time you did the same."

"At…"I glanced at the clock, "two in the morning."

"You'd be returning the favor," she commented with a grin. "Oh, oh, OH! Wait! Don't call him yet. Two thirty! Isn't that when he called?"

"Two thirty five," I corrected her.

"So that gives you…thirty four minutes roughly to tell me everything that happened because either Troy didn't spill to Ryan, or Ryan wasn't spilling to me." I wondered briefly if I should, still taking glances between the clock and the phone, still sick with worry over my mother. "Hey…" Kelsi's voice was very soft now and I looked over at her. "You're Mom is in the best hands possible, ok? I'm just trying to help you here, if you don't want to talk about it,"

"He's… amazing," I finally said, sinking back into the chair, smiling wistfully. "He's so funny, witty… thoughtful…"

"Holy fucknuts, Gabi, he sounds so romantic."

I paused for a moment, reflecting. "I don't…well, he wasn't, not with me."

"I don't understand."

"When…when we…" I couldn't tell her about the sheer determination in his eyes, the way we greedily stole every ounce of passion from one another. It was about as far from romantic as one could get, it was…

"He…hates me," I said softly, tears in my eyes.

"What? No…no, you've got to be mistaken."

"I'm not, Kelsi, he…he was so, so angry."

"I'm not asking that, I'm asking if you had sex with him!" She emphasized with her hands and I sighed softly.

"And that's what I'm telling you."

"Angry sex? Like… get even, all hot and bothered…"

"Destroy the room and try to destroy each other…sex," I ended for her. "Yes."

She sat there, spoon in her hand its melting contents dripping into her bowl, her mouth wide open. She blinked a couple of times, mouth still open, not moving a muscle.

"What?" I asked.

"Hot….damn," was all she said, dropping her spoon into her bowl and setting it aside. "Wow, that had to have been…well, aside from what millions of other women dream of…"

"But, he hates me, you don't get it." I took a trembling breath before I continued. "I didn't even know what was going on until the next morning."

"How so?"

"Because I went out to tell him, and that's when he blindsided me."

"Not to sound insensitive, Gabriella, but don't you think he was a tad bit blindsided himself?" I lowered my head at her words, knowing it was true. "You should have seen how ecstatic Ryan was when he found out who you were! He couldn't wait to call Troy and give him hell over it. And you," I glanced up and she pointed at me for emphasis, "You had said you were going to tell him yourself. And you should have, just like we told you to from the beginning."

"Kelsi,"

"No, listen to me, because I'm your friend and I'm going to be the first one to call you on your bullshit, got it?" I nodded slightly, wiping a single tear that had fallen. "You have got this…this chip on your shoulder that I just don't get, other than understanding we're all our own worst critics. You are beautiful, one of the most beautiful things about you is you don't know it! And pull your head out of your ass for one minute and look around you—not every man is attracted to those stick figures you see in the magazines. And what is this bullshit about you not thinking you're intelligent or witty enough to carry on a conversation? Do you think that I, or any of the rest of the girls, would briefly consider you such a good friend if you were some airhead?"

"Kelsi…"

"And you second guess yourself all the damn time!" She stood up then, pacing, arms gesturing to try and get her point across. "And then…along came this…knight or sorts, not in shining armor, but on a blocked call, and boom! There you were, there was the Gabriella that only a good twelve pack could bring out, and all he had to do was say hello and you would just…" She stopped then and looked at me. "Did you know that Troy said your smile could light up that whole arena? He said that back at the hotel, when he was watching you deal out a few cards from that stupid deck, and at that time he didn't know it was…you."

"That was for me?" I asked, briefly remembering the comment, thinking it was for Moira who was the life of our small party.

"Who'd you think it was for? How many times have we told you that you have the most beautiful smile known? But, no, you don't listen…but you know what? You're going to listen now. You're going to listen not just to me, but to what your heart is telling you to do right…now."

She reached back and grabbed the receiver to my cordless phone and set it in front of me.

"No… no."

"Don't even think about saying 'no' to me, not now," Kelsi continued. "To hell with two thirty-five, you pick up that phone and you call him now."

"I…can't."

"Don't even try to tell me you don't know his number, because Ryan said he gave it to you in the message, which means now that you're home you have it. Hell, I sat there and argued for almost an hour about how you couldn't get your messages when we were in Phoenix!"

I sunk back into the chair, remembering how Troy had accused me of lying about that as well. Who could blame him?

"When it finally sunk in, he thanked me and said he had to call his brother right away." She sat back on the couch, crossing her legs Indian-style.

"When was that?" I asked, my voice small.

"Yesterday," she replied, and I stifled another sob.

"So it took that for him to apologize."

"Technically it is_ you_ that needs to apologize to _him_," Kelsi pointed out.

"I did!" I said. "I tried, and he just wouldn't listen! So what the hell am I supposed to say to him now?"

"You really want to know?" she asked incredulously. She fiddled with my answering machine for a moment, then Troy's voice filled the room.  
_  
"I'm sorry."_

As his voice reverberated around me, Kelsi's words finally sunk in. Hoping he could forgive me for waiting so long, I reached for the phone. Kelsi giggled with delight, then whispered "Sorry," when I glared at her.

I took a deep breath, and…

The phone began ringing, causing both of us to shriek and jump slightly.

"Is it him?" she asked excitedly, and I shook my head no as I answered.

"Gabriella, this is Dr. Craig. We need you to return to the hospital immediately."


	13. Chapter 13

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

"I'm so, so sorry," the nurse was saying, not that I was paying a damn bit of attention.

I was numb. I was far, far too numb.

How could my mom be gone?

"I want to see her," I interrupted the condolence speech. "Tell them…all of them… to get out. I want to see her."

"Of course, ma'am," she said quietly. 'Again with the ma'ams,' I thought, trembling uncontrollably.

"Gabriella, you don't have to do this now," Lisa, my dutiful older sister, was saying. "You can save it for…"

"She wants to see her mom, she's going to go see her," Kelsi spoke up, unable to hide the biting anger in her voice. I was so thankful she'd been there to drive me; I just couldn't understand how I didn't get there in time. It also helped that Kelsi had immediately jumped to my defense for everything else I had apparently done wrong, from helping Mom come to the decision to sign a DNR (especially after seeing Dad suffer) to not being there when she…when she…

I walked slowly into the room, the silence enveloping me. Gone were the tubes and the wires, no more beeping machines to annoy or worry me. There was just…Mom, alone. She was still, peaceful, with a serene look, perhaps just a hint of a smile on her face.

"You must've seen Dad," I commented, brushing a strand of her hair back from her face. I lowered myself onto the chair beside the bed, holding her hand one last time. She was cold…so, so very cold.

"You know," I kept going, perhaps to stay sane, "you were supposed to wait for me to talk to you. See, you said we'd talk tomorrow, and I know it's tomorrow and all, but…" my voice trailed off as I gave her hand a squeeze she'd never feel.

"I have so much to tell you." I inhaled a shaky breath and let out a short laugh. "I know how much you missed Daddy, though. But… I just…I can't think of the last time I really, really needed to talk to you because I screwed up and…"

I leaned up against the rail, willing her to open her eyes, knowing it would never happen again. "How did you know that you were in love with Dad?" I paused briefly, remembering how happy they always seemed. We never knew if they had any problems, although I'm sure with them being human they did. "Was it just a hunch, or something that you feel right here, deep inside, when you saw him, or heard his voice? Because… well…" I fought back the tears that I just didn't have the time for and kept going. "Mom, I really think that I love him…Troy. Well, you know him as Not John, but he has a name, a real one, and you were right, I wasn't lying." Oblivious to Dr. Craig entering the room, I continued. "See, he had this number written down, but it was wrong. And I found out a little while later that it was Troy Bolton…remember me telling you how much I really liked his music? Yeah, Mom, it was that Troy, can you believe it?

"But this is where I need you to… to…tell me what to do, I screwed up so bad." Again I took in a breath, keeping myself from crying. "I met him. Yep, I did, and I was so afraid that he would take one look at me and never call me again, so… I know you taught me better, Mom, I know you did… I lied to him." My voice was barely above a whisper now. "And it was so, so bad when he found out the truth, and I know he says he's sorry, but I don't know what for, and I don't know what to say to make this right, and this…" I looked over my shoulder as Dr. Craig left the room, then turned back to my mom. "This is what I needed to talk to you about, because I don't know how to fix it, and I'm so, so scared of screwing this up, and I'm even more scared knowing you're not going to be there to pick up the pieces."

I sat there in silence, staring at her peaceful frame. "I complained on more than one occasion how I thought you meddled in my life," I admitted. "And when I saw you last, when we went out to lunch… it was Troy that talked me into going, and I'm sorry that I was so reluctant, so secretive all the time." I shrugged as if she could see me. "That's a part of me I don't like, and I don't know how to change it. Mom… who's…" I squeezed her hand again, as if I could draw strength from her. "Who's gonna pry into my life now?"

Kelsi walked in the room and came up behind me, giving me a slight hug. "I called the girls. I called Sharon, too. They wanna know if you want them to come here or meet us at your place."

"She was alone, I can't… I can't leave her…"

"Gabi, she's not alone anymore." No, no tears. Not now.

"But she…she's just…"

"Let's have them meet us at your place, ok?" Kelsi said. "When you're ready." I turned to ask her how I could ever be ready when Dr. Craig entered the room.

"There's a phone call for you," he said, looking straight at me. "You can take it in my office, if you like."

"C'mon, Gabi," Kelsi said softly. I merely nodded, still completely numb, and followed Dr. Craig down the hall to the elevators. As we rode to the next floor up where the cushy offices were, he turned to me.

"She passed very suddenly, in her sleep," he said to me, his eyes troubled. He was a doctor; he saw this every day, why did it bother him? "I wanted you to know, and I'm sorry, we did what we could."

"She had that DNR for a reason," I was finally able to say, although I think it was to convince myself. He nodded without saying anything else as we went down the nearly deserted hall to his office.

"Is it Sharon?" I asked, thinking she would be the only one with a more private hospital number.

"No," he replied. "I'll let your friend know you'll be down shortly."

I sat down and answered the phone, still numb, still shaking, just needing some warmth around me. I felt as cold as my mom lying lifeless just one floor below.

I was met with the softest, kindest voice I'd heard in so, so long.

"I'd ask if you were okay, but I already know the answer."

As if Mom was smiling down on me, Troy was there, on the other line, comforting me when I needed him the most.

"I'm sorry…"

"Stop, stop, now's not the time for that, I'm asking about you. Who's with you?"

"Kelsi's downstairs," I said, confused why he would ask since she had to have been the one to inadvertently let him know.

"Good, I didn't want you to be alone."

"Thank you," I began, but again he interrupted, perhaps not knowing what I really meant to say.

"What are friends for?" Friends. With me.

There isn't much of anything else that could have warmed my heart more.

"Troy, I mean…thank you, for talking me into going to lunch with my mom that day."

"Guilting you is more like it," he admitted.

"Yes, but…I wouldn't have gone, and we had the best time, and…hey! She did believe me."

"Did she, now?" he asked, his voice still soft.

"And…we were going to talk about it tomorrow…today…Troy, do you ever sleep?"

"Pardon?" he asked, confused at my last question.

"It's… it's four? I think? Or is it three? Do you ever sleep?"

"Not much lately, but this isn't about me, Gabriella, it's about you."

"I'm fine, don't worry about me."

"Don't do that, please." There was something different about his tone. "I do worry, about you. I can't help it."

I bit my lip to keep the tears away, but it was getting more and more difficult.

"Gabriella, you need to…deal with this."

"Not now, please not now," I begged, not necessarily to him, but in general. My heart was already in pieces, bleeding, feeling beyond repair. If I let myself feel this too, I would explode.

"I know I'm not there right now,"

"I wish you were," I heard myself breathe into the phone. I heard him inhale sharply and wondered to myself if I had gone to far. "Troy…"

"How many times must I tell you not to do that to me?" he joked, but his voice told another story, sounding as emotional as me.

"It's not like I'll listen," I retorted, my voice also not matching my words. I heard commotion in the background with him and he swore under his breath.

"I have to go," he said wearily. "I don't want to, Gabriella…you know that, right?"

"I'm so, so…"

"Not now, ok? Go, find your reinforcements."

"Troy... about Elizabeth..."

"No...we'll talk about it later," he reiterated, but I had to tell him.

"That's my mom's name," I said quickly, and he paused, as if waiting for more. "When I was too scared to tell you, I gave you her name. I didn't mean it to offend you."

"Your mom's name...then I'm honored." Again sounding close to tears, he continued. "Have Kelsi drive you home, ok?"

"I will," I agreed, then paused before asking, "Until later?"

"Until later."

I held those words in my heart as I rose from the chair to go face my reality that seemed to be crashing all around me.


	14. Chapter 14

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

The sky was cold and gray the morning I said my final goodbyes to my mother. I was still numb, unable to process much information, had yet to shed a single tear since I'd stepped foot in the hospital that night. Kelsi had driven me to the funeral home where Sharpay was waiting with Taylor and her family. Every place I looked I saw people dressed starkly in black, expressions as somber as mine.

One would think I could go to my family, my brothers and sisters, in this time; instead, I found myself firmly set aside, apparently banished from all family activities including the gathering at Lisa's house planned for after the funeral. I was the black sheep, see… I was in medical, but couldn't save her; I had helped her prepare and sign her DNR; I worked at the hospital and wasn't there when she passed away…the list went on for miles.

So I sat there, cold as a stone, staring at this box, its cover closed (that was another reason I was ousted from the family circle- I had seen to it my mother's wishes were followed and her funeral casket was closed), Kelsi holding my hand. I wondered briefly, maybe close to hysteria just under the surface, if I would fall to the floor if Kelsi should happen to let go. Unconsciously I squeezed her hand as the pastor from my mother's church stood to give her eulogy.

I listened to Lisa, along with a couple other sisters of mine, sobbing audibly and I felt as if I would be physically ill. It wasn't as if they were distant with Mom, but for some reason, perhaps because the day seemed so surreal, it seemed scripted and out of place. Blocking from my mind the pastor's words I stared straight ahead at that box covered with an assortment of purple flowers…again, purple, her favorite no matter how despised by other family members… I sent a silent request to Dad that he take care of her now that she was with him again.

I rode in silence to the graveyard, the raindrops keeping my attention as Sharpay and Kelsi chatted back and forth about how beautiful the service was. Stepping out of the car to walk up to Mom's gravesite, right beside Dad, I once again reached for Kelsi's hand. With each step we took the sky seemed to brighten until we were there, under the canopy…the rain had stopped and tiny rays of sun began to peak through. Just beyond the hill I could see the most beautiful rainbow, so close, so perfect. I allowed myself one small smile.

Dad was welcoming Mom home.

"Who needs to go over to your stuffy sister's house anyhow?" Moira was saying later at my apartment that seemed overflowing with guests. She was in the kitchen with me and Sharon rearranging the counters with the abundance of food that was being brought in.

"Not us, that's for damn sure," Sharon chimed in. "You okay, baby girl?" I didn't answer, thinking she was speaking to Moira.

"Aunt Gabi?" Moira asked, breaking into my thoughts.

"What?" I asked, still moving on autopilot.

"Are you okay?" Sharon repeated.

"That was for me?" I asked, and she nodded. "I'm fine, don't worry about me."

That last statement brought another wave of recollection. In spite of his words, I hadn't heard from Troy since the night my mother had passed away. Perhaps he was letting me have my space, although I wasn't so sure. I hadn't slept well in days, I wasn't allowing myself the time, space, or luxury of grieving, and who knows what I would have said if he called me. It had to be for the best that he kept his distance.

"What's all this food for?" Kiera, Taylor's youngest daughter, asked as she walked into the kitchen.

"Well, I guess people bring lots of food when someone you love passes away," Moira tried to explain to her little sister. "So you don't have to worry about stuff like…eating."

Kiera looked perplexed as she stared around, finally her eyes met with mine. With a sincerity that couldn't be feigned she said to me, "My cat died a little bit ago, and you didn't bring me food." I smiled then as Moira and Sharon burst into laughter. Leaning down and kissing her cheek, I told her she could have any of this food she wanted.

I made my way out to my living room area which had at least 20 people milling about, which was plenty for my apartment and made it seem so much smaller. I was hugged intermittently by different people, mumbled many "I'm okay"s to concerned faces, and squeezed my friends just a little tighter than I normally would.

"You look beat," Taylor was saying to me.

"I am," I admitted. "And what's with you? No wine?"

"Well… I kinda can't right now." She grinned sheepishly. I squeezed her again, knowing yet another spawn of Taylor and Chad was on the way.

"Congratulations! Why didn't you tell me?"

"I just didn't think the timing was right," she explained.

"Oh, don't hand me that crap, we could all use some good news." I heard the words come from my mouth, the truth of them washing over me. She started saying something to me, but I said quickly, "Listen, I'll be right back. I need something from upstairs," I lied. I just had to get the hell out of there, regain a little more semblance of normalcy. She smiled and nodded but I didn't catch what she was about to say as I grabbed the receiver to my phone and turned for the stairs.

I walked quickly to my bedroom, pushing the door almost closed behind me, my breathing coming in short gasps. 'Calm down, calm down.. call in reinforcements, call in reinforcements…'

For the first time ever, I dialed a number I had memorized. After two rings, his voice came through, nearly instantly calming me.

"Well, look who knows how to dial a phone." It sounded like he was in a crowded room, several people talking over each other.

"Don't hang up," I pleaded, not able to say anything else at the moment.

"Why would I do that?" I could hear him moving away from the noise, and I walked further into my room, away from the door that barely muffled the sounds from downstairs.

"I…I don't know, I just needed to talk to you, I'm sorry."

"Where are you?"

"My place," I said, confused by his question. "Why?"

"No, where are you?"

"What are you doing?" I asked, noticing the noise in the background of his phone had faded greatly. I heard his phone click about the same time my bedroom door slid open.

"Following your voice." Oh… that didn't come from my phone. I turned slowly and saw him standing there, silhouetted from the light behind him. My phone slipped from my fingers as I took my first tentative step towards him, his smile inviting. He held out one hand to me, but instead I walked straight into his arms.

There was such gentleness in his embrace as he wrapped his arms around me, lightly rubbing my back, trying to ease the tension from my aching shoulders. I simply clung to him, buried my face in his chest, inhaling the all-so-familiar smell of him, and did something I hadn't been able to do in days.

I cried.


	15. Chapter 15

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

The apartment had cleared of my co-workers, Sharon being the last of them to go. "You take care, baby girl," she said to me as she hugged me goodbye. "And you," she pointed at Troy, who was standing by the stereo looking at my rows of cds with Moira. He turned towards her, an inquisitive look on his face. "What the hell took you so long?"

"I got lost?" It sounded like a question, his cheeky grin causing Sharon to laugh.

"Well, don't let it happen again," she warned, then with another big hug for me, she was out the door. This just left Kelsi, Sharpay, Taylor, Moira, Troy, and me; Chad had taken Kiera home earlier in the evening when she had gotten sleepy.

I let out a sigh, my shoulders slumping. "Love you all, but I've got to get out of these clothes," I announced heading to the stairs.

"Are you blushing?" I heard Sharpay ask someone as I was almost to the top of the stairs.

"No," was Troy's response, and I stopped for a moment, a smile touching my lips. They continued teasing him as I walked to my room. After changing into my comfy sassy pants and a loose sweatshirt, I pulled my hair into a loose bun and, standing at the vanity in the master bathroom, I splashed some cold water on my face. Oh, I was far from a graceful crier, but remembering the way Troy had just held me made me not give a damn anymore.

"Hey, listen," Taylor was saying as I was walking down the stairs, "I need to be getting back, I'm beat."

"Sure thing, pregzilla," I replied, and Troy turned to her, a genuine smile on his face.

"Hey, congratulations!" he said, giving her a one-armed squeeze.

"Thank you, thank you," she said, her face absolutely glowing. "But don't shake me, you may regret it."

"Sorry, sorry." He stepped back, still smiling.

"It's kinda… full circle," I commented, a slight smile on my face as well. I gave her a hug, without the squeezing, tears back in my eyes when I stepped away.

Kelsi was saying goodbye to Taylor and Moira when I felt Troy softly place his hand in the small of my back, and all thoughts seemed to fade. I turned to him with a smile.

"Thank you," I said to him, taking his hands in mine. "I can't…find the right words…"

"Don't sweat it," he said with a shrug, lightly caressing my hands with his. "Although I was a bit late, I'm just happy I could be here… for you."

"Me too," I said, my voice almost a whisper. "So…" I continued, my voice louder, "how long do I have you for?"

"We have about… 36 hours, I think?" He squinted at a clock, then looked back at me. "I have a room downtown."

"Can you stay just a little bit?" I asked. There were far too many issues still hanging in the air between us. "Tonight, after everyone leaves. I just… think we should…"

He kissed my forehead sweetly. "We don't have to tonight, if you're not up to it," he said softly. "But I'll stay, regardless."

There were no sensual overtones between us, simply two people who needed to right everything that had gone so horribly wrong.

Taylor and Moira left shortly after, taking Sharpay with them. Kelsi and Troy were in the living room, Kelsi in my papasan chair that on any other occasion no one would dare sit in. Troy was kicked back on my couch looking so relaxed as they discussed how Ryan was far too busy to get away.

After putting the rest of my leftovers in the refrigerator, I carried my glass of wine with me and sat beside Troy on the couch, leaving plenty of space between us. "Are you two good, or do you need anything?"

"You ask after you've already sat down," Troy teased, nudging me with his foot.

"Hey!" I nudged him back. "Just for that you can get it your damn self!" He held up his bottle of beer, sticking out his tongue at me. "Yeah, whatever. What about you?"

"Oh sure, you say 'whatever' to me, but,"

"She is the Poor Disabled Indian Girl," I reminded Troy, who raised an eyebrow and mouthed 'Oh, right.'

"Fuck you both," Kelsi said, her smile showing she wasn't truly offended.

"Be nice or I'll start calling you a Cradle Robber," I said, pointing at her, prompting her to flip me off.

"Aren't you a harsh one this evening?" Troy asked.

"Was that for her or me?" I replied and he pointed at me as he took a drink of his beer. "Well, fuck you too." He winked at my last comment before turning to Kelsi, causing the heat to creep up into my face.

"And you," he said pointing at Kelsi, "thanks." I assumed he was thanking her for calling and letting him know what was happening.

"Don't mention it," was her reply.

"I just… I don't get it." Troy turned back to me, his eyes intense. "I mean…I know you said you weren't close with your brothers and sisters, but this is just unfathomable." I shrugged at his comment.

"It's actually always been this way, unfortunately. I suppose I'm the black sheep for now, mostly because I just don't play the game."

"I'm at a loss here, being an only child," Kelsi said with a shrug. "You, Sharpay, and Taylor are the closest thing to sisters I've ever had."

"Thank you," I said, smiling. "It's an…honor." I mock-bowed to her, and she raised her glass of wine that I was unaware she had.

"While my family's far from perfect, though, we've always been…family." Troy shrugged, still perplexed by my situation. "We have always been there as a source of strength for one another, and we wouldn't have it any other way."

"You've been blessed," I commented.

"Yes," he agreed, looking me in the eyes. "I have, and I'm grateful for it." He reached over with his took my hand in his, smiling wistfully.

"Hey, it's getting late, I have to go," Kelsi said, standing up slowly and taking her glass into the kitchen.

"Are you okay to drive?" I called after her as Troy released my hand, motioning me to get up and say my goodbyes to her. I walked into the kitchen behind her as she was rinsing her glass and placing it on the counter.

"I'm good to drive, and if I wasn't I'd get a cab," she replied, smiling back at me over her shoulder. She turned towards me, drying her hands on a towel I had by the sink. I heard the TV turn on in the living room and had to smile also. "He's just making himself at home, isn't he?"

"Fine by me," I said with a shrug, then I pulled her close, hugging her as tight as I could. "I can't thank you enough."

"Seeing you with spaghetti arms is thanks enough," she said, wiggling my arms after we let go. "How long is he here?"

"About 35 more hours or so?" I answered, looking at the clock on my microwave.

"Go, enjoy, do what you gotta do." Kelsi smiled at me and kissed my cheek.

After our goodbyes Kelsi waved at Troy, who was still on the couch. "I'd get up to give you a hug, but this couch has me sucked in."

"It kinda does that to you," I commented as Kelsi walked over and hugged him.

"I'll see you," he said, adding "I'm sure," with a laugh, another jab at her and Ryan's non-relationship-thing they had going on.

"Behave," Kelsi scolded both of us as she walked out the door, leaving us truly alone for the first time since I had walked out of his hotel room in tears. We shared a shy smile, each of us wondering where to start, if we should start at all.

"C'mere," he said, his voice more than a little sleepy. So, instead of my usual perch in the papasan chair that Kelsi had recently vacated, I sat beside him on the couch, still a little distant. "Oh for fuck's sake, Gabi, I don't bite." He tugged on my sweatshirt and I scooted up next to him, resting my head comfortably on his chest, his arm wrapped securely around me before I had the chance to remind him that yes, he does in fact bite. I opened my mouth to say something, but he stopped me with a laugh saying, "Yeah, that was a lie, sorry."

"I'm not," I mumbled back, relaxing into him as the beating of his heart calmed me beyond all comprehension. He laughed softly and I felt a brief sensation, as if he were placing a kiss on the top of my head. "I missed you," I breathed into his chest.

I heard his heart beat just a little faster as he inhaled slowly. "I missed you, too." I held him slightly tighter for a moment, a brief hug from me as he softly played with my hair. We said nothing else as we continued watching something neither one of us was really paying attention to on TV Land, which I have found to be one of the coolest channels on this planet. He continued playing with my curls softly, the motions of his fingers slowing as the show wore on, coming to a complete stop. His breathing had slowed to a steady rhythm, relaxing me all the more.

"Troy?" I asked softly, and when he didn't answer I stole a glance upwards. His head was resting comfortably on the back of the couch, his eyes closed, a serene look in his features. I had to smile. "You do sleep," I whispered before lying my head back on his chest. Within moments I had drifted into the most peaceful sleep I'd had in days.


	16. Chapter 16

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

I normally don't sleep in a sweatshirt, or with a bra on for that matter. For some strange reason, any time I attempt to sleep with either, I tend to wake up with them in a heap on the floor as if in my sleep they had been thrown haphazardly across the room while I slept straight through doing it. Did I think about this when some time in the middle of the night Troy had woke and suggested we not lie on the couch as his neck was hurting? No. I simply followed blindly as we walked up the stairs and crawled into my bed together, both so obviously exhausted that we drifted straight back into sleep.

And yet, here it was… 10 a.m., sun peeking through my not-so-light-reducing curtains. We were lying in bed, his arm draped over my bare torso. My sweatshirt and bra were thrown over towards the dresser, completely out of arms reach.

Well…shit.

How the hell was I going to get out of this one?

I tried wiggling slightly out from under his arm to only have him sigh softly and pull me in closer. 'Oh, this feels…nice,' I thought. I didn't remember being in his arms after our one wild night; if I'm not mistaken, I believe we both collapsed in exhaustion, and I'd woke a little while later alone in the large bed.

As he shifted, his hand traveled north and my body began to betray me. I felt goose bumps on my arms and a tightening in my stomach as his hand opened wide, pulling me closer to him. I felt him settle in, holding me firm up against his body, as I lay there helpless. Oh, sure, I could throw his arm off me, push him away, walk across the room, and get dressed; this would also most likely wake him, and for some reason unknown to me I just didn't want him to see me…well, vulnerable? Is that the word I'm looking for? Hell, who knows what was going through my mind, because it definitely flew out the window when I felt him turn his head slightly, breathing in the scent of my hair. In the recesses of my mind I wondered if he could still smell my jasmine shampoo. He answered with another sleepy sigh.

"I thought you used vanilla," I heard him mumble, sounding rather groggy.

Vanilla? When had I ever used vanilla?

"I've never used that," I replied warily, and he jumped as if I startled him awake, still holding onto me.

"Hmmm?" That seemed to be all he could manage, and I turned slightly to look at him. He smiled softly and laid his head back on the pillow. "Morning…missing something?"

I felt my face turn about five different shades of red as he just laid there grinning at me. I pulled the covers up to nearly my chin as Troy turned on his side resting his head on his arm. He left his arm draped across me, his fingers lightly tracing some unseen outline on my skin.

"You know," he continued, that impish grin firmly planted on his face, "it was quite the vision watching you wrestling with that thing, struggling to get it over your head." Over my…ah, hell, my hair! I gingerly put a hand up to my hair, wincing as I felt the hot mess it had to look like. Groaning, I pulled the covers over my head as he laughed. Peeking his head under to look at me he winked and added, "The bra was one hell of an added bonus."

"Well…shit!" was all I could say as I scrambled to get out of bed and hurried to my discarded shirt, holding it up in front of me.

"Must I remind you I've seen you in much, much less?" Did he have to sound so damn sexy, even when tired? Unable to form a coherent answer I hurried to the washroom to survey the damage.

"Oh… God!" I groaned, wiping a smudge out from under one eye and trying to pull the curls out of their mess to at least pin it up so I could retrieve clothes and other provisions for my shower.

"Well, I can't take credit for that statement…today." Troy was obviously standing right outside the door. I stood there thinking momentarily before blushing even more, in spite of the fact that he couldn't see me. I opened the door so quickly it caught him off guard and he stumbled a bit into the washroom with me. Of course he looked perfect, absolutely perfect with that hair sticking up in all the right places…absolutely perfect, grinning down at me before pulling me into a warm embrace, my shirt caught between my bare chest and him. His hands caressed my bare back sending shivers through me. "Gabi?" His voice was soft, soothing, inviting… he could have asked me to jump off the Empire State Building and I would have said yes. I buried my face in his chest, smiling.

"Hmmm?" I mumbled my response. He was quiet for a moment before I heard him take a breath as if he wanted to speak, but didn't. It was about then that I remembered we were standing in front of a mirror, and when I peered towards it, I met his eyes in the reflection as he was looking at me.

"You have such a beautiful smile," he said, his expression sweet and relaxed. Although I thought it impossible, my heart melted even more as we stood there, studying each others faces in the reflection. Standing up against the length of him, I could feel his phone begin to vibrate in his pocket, breaking the spell he seemed to have me under. He sighed as he reached for it, stepping back from me as he pulled it out slightly to check the number, trying to hide the light in his eyes when he saw the number. "I have to take this," he said, and I smiled at him as he stepped from the room.

I headed back towards my bedroom to find my clothes for the day as I heard him say with absolute joy in his voice, "Carter! Holy shit, I've been trying for, like… weeks to find you again! You got my messages then?" I smiled softly to myself as I heard his laugh fill the entire apartment from his perch downstairs, and peeking down I could see him once again kicked back on the couch. I still held my shirt in front of me although Troy was downstairs and couldn't see what I was doing as I leaned into the hall closet to get fresh towels.

"You're… kidding," I heard him say, his voice getting softer. "Really? You? And… wow, um…congratulations." He sounded more shocked than happy to me, and I didn't even know what was going on in this private world of his. As I walked back to the washroom I heard him add, "I guess I won't be able to call you Carter after that, huh? Married…wow. Yeah, of course I'll be there, why wouldn't I be? Besides the obvious, but we'll plan around it."

I felt as if I was intruding into something I shouldn't be witnessing, even if I was only hearing his side of the conversation. There was just something in the change of his voice that sent a warning signal through my body that I tried to ignore during my preparation for the rest of the day. We only had a few hours left, and I had so much to tell him that I didn't want to waste any time.

After I had showered, dressed, and primped… loosely, not trying to look as if I was out to get back into his pants, because I so wasn't… I took the stairs two at a time. It was as if he didn't hear me he was so lost in his own thoughts, staring at the television as some movie channel was replaying 'Almost Famous', and he was absentmindedly turning his phone over and over in his hand. "Hey," my voice seemed to break through, and he looked up at me and smiled.

"Sorry, it's one of my favorite movies," he said, standing up and stretching. "I need to head back to the hotel and get cleaned up."

"Oh, okay," I replied. He tilted his head slightly to the side and grinned at me.

"You could be a doll and drive me there. I'll even be nice and not take as long as SOME people to get ready."

"Hey!"

"Just kidding, just kidding." He pulled me into another soft hug that I returned. "Thanks, Gabi…I needed that," he said softly as he stepped back.

"Feeling's mutual," was all I could say.

We were silent for the most part on the drive all the way to his hotel, Troy staring out his window at the passing scenery. When one of his songs came on the radio I was surprised that he reached up and switched the station. "Why'd you do that?" I asked, taking momentary glances at him, and he shrugged.

"Just didn't feel like listening to it today." Wow, had his mood ever changed. Either he was upset over his phone call, or he was dreading the conversation that we desperately needed to have. He turned towards me suddenly, his face serious. "I know you've been through a lot these past few days, we don't have to…" He looked away again, not finishing his sentence.

"Don't you think we should?" I asked. He nodded slightly, still not looking at me. We pulled up to a red light, and I reached out and touched his arm. "I have so much to say, and it isn't going to be easy." He still wasn't looking at me, his eyes staring over to the right to where I wasn't even sure he could see my face. A car horn behind me signaled that we needed to start moving again. When I put both hands on the wheel he reached over, lightly touching where my hand had once been, as if trying to remember the feel of it there.

It was all the subtle, or perhaps not so subtle, body language coming from him that was ripping my heart to shreds. I pulled into the parking garage of the hotel he was staying at and reached out to stop him from exiting the car once we came to a stop. "I…don't know what's wrong, and I'm not sure how to ask whether or not it has anything to do with me."

"I could talk to you," he said softly, then looked over at me. Tears were swimming in those beautiful eyes that this day were a stormy gray. "And…that meant something to me, and I don't think…"

"I understand." I pulled back not waiting for him to finish.

"No, stop," he said, reaching out and grabbing my hand. "I don't think I'm ready to let go of that, I don't want to let go, and all of this 'we need to talk' and all of these damn…these…questions, or whatever the hell they are, I don't know if I can handle the answers to them right now." He wiped his eyes hastily and added, "Right now, I just need to… be. Can we just… be? Right now?" A single tear that he didn't catch fell from his lower lashes. I reached out and caught it with my fingertip and his eyes slid shut.

"Yes, yes. Yes." He squeezed my hand at my miserable attempt to copy his famous words.

"Confession time later, then." It was more of a statement then a question. When I nodded in agreement, he smiled. "Well, ok, so come on up with me while I get ready."

I had fully expected to have him call me when he was ready to be picked up, but smiled and followed his lead.

It seemed I wasn't the only one in need of comforting.


	17. Chapter 17

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

"Wait…wait," Troy was saying as we were raiding my refrigerator a couple hours later, "weren't we gonna sit on the phone and…kinda…watch this together?" I smiled up at him, the memory of that conversation warming me from the tips of my toes.

"It kind of baffles me, though, how you would want to sit through a marathon of 'Family Jewels'. I know how you are about your privacy."

"But, see, he's… thank you," he said politely as I handed him a beer. "He's Gene Simmons! And besides, he's welcomed them into his…life, per se. It isn't as if this is done by paparazzi."

"Ok, point made. How much time do we have?" I asked. He glanced around me at the clock on the microwave.

"Fifteen minutes, maybe?"

"Have I told you how happy I am that you're here?" I just threw it out there, in that moment where I felt so alive just 24 hours after saying goodbye to my mother. He seemed genuinely touched by my sentiment and reached out, gently tousling my curls.

"It's nice to know," he replied, helping me stand. "Do we have everything?"

"For now," I said, grinning. "Remember we were waiting until hour three…"

"For popcorn, right!" His smile widened at my recollection. "Wow, I'm impressed." We settled into our seats on the couch and I pulled the coffee table a little closer, clearing its contents so we could prop our feet up. "One last thing," he said, reaching in his pocket for his cell phone. As he powered it off he added, "No interruptions."

"Okay," I agreed, unplugging the phone line from the base. We wouldn't be able to hear the upstairs phone if it rang, so we were good to go. He held up his beer and we clinked our bottles together as if to say 'cheers' and each took a drink.

"You should really not drink too much tonight, though; you know, since you can't handle your alcohol." He wasn't even looking at me, but had that damn impish grin on his face.

"I can't… what do you mean I can't handle my alcohol? I handle my alcohol just FINE, thank you."

"Suuuuuuuure," he drew the word out, taking another drink of his beer. "Uh huh, see this?" He tilted his head to the side, the remnants of our evening just barely visible.

"And?" I asked. "I'd show you what you did, but I'd have to drop my pants to do it." He looked over at me then, still grinning, eyebrows disappearing under the shock of bangs that fell across his forehead. "No way, pal, you wanna see that, you have to get them off yourself."

The look on his face absolutely generated heat, but he said nothing and turned back towards the television as if all these commercials before our marathon were the most interesting things on Earth. As we sat there in silence for what seemed like eternity I wondered, yet again, if I had stepped over the line. As if to answer my silent question, he leaned over and gently kissed my cheek. Perhaps someone else would have been insulted over such a sweet, chaste gesture, but I found it far too endearing and could merely blush and smile in response.

Halfway through the first episode, during commercial of course, he suddenly said, "Time's not exactly on our side today, is it?" The hours were dwindling down to when he had to be back on that plane, under very strict orders from his management.

"No…no, it's not," I answered. He was looking straight ahead, but I doubted if he was actually seeing anything. He sighed heavily then and placed everything on the table, sitting up straighter and running his fingers through is hair.

"She was my best friend," he began. "No, more than my best friend. She was my first…my first…everything."

"Elizabeth?" I asked, knowing that name above all others, at least the way it had been played through the media.

"No, not even close," he replied, still not looking at me. "Jesssica Carter was my first crush, my first love, my first…no, not broken,_ shattered_ heart, and sometimes I think I still haven't found all the pieces."

Carter…this must have been who he was speaking to.

"I don't talk about her, see? Because I can't, because that's just…well, it's no one's business and it's something I have to shoulder the blame for. But she was still my best friend, and I loved…I love her, and I always will, in that part of my heart that only she resides in. Does that make sense?" He finally looked at me and I wasn't the least bit surprised to see his eyes glistened over.

"It makes perfect sense," I responded, as best I could. Perhaps this was his way of telling me that there was no hope because he would spend the rest of his life pining away for her.

"I want her to be happy, with everything that's inside of me. When it was…when that part of our journey was over, I couldn't even stay there, I moved out of the fucking state, and I begged her to just…be happy. And she is." He smiled and shrugged, brushing a stray tear away. "I suppose I just never believed she'd be happy with anyone but me."

"So…you don't want her to get married." He started to say something, his face registering confusion, so I added, "Sound carries rather well throughout this apartment. I overheard your end of the conversation."

He looked down for a brief moment, and then his eyes were back on me. "I don't know what I feel about it," he admitted. "Jess and I haven't been…that way, anyhow…we haven't been together for years. I don't know how I feel about it right now. God," he breathed in, leaning back into the cushions and staring at me. "I've not talked about this with anyone, not in…this position." He gestured between the two of us as if to clarify what he meant. "This is foreign territory to me. Well, kinda…because I feel I can talk to you. Not to sound redundant, but does _that_ make sense?"

"Yes," I replied. I reached out and held his hand. "So…that's what's been bothering you today."

"I'd by lying if I said that was all of it." He gently squeezed my hand before continuing. "I'm just not ready to hear that you don't want me in your life. I know it's coming," he added quickly, placing two fingers over my lips. "I know it's a lot of bullshit to deal with, and I'm sure you wouldn't believe me if I told you I didn't fall into bed with every beautiful woman I met, and…how is it that we seemed to trust each other so implicitly until we…"

"I'm the one that messed that up." It was my turn to interrupt him, and since we both knew that statement was the truth he had no witty retort. "And I'm asking that you hear me out without jumping to conclusions, please."

"Okay," he said softly.

"I didn't know for a long time." At a loss of where I should begin, I felt the best thing to do was tell him everything. "All I knew was how you made me feel, how happy I was whenever I got to talk with you, about anything and everything. It meant…the world to me to have someone listen without judgment. It still does."

"But it mattered to you, who I am." His voice was so melancholy when he said those words.

"Not in the way that you have in your head," I corrected him. "It mattered because of… me." His eyebrows furrowed together as if he were silently asking what I was talking about. "I'm not…perfect, I'm not arm candy or some Barbie doll. I'm not a model or an actress or… stop shaking your head at me! I'm serious!"

"And to me, that's insulting," he said.

"It's hard to explain my insecurities, what can I say? I'm just trying to be honest with you, Troy, because I felt…then what you're feeling now, like you would just disappear, and I'm not ready for that to happen, I don't want it to."

"So you think I'm hung up on the superficial, that I wouldn't find you attractive, and that because you felt this way about yourself I wouldn't want anything else to do with you."

"Strike that first part and you have it in a nutshell," I said. I could tell by the twitch in his jaw that his perception of my opinion truly bothered him. "Tell me why you thought I would want nothing to do with you."

"Because of what I do," his voice was small, barely audible above the show we were now ignoring. "Because I…shouldn't have… I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but it shouldn't have happened…us, like that." Oh wow, so he did regret it. I backed away slightly, my heartbeat so loud in my ears I could barely make a cohesive thought. "I only meant to say…"

"Goodbye," I finished for him. "You were going to say goodbye."

"I was hurt, Gabriella. I thought I could trust you… You, Not Telling…You…and when Ryan called and told me that this beautiful woman in my room, the one I had tried to convince myself wasn't the one I was falling desperately for, was… God, when I found out who you were, I refused to believe him so I called your number, and…there you were. And with the message I had left,"

"I didn't get the message…"

"I know that now, but you understand why I didn't believe it at the time?" I nodded 'yes'. "You had plenty of chances, though, after you knew your theory was wrong. Why not tell me then?"

"When was I going to? When you were telling me to be quiet, or telling me there was someone else? Or when you were…"

"When I was kissing you," he finished for me, his voice soft, his fingers lightly touching my lips as if they were fragile. An involuntary shiver passed through me and he quickly drew his hand away.

"But then…"I kept going, my breathing slightly labored with the memory of what happened after that phone call. "Then you knew, and… why, Troy? Why did you kiss me then? Why did you…" My voice trailed off, unable to finish my sentence as my eyes unwisely traveled to his lips.

"I wanted to." Boy, that was real simple, direct, and to the point. "Gabriella, please don't think I was using you. I swear to you I wasn't. I thought you would know that, but," He shrugged, unable to form any other words either. We sat there in silence, both of us looking at our hands that were joined together, his slightly caressing mine.

"I think…I wasn't thinking," I finally said. "I wasn't wanting to think, I just wanted…to be… with you."

"That's what I wanted, too," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. We continued staring at our hands, his squeezing mine as I began to tremble slightly.

"But now…" I could hardly believe I said those two words.

"Now I… I have to know if you're wanting Troy the man, or Troy the rock star."

"If you don't know the answer to that, then you never knew me at all." We looked into each other's eyes then, my heart breaking when I saw the sadness etched in his features. "And I have to know that you believe me, and forgive me for being so wrong."

Troy released my hand and tenderly tucked a curl behind my ear, his fingertips lightly brushing against my face, before returning his hand to mine once more. "Fair enough," he said. I'm not going to say it didn't hurt me that he couldn't say the words at the time, but I wasn't quite through yet.

"I also have to know," I continued, my eyes locked with his, "that it really is me you want to be with, not the version you had put together before we met… and not…" my mind traveled to that morning, when he had sleepily asked why I stopped using vanilla shampoo. "…not someone else entirely."

"And…for now?" I wanted to cry at his last question, but I kept my composure.

"Do you want to say goodbye?" I asked, my calm exterior contradicted by my racing heart.

"I already told you that I don't, pay attention." He was trying to lighten the mood, and even if he hadn't meant for it to be amusing I couldn't help but smile. "What about you?"

"Say goodbye? Not a chance," I managed to say with a smile. "You're stuck with me."

"Good, now go make some popcorn woman, this stuff isn't cutting it, and we're missing our marathon." I swatted at him playfully before walking towards the kitchen. "Who needs Jackie when I have you?" I heard him joke as I retrieved a bowl and started the popcorn in the microwave.

I looked out at him in the living room, re-stretched out with his feet resting on my coffee table, and had to sigh. For as relaxed as he attempted to portray his body language to be, his face showed me what I had feared since earlier that day: in his heart, he wished he were somewhere else.


	18. Chapter 18

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN**

We were in our seats, settled in and watching that marathon, the bowl of popcorn between us. Troy ate a few kernels, crinkled up his nose, and set the bowl on my lap.

"Not enough salt," he said, pointing towards the kitchen as if I should get up and take care of it. I looked over at him incredulously and set the bowl on his lap.

"Get off your lazy ass and get it yourself."

"You wound me with your words, Not Telling!" he exclaimed, placing the bowl back on my lap. "Am I not a guest in your home?"

"Who has taken over my couch, my car radio, my remote control…" I placed the bowl back on his lap, taking a few kernels out and eating them as he continued.

"So you weren't just being hospitable?"

"Hell no, and I'm not Alfred, or Jackie, or whatever you're calling him these days. I'm not on your payroll, go get your own damn salt."

"Jeez, all you had to do was say so." He had his bottom lip sticking out as if he was pouting as he walked into the kitchen, holding the bowl of popcorn in one hand and the remote control in the other. I couldn't help but giggle as he stuffed the remote in his back pocket and grabbed the saltshaker, vigorously pouring it over our popcorn.

"Um…you mind not putting so much on there? I'm not really in the mood to break out my water pills," I commented. He looked over at me out of the corner of his eye and continued shaking the salt over the popcorn. I rolled my eyes and looked back at the screen where Gene was being…well, Gene, which is why I love this show so. A few more shakes of salt and Troy was back on his way over to the couch. He sat down placing the bowl back between us, proud of his accomplishment as he took a large handful and began eating it. He didn't seem fazed in the least by the over abundance of salt that he had to have put on the popcorn, so I shrugged and grabbed some. I was confident that he had pretended to put so much on.

I was wrong.

"God, this is AWFUL!" I exclaimed and grabbed my drink to wash what I had eaten down.

"Is there a problem?"

"You ruined my popcorn!"

"Oh, it's your popcorn now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Go make some more!" I exclaimed, pointing towards the kitchen.

"Oh no, no, no…" He couldn't keep the smile off his face as he said, "Get off your lazy ass and get it yourself." I merely stared at him with my mouth open, my own words being thrown back at me. Without taking his eyes off the television he reached over with a single finger and pushed my chin up to close my mouth.

"Oh for fuck's sake," I muttered, turning before he could see my grin.

"There you go, that temper coming through," he called out to me as I made my way towards the kitchen. "You know, I always pictured you with red hair. You know…like with a redheaded temper…I just don't know why. But it was ever since that day when you were just hating on that Starship song."

"That song SUCKS!" I replied, garnering a large, genuine laugh from him, which caused me to peer around at him where he was doubled over. "What?"

"That's…that's exactly what… I said.."

"…I would normally say," I remembered out loud. "Except for the fact I was trying to sound like your dork ass."

"Dork ass?" he said, still trying to control his laughter. "So much for your extended vocabulary."

"Bite me," I called back to him, and his laughter suddenly ceased.

"Gabriella…Christine…you know better than to say that to me."

Damnit, he needed to quit teasing me like that! I felt the heat course through my body and was thankful for the distance between us as our eyes met from across the room.

"Saved by the bell," he said as the microwave beeped, which apparently I missed thanks to my mind being in a much different place. I shook my head as I walked over to the counter, getting a new bowl and pouring the contents of my untainted popcorn. I made it a point to only shake a small amount of salt on it, then walked back over to the couch, taking my usual seat. This time there was no bowl of popcorn between us as Troy had it on his lap. I could barely concentrate enough to eat a piece or two, somehow his presence had taken hold of my brain and left me not a stuttering fangirl, but a woman with intimate memories of an extremely passionate man who looked like a God when he hovered close, hair and skin damp with sweat, and…

"What the hell are you doing?" I asked when I saw him take some popcorn from the bowl on my lap.

"Eating popcorn," he said slowly, looking at me as if I'd come from Mars. "And.." he lifted his bottle, "drinking beer. Oh, and there's this show I'm trying to watch that you keep interrupting."

"You have your own damn popcorn!"

He scrunched up his nose and replied, "Too salty."

I replied by taking a few kernels and throwing them at him.

"What?" he asked, turning towards me. "You're gonna…hey! Quit throwing shit at me!"

"Oooo where'd your extensive…" I threw another piece at him, "vocabulary go to?"

"Is this necessary?" He put his hand over his heart as if wounded, and I laughed as I threw another piece at him. "Mmmm hmmm, ok." He sat up straight, feet on the floor, placing his bowl of popcorn on the coffee table before he turned to me. I was giggling at his expression, then let out a small squeak as he reached, and ended up wrestling with me for, the bowl of popcorn on my lap.

"Mine!" I yelled trying to pry it from his hands, popcorn spilling everywhere as we continued out tug of war with the bowl. He finally knocked it out of my hands, its contents showering over couch, the floor, coffee table, and us, which had us both laughing uncontrollably… until our positions broke into our consciences.

I was pinned beneath him, his face mere inches from me. Our breathing was in unison, causing our bodies to move together adding to the friction building between us. When he shifted ever so slightly, now resting between my legs that had somehow become parted, our hips in the same general vicinity. Oh, this wasn't good…this wasn't good at all.

He let go of my hands that he had pinned above my head, but didn't move. His eyes were studying me, my features, committing me to memory. My breath caught in my throat as his eyes skimmed over my lips, the pure hunger in his gaze making me weak. 'Don't let him do it, Gabriella,' I kept telling myself. 'He doesn't want to be here, he doesn't want to be with you, don't do it.'

"You have the most beautiful eyes," his voice shot through me. "I've never seen eyes this brown…not like this." I willed myself silent to keep from screaming at him, demanding to know why he would do this, why he wanted to hurt me. One soft kiss, his lips feather light against mine, and all my best intentions were in danger of flying out the window.

I wanted that kiss; hell, I wanted more than that kiss. I wanted clothes off, bodies wrapped together intimately. As he gently teased my lips with his, coaxing a sigh from me that sent a shiver I could feel through him, there was no doubt it was what he wanted too.

But did he want it with me?

I wasn't able to ask, not that I thought for one second I would as our kisses began building in passion. He had one hand on my hip, guiding me as our bodies moved together just as perfectly as they had before, only this time the barrier of clothes was in the way. 'This just…isn't good,' I thought as he kissed a trail down my neck, causing me to gasp with pleasure. 'Now's the time to tell him to stop,' my mind was screaming, but I could only whimper against his lips as he was kissing me again, his hands…everywhere…

And then he stopped. He stopped abruptly, leaning down, burying his face in my hair, taking in long, shuddering breaths. I tried to move but he held me still, his hands so strong against my wrists it was almost an aphrodisiac in and of itself. "Ssssh, please, don't move…I'm so, so sorry." His voice was strained, his words hushed against my skin. "I didn't mean to…start this."

I felt a tear escape my eyes that were shut so tight it hurt. It was nothing compared to my heart that this man seemed to have a habit of breaking. The lone tear slid down past him and I heard him inhale sharply. "God, you must hate me."

No, you asshole, I can't hate you… I can't hate you because I love you, even though you wish I were someone else.

"Gabi…" Oh, he needed to move, not hold me so close, not let me feel his words right up against my skin. He seemed to read my mind and pushed himself slightly up, studying my face, his eyes clouded over. "I'm sorry."

Those two words, from his lips, that had at one time made my heart soar now sent it crashing to the ground.

"I know this isn't what you wanted."

What?

"Don't turn this around on me, Troy." The words didn't sound harsh as I didn't mean them to, but he still drew back further, standing up and running a shaking hand through his hair. He tugged slightly at his jeans, and when I realized it was to readjust my body began to betray me once more. This time, though, my heart was going to prevail.

Silently he began scooping up the mess of popcorn, putting it back in the bowl it had spilled from. I watched him move, his face masked over with an unreadable expression, and I just couldn't take it anymore. Reaching out to him, I touched his arm and he stopped, looking up at me. "I'm not sorry I'm here," he said abruptly, his eyes determined, intense. "I'm here because I want to be, and I don't want you to think differently."

I could feel my body relax at his words, my expression soften. I opened my mouth to speak, but again he had taken my bravado so I merely nodded and dropped my head to hide the new tears springing up in my eyes.

"Hey…"

"You know, the popcorn can wait, we have a marathon to keep watching."

"Yeah, well, you're gonna kill me since I just spilled my beer on your couch," he said as he moved quickly to grab the overturned bottle. I looked at the mess in my living room, then back at Troy….and we just couldn't help ourselves.

We laughed.


	19. Chapter 19

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER NINETEEN**

The television in my bedroom was smaller than my living room set, but it was positioned on my dresser so that I could comfortably watch while propped up in bed. In lieu of sitting on the soaked couch, Troy and I were camped out in my bed, all available pillows stacked behind us.

His confession of sorts, where he'd told me he actually wanted to be there, had eased much of the tension I was feeling. I suppose there is truth in moods being contagious as Troy was also more notably relaxed. I noticed during our next installment that we were watching that Troy really is, for lack of better terms, a very physical person. I'm not saying his hands were all over me or that he was overly sexual in any way—it was the little things. When he knew something hilarious was about to happen, he'd reach over and gently touch me before pointing at the TV and saying, "Oh, watch this." It was as if the invisible barrier that had been up keeping us both guarded had disappeared, freeing us to be ourselves.

Unfortunately for me, it also meant seeing face to face the same man I'd fallen so hard for over the phone.

"You think she would've liked me?" Troy asked suddenly during a commercial break.

"Who, my mom?" I asked and he nodded, turning on his side to face me. I smiled as I turned towards him, leaving us nearly face to face. "She would have loved you."

It was his turn to smile. "Really?"

"She's a sucker for all that charm you B.S. people with."

He pushed my shoulder slightly. "It's not bullshit; I am charming."

"And not cocky in the least." I pushed him back as I said it.

"You're so damn mean to me!"

"You know what she would have loved?" The realization washed over me suddenly, and I had to share it. "Besides the obvious…you know, the whole drool factor."

"Oh, of course," he said with a roll of his eyes.

"Your intelligence, and the fact that you actually put it to use," I continued, ignoring his interjection. "She always said how an articulate man was the most incredible turn on ever, which I must admit, I agree with."

"Oh, really?" he asked slyly, raising an eyebrow.

"It's sexy," I emphasized the word as much as I could. He began laughing in earnest, causing me to add before I thought, "How do you think I fell so hard for you when we'd only spoke on the phone?" Damnit, Gabriella! Think, then speak!

He stopped laughing then, his gaze thoughtful as he looked into my eyes. "I didn't know that," he said softly.

"Oh, come on, yes you did," I disagreed with him. "How could you not know?"

"You never told me." His expression was one of wonder, making my heart flutter.

"I didn't? Are you sure?" I was sure I had to have mentioned it.

"Positive," he replied, adding quickly before I could argue, "You said you found out, and didn't want me to know because you thought I would never speak with you again. That's it, that's all you said." My brow was furrowed in concentration and he gently caressed it with his fingertips.

"Even if I didn't say anything, you had to know. It was obvious."

"How so?" My eyes widened in shock at his question. "Gabi, please…in my position… how could I know?"

"The man, or the rock star," I repeated his words, and his eyes showed I'd hit the point spot on. "Why else would I be so upset, if you… Troy, you…" I touched his chest softly, "if you didn't mean so much to me?"

His smile was sweet, genuine, as he tugged on my shirt and pulled me into a kiss. I was surprised when it happened, but wasn't about to protest as the kiss deepened ever so slightly. He pulled back slowly, that smile still there.

"Anything else you've forgotten to tell me?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah, I'm really a very horrible person, a serial killer, married with kids that I keep in a completely different location… um… Oh, I use you for your body, all that stuff about caring, eh… it's a load of bullshit." He continued grinning like a schoolboy at me. "What?"

He kissed the tip of my nose and went back to his original position, watching the television. When I began to turn also, he stopped me by scooping me up into his arms to lie against his chest. "Comfy?" he asked, his fingertips lightly caressing my back.

"Mmmm, you may not want to do that," I replied, my body relaxing into him, the rhythm of his heart sounding in my ear.

"Is it gonna make you all hot and bothered?" he teased, and I laughed softly, not answering him. "You don't have some ice pick hidden under anything here a la 'Basic Instinct' do you?"

"They're all over the house, didn't you know?"

"Great, that's comforting. What are you doing?"

"Listening to your heart," I breathed, snuggling in.

"You say that like it's something special," he remarked just before I felt him kiss the top of my head.

"It is," I said, and his arms tightened slightly. "I'm happy you're here."

He was quiet for a moment, then I heard him whisper, "I am too."

"Don't you have a plane to catch?" I asked.

"In the morning," he replied. "Why, you want me to go now?"

"Huh uh," I said before attempting to stifle a yawn.

"Are you going to sleep?" he asked.

I don't remember whether or not I answered.


	20. Chapter 20

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY**

I hate nightmares, with a burning fiery passion. There's nothing more disturbing than dreaming that something has happened to someone you care about, let alone dreaming that you're being chased by some deranged lunatic who's trying to kill you.

And why is it that nightmares somehow resemble every single horror movie you've ever seen? The long corridors, the creepy shadows, swearing Jack Nicholson was going to come after you with an ax, or God forbid I dream about being in a shower. This night, however, it was some creepy fucker chasing me in the woods (reminding me to never watch Friday the 13th movies EVER again), and when he caught me from behind I struggled as best I could, feeling as if I was being strangled and smothered all at the same time…

Gentle hands on my skin jolted me out of my terror as they helped me out of the tangled mess that was my shirt. I wondered in a brief moment of panic if this is what caused me to throw my shirt every time, but I was still shaking terribly, grabbing at the arms that were either friend or foe… I was far too groggy to be able to differentiate between reality and dream.

Soft lips touched mine while those arms wrapped themselves around me. It wasn't a hot, passionate kiss; it was one of comfort, calming me as I sighed against him. As the kiss ended I leaned into the strong arms of the man who was trying to keep my heart from bursting in fright. I turned my face into his neck inhaling that familiar scent of his skin fighting the overwhelming urge to kiss that sensitive spot that I had taken advantage of not so long ago. The memory of that low moan in the back of his throat came crashing around me; I couldn't move… I shouldn't do it…

I remembered the taste of his skin, as intoxicating as any aphrodisiac known to man. In that one moment of weakness, my vulnerability tangible, I felt a desperate need for some sort of reassurance not just in myself, but in life; I had to feel alive, and here I was in the arms of the man who made me feel in that one long night that his very existence depended on me.

Shy, almost timid, in my touch I gave into temptation, that devil on my shoulder rejoicing as I began leaving light kisses on his neck, first with just my lips, then teasing softly with my teeth and tongue. I felt his hesitation, his hands moving to my shoulders, then as if I'd found that right spot…I know I had… his hands gripped me closer to him and his head tilted slightly back giving me perfect access. As we sat there close to my edge of the bed holding one another, I received instant gratification from his labored breathing, his attempt of restraining himself. There were no doubts how much he wanted this every bit as much as I did as I moved to straddle him, finally kissing those perfect lips as I pressed myself up against him.

I cradled his face in my hands, reveling in the feel of his skin as our kisses gained passion, his responses as I moved my hips ever so slightly fueling my overwhelming desire. My hands moved of their own volition to his shirtfront, my fingers surprisingly steady as I continued my quest, needing to feel skin on skin. Somehow I had become the queen of multitasking this night as our mouths didn't lose contact until just as I pushed him back slightly to push his shirt off his shoulders. He didn't stop me, his eyes searching mine for intent, his arms moving slightly as I pulled the shirt completely off and dropped it beside the bed.

"Gabi…I don't know…" His voice trailed off as my hands went behind my back, unhooking and discarding my bra swiftly. An audible sigh came from both of us as I pressed myself up against him once more, the sensation of such close contact inducing another onslaught of kisses, given and taken with pure abandon. His hands gripped my hips roughly, pulling me closer, as he growled deep in his throat.

'No, sir,' I thought to myself, 'not this time…'

This time, I was in control.

I grabbed his hands, pulling them off of me, and he abruptly pulled back. Visibly attempting to regain control of his breathing, his chest rising and falling rapidly, I wondered for a brief moment if this was wise. Then, he looked at me…straight through me… His eyes were the most brilliant blue at that moment in the glow from the hall light that somehow had been left on, his lips slightly parted, almost begging to be kissed. His expression was unreadable though, as he possibly thought I was stopping what I had begun.

He couldn't have been more wrong.

Placing my hands on his shoulders I nudged slightly, silently telling him to lie back. As he lay there, looking up at me curiously, a sly smile touched my lips. I grabbed his wrists then, pinning them above his head as I leaned in to continue my mission that I had embarked upon. He laughed softly in the back of his throat as we both knew my holding onto his wrists was merely a metaphor; he could easily flip me over and do exactly as he pleased, he'd already proven so.

I silenced his laughter with a trail of kisses, releasing his wrists as I moved slowly, meticulously down his body the way he had done before with me. I could feel one of his hands softly playing with my hair as I followed that happy trail, pausing to undo his jeans, kneeling beside the bed as I slowly pulled the rest of his clothes off him. I nibbled and kissed my way up his thighs, taking my pleasure from every gasp and moan that came from him. I vowed to myself that before I was through he was going to know, as I had learned from him, what it was like to lose all control. At one point, glancing over, I happened to see his fist clenched in the covers, veins prominent in his arm as if trying to stop what I was trying to make inevitable.

Seemingly on cue, his hands tangled themselves in my hair and he was pulling me up, back on top of him as his mouth was working its magic on the most sensitive places of my neck. I smiled in triumph as he roughly pushed me onto my back, his hands trembling as he urgently pulled at the button of my jeans, then without pulling the zipper completely down his hand was reaching between my legs.

'I'm ready,' I wanted to say, but found myself unable to as his fingers continued working their magic. His hand left briefly and my eyes fluttered open just in time to see him expertly grab both jeans and panties, pulling them completely off and leaving them on the floor as he crawled back up the bed to me. Still wanting to be in control, I began to sit up only to be pushed back as he grabbed my hips and pulled me to him. I couldn't contain my soft cry as he pushed me back into the mattress, his weight fully on me, filling me completely the way only he could. All restraint was gone as we moved together, already close to the edge before either of us had started. I heard the headboard crack and splinter as it crashed against the wall behind it, followed quickly by the moans of pleasure as we both lost all semblance of control, going over the edge together with our hands grasped so tightly it was going to hurt to let go.

Wrapped in his embrace afterwards, our breathing returning to normal, we were drifting back into peaceful sleep. I could feel myself smiling softly in spite of his impending departure. He kissed my shoulder softly…was that a tear I felt? No, it couldn't be.

As he sighed softly, I almost swore I heard him whisper, "Please don't be sorry."

The morning sun was in my eyes as he sat up, glancing at the clock. He shook my shoulder softly, whispering "Gabi?" in my ear. I smiled sleepily, grabbed a pillow and hit him with it.

"I can't sleep?"

"No, you can't…unless you want me to catch a cab. I can, you know."

Ouch.

"No, I'm up," I said, rolling over. "How long do I have to get ready?"

"An hour."

"An HOUR? Shesh, how long do you think it takes me?"

"Not that long…" Oh, God. The dreaded words were coming. "We…um, well, we… could get some breakfast, to go or something, on the way." I smiled at him then.

"I'll be ready before you know it." I sat up, holding the sheet around me. "Just let me shower, k?"

"Got it." He was smiling, too, but he looked almost sad. He walked to my doorway and looked back briefly. "You don't hate me, do you?"

What the hell kind of question is that?

I threw another pillow at him in response, shaking my head at his nonsense while I got my things together.

He was looking through a small notebook while I was driving him back to the hotel. We had grabbed breakfast sandwiches through a drive thru, and his sat beside him nearly untouched as he flipped through page after page. He stopped only to switch the radio station, which once again was playing his latest hit.

"Thank God this tour is almost over," he muttered, closing his eyes and laying his head back. "I need a break."

"Will you actually get one?" I asked, welcoming the conversation to the uneasy silence.

"Kind of," he replied. "I've been jotting down ideas, and I do want to get back into the studio. I just need time to breathe, so much has happened." He looked over at me, studying my face as I drove. "You've kept me sane through this, you know. I really appreciate that." I smiled at him, still troubled by his tone. "Can… can I still call you?"

We were at a red light now, and I looked over at him, unable to mask the hurt in my eyes. "Troy…why…" I took a deep breath, afraid of the answer. "Why the hell would you ask that? And why are you…"

He smiled, leaning over and kissing me on the lips lightly. "Just checking," he said, his cheeky grin firmly on his face. I rolled my eyes and continued driving.

In the parking garage of his hotel, I pulled in the spot closest to the private elevators. Before I was able to shut the car off, he reached over and touched my arm gently.

"Please…don't hate me, Gabriella. I have to go to the airport alone, you know, with all the damn… paparazzi and shit, I just can't…"

"Stop, stop, I understand," I cut him off, smiling at him. "I do need to get going; I actually have to get a few things done before I go back to work tomorrow." He smiled at my understanding and leaned in to kiss me sweetly.

"So I can't call you tonight?"

"Of course you can, Dork." Then, with a wink and one more kiss, he got out of the car and walked over to the elevator. He turned back to give a slight wave before the doors closed.

I could feel the slight distance between us, but before I had a chance for it to creep into my mind I saw his notebook on the floorboard. I turned off the car, knowing I had to take it to the front desk.

The lobby was bustling with more traffic than usual, so it was easy for anyone to blend right in. I walked towards the front desk, standing behind a rather large businessman, ready to leave the notebook with them to give back to Troy. The woman ahead of him was dressed simply, beautifully, with the most gorgeous dark tresses falling across her shoulders.

"Please, just ring room 612 again," she was saying.

That was Troy's room. Was this some reporter?

"And when he answers, let him know it's Jessica Carter. He's expecting me."


	21. Chapter 21

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE**

I backed away from the counter slowly, clutching the notebook to my chest. My mind was racing, my heart pounding, my eyes welling with tears. Jessica Carter. She was beautiful. Perfect. Immaculate. When the concierge told her he would be right down, my heart was telling me to run as fast as I could.

This was her…his first love, his first everything. This was the woman on his mind all day yesterday, the one he was so happy to be finally talking about. And he was expecting her? Why? Wasn't his plane leaving shortly, isn't that why he had me drop him off here?

"Carter!" I heard Troy's voice booming through the lobby, causing several patrons to turn. That beautiful, perfect, immaculate raven-haired goddess dressed in royal blue was swept up into his arms, my heart shattering as he swung her around.

Troy had obviously just stepped out of the shower and had hastily dressed, his damp hair hanging limply until he ran his hands through it. "Sorry, I was just getting out of the shower when I heard the phone." Of course he was in the shower, he was washing away all evidence of me.

There were so many people around that I could blend in easily, but I don't think for one second it would have mattered if I had a neon sign over my head announcing my presence. I could hear their voices floating towards me as they walked hand-in-hand to the private elevators.

"Albuquerque, New Mexico…why here, Troy?"

"I was…just…you know, taking a break." He was nervously looking around. Did he think he saw me? "I moved my flight to this evening; we have all day."

I sunk onto the oversized couch, my hopes shattered.

Why had I had any hopes to begin with? He had made some half-assed attempt to stop me the night before. I was the one who had said he needed to be sure he was over her, and yet I had initiated everything.

Knowing I had no one to blame but me, I ran to the parking garage, notebook still in hand.

"What the hell happened here?" Kelsi asked as she arrived about two minutes after she'd called from her cell to tell me she was on her way over. "Or do I need to ask?"

"No, that was upstairs," I muttered, but I don't think she heard me as she was surveying the damage in my living room.

"I'll call Sharpay and see if we can get her upholstery cleaner," she volunteered.

"I forgot she had one…yeah, that would be great." My answer sounded almost robotic, no emotion to my voice whatsoever.

"Have you been watching too much Ben Stein?" she joked, then hugged me briefly. "These past few days have been hell for you, hun. Let me help with this. Damn, how does the bedroom look?"

I thought of the bed: its covers in disarray, the headboard in need of replacing, the hole in the wall behind it.

"Bedroom's fine; I'll get it," I replied. Once again, I was numb. And once again it was no one's fault but my own.

"As soon as we're done here you need some rest," she suggested. "You look like hell."

"I feel like hell," I said with a shrug.

"You didn't leave on bad terms again, did you?"

"He's going to call," I responded, and I truly believed he would. Did I believe he was going to be honest with me? No.

"That's good, right? You're talking, you're working this out, you'll at least be friends in the end."

I sat in my papasan chair resting my head in my hands, not listening to much else that she was saying, begging for some peace in my life.

Three hours of intense cleaning couldn't purge my mind of the vision in the hotel lobby. It didn't help that the last hour of it I spent in my bedroom, changing the sheets…hell, I changed the whole comforter set. I just couldn't lie down and inhale the scent of him on any of it, so whether it was dirty or not, it was off my bed. I made a note to call the furniture stores in the morning before my shift, and also made a call to Taylor's husband Chad to see if he could patch the hole in my wall.

I had to erase… everything.

As I pulled the covers around me, smelling only faint traces of Downey, I fought the temptation to unplug my phone. Hell, at this point he'd just call my cell anyways. He had no idea that I knew.

I glanced at my dresser, the notebook sat there, unread by me. Again with my insecurities; Troy was known for writing straight from his heart, and I didn't want to intrude for fear of being hurt further. Not that the temptation wasn't there, because I'd be lying if I said I hadn't sat in my papasan chair for a good thirty minutes just staring at it. My mind once again overruled my heart; I placed the notebook on my dresser, and there it stayed.

Drifting off into a fitful sleep that evening, I had resigned myself to him not calling. I had overheard him, after all, tell Jessica Carter that he had moved his flight to spend time with her. Hell, he may have even bumped it to the next day; he may be in his bed right now doing things with her that he had done with me a mere 24 hours before.

The phone jolted me awake, the numbers on the clock giving away who was on the other line before I ever answered. I stared at the receiver for a brief moment, contemplating what to do, my head screaming at my heart as I grabbed it at the last possible moment.

"Hello?"

"At least you're being nice enough to not do that whole breathless thing you've got going on; I'd have to hop the plane and head right back there."

"Liar," I said, and he laughed not realizing how serious I was.

"Okay, so they'd have my ass if I did. But, see? I called you, just like I said I would."

"How was your flight?" I asked. 'Besides later in the day,' I wanted to add, but decided I needed to hear it from him.

"Eh, uneventful," he replied. "But hey, I have a question for you…and it sounds odd because this couldn't have been you, but…I mean, a few years ago, like high school era… I met this girl at a hospital back home…Nah, never mind, it couldn't have been you. Her mother was terminally ill, and, uh…you just lost her."

Painful memories came crashing down around me of my father suffering, the rest of the family adamant that we try to get him cured rather than let him go in peace.

Among those memories were of a boy with the most beautiful eyes, a boy who had only told me his first name as we shared stories of our reasons for being there, only I hadn't been honest because I was so, so angry…

Noooooooo. No way…

"In Florida?" I asked, my voice small.

"I mean, I know that your name isn't all that popular, but this was Florida and you're from New Mexico, so…"

"You used to call me, in the room, play phone tag late at night," I cut him off. He was silent for a while, his breathing steady, and I wondered if he was as bewildered at this change of events as I was.

"God, Gabriella, I'm so…sorry. I just feel like such an ass, I mean… after…um…"

"The orderly room?" I asked, smiling softly as I recalled how even all those years ago we had sought comfort in each other. "Hey, it's not like I put two and two together."

"Yeah, but… it took you five weeks to figure out this was me, and I had you pegged with one sentence."

"Bite me," I shot back, my automatic response.

"Gladly."

Ah, hell. That was a new one from him. Figures he'd leave me speechless, even if only for a moment.

"At least we didn't sleep together back then, because I'd really feel like an ass, or more so than I do now."

"As well you should," I said softly.

"Hey, you didn't know either!" he exclaimed with a laugh, not realizing what I was referring to.

Remembering back to that night in the orderly room (I still don't know if that's what it really was), I also recalled a beautiful dark haired girl interrupting us. The realization of who it was hit me like a ton of bricks. God, and he dated her back then, he was probably cheating on me with her at that moment!

"So…you've actually sort of met Jess," he happened to throw out there, neither confirming nor denying my suspicions of the extent of their relationship at the time. "If you…remember."

Of course I do, and she was even more beautiful now.

"Vaguely," I said, and it wasn't exactly a lie. I had blocked so much of that experience, that whole time period out of my head that I didn't think for one second that the elusive Troy who drifted in and out of my life was the same one who had ended up in my bed.

"I just… I wanted to know if it was you, and now I do, and… it kind reaffirms the whole theory of being right where you're supposed to be. I know, it would make much more sense if I'd had some sleep."

"What made you think of it?" I asked, and he paused for just a beat too long.

"It just… crossed my mind."

Gah! Bullshit, Bolton, your ex-girlfriend would remember the name of the person she caught you cheating with and exactly what she looked like!

A part of me felt vindicated to have been included in the conversation, as I was sure I had to be for this memory to have suddenly reappeared. The other part of me wondered if he was explaining to her that I was 'just a friend.'

"Thought you said you'd never seen eyes this shade of brown before," I commented, and he laughed nervously.

"I have no witty retort for that one," he admitted.

"So… what other kinds of adventures have you had today, other than some form of epiphany of our past relationship that really wasn't."

"Nothing, honest," he said slowly. "Gabi, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, don't worry about me." Automatic response again, the same one that had given my identity away.

"I do worry." I sighed into the phone, wanting so badly to curse at him and make him tell me the truth. "Ah, hell, I just remembered… I can't find my notebook, did I happen to leave it in the car?"

I glanced over at the notebook sitting on my dresser, taunting me with its unread pages and the truth that it had inadvertently caused me to see.

"Yes you did," I replied.

"Oh… Um… Did you read it?"

"Should I?" I asked, curious about the cautious tone in his voice.

"I suppose I couldn't stop you if it was what you wanted to do."

"But you rather I didn't." It was more of a statement than a question.

"It's… personal, Gabi, that's all."

"Do you want me to send it to you?" I asked. I hated how short I was being with him, but I felt justified. Why show any other emotion when I knew he was just sitting there, lying to me?

"No, I'm…not really comfortable with that. Um…Kelsi, she's going to see Ryan soon, could you send it with her?"

"Sure."

"Gabriella…"

"Is there anything else? I mean, anything you're not telling me?"

His silence spoke volumes to me.

"You know, forget it…I was just… ignorant for thinking that our talk about honesty was anything but a load of bullshit."

"Wait just a damn minute, Gabriella," his tone was defensive, setting off my anger even more. "We didn't sit there and say we were going to divulge every minute of our lives to one another, nor did we say either one of us had the right to demand it."

"Right, fine, I get the picture."

"No, I don't think you do," he continued, his voice rising just slightly. "I told you there are…things in my life, questions, that I need answers to, and those answers aren't always right in front of me. If you recall correctly that is one conversation we HAVE had." Heat flooded my face as I remembered one of our very first conversations that we'd had, back in the days when things were so simple that we hadn't exchanged names. "And just… just last night, you told me that…it was okay, and you…weren't going anywhere."

"So you can string me along while you have your ex girlfriend meet you in your hotel?"

"Fuuuuuck!" The explicative was drawn out and I could almost swear I heard something crash in his room. "Damn, fucking paparazzi…"

"It wasn't paparazzi, Troy, I was in the lobby."

His tirade stopped immediately.

"I was there to return your notebook, I was there when you told her you'd rearranged your schedule, I was THERE."

"And your perception of the situation wasn't exactly objective, was it?"

"Perhaps it would have been if you hadn't lied to me."

"Gabriella, I didn't lie to you, where the hell did you get that from?"

"Omission, whatever it is you wish to call it."

"Jees, Gabriella, this is personal! Did you think last night gave you the right to…" He stopped himself, adding "I'm sorry…I'm so sorry."

"No, you said exactly what you meant to say," I replied, the tears falling freely.

"No, please don't cry," I heard him whisper, wondering if he meant for me to actually hear it.

"I know you didn't want to sleep with me, Troy, I know."

"That's not…entirely true." His voice was shaky now. "I just didn't want…this. This is what we were trying to avoid."

"And yet, here we are."

"God, I hate this." He paused and I heard him pop the top of what I assumed was a beer. "This…right now, we shouldn't be like…"

"But we are." I wiped a few tears away before I continued. "It's this whole rollercoaster that I just…can't deal with. I can't deal with…"

"What you consider dishonesty?"

"A bit hypocritical, isn't it?"

"I'd be lying if I said 'no,'" His words tore through me like a knife. "You want honesty now, you've got it. Just don't think this means you will hear every small detail; I'm not…ready. I'm just not."

"I'm fairly certain I know everything I need to know now."

"If that's the way you feel." His tone was guarded, even. I wished for a brief moment I could see his face, reach out and touch him, show him just how much my heart was breaking.

"How do you feel?" I asked, closing my eyes tight as I waited for his answer.

"Confused."

"And I'm not helping the situation any," I added, and when he didn't answer I assumed it was the truth. "I'm sorry, I'll let you go."

"Gabi, wait."

"Not tonight, Troy, please."

"Ok, then… until later?" This time it was more of a question. When I didn't answer right away, I heard a faint whispered, "Please."

My heart melting just a fraction more, I said the only thing I could. "Of course."

Lying in my bed watching the minutes tick away before my alarm would start screaming at me, I felt compelled to read that entire notebook of his, every personal lyric, thought, every little note written in the margins. This time the angel on my shoulder told the devil to piss off, and the notebook sat untouched for the next week.


	22. Chapter 22

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO**

"Where did that dress come from?" Moira was asking. I was cleaning out my closet for the clothing drive that her middle school was sponsoring. "That's, like… my size!"

"No, Tinkerbell, this is NOT your size," I corrected her. "This…well, I wore this when I was a teenager."

"Your butt would hang out of it!"

"It so did not hang out of it," I said. "Not that it didn't try to. I couldn't bend over much, see."

"Or look down because it probably pushed your boobs up to your chin." She was still eyeballing the dress which I quickly snatched out of her hands.

"No, it actually fit…very nicely. See the fabric? It hugs, it doesn't push."

I had loved that dress. Believe it or not, back in high school I actually really enjoyed wearing tight clothes, playing the curls up, wearing the make up. I liked the attention, mostly because it took my mind off of everything else. I remembered briefly that I'd worn it when Dad died, just to make my older sister Lisa angry. My, oh my, how the explicatives flew that night. Lucky for me I had also gotten into her stash of anti-anxiety meds and taken my fair share of them. I was too numb to care.

"Um…Aunt Gabi… can I take this or not?"

"Your mother would kill me. You know, since I'm not dumb enough to think you'd put this in the donation box," I had to add before she interrupted me.

"But…it's not like I have your boobs or your butt either."

"Ouch, thanks," I said, crinkling my nose up as I placed that little black dress back in my closet.

"That was a compliment, Dork," she countered, throwing a wadded up piece of paper at me.

"Hey, I think we found just about all of the clothes you were looking for," Taylor said walking into the bedroom. "Ohhhh, the dress. You still have that?"

"It holds fond memories," I replied, just a hint of sarcasm in my voice.

"That's the epitome of a fuck me dress, though…no repeating that Moira," Taylor commented.

"I have you know I never once got laid while wearing that dress…and don't even say it, you know what I mean." I pointed at her, raising my eyebrow in a mock veiled threat. "That dress has never made me…well, lucky."

"I say keep it, take it with you when you have to go to your seminar," Taylor suggested. I gave her the 'you've got to be kidding me' look, and she continued. "Hey, what happens in Vegas, right? Besides, Kelsi will be out there doing the tattoo convention, and you have that hot Cardiac doctor going with you guys too."

"He's not going with us per se," I corrected her. "He's speaking at the seminar."

"So when you all go out, you wear the black dress, and have the time of your life…right, Mom?" Moira asked, looking over at Taylor for approval.

"Absolutely," Taylor agreed.

"Not on your life," I said, closing my closet door.

"Hellooooo is anyone in here?" I heard Kelsi call out as she was letting herself in.

"No, not a soul," I replied loudly as she took the stairs and came into the bedroom. "You're leaving tonight, right?"

"Yeah, I'm heading out there for a couple of days, see the sights, you know," Kelsi said with a shrug.

"Yeah, like you and Ryan are gonna do sight seeing," Taylor joked, and Kelsi merely shrugged.

"I'm all about the adventure. Speaking of adventure, I know you have a room at some stuffy place on the outskirts of Vegas that the hospital pays for, but you're so staying with me at the Hard Rock," she said, pointing at me.

"Oh, my heart's broken," I quipped, handing her Troy's notebook, still unread. She immediately began flipping through the pages. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"Who the hell is Jess? And this stuff is…look at the dates, it's old," she commented, and I tried in vain to get the notebook from her. "What, like you haven't read this?"

"No, I haven't, and you shouldn't either," I said sternly, trying to get it from her.

"God, this guy was a little man-whore," Kelsi continued, ignoring me as I threw my hands up in frustration. "Niiiice, all of this… 'I was thinking about you the whole time,' Oh, make me gag."

I just…didn't need to hear that.

"Look at this!" Kelsi exclaimed, and Taylor walked beside her and read along. "It's lyrics and shit…I recognize this one from his first record."

"This guy wrote all this stuff about ex's to some chick?" Moira asked, perplexed. "Why would he do that?"

"Stay out of it, please." I snatched the book away from them then. I don't know if I was too heartsick to hear anymore, or if I wanted to avoid the possibility that I was in this notebook, too.

"Very overprotective of someone who's just a friend," Taylor commented, her eyebrow raised.

That was the story I told all of them, and I omitted the part where I had actually been acquainted with Troy back during the hellish time my father was being experimented on, forced to live past the time he should have been able to go in peace. I had never even told them about the boy with the beautiful eyes to begin with, and quite honestly so much of that period was gone from my life, wiped clean from my mind.

"Anyhoooo, is it pizza time yet?" Moira asked.

"Sharpay should be here any time now with it," Kelsi answered, and as they busied themselves in their world of gossip I walked downstairs, holding onto the elusive notebook.

Was I in there?

Fifteen minutes I flipped through those pages. They were dated, numbered, sometimes categorized. It wasn't as if I was reading all of his declarations of love for Jess, I was simply looking for mention of me. I don't know what I expected, if anything at all, especially since he didn't exactly recognize me… or did he?  
_  
'You remind me of someone,' _he had said in his hotel room.

His eyes had nearly glowed when the girls called me 'Gabi'.

I had reached all the way to the back of this notebook. Nothing.

Fucking nothing.

No wonder he didn't want me to read it.

"Pizza was fantastic, as per usual," Moira said, licking her fingers.

"I suppose this is in lieu of girl's night this week?" Sharpay asked. This was a rarity, and hopefully not a sign of things to come, not when I needed them the most.

"I'm sorry, I'm just not up to it," Taylor admitted.

"I'll be…"

"Busy," we finished for Kelsi, who grinned sheepishly.

"What about you, Gabriella?" Sharpay looked at me, her smile genuine.

What about me? I was going to be here in this apartment all by myself wishing I hadn't fallen in love with a man who was so obviously in love with someone else.

"I need to get some rest before my double on Saturday," I lied. Truth be told, I wasn't ready to go out and paint the town.

"Yes, but in two weeks, Vegas baby!" Kelsi exclaimed, and we clinked our glasses together.

"I will be there for a seminar, though, so…"

"Afterwards we get your ass drunk and let you sleep on the company-paid trip home," she cut me off.

"Okay, arm twisted," I said, although my heart wasn't quite behind the words.

"She's taking her little black dress," Moira spoke up.

"I'm so not taking that!"

"And the hot Cardiac doc is gonna be there," Taylor added.

"Dr. Craig?" Sharpay asked, and I nodded.

"He's not…that hot." Okay, that was a lie, he was completely hot, but I wasn't into him.

"Are you blind? Or just blinded by the Sex Voice still?" Sharpay asked, her eyes wide as she looked at me.

"I haven't heard from Sex Voice in a…week," I replied, my head held high.

"A week? Has he been that busy?" Taylor asked, looking between Kelsi and me for an answer. Kelsi threw up her hands.

"Paint me red and white and call me Switzerland, I know nothing."

"Translation: she loves me, but really enjoys screwing his brother," I was actually able to semi-joke, which made the older girls laugh and Moira stick her fingers in her ears and sing-song "La la la la la". The phone ringing interrupted our much-needed laughter, and I answered without really looking at the number. "Hello?" I said between giggles.

"What the hell is so funny?" Perhaps Troy was taking advantage of my supposed good mood by trying to keep the conversation light, but that overwhelming rollercoaster feeling in my stomach made me stop laughing. "Oh…um…I'm sorry, is this a bad time?"

"We were just talking about Kelsi…and your_ brother_," I stressed the last word, throwing a piece of pepperoni at her.

"Hi, Troy," the girls sing-songed. He laughed softly.

"It's not Friday, is this an early Girls Night?" he asked.

"That is on hiatus this week," I replied, still feeling odd having idle chitchat with him. I motioned to the girls that I would be back and headed upstairs for some privacy.

"Is everything alright? Are…you, are you alright?" He sounded so sincere I couldn't bring myself to give a hateful reply. I opted instead for the usual.

"I'm fine, don't worry about me."

"I…haven't heard from you," he continued.

"I haven't heard from you either, Troy."

"Touché," he replied, a small laugh. "I guess I've tortured myself long enough and needed my fix."

"Nice one, Troy. I'm a fix now?" Damn him for making me grin in spite of my heart breaking.

"What can I say? You're addictive." I laughed at that.

"The shit's getting deep in here."

"But you laughed…laughing is good."

"Kelsi has your notebook," I said, trying to steer the conversation from anything too personal. "She's taking it with her when she sees Ryan."

"Alright," he responded, still trying to keep his voice light. "Did you read it?"

"Did you expect me to?"

"I don't know what to expect from you anymore." Gah! Was he doing this on purpose? Okay, that was a stupid question, but damn, did it have to hurt so much?

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked.

"No, not always. Sometimes I'm pleasantly surprised." I blushed in spite of myself, remembering how I had turned to him the last night he was here.

"And other times you want to pull your hair out," I added for him, and he laughed.

"I'm not going to say no, but…" He drew in a deep breath, just like he always seemed to do as he contemplated whether or not it was wise to continue the conversation.

"But what, Troy?"

"I don't want to fight with you tonight, I… don't like fighting with you. And…" He paused, which didn't help my heart that was pounding madly. "And I don't like the fact that it bothers me."

A part of me wanted to scream that I felt the same way; the same part of me wanted to beg him to come back so we could talk about this face to face. Knowing I couldn't do either, I tried to remain rational and calm.

"Hence the confusion?" I asked.

"Funny how I knew you'd understand," he said. "At least I think you do."

"I'm trying."

"That's all I'm asking from you."

"I think that's about all you've asked from me," I commented. "Ever."

"Then…it's settled." His voice was still calm, controlled. "I'll let you get back to the girls now. Give me a call, when you're ready."

"Okay."

"Until later?" he asked.

"Of course." One small click, and the line was clear.

I sat there for a moment, remembering our last night together. I remembered his arms around me, that soft sweet kiss on my shoulder. Then I remembered those words he whispered as we were drifting off to sleep.

My brain, my whole conscience was screaming at me as my fingers made quick work of a memorized number.

"What took you so long?" was how he answered the phone.

"I'm not sorry."

He knew exactly what I meant.


	23. Chapter 23

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE**

Two hours before I was supposed to leave for the airport, Kelsi was in my apartment helping me pack. "This…just isn't you to procrastinate this way!" she exclaimed.

"There's a lot that just isn't me anymore," I admitted in a near panic. "Where is my itinerary? Dr. Craig said I had to have it because it has all the confirmation numbers on it."

"You know, I've heard the expression of screwing someone's brain out, but I had no idea that Troy had actually done that to you. Hey! Ow!" I hit her rather hard with a throw pillow that I was still holding in my hand, ready to strike again.

"I need to focus."

"Shall we put on the Karate Kid so you can remember the way of Mr. Miagi?" I pulled the pillow back to hit her once more and she screeched, "I'm kidding!" She reached over, prying the pillow from me. "Easy, crusher. Let's just think here; where do you remember having it last?"

I had to roll my eyes at what is right up there as one of the most asinine questions on the face of this planet. "If I knew that it wouldn't be lost, would it?" She stood there for a moment, contemplating.

"Okay, point made. So…let's just go through and make sure you are packed completely, then we'll worry about the itinerary." I took in a deep breath and nodded.

"I should have been ready days ago," I muttered under my breath. I had lost so much motivation, not even looking forward to this trip to Vegas as I should. Sure, it meant I had two long days of lectures, or classes, and it was imperative that I keep up with my Continuing Education Credits. Ok, it also meant that one of my travel partners was none other than the hottest doctor in the entire state of New Mexico (who, of course, knew he was hot, much to my chagrin). Most importantly for my sanity it meant the gypsy of the group was all up for a Vegas vacation, and she promised me she'd make sure I had the time of my life in the town I'd never set foot in before. Ah, yes. Uptight Gabriella was back; the Gabriella who watched those 'What Happens in Vegas' commercials and swore she'd never go.

"I thought you were packing that dress!" Kelsi commented, looking through my bags.

"I thought you had more sense than that," I replied, looking through my makeup bag, thinking maybe I had put the itinerary in there. Why not? I could swear I'd looked everywhere else.

"Bring this, and those hot black pumps," she tried convincing me, but I was saved from yet another retort by the phone. I walked quickly across the room to get the receiver, thinking it may be Dr. Craig who was arranging for us to be picked up.

"Hello?" I asked as I picked up the phone. I heard a soft sigh on the other end, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up.

Oh, I knew that sigh.

"Damnit, Gabriella, quit doing that to me."

"Well…you call, I'm in a rush and a panic, that's your fault, not mine." It reads much meaner than it sounded, and he was laughing at me.

"Rush and panic? Oh, this is great. What did you lose now?"

"Hey! I… resent that." I was moving everything around on my dresser, cradling the phone between my ear and shoulder.

"Breathe, Gabriella. Just breathe. What did you lose?"

"You're hundreds of miles away, I hardly think you can help me find it." Thankfully he understood me when I got this frazzled and never took it personally.

"Can I try?" Oh, that was too damn cute for words. The fucker.

"Sure," I played along. "I cannot find my itinerary."

"Itinerary?"

"See? Told you that you couldn't help me. It has all of my confirmation numbers and the passes for the seminars with it."

"Oh, that? Weren't you making fun of it last time you were on the phone with me?"

Well, huh. Fucking smarty-pants a few hundred miles away could remember that, but couldn't remember to tell me his ex was coming to meet him at his hotel when he was here. If he had been in striking distance, I would have taken my best shot.

"Gabriella?"

"Well yes, I was. But, so? What good does that do me now?"

"Weren't you in your walk-in closet, going through that little chest in there? Speaking of which, damn woman you have more clothes than most Hollywood bitches I know."

"Bitches, charming…walk-in closet?" I was walking listening to him trying to be his witty self and make me laugh. Kelsi was stuffing something into my bag as I passed her, completely trusting that she was grabbing an item off my list that I had missed. I walked to the back of the closet, pulling some clothes forward on the rack as I kept moving.

Well, I'll be damned.

"Is there some kind of hidden camera that you put in here?" I interrupted Mr. I'm-Too-Sexy-For-Words as he had continued poking fun at my insane amount of clothing that I never wore.

"Well… no, but thanks for the suggestion. Next time I'm out, we can arrange that."

"Very funny, you insufferable tease."

"Insufferable tease… is this your way of getting around to telling me that I was right?"

"Right about what?" I asked, grabbing the itinerary and passes, handing them to Kelsi before I lost them again.

"I was, and you weren't going to tell me!"

"Why should I tell you, so you can throw it in my face?" He laughed then…one of his real laughs, one that showed me we were making some sort of progress.

"I could throw something in your face, Gabriella Christine, but it would be ungentlemanly of me to do so."

"Easy, Bolton," I said, garnering another laugh from him.

"So…um," he was getting his laughter under control, "this seminar, when is it?"

"I'm leaving in less than two hours," I replied.

"Ah," was all he said to that. "Well, damn, I was gonna see if you were busy but I guess that answers my question."

My heart fluttered for just a brief moment, until he continued.

"I mean, I know you're busy and all, I just know that…well, this weekend, this whole weekend, I… have a lot riding on it, and I don't want to impose with any…phone calls and such if you're busy."

Sure, pal.

"I'll have my cell," I said, wanting to kick myself afterwards. "What's happening this weekend? I thought your next show was Wednesday."

"It is…and I can't… I mean, I…"

"…can't talk about it," I finished for him. I was walking downstairs then, giving the rest of the apartment the once-over while still on the phone with him.

"Forgive me?"

"Some day," I answered honestly. "Listen, I have to go." I could have stayed on the phone just a little while longer, but some wounds were still too fresh.

"Okay." He sounded disappointed, but I couldn't give in. I had to protect my heart somehow. "When will you be back?"

"Monday afternoon, but I told you I'll have my cell."

"I'll remember that…you know, just in case."

"If you need reinforcements," I said softly.

That was the way our conversations the past two weeks had gone; he'd make a few off-handed comments, and then proceed to tell me how much our friendship meant to him, in some way or other. Part of me was genuinely happy to have him in my life, another part of me longed for him to feel the same way I did. Avoiding the issue instead, we skirted around it as he tried to figure out exactly what it was that his heart wanted. And, like the fool I'd become for him, I waited.

An hour and a half had passed since we hung up when the taxi pulled up. Kelsi was chiding me because I'd insisted that we be outside waiting for it. "This way, we know we have everything," I explained.

"You know, I can't wait to get your ass to Vegas, get you drunk, and make you forget all about the insanity that is Troy Bolton."

She had the best of intentions, she really did.

We all know what they say about the best of intentions, don't we?


	24. Chapter 24

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR**

"Explain to me again why it's so important that we're flying in at night." All drinks had been discarded, trays folded down, and seats were in their upright positions. Kelsi had sweet-talked a fellow nurse of mine on her way to the same seminar into switching seats so that she could sit beside me. She even had the nerve to force me to take the window seat, which I hated.

"Just…trust me." This phrase was getting old. "Dr. Craig was an absolute doll to work it out this way, you know? Mmmm, he's actually a doll regardless."

"I see nothing, Kelsi," I replied, ignoring her last comment. "That's all I see… nothing."

"No, seriously, keep watching. It's gonna look like…like…well, like Disney World threw up in the middle of the desert."

Before I could even shoot her the incredulous look that she knew had to be coming, right before my eyes…there it was. A mass of colorful lights strung out below, one large beam shooting straight up to the sky. I suppose my eyes widened a bit because Kelsi let out a short laugh.

"Can you just feel it?" she asked.

"I think that's turbulence," I replied without thinking. She leaned over and whispered in my ear.

"That's your life about to change."

McCarren Airport itself was impressive. The first thing that hit me once I'd adjusted to being on the ground was the sound of bells—over and over, ringing and chiming. The lights were blinding, the air humming with excitement as all around me people were losing themselves in the great art of indulgence.

I certainly was not going to be one of them.

"Hello, ladies, did you enjoy your flight?" Dr. Craig in all his tall dark and handsomeness stood before us, an easy grin on his face.

"Not as much as your first-class self did, but yes," Kelsi replied, and he laughed. Wow, he had a nice laugh too.

"I am told I need to thank you for having us fly over at night time, Dr. Craig," I said to him, my formal self as was the norm those days.

"Gabriella, we're in Vegas. Unless I'm behind that podium, the name is John, got it?"

"Sure," I muttered, not paying much attention as I was staring all around me.

"You know what she needs, Dr. Crai…er, John," Kelsi spoke up, a big cheese-eating grin on her face.

"I'll be right back," he said to her before going off in his own direction.

"Don't we need to wait?" I asked her, and she shook her head, half-dragging me to the luggage section. Apparently someone else was already there gathering all of our luggage for us, the other nurses chatting the poor fellow up.

"Dr. Craig's things should be on that rack as well," Kelsi said to the employee in blue as she grabbed her bag.

"And yours?" the young bespectacled man asked.

"Nah, I'm at a different hotel," Kelsi answered.

"Well, for everyone here for the Cardiac Seminar, your shuttle is waiting outside. I will take your luggage out there."

"Do you have your cell on?" Kelsi asked me, and I nodded right about the time Dr. Craig returned, two VERY large drinks in his hands.

"No dice," he said to Kelsi. "But…" He handed me one of the large sweet smelling concoctions. My first guess was margarita, but I was uneasy to take a drink. "That will do for now."

"What will do? And for now what?" I asked, confused.

"Drink up, I'll be by to get you in about an hour," Kelsi said, not answering my question.

"I can't take this on the shuttle," I protested. "Or drink this outside on the street, or…" I stopped mid-sentence, noticing several people milling about with the same exact drink in their hand.

"Welcome to Vegas," Dr. Craig said with his devil may care smile.

It was probably not the wisest thing for me to have drunk that entire margarita in an hour, but for some unfathomable reason I was an absolute bundle of nerves. In all actuality, the drink was gone in less than an hour because I also showered and changed into a comfortable pair of jeans and a curve-hugging t-shirt. Pulling my curls into a big mess that somehow worked in the back, I surveyed myself in the mirror, scrutinizing everything I saw. I added some light makeup just to feel a little better, reminding myself the whole time there was no one there I was trying to impress.

The seminar didn't kick off until 10 am each day, and since it was only 9 in the evening I figured it would be just fine to go see the sights with Kelsi. I was finishing up the last of that far too delicious margarita when my cell rang, probably signaling to me that she was on her way.

"Ello, ello," I answered, finally relaxed enough to sit down at the desk.

"Is murder always a crime?" Troy asked, and damned if my heart didn't begin to race.

"Sometimes?" I said, giggling slightly. "Who's frazzled now?"

"I don't get frazzled, you do," he stated. "I get…frustrated."

"Potato, pot_ah_to," I countered, then giggled.

"Aren't you, like…on a work seminar or something?"

"You just talked to me a little bit ago so you already knew that, duh."

"Duh? Oh, this should be fun—Gabi's drinking," he said, and I swear I could hear his smile.

"What does that have to do with you being frazzled?"

"Frustrated," he corrected me.

"Whatever. 'Sup?"

He growled outloud and said, "People, damn people are what's up! I have somewhere I have to be, but am I there? Nooooo. And why not?"

"Um…people?"

"You're mocking me."

"Yes, I am," I agreed. "What people are you mad at and why is it their fault you're not where you're supposed to be?"

"When your entire life is planned by several different people, and none of them are talking to each other, things get…so…fucked up." Those last two words seemed to be said through clenched teeth, and for some reason it was oddly…hot.

"You really must be having a bad day."

"I've seen better," he replied. "I just…"

"What do you want?" I asked, and he sighed.

"Everything fixed," he said softly.

"Can it be fixed?" I asked, wondering in the back of my mind whether or not this line of questioning had a double connotation.

"I hope so." His voice was soft. I heard commotion in the background and he sighed again. "Fuck, fuck, FUCK."

"That doesn't sound good."

"No…it's not. Hey, sorry…I didn't mean to unload on you or anything,"

"Yes you did," I cut him off. "And if it helped you any, then I'm happy."

"I'll s…I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay," I replied, then we hung up simultaneously.

Only fifteen minutes had passed since I'd hung up the phone when Kelsi was at my door. "You up to seeing this?"

No matter how ready I said I was, actually living it, experiencing it was… indescribable. I know I looked like the wide-eyed tourist as she drug me down the streets, new rounds of margaritas in our hands. Every few feet I was handed a flyer for a strip club or the newest up and coming band playing in the various clubs dotted all along as far as my eyes could see. Pyramids, tall grandiose buildings, people dancing down the sidewalk, street performers everywhere…

"Isn't this like…Mardi Gras?" Kelsi asked.

"I never went to Mardi Gras," I reminded her, stepping around about the fourth person in the past five minutes to be walking around with a drink in their hand. "And what if we want to go over there?" I asked, pointing across the street.

"Nah, we're going up this way…just a little off the strip, John said there was a fantastic hole-in-the-wall bar that we can just relax in without all…" She waved her arms around, "this."

"I thought that this," I waved my free hand around imitating her, "was what we were shooting for."

"Oh, you'll get this tomorrow, I promise. And Saturday, and Sunday, before we send you home on Monday." My eyes were wide as I looked ahead at a replica of the Eiffel Tower, and I shook my head.

"Why did I forget my camera?" I murmured as I looked around me in awe.

"You'll have time…maybe," she commented, and I was unable to ask her the exact gist of her words due to all the commotion surrounding us. She led me by the hand down a side street, stopping directly in front of a small wooden door. She gave me a once-over, fluffing my hair and smiling.

"What the hell was that for?" I asked, but instead of answering she drug me into the small bar. Inside was a thin layer of smoke hanging, a jukebox playing an old Guns n Roses tune, and a few patrons who seemed to be locals. Oh, and Dr. Craig…er, John, sitting at the bar, alone, signaling to the bartender that he was buying our round. I noted curiously that he seemed to shrug when he looked at Kelsi.

"Good call to bring us here," Kelsi was saying, although her expression was unreadable. "I don't think we want our Vegas Virgin going into shock her first night."

"Too late," I spoke up. "You've really gone out of your way for this trip, Dr…um…John, and I appreciate it."

"Don't mention it," he said, his grin dazzling especially in my somewhat tipsy frame of mind. "You know, I was just trying to handle a crisis, a friend of mine called, and it was a good thing I was in here so I could semi-hear what was going on."

"Ahhh," Kelsi said, accepting her beer from the bartender who handed one to me also.

"Is your friend okay?" I asked.

"He's working it out," Dr. Craig replied. "So… let us salute our long weekend in Vegas, seminar and all. Not everything is about work, right?" We saluted the weekend and took sips just as Dr. Craig's cell phone began to ring.

"I thought it wasn't all about work," I joked and he flashed me a grin as he answered his phone. I turned to speak to Kelsi, with bits and pieces of Dr. Craig's side of the conversation trickling into my brain.

"So tomorrow night you're coming to the Hard Rock, where I'm staying. I guess you have to sign in tomorrow for your thing or I'd have you come back with me tonight," Kelsi was saying. I opened my mouth to agree when something about Dr. Craig's voice stopped me.

"Dude, you've got to be kidding me! This weekend? Why this weekend? And why… you know, we can do this, we can work around this. What do you mean I have to be there, too? Yeah, I know, it's just so last minute."

I shook my head to clear it, and said to Kelsi, "Apparently his friend isn't out of his crisis yet, or it has gotten worse. But Hard Rock, tomorrow, I'm in."

"We'll hit the Center Bar, do some gambling… they have different clubs and restaurants right in there, and since your lecture or whatever doesn't start until 10 each day you should be fine."

"I'm not a teenager anymore, Kelsi," I reminded her with a laugh, and Dr. Craig's voice drowned out her answer.

"Fuck, how could she… ok, so it wasn't her fault, it was his, but yeah you're right; it does throw a wrench in there, a big one. We will…dude, shut up for two seconds! We'll work it out."

"Dude? That's extensive vocabulary for a cardiologist," I remarked with a grin, which he returned.

"Yes…yes. And no." Dr. Craig was obviously talking to his friend as he was turning slightly away perhaps to hear him better.

"And I didn't hear what you were saying." I pointed at Kelsi, who was studying Dr. Craig's face. "Helllooooo, Earth to Kelsi! Oh, wait…" I pulled her close to whisper in her ear. "What's up with you and Dr. Craig?"

"Nothing," she replied with a sheepish grin, making me raise my eyebrow. I pulled her close again.

"Are you trying to set me up?"

"With him? No," she replied, sitting back in her chair.

"With who, then?"

"No one, and you are paranoid," Kelsi answered. "Now drink your beer." I promptly stuck my tongue out at her, but did what I was told.

"Okay, ladies, now where were we?" Dr. Craig asked, turning back towards us and putting his phone in his pocket.

"In a small bar in a really big city," I replied, and he laughed.

"You got me there. So, round one tonight is here. But we're on…for tomorrow." Kelsi smiled at his comment.

"At the Hard Rock?" she asked.

"I…believe so." There was so something going on, but being in my inebriated state I couldn't quite place it. Before I could ask them what the hell was going on, my phone was buzzing in my pocket. This time it was my turn to try to hear through the noise that was filtering in every time the door opened.

"Hello?"

"Behave yourself." Damn, damn, DAMN!

"What is 'have' and how am I supposed to 'be' it?" I asked Troy, who still seemed a bit riled up.

"Christine…"

"I love it when you call me that," I said breathlessly, without thinking.

"Really, now?" he asked. "I'll remember that one."

And he did.


	25. Chapter 25

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE**

Advil and Gatorade were my best friends the next morning. I'm still unsure how I'd managed to ward off the hangover, thinking surely I had drunk too much for the magic concoction to work…but it had, and I was infinitely grateful.

I was finally pulling my clothing out of my bag and suitcase as I had been in no shape to do so the night before. Wrapped in a pair of jeans on the bottom of my bag were my four-inch, elegantly simple, insanely flattering, black leather pumps. These were the shoes I wore when on the prowl, never anything I would pack for a seminar even if it was in Vegas.

"Kelsi," I said with a giggle, knowing that somewhere in one of my pieces of luggage was…yep, there it was.

The dress. THE dress. The curve hugging, man-eating, fuck me dress that had yet to actually result in me getting laid. Perhaps it attracted the wrong kind of attention, but back in the day it was exactly what I was looking for. I hadn't really worn it much since my teenage years and wondered briefly if it would still fit. A knock on the door signaled that I didn't have time to find out.

I still wasn't dressed, so I threw on my robe and ran to the door. Dr. Craig, all business-suited up for the occasion, stood there grinning down at me.

"How are we feeling this morning?" he asked as I stepped aside to let him in.

"I don't know about you," I said, rushing to get ready, "but I feel just peachy. Late, but peachy. Have a seat, or whatever…I'll be just a few minutes. Do I have a few minutes?"

"Yes," he replied, sitting at the desk while I grabbed my provisions and took them to the washroom.

I was notorious for getting ready quickly if I had to, when I was unconcerned with impressing anyone. I loosely pinned my curls up, applied minimal makeup, and slipped into a pair of khaki pants and a lightweight, short-sleeved black sweater. Simple, business casual, to be comfortable as I endured a few hours of lecture…after lecture…after lecture…after lecture…

Oh, God.

"I need coffee," I announced as I walked out of the washroom. Dr. Craig was eyeballing my heels that were still on my bed. "Should I be…frightened?"

"I was about to ask the same question, but I see you've decided against wearing these," he joked. "And coffee…I agree. We'll grab some on the way."

Dr. Craig was a rather engaging individual, very witty and articulate. He also had the routine down pat where he could make whomever he was with feel as if there was nothing and no one else more important than what they had to say. Oh yes, there was a reason he was so popular with the ladies; however, my heart was wrapped up in a pair of eyes that varied from bright blue to gray, depending on his mood. It also went without saying that Dr. Craig and I had a somewhat complex relationship of sorts. I had lost count of how many times he had apologized, as if personally responsible that my mother had not survived.

As we ordered our Starbucks, he attempted to apologize again.

"Dr. Craig,"

"It's John, Gabriella," he reminded me, his voice soft as he touched my arm, guiding me around to the end of the counter.

"Ok, John. I've told you repeatedly that I do not, in any way, shape or form, blame you for what happened with my mother. She suffered two major heart attacks in a short span of time; I saw the report of the damage that was done. Even if she had survived, she would never have lived a productive life afterwards. So, for the final time…" I raised my eyebrow as I looked at him.

"Okay, fair enough," he replied. "I have to say, though, that I'm pleasantly surprised that you agreed to come to this seminar."

"I've always been fascinated with cardiology," I admitted. "I understand that your lecture today is about the physiological differences in the heart of a man versus a woman."

"One would think that there wouldn't be too much of a difference…" He was interrupted when our drinks were placed on the counter, and he thanked the lady behind the counter.

"So it isn't just the symptoms that are different?" I asked.

"Not according to the research that I've been a part of," he replied. We were walking towards the conference room where the lectures were being held; lucky for the both of us, the Starbucks was located right around the corner. "I promise, though, if you nod off I'll give you my notes." He winked playfully at me and I smiled.

"Okay, deal."

"John!" I heard a somewhat familiar female voice calling out. We turned together, and walking briskly up towards us, looking absolutely stunning…strikingly beautiful…immaculate…

"Jessica Carter, what brings you to Vegas?"

I watched them hug, a horrible sinking feeling in my stomach as I remembered seeing this woman in Troy's arms not too long ago. I walked away quickly and quietly, into the room where the lecture was about to take place and sat in the back row, only a few people to my left.

My pulse was hammering, my throat dry in spite of the sips of my Caramel Macchiato. I tried in vain to listen as our first speaker was making her presentation, but my mind was going in a million different directions.

Dr. Craig knew Jessica. Did this mean he knew Troy, too? And what was she doing in Vegas? Oh, God…was this what Troy's plans were?

My hands were shaking and I accidentally spilled a tiny drop of coffee down the front of my sweater. I swore silently, thankful I'd worn a dark color but sure now that regardless it would show. Apparently, that was going to be my luck.

Here I was, across the country, and the one person who made me feel smaller than the norm was outside that door.

'It's okay, I'm just here on business,' I tried to tell myself. 'And besides…even if this was where Troy was planning on being, he was having problems getting away.' That green-eyed monster lurking beneath my surface held some sense of gratification knowing that even if he did make it, he was going through hell to try to be there. For her.

I wiped a stray tear and chided myself for automatically thinking the worst, making a mental note to ask Dr. Craig a few pointed questions at the next possible chance I got.

We broke for lunch about 1 pm, and to say I was starving was an understatement. They provided lunch for us in a dining area they had set up around the corner, and although I tried to find Dr. Craig, he had been conspicuously absent. I turned on my cell to contact Kelsi, just needing a friendly voice.

"Hello?" I had to stifle a giggle; she sounded as if she was just waking up.

"Feeling a bit…hung-over?" I asked.

"Nah, not exactly. Just resting for tonight."

"Yeah, I saw what you packed in my bag." She laughed softly.

"Are you mad?"

"Nah, not mad. I'm not wearing it, though." I sighed softly, picking at my food.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "You just don't sound…well, you sound like something's on your mind."

I hadn't told her about Jessica, or about Troy and Jessica. I know she'd read the journal, or parts of it, but I just didn't know what to say. 'Hey, Kelsi, Jess is here in Vegas, and Troy's been complaining that he had plans this weekend, so I'm being my usual dumbass self and automatically thinking the worst.' Nah, that didn't sound so great after all. So, I stayed silent, fumbling over what excuse I could possibly come up with for being so melancholy.

"Gabi?"

"I'm fine," I lied. "I'm just tired, that's all. So, the seminar is over at four today."

"We'll grab some eats, get ready, and hit the Center Bar and such here," she said, as chipper as she could sound after just waking up. "You will get over whatever it is that's ailing you when I'm done."

For the rest of the lecture…this one was Dr. Craig, I actually did pay attention as this was one of the topics I had most wanted to hear about. It was a conscious effort to not let my mind wander to all of the questions I had for him. At the end of our day, I waited by the door until Dr. Craig was walking out of the conference room. He was shaking hands with a gentleman standing just inside the door when I felt my phone buzz in my hand.

Troy.

I honestly couldn't believe that I hesitated before answering, but since my mind is my own worst enemy I tried to come up with a reason to let it go to voicemail. It was my heart rather than my curiosity that made me decide against that.

"How was the seminar?" he asked.

"Parts of it were very interesting," I admitted, without adding that the most interesting was how Dr. Craig knew Jessica and that I had seen her.

"Tired?" he asked, but his tone showed he was still aggravated.

"Yes," I replied, somewhat short but I didn't want Dr. Craig to walk by me without getting to talk to him. "Still stuck?"

"Damnit, yes," he said. I'm sorry to admit I actually smiled at that. Ha! So much for your plans with Jess. "What's the game plan tonight?" he asked.

"Just me and Kelsi at the Hard Rock…maybe Dr. Craig."

Oh yes, two can play this game.

"Huh," was all he said.

Huh. That was it.

Fucker.

So, in the midst of my failed attempt at making Troy jealous, I completely missed Dr. Craig walking the opposite direction and ended up taking the shuttle back to my hotel, questions unasked.

I looked at the dress that now hung on the supplied clothing rack. For a brief moment I considered donning that dress, walking into that hotel, raising absolute hell and leaving with anyone I chose, Troy and everyone else be damned.

The memory of the last time I'd worn it stopped me.

The restaurant. The anxiety meds I'd stolen from my sister. The girl with the flowing dark hair, and Him. The boy…that boy with the beautiful eyes.

Troy.

I sat on the edge of my bed and cried.


	26. Chapter 26

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX**

"Um, Gabriella," Kelsi was saying as we were sitting in The Pink Taco eating a light dinner, "I realize you didn't want to wear the black dress, but… we're in Vegas."

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" I asked, a tad bit defensive.

"It's screaming that something's bothering you." I looked down at my comfortable jeans, sneakers, and casual T-shirt. My hair was pinned up, I had merely touched up my make up, and had traveled the short, but a rather long time to get there, distance to the Hard Rock where Kelsi was staying. Sitting next to Kelsi, who was dressed in black pants that hugged her and a white sleeveless button-down top, along with her black boots…yeah, I looked like I was ready to curl up for a nap.

"I…didn't want to wear that dress," I said quietly.

"Well…lady…hate to break it to ya," she continued, "but we're going shopping."

"I don't feel the need for retail therapy right now," I disagreed.

No such luck for me.

Less than an hour later I was dressed all in black, Kelsi joking that I must be in mourning still, but the soft, flowing material of the shirt made me feel very…girly, feminine, like I wasn't lacking in that department. Just to prove her point, Kelsi proceeded to pull the material back just a little, tying the strings in the back that I didn't know were there. Voila, there were the curves I hated so, so badly. The pants hugged my hips and were boot cut, my absolute favorite style, so that they weren't too tight, or too loose, down at the bottom. I have to admit, though, I adored the shoes- feminine, elegant, high-heeled lace up boots.

After changing up in Kelsi's suite, she pulled out her makeup bag and said, "Either you do it, or I'm going to."

"That's a scary thought," I muttered, snatching the bag from her. I didn't darken it too much and kept it fairly natural, but accented the eyes. I hesitated for a moment, but decided against doing the full smoky-eye effect that I used to combine with glossy lips…ah, the attention that used to garner. I wasn't after attention, though; tonight, I needed to forget.

"Ok, I'm ready," I announced. "And I have my separate gambling money so I won't kill my budget, thank you for the tip."

"Don't mention it. Now…to de-virginize you."

"At least you didn't say you were gonna pop my cherry," I quipped as we walked out the door. "That just would have been disturbing."

"Thank you for the visual," Dr. Craig's voice made me jump. He was making his way down the hall, presumably towards Kelsi's door.

"Well, lookie there…How goes it with you, Dr. Cr…John?" Kelsi asked, a twinkle in her eye.

"Better than you could possibly imagine," he conveyed his private message. What, was Kelsi in on this whole hide-Troy-and-Jess-from me? Nah, couldn't be, because her face lit up like a flipping Christmas tree.

I needed a drink.

"So…we were headed down to the Center Bar," Kelsi was saying.

"Yes, bar!" I intervened. "Bar is good, I need a drink." I held my temple for just a moment as I walked vigorously towards the elevators. I needed to drink just a little bit of courage before I cornered Dr. Craig with my suspicions.

"What the hell have we done to her?" he was joking with Kelsi behind me.

"Turned me into a lush," I called back over my shoulder. "Guess you two shouldn't have been feeding me alcohol yesterday."

They were joking and laughing on the elevator ride down, but I made it a point to just listen. If they were going to give any hints as to what was going on, tonight was the night I would catch them and call them on it. Well…call them on it once I was just a little more numb. I was holding my cell at the time, so I set it on vibrate and slid the thin device in my front pocket. I had my sincere doubts that Mr. Bolton was going to even consider phoning me this evening.

My nerves were slightly frayed as we walked into the casino. I can't remember the last time I'd seen so many people packed into one place, and the lights and sounds would have been overwhelming if I wasn't beginning to become immune to it. I was about to pull a complete Gabriella and ask Kelsi where the Center Bar was…um, hello, it's in the center. Yeah, I was frazzled. No, I wasn't frazzled, I was…who am I kidding?

I was frazzled.

"Beer or liquor? Beer or liquor?" I asked, tapping my foot slightly.

"I'd opt for something light," Dr. Craig suggested, his dark brown eyes twinkling with mischief. "And not to worry, you can take it out to gamble, too."

"Right, with my luck all my gambling money's gonna be gone in five minutes," I muttered, choosing beer. Yes it meant that my courage would be built up slower, but hell…I had all night, right?

"Okay, do you want to hit the slots first, or try your luck at…um…something else?" Kelsi asked me.

"You're the seasoned pro at this, even for a Poor Disabled Indian Girl." Dr. Craig's laugh at that comment made me smile.

"Yeah, I heard about that one."

I eyeballed him curiously. "I never told you," I cut him off.

"Yeah, about that…"

He seemed on the verge of telling me something, but Kelsi grabbed my hand and said, "Slots!" loud enough for me to hear her as she drug me over towards the machines. "We'll go back to the bar in…an hour?"

"An hour's good," Dr. Craig agreed. "Hey...listen, I'll catch up with you then. I have something to do real quick."

Before I could protest and tell him I wanted him to finish what he was saying, Kelsi had me perched in front of a nickel machine…I think?…I wasn't quite paying attention to what I was doing as I was busy downing my beer.

"Hey Kelsi," I finally said above the noise, "are you going to tell me what the hell is going on?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," was all she would say.

"I'm sure," I muttered. "Hey, I'm off to the washroom, I'll be back. And no, I don't need an escort."

"You sure?" she asked, and I nodded.

In all honesty, I was a girl on a mission. I had that nagging voice in the back of my head that told me it was time to go exploring, and try to find where the hell Dr. Craig had disappeared to. I seriously doubted I would say anything to him if and when I found him, but for once I was going to follow my gut instinct that was telling me to make my way out of the casino area.

The hallways, lobby…every place was bustling with the excitement that is Vegas. Several people were headed to the nightclub Body English, and I secretly hoped that Dr. Craig was not on his way up there; that was one place that I had vowed I wouldn't enter.

I was walking towards a small group of people that were huddled by another hallway, and noticing Dr. Craig standing there, his back to me, I made my not-so-stealthy way around the corner; as long as he didn't see me, I wasn't worried as none of the others knew me, or at least would recognize me. Not even that beautiful, glowing girl who happened to be the center of this bit of attention.

"So, when's Troy coming in?" Dr. Craig was asking.

"Not until tomorrow, can you believe it?" Jessica's voice carried quite well, almost as if she wanted the world to hear. "Leave it to him to get all of this started and have me come in to make sure the arrangements are all in place."

"I didn't think the bride made her own arrangements," someone else quipped, and my heart jumped into my throat.

'Settle down, Gabriella,' I told myself. 'You knew she was getting married, perhaps Troy was just doing something nice for her.'

"Not normally, I don't suppose," Jessica replied with a laugh. "But for him I'll make an exception."

God, did she have to be so fucking perfect?

I absentmindedly touched my hand to my hair, thinking I needed a touch up, so I used that as my excuse to go find the washroom I'd originally lied about. Once I was safely inside, I braced myself on the sink for a moment, my heart racing. Troy was coming here, he would be here tomorrow.

For her.

I was wondering a bit aimlessly around the casino, not quite looking for Kelsi or Dr. Craig, and ignoring the buzzing of my phone in my pocket. Above everything else, I needed to speak to Troy. I knew this, with all my heart. I knew his number; I had every intention of calling. But first…yes, first, I needed more courage, so I made my way back to that center bar.

I was waiting for my drink- a much stronger drink this time, opting for a Long Island Iced Tea, taking a shortcut. My hands were shaking ever so slightly as I accepted the drink, leaving a hefty tip for the bartender to ensure that if needed I would be refilled quickly. I jumped as I felt a hand placed on the small of my back, turning quickly to give a peace of my mind to the touchy-feely stranger.

"Do you mind?" The last word trailed off as I stared up into those beautiful eyes- the brightest of blues this evening- and that smirk on his beautiful freshly shaven face… Oh…my…

"Of course I do, Christine." His voice was low as he leaned close to me so I could hear him. Damnit, damnit, damnit! I felt him give me a brief kiss on the cheek, not daring to do more in such a public place. I'm not sure if the look on my face was one of shock or anger as he smiled down at me, visibly restraining from tucking a stray curl behind my ear. I saw him put his hand down quickly, and he turned to the bar to order a beer.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, sure my tone couldn't be registered above all the noise. He merely smiled in return, leaving money for the bartender as he retrieved his beer. He turned to walk away from the bar and motioned for me to follow him. The mean, hateful part of me wanted to stay put, let him wander off on his own, go find his perfect, precious Jess the way he planned to. The other part of me was drinking the Long Island as we walked together, far enough apart as to not attract attention, a million things running through my mind that I was going to give him a piece of just as soon as we could.

As we reached the front of the casino, I was already finished with my drink and I handed my empty glass to a passing waitress. I saw Troy flash me a quick grin as he walked out of there, still carrying his bottle of beer, no one daring to stop Mr. Rock Star from doing precisely what he wanted to do. He looked back at me and motioned with a tilt of his head for me to catch up with him, and while part of me found it endearing the other part of me wanted to slap the shit out of him.

There were a handful of people on the private elevators that I followed him onto. I stood on the opposite wall, stealing a quick glance at him…he was absolutely breathtaking. His hair was just a little longer than he had been wearing it, his skin smooth as porcelain, defining his lips all that much more. Oh…and there he stood, all in black, his leather jacket open. The way he leaned against the opposite wall, glancing sideways at me as three of the five people departed before it continued up to the next level made me wish we were in that elevator alone. One floor up the other two patrons made their exit, leaving us alone for the first time since I had dropped him off at his hotel.

"You could at least act happy to see me," he said, his voice soft. He took a drink of beer as I turned to answer him.

"Would you have preferred that I pounce on you in front of everyone?" I asked coyly, and one side of his mouth was turned up in a smirk.

"Is that a rhetorical question, or do you really want an answer?"

The elevator doors opened before I could reply, and I followed him down the hall to one of the larger suites. I kept quiet in the hall, not knowing if anyone was around, all of the questions and accusations flowing through my head, ready for me to scream them as soon as I had the chance to.

Damnit, did he have to look so damn sexy using a keycard to get in a stupid room? GAH! What was it about his hands, his wrists, his arms as he shrugged out of his leather jacket the moment we stepped into his room…oh, holy hell, what was it that I was going to say to him?

I jumped slightly as the door clicked shut, every thought racing from my mind as he smiled. "Come on in…I'll only bite if you ask really, really nicely."

Okay, drinking…not such a good idea now.

I took a couple steps forward, tentatively. He sighed, looking down and tousling the back of his hair. "Are you really that uncomfortable around me now?" His voice was soft, his eyes searching as he looked back at me. I felt my eyes fill with tears as I shook my head 'no'. "Do you hate me?" he asked, taking slow steps towards me, and again I shook my head. "Are you sorry?" My eyes slid shut for a brief moment, one tear escaping, and I jumped when I felt his fingertips brush it away.

"I…already told you that I'm not," I was finally able to say, my breathing becoming more difficult in his presence. "What are you doing, Troy? What are you thinking?"

"I was thinking how nice it would be to just… kiss you," he replied. "To just…kiss you…do you think it's a bad idea?"

"Is it?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. Every word, every question, every accusation fled from my mind as his strong hands caressed my face, tilting it up slightly as his lips brushed against mine. For one fleeting moment I resisted, my hands resting on his, and then… I couldn't help myself—my fingertips followed up his arms, my body reacting as goose bumps rose on him, my hands wrapping themselves around his shoulders. I pulled him closer to me, the kiss deepening when I sighed against him. He tasted of Budweiser and mint gum, and somehow the combination was all the more intoxicating.

I felt his hands in my hair, pulling the pins out as the kisses grew more and more urgent. Once he was sure my hair was free he stepped back, his breathing labored, his eyes glazed over as he ran his fingers through my hair, the curls now framing my face and hanging loosely in what had to have been an absolute mess.

But not to him.

"This is you, Gabriella Christine. This…is you."

Did I say I had questions for him? Because they certainly weren't there as I wrapped my hands in his shirtfront and pulled him close to me again, kissing him as if I could erase tomorrow, make him stay with me. I moaned in protest when I felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and he laughed softly.

"Mmmm… I just meant to kiss you, Gabi, that's all," he said, his trail of kisses leading down my neck now, his phone still signaling that someone was trying to get a hold of him. I tangled my hands in his hair, holding him as close as I could as he continued his assault on my senses.

Damnit, damnit, damnit. What was it I was going to say to him?

A loud pounding on the door caused us both to jump and Troy stood, his arms still around me. For just a brief moment I thought there was a look of panic in his eyes until we heard Dr. Craig's voice.

"Troy, this is your conscience talking, open the door."

Troy smiled sheepishly at me and stepped back, reaching for the door handle. When he opened it, there stood Dr. Craig and Kelsi, who immediately pulled me into a bear hug.

"Are you insane?" she asked quickly. "You wander off, don't come back to the table, don't answer your phone…"

"I think I can take care of myself," I said with a smile.

"This isn't New Mexico; you've got to be more careful," she scolded. Before I could open my mouth to protest, Troy spoke up.

"She's right, Gabi, you really shouldn't do that; you need to have some sort of buddy system here."

Thanks for sticking up for me, pal.

"What am I supposed to call you, then?" I asked, shooting him a look of defiance.

"You were gone more than an hour!" Kelsi squeaked, running a hand through her hair. "Do you know how panicked I was?"

"We can all see she's just fine," Dr. Craig stopped their inquisition of me, and I smiled in thanks. "And you," he pointed at Troy.

"I'm behaving myself," Troy said, putting his hands up, his eyebrows raised. "How you holding up there, John?" You're…kidding…

"Oh for fucks sake," I muttered, covering my face with my hands.

"What?" Troy and Dr. Craig asked simultaneously.

"John?" I asked. "You're…John? As in John, John… not Not John." Troy laughed then, patting me gently on the shoulder.

"Yep, that's him," Troy was saying as I continued hiding my face thinking to myself, 'How could I miss something THAT obvious?'

"Gabi, even I knew that," Kelsi said, and I glared at her.

"Oh, shut up," I muttered, and we all shared a nice little laugh at my expense.

I wish I could say it was the only time the rest of the weekend that I had missed something that had been so painfully obvious.


	27. Chapter 27

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN**

Precious.

That was the only word going through my mind as I sat curled up on the floor next to the couch in Troy's suite going through the pictures he was showing me of his nieces and nephews. Absolutely, without a doubt…precious.

Troy was kicked back on the couch, his feet resting on the coffee table in front of him, his legs close enough to me where if I wanted I could rest my head on them. He was absentmindedly playing with my curls, twirling them around his fingers softly and letting them fall, as he was catching up with Dr. Craig…er, John. Ugh, it was going to be difficult to let go of the formalities.

"They are adorable," I said with a smile. "Kelsi, did you take some of these?"

"Yeah, but only the last…" her voice trailed off as she reached over from her seat on the floor close to me, "three. Just these." Two of them had Troy in them being tackled by all of the children and I couldn't help but laugh.

"What's so funny? I could have been hurt," Troy interrupted his conversation just to say to me.

"Wimp," I teased with a wink.

"Whatever," he muttered, mock-rolling his eyes and turning his attention back to John.

"When did you take these?" I asked Kelsi.

"When I went out there last time," she replied, then blushed slightly, probably remembering she hadn't said she'd seen Troy.

"Is that when this scheme was concocted?" I asked, my eyebrow raised.

"Gabriella!" She put her hand over her heart. "I'm hurt! You think we'd… of course we did." She smiled at me then.

"You're evil, you know?" I asked, looking up at Troy and Dr. Cr…John. See?

"How so?" Troy asked, still playing with my curls.

"Because! You couldn't tell me? Any of you?"

"And ruin the surprise? Wouldn't dream of it," John said. It was still odd seeing him out of the workplace, a beer in his hand. I shook my head that I have to admit was a little fuzzy.

"So…this is all your fault, right?" I asked John, and he bowed his head slightly.

"He swears it wasn't on purpose," Troy said, eyeballing John suspiciously. "What do you think?"

"An honest mistake," John replied. "If I had known her number, do you think I'd just pass it off to you?"

"Ha ha, very funny," I said, giving in and leaning against Troy's legs.

"Who's kidding?" John asked, looking at me, and I rolled my eyes.

"It's getting deep in here," I muttered as I turned my head slightly to look over at Kelsi. "Hey, is Ryan coming out?"

"He wasn't going to, but…"

"He changed his mind," Troy spoke up quickly. I couldn't see his face, but I saw the look Kelsi was giving him. Like a kick in the stomach, I remembered Jess and my mood soured slightly.

"Um…he'll be out tomorrow," Kelsi continued, flashing me her 'I'm gonna get me some' smile and making me laugh. "But…I think that…he'll be busy for just a little bit? So um… that club, Body English, we were gonna go."

"We as in we who?" I asked. "'Cause I'm not going in there."

"Yes you are," she argued, shoving me slightly.

"Why should I?" I countered.

"Because you'll have fun?" Troy sounded as if he was asking a question, being his usual cheeky self.

"Eh, likely story, you're just trying to keep me occupied." I was only half-joking, the serious side of me knowing he had plans with Jessica, even though I didn't know what.

"How long has it been since we went dancing?" Kelsi asked, honestly looking excited.

"Years? I…think?" I answered.

"Settled, then," she said, sitting back as she was placing the photos back in their envelope.

"I'm sorry we're going to miss it," John commented, grinning slyly as he looked at Troy.

"Only part of it," Troy countered. I looked up at him then, trying to read his expression, and when he glanced down I felt my heart flutter just a tiny bit.

"I can't imagine you in a dance club," Kelsi said to him, mirroring my own thoughts.

"Why…nah, I know why not, but hey!" Troy replied. "I can mingle…I'm a people person."

"Which is why we actually reserved a table for your ass to sit at and watch," John quipped with a laugh.

"Watching is not always bad," Troy stated, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Yes, but…" John stood up then. "Watching will have to commence tomorrow. The hour is late, Bolton."

"Yes, that it is," Troy said with a sigh. I was again a bundle of nerves as I sat straight up so he could stand. Damnit, what did I do? Did I stay? Did I go?

Did I beg for the truth?

I looked at Kelsi for guidance, wondering exactly how much she knew, but she merely grinned at me. "It was hard to keep the secret from you," she admitted. "I hope you're not mad."

"So…this was the secret? That he was coming here?" I didn't want to add that I'd been spying on Dr. Craig when he was talking to Jessica, or that I knew she was here. I wanted the truth without provocation.

"Surprise," she said.

Perhaps she didn't know.

"Hey," Troy was saying to me, offering me his hand to help me up. I accepted, wondering what the rest of the night was going to bring. As Kelsi was saying goodbye to Dr….. to John, I was standing there looking slightly up as I stood in front of Troy. He looked so damn good, even if he did look tired. I felt him take my hands in his so softly, caressing them as he smiled wistfully at me. He released one of my hands and gently ran his fingers through my curls once more. "Please don't be angry with me."

"You want me to go," I said.

"No…well, yes…but no. God, Gabi, I just…" he sighed, raking his hand through his tousled hair. "I want to…talk with you, and I don't want it to be when either of us has been drinking."

"So you kissed me because you've been drinking?" I asked, defensive, pulling back.

"No…no, see? Don't think that, the worst of me, please." He took in a deep breath before continuing. "I kissed you because I wanted to. And if you stayed, I'd… want more than that, and I just can't."

My eyes narrowed slightly as I let the words sink in.

Oh, I'd been spoken to before that way, almost those exact words.

"So…I know you have more lectures tomorrow," he said, again taking my hands in his. "You're staying with Kelsi tonight, right?" I nodded, unable to speak. "So you'll be coming back here, and I'll see you before I…" His voice trailed off and he looked down at his feet, then back up at me. "We'll talk tomorrow?" His voice was so soft, his eyes silently pleading with me.

"Of course," I finally managed, forcing a smile of my own. His eyes seemed to cloud over, as if he was struggling with what he wanted to say to me, and for a brief moment he closed them.

"I'm sorry," he whispered before kissing me softly, our bodies responding almost immediately as if starved for each other.

"Hey, hey, HEY! Romeo!" John's voice reverberated through the suite. "Come on, Juliet's gotta go." Troy stepped back first, watching me intently as I backed away from him. I could feel the tears forming, and I didn't want to give him that satisfaction so I turned and walked with Kelsi out into the hall.

Even with lectures not starting until 10 am, I was running slightly late. I had taken my shower, put just enough makeup on to hide any dark circles, and was rushing down in tan pants and a white top, hoping I wasn't nearly the klutz I was the day before when I stopped to get my coffee. I was in line when I felt a hand softly touch my shoulder. I turned around and had to think quickly to hide my expression.

Jessica Carter.

"Hi," she said, extending her hand that I shook slightly. "I'm Jess; I'm a friend of John's. I remember seeing you speaking with him yesterday."

"Hello," I said shyly. I wasn't about to tell her my name, if she was only claiming to remember me from yesterday.

"Will you be coming with him this evening?" she asked. Did she have to look so happy…so nice…so…perfect?

"This evening?" I repeated, trying to retrieve information if I could.

"The engagement party," she beamed. "I know you two were here on business, but this came up, Troy just insisted it was this weekend, and here in Las Vegas." She laughed softly, pushing her hair back, the light catching that beautiful ring on her hand. "John said he'd talk to you about it; I think he's rather smitten with you."

"Is that so," I said, unable to stop my eyebrow from raising, and she laughed.

"And I'm sure Troy won't mind," she continued.

"Troy," I repeated, hoping my face didn't register the shock that she would bring him up in that context. Did she really know who I was?

"Troy," she replied, "my fiancé."

"Oh," I was able to somehow say as I turned towards the counter since it was my turn.

"I didn't catch your name," she said, again placing her hand on my shoulder.

"Ma'am, I need your order," the young man at the counter interrupted us, saving me from further interrogation. As I placed my order, another of Jessica's friends came up to her, and I was forced to listen to her talk so happily of her upcoming party and wedding.

"It's about damn time you and Troy married," the mystery girl was saying, and I was unable to stop the tears as I took my coffee and hurried around the corner, furiously dialing my cell.

"Hello?" I finally heard Kelsi's tired voice on the other end.

"I need a favor," I was saying through my tears.

It was wrong, it was so very wrong.

"What's that?"

"I left my keycard to my hotel on the desk there, by the computer jack," I began.

"Why do you need your keycard? You're staying with me tonight, right? Gabriella…God, what happened, are you crying?"

"Just…do this for me, please," I choked, stopping to rest along a wall. I paused briefly, then caught another glimpse of that beautiful perfect girl gushing about her upcoming wedding. I took in a shaky breath, tears ceasing, numbness setting in. "There are a couple things I need you to get for me."


	28. Chapter 28

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT**

Sometimes it isn't even necessary for me to be dolled up to know exactly how to get to a man. I'd learned everything about that years ago, and when the situation was warranted, no one could work a man quite like me. So, when I spotted Dr. Craig…or John, I had to remind myself that's what he wanted to be called…at lunch that day, I knew the time had come.

I picked up my tray of food that once again was provided and made my way towards the table where he sat. He was in deep conversation with another doctor, but when he looked up at me I raised an eyebrow and smiled…just the right smile, inviting, perhaps a little coy…and motioned him to follow me to a less crowded table.

I had taken the time during one of the breaks to do a touch-up on my face thanks to one of the other nurses, and had pulled a few stray tendrils of curls down so that they hung loosely around my face. Also, knowing where this man's eyes tended to wander, I strategically unbuttoned my blouse to just the right place knowing that even if I couldn't get him to keep eye contact his eyes would still be on me at all times.

When it comes to being bad… I am truly one of the best.

John wasn't about to fall for any girly-type games; he was a very smart man. I had to play this just right.

"So, you're coming to the club tonight, right?" I asked, tilting my head just a little and smiling as if I didn't have a care in the world.

"Yeah, I have a few things to attend to first though," he replied. There was no need for me to inquire what those few things were, and if they involved being someone's conscience then more power to me.

"I don't think it opens until after 10 tonight anyways," I said, keeping conversation light. "So, you dance?"

"Occasionally," he answered. "And you?"

"When the mood strikes me. Or I'm forced to, whichever comes first." Again with the smiling, which he seemed to enjoy. "Kelsi will probably be first out on the floor."

"And you'll follow?"

"Depends." I leaned forward just a little. "I will if you will."

"Is that so?" His sly grin gave his thoughts away. Dr. Craig, you may be a womanizer, but you are not the only player in the game. I didn't have to bat my eyelashes, or make lewd comments. All I had to do was set the bait.

"Will you dance with me?"

"Ms. Montez, why would you ask me?"

"Well…Dr. Craig, I thought you might be interested." I smiled again, sweetly. "I prefer to not dance alone."

"I wasn't aware that you were alone."

"I'm far above the high school games," I lied. I had learned every trick in the book while I was there, and they were all coming into play. He sat back in his chair and took a drink of his coffee, eyeing me up and down.

"Okay," he finally said. "You're on."

After the last lecture, I made my way towards the doors to get the taxi that I had called for, since I wasn't taking the shuttle back to the hotel with the others. I remained aloof about my plans with the other nurses, simply stating that I had friends here in town that were taking me out. Even though Dr. Craig and I worked in the same hospital, even with his reputation as a womanizer he also knew how to keep his mouth shut. No one would be the wiser.

"Ms. Montez." Speak of the devil. I turned and smiled at him. "Are you not taking the shuttle?"

"No, sir, I have other places to go." I pulled out a keycard to Kelsi's room.

"A quick bite to eat beforehand?" he suggested, and I had to smile. I'm good.

"Sure," I agreed, and we walked side-by-side to the awaiting taxi.

Dinner was pleasant, even a bit subdued as I knew from experience that John was trying to see exactly what my intentions were. I knew that he and Troy were friends and that they'd known each other for many years. That being said, I also remembered the comment he had made to Troy regarding the wrong number issue.

"So," I finally said to him during our after-dinner drinks when I had ignored approximately the third call from Troy 'I have to tell you I'm marrying my first love' Bolton, "I have a question for you. I really need you to answer this honestly." I reached over and touched his hand for effect. "Did you mean it when you said you wouldn't have given him the number, even inadvertently, if you knew if was mine?"

He paused before answering, looking down at my hand before resuming eye contact. Believe me, I can work the earnest eyes when I have to. He studied me for just a fraction of a second more before answering.

"Yes."

Hook. Line. Sinker.

I was in.

'What are you doing, Gabriella?' That was the question that kept swarming through my head as I was showering before preparing for the evening. I ignored it, remembering with that sickening feeling in my stomach how it felt to see Jessica in Troy's arms at that hotel; remembering the look of longing on his face as he sat in my living room… MY living room, knowing he was wishing he was with her; remembering that damn journal, how every girl he was with was a replacement for her, and how I had been so insignificant that I wasn't even mentioned.

"Gabi!" Kelsi's voice registered as she was sauntering in. "Are you about done in there?"

"I'm out of the shower, if that's what you mean," I replied, stepping out of the washroom with only a towel wrapped around me. I jumped slightly when I saw who was with her.

"Where have you been?" Troy's voice was low, even toned as he looked at me.

"I went to dinner," I replied. "Sorry, I couldn't find my phone." How easy it was to use that excuse when I was known for losing everything.

"Hey, I have to go get ready," Kelsi said quickly, giving me a kiss on the cheek before grabbing her things and heading to the washroom. Troy and I stood there alone, his eyes drinking the sight of me in.

"Why are you here?" I asked coolly, walking past him to grab a Diet Pepsi out of the small fridge.

"I wanted to talk with you," he said, standing still, watching me.

"Ahhh, 'The Talk.' I see. I think I've heard it before, but lay it on me." I sat on the couch, still in only a towel, as aloof as I could muster up the courage to be. He wasn't supposed to see me yet; I wasn't ready for him to see me yet.

"What the hell," he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose as if trying to ward off a headache. He glanced over my way and threw his hands up in the air. "Okay, I give. What did I do now?"

"I'm not following you, Troy," I said sweetly. A flash in his eyes, perhaps a flicker of memory at my words, was the only emotion I got from him before his phone starting ringing. "And you're saved by the bell."

He glanced at his caller I.D. and hit the button on his phone to stop the ringing. "I'm not going to stand here and try to pry out of you exactly what it is that I've fucked up. I have a few things to say to you, Gabi, and they're things you need to hear."

"Really? This should be good then." If I had been in any different state of mind then perhaps I would have cared whether or not I hurt him. Unfortunately for him, I'd reached the breaking point of him hurting me.

"Gabriella, I…" We were interrupted again by his phone. He took a deep breath, glancing down at the caller I.D. again, the look of frustration giving me just a tiny feel of happiness, justice if you will.

"Well, looks like you're out of time," I said smoothly, standing up and walking past him. "You don't want to keep whomever that is waiting."

"What the hell happened?" I was happy my back was to him when he asked that question, just the sound of hurt in his voice wavered my demeanor. "Gabriella?" I still refused to turn around, taking a drink of Diet Pepsi and flipping through a tourist guide on the counter. "Christine, please, look at me."

I turned around then, my defiant stare daring him to say my name that way again, with him knowing what it did to me. I saw the muscle along his jaw line twitch slightly, and he looked away, defeated. He walked swiftly to the door, swung it open, and then turned to face me again.

"I'll see you later," he said softly. "Promise me…Gabriella promise me you won't do anything you're going to regret."

"Of course," I replied icily. As he left, I turned up the volume on the CD player, Curve's "Chinese Burn" blaring throughout the suite:  
_  
"She'll break a promise as a matter of course  
Because she thinks it's fun to have no remorse  
She gets what she wants and then walks away  
And she doesn't give a fuck what you might say_

Because it cuts her up like Irish mortar  
Mother's pride is what we taught her  
Soiled and petty as we happily taunt her  
Friend or enemy we're all to blame"


	29. Chapter 29

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE**

"Exactly how long is it going to take you to get ready?" Kelsi had been asking that question for about 15 minutes or so. I knew exactly the look I was going for, though, and felt no need to rush it.

"You can go ahead, if you'd like," I said, the door to the washroom still closed as I put on the finishing touches. The smoky eyeshadow had to be just so, not so dark that I looked like I was stepping out of a goth magazine. The cheeks had blush applied lightly in just the right places, accenting my cheekbones. The lips…those were my pride and joy of this look; a soft wine color, with a clear sheen of gloss on them. Any man looking at my lips would have one thing only on his mind.

And the one man's reaction I wished for already knew what I could do with them. Such a shame he was busy.

I had applied gel to my curls so that they would keep their shape. It was too long to simply hang to my shoulders the way it had all those years before, so I pinned it up and let several tendrils fall around my face. The effect was a more mature, more sensual version of my wild teenage self, the curve of my neck exposed adding to the whole package.

The dress…what could be said about the dress? Black, hugging, sparkling when the light hit it just right. It fit like a short, tight glove showing every curve that Troy had spent hours exploring. That first night in his hotel room, when we had overturned furniture, pulled the cushions off the couch, the covers off the bed…

I shook my head to clear it, my curls falling right back into place. Tonight was not the night for that.

Slipping on my heels I was suddenly much taller. Thinking that I could probably look him in the eye when I made it very clear what my intentions were caused my heart to begin beating faster, but I did my best to quickly put it out of my mind.

Numb. I needed to be numb.

In the absence of any anti-anxiety meds, I opted for a beer. I was expecting Kelsi to be gone when I emerged like a butterfly from a cocoon, attitude galore as I waltzed past her to the mini fridge for a cold Budweiser.

"Who the hell are you and what have you done with Gabriella?" she asked, her eyes wide.

"Ah, you missed this part of me," I commented. "You were still in Maryland in high school, weren't you?"

"Yeah…are you feeling okay?" I cocked my eyebrow and looked at her.

"Does it look like I am?"

"That's not what I'm asking." She took a couple steps towards me, her eyes narrowed slightly. "What the hell is going on?"

"You know," I began as I picked up my clutch purse and headed towards the door, beer still in hand, "I'm not quite sure. I'm about to find out, though."

As we walked towards the elevators, I heard my phone begin to ring in my purse. I signaled to Kelsi to hold on a moment and stopped, handing my beer to her as I answered.

"Hello?" Wow. Even my voice sounded different.

"Ms. Montez." It was John. Lucky for him I was on a mission or I would have quickly told him how much it irritated the holy living hell out of me to be called that.

"Hello, Sir, I am guessing your evening has been a smashing success so far." Kelsi smiled, incorrectly assuming I was speaking with Troy. Score another one for me; I am just as good at keeping secrets.

"Rather boring, to be honest with you."

"Then you need some action to liven it up," I said, trading Kelsi my purse for my beer and downing half of it.

"Right now, I'm almost beginning to believe you."

"So is that an invitation?" I asked, smiling and winking at Kelsi. John was quiet for a brief moment and I heard Troy in the background making some off-handed joke about him being on the phone in the middle of a party. Apparently, this was the wrong thing to do.

"Yes, it is," was John's reply.

"Perfect. Tell me where to meet you." I winked again as I finished my beer while John was telling me where he would be coming to meet me.

"Holy shit, he doesn't even know what's going to hit him!" she exclaimed with a girlish giggle, and I smiled slyly in return.

"No, he has no idea," I said, walking arm-in-arm with her the rest of the way to the elevators.

I talked Kelsi into going to the club first, and that I'd only be an hour at the most. She joked that I was probably gone for the night, but I assured her I had every intention of going to that club this evening. I had no doubts that an hour was more time than I actually needed.

I stood by the private elevators, waiting for John to come for me just as he said he would. When he stepped off, I was slightly amused at his expression as he scanned the crowd, looking for me even though I was a mere ten feet away from him. The look on his face was priceless as I approached him, taking pride in the slight flush of color in his exquisitely tanned cheeks. He was dressed in a black suit with a blue shirt, no tie and top button undone. Apparently this party had been going on for quite some time.

Playing the game to the hilt, I took his hand in mine and gently kissed his cheek, smiling as I wiped the smudge of gloss from his clean-shaven face. He looked just slightly down at me and flashed his million dollar smile.

"Ms. Montez…"

"Tonight it's Gabriella," I purred into his ear. "Just…Gabriella."

We stepped onto the elevator, surprisingly ending up alone for the first few floors. He turned to me, placing one hand on my hip, being his suave self and trying to assert his place as the alpha male in my life. "I'll never understand why he strung you along."

"His loss, your gain." So much for insecurities this night.

He laughed low in his throat. "I know when he called you he was trying to reach me. He was looking for Jess then too, you know. She'd moved, he knew I'd have her number."

Keep talking John. Keep telling me everything I need to hear to prove I'm doing the right thing.

"And instead he got me." I shrugged nonchalantly as if I had meaningless affairs all the time, forgetting he had been in the room when I was with my mother after she'd passed away. I was quickly reminded, though, when he spoke again.

"Does this mean you're upset with me?"

"About?" I asked, confused.

"About phoning him when your mother passed away." I felt my heart flutter, and my bravado faltered for a brief moment.

"You called him?" I asked, regaining my composure. I had always assumed Kelsi had.

"Yeah, he seemed concerned enough at the time."

So concerned he had flown across the country as soon as he could, thank you very fucking much. He had held me in his arms while I cried, soothing me as I poured my heart out to him, helping me laugh when I needed him the most…

"You look absolutely stunning this evening, Gabriella." His voice was low as he breathed those words into my ear. I closed my eyes and stopped the shudder from flowing through me.

What was I doing?

"I still can't believe he was fool enough to brush you aside," John muttered, still by my ear.

Thanks for the reminder.

A few more people joined us in the elevator so I moved slightly away from him, looking over my shoulder to catch his eye. Perhaps in some way he was just as eager as I was for some sort of retribution for some wrong he felt he'd been dealt. Either way, it was not my concern as we stepped off the elevator and walked down the hall, his hand on the small of my back. As we reached the door of our destination, I felt as if my heart would explode in my chest. I closed my eyes briefly thinking, 'I know it's wrong, I know it's wrong. Damnit, I've been wronged, too.'

"After you," John said.

It was now or never.

I opted for now as I stepped into the suite full of people celebrating the engagement of Jessica and Troy.


	30. Chapter 30

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY**

Even in the sea of people I spotted them; Troy had Jessica wrapped up in his arms, slow dancing to a rather fast song. He was whispering in her ear and she threw her head back in laughter, as my heart was shattering into a million pieces.

Troy had changed clothes since he'd left Kelsi's hotel room. He was now in black pants and a sharp, button down white shirt, the top button undone. His hair was perfectly tousled, he was once again freshly shaven, his dimples flashing as he was smiling…that amazing, heart stopping smile… at her.

Jessica's hair was flowing as he spun her around. Her makeup on her beautiful flawless face was subtle and soft, her brown eyes sparkling as she laughed at yet another sweet-nothing being whispered in her ear. Her peach slip dress fit her perfectly, twirling around her long lightly tanned legs as she swayed to the music, her body fitted up against the man who had been kissing me less than 24 hours before.

I needed to know, I needed to see it with my own two eyes. And I did.

God, it hurt.

John was beside me, his hand still on the small of my back, when a true slow song started playing. It seemed nearly out of place to hear an Eighties tune, "Hands to Heaven," but listening to the haunting tune and the words that followed it was fitting.

"Shall we?" I heard John's voice in my ear, and I turned into his arms easily, as if I'd danced with him a million times before. I could feel several pairs of eyes on me, men eyeing the candy on Dr. John Craig's arm. Knowing that I was becoming a bit of a distraction to those around me was all the empowerment I needed. I twirled my fingers in his short hair and snuggled up closer, placing a sweet, soft kiss on his neck.

There are certain moments in life when time stands still, and you know the memory, whether good or bad, will stay with you forever. When it happens, whether or not you're ready for it, those moments change the path your life is headed on. One of those moments for me was that night as I swayed seductively in John's arms and Troy's eyes met mine.

At first I saw the confusion in those beautiful eyes that were a sparkling blue this evening, then shock as recognition set in, and finally…unreadable as they turned a smoky gray, his jaw set as he stood completely still now, our eyes locked. His breathing quickened as his gaze raked over me…ah, yes, you remember now, don't you, Troy?

Jess turned her attention around towards us to see what had suddenly taken Troy's attention away from her. I'll be damned if she didn't hold on to him just a little bit tighter, a little more possessively as it registered with her exactly who I was. A flush crept into her cheeks, anger flashing in her chocolate brown eyes. I merely smiled at the two of them, the sadist buried deep within me relishing every moment of their suffering. Ah yes, memories can be a real bitch…and I can be an even bigger one.

Troy's eyes were darting between me and John, who had also turned in their direction. He stood behind me, his hands sitting possessively on my hips as other couples danced all around us. Troy's arms were sliding slowly to his own sides in spite of Jessica's arm around him, her hand clutching his shirt as if using it as support.

I leaned back into John easily, pulling his arms around my waist, holding onto his hands, my eyes burning into Troy as I did so. I noted the twitch in his jaw as I did this, and his eyes…tears? Did he have the fucking nerve to stand there in his own fucking engagement party and have tears when he saw John's arms around me? Was this guy fucking real? I couldn't stop the smirk that was forming on my face at this. He wasn't kidding when he said he wanted to win a fucking Oscar.

"Gabriella." It was Jessica who spoke finally as she glared at me.

"And your memory finally returns," I said, my tone biting. "How about yours?" I was looking at Troy then, whose eyes narrowed at my words.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Whatever do you mean?" I asked sweetly. "What am I doing here? Why, Miss Jessica herself invited me, didn't you? She said you wouldn't mind."

Jess opened her mouth to say something, but we were interrupted by an incredibly handsome, and incredibly drunk, man in a suit who was passing out flutes of champagne to everyone he could, dragging a server behind him that was carrying a tray full of them. "Come on, everyone, a toast! We need a toast!"

"Absolutely!" John agreed, taking two of the glasses, handing one to me.

"Dude," the drunken man was saying as he was shoving a glass in Troy's direction. "Man, you have to take one of these. You, too," he said to Jessica who murmured a polite thank you to him.

What a sight it must have made, the four of us standing there, Jessica's eyes glistening with tears; Troy seething at every touch between John and me; John raising his glass in salute; and me…I stood right in the middle, the same place I had been forced to be for weeks. Me, the substitute. Me, the used. Me, the discarded.

I stood just a little taller then, and raised my glass. "A toast!" My voice carried over the crowd who seemed to hush as all eyes fell on us.

"Gabriella, stop," Troy muttered between clinched teeth. I raised an eyebrow, my gaze defiant.

"Now, why would I?" I asked softly. "You certainly didn't know when to stop, did you?"

"A toast!" I heard someone in the background urging me to continue, and I smiled slyly.

"To Jessica and Troy!" I continued, willing my voice steady, praying for strength to keep the tears away. "For finding their way, everyone else be damned. And for those of us left behind, here's to hoping they've actually made up their minds and quit stringing anyone else along. "

The crowd erupted in a chorus of laughter and cheers, several shouts of "Salute!" rang out. I felt gleefully satisfied as I saw a tear fall down Jessica's face, but Troy made no move to comfort her.

"Are you finished?" His voice was low, his knuckles white where he gripped the glass in his hand.

"Yes, I am," I replied, my head held high. I raised my glass again and emptied it in one drink, then turned and walked away.

Mission accomplished.

I assumed John was following me, as I'm sure there would be no verbal confrontation in front of his precious Jessica or all of their guests. My pace was quick and steady as I walked briskly down the hallway past the late arrivals to the elevators. The doors opened as I reached them, several people disembarking, probably heading to that lovely party with that perfect woman and her lying, manipulative, conniving fiancé. More fucking power to them.

I stepped in to the elevator after it emptied, hitting the button to the floor of the nightclub, my back to the doors as they closed. I turned as the elevator started moving, expecting John to be the one standing there.

"Why?" Troy stood there, directly before me, so close if I moved a fraction of an inch I could touch him. His eyes were dark, haunting as he searched my unwavering gaze.

"I could ask you the same fucking question." He hit the emergency stop button and the elevator shuddered as it came to a halt.

"I told you I needed to talk to you,"

"And you should have before last night, don't you think?" I couldn't keep my temper in check any longer, my voice rising. "Or is this customary for you, to keep someone hanging on a string, waiting for you while you bounce back and forth?"

"Damnit Gabriella, all I did…"

"…was kiss me, yes I fucking know," I said between clenched teeth. "And now you have what you always wanted, what you wanted weeks ago when you were sitting in my house, in my living room, when you were in bed with me." I hit the button that started the elevator moving again, but Troy quickly hit the stop button and I jerked forward, instinctively grabbing his arms for support, then pushing him away.

He was visibly attempting to control his emotions before he spoke, but I just couldn't listen to it any more. "John told me…he couldn't fucking wait to tell me how even when you called the first time, you were trying to contact him to find Jess."

"John…that's just…fucking great," I heard him mutter as he ran a shaking hand through his hair.

"So I've been this… what, a substitute? A stand-in?"

"Stop." His voice was soft, his hands shaking.

"What, you can't take the fucking truth? I thought that's what you wanted from me, Troy. God, I can't believe you actually had me thinking you came out here for me!"

"I did."

"You don't have to lie to me anymore," I reminded him, hitting the button that started the elevator moving once more, grabbing his hand as he went to stop the elevator again. He took advantage of this and pulled me up against him. Damnit…damnit…What fucking right did he have to look so hurt?

"Gabriella, listen to me please, you've got it all wrong…"

"Do I?" I asked, maintaining my composure in spite of my body's reaction to him. "I think it was pretty fucking clear." I felt the elevator shutter to a stop as he hit the button again.

"You took it upon yourself to think the worst of me," he said, a mixture of anger and pain in his eyes.

"You're a fucking hypocrite," I hissed at him, pushing him away from me. "Why weren't you honest with me? And don't feed me that line of horseshit that you were going to tell me because you had every opportunity on this planet."

"I was avoiding your reaction," he admitted.

"Because you thought I couldn't fucking handle it. Don't!" I stopped him from interrupting me as he opened his mouth. "Don't you fucking dare turn this around on me! If you had been honest with me to begin with, this never would have happened."

"So you sleep with John to get even?" he yelled at me.

"I'm not like you, Troy!" My voice was even louder as I moved forward. "How's that for thinking the fucking worst of someone? I can't sleep with John…not when I'm in love with you."

He was silent then, his eyes a little wider as I hit the button and the elevator began to move again. By then we had reached the floor I needed and I turned as the elevator doors opened. He reached out and touched my arm, pulling back when I jerked it away.

"Gabriella,"

"Don't," I warned, my voice low as I turned to him. "Just…stop, please, don't do this to me anymore."

"Listen to me…" His voice trailed off as he stood in front of me, not giving a damn who was watching.

"Just stop, please, I can't…" I stepped back as he reached out to touch me. "You have somewhere you're supposed to be right now."

"Christine, please…"

"Just let me get over you," I pleaded, unable to stop the tears any longer. I stepped around him as someone walked up for an autograph, knowing he'd never refuse a fan. Making my escape, I walked quickly towards the club. At the entrance I stopped to glance back and see if he was still there.

Knowing he had someone waiting for him upstairs didn't stop me from wanting to call out to him to follow me, I stood there for just a brief moment, our eyes locked, his seemed to be pleading me to stay.

"Troy!" I heard Jessica's voice as she stepped off the elevator. His eyes slid shut briefly as I turned and entered the club, praying somewhere that someone was listening and would give me the strength I needed.

Somehow, some way, I had to get over him.


	31. Chapter 31

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE**

The wait in line would have been long, but Kelsi and I had been given special VIP passes by Ryan, presumably due to Troy reserving a booth there for the evening. Was this irony? I have no idea since my definition had been forever tainted by Alanis Morrisette. In my slightly tipsy state of mind I made a mental note to contact her and complain.

I needed reinforcements. No, scratch that—I needed more alcohol. Lucky for me they happened to be together, as I saw Kelsi standing by the entirely too large bar that I instantly decided I needed a replica of in my own home. Minus the fact that it was probably bigger than my entire living room.

I was wiping a stray tear from my face as I descended the stairs, my dress attracting attention from males and females alike. Well, wasn't this just my night? The music was loud, pulsing, calling me to the dance floor once my thirst was quenched.

The bar was crowded, loud, full of the beautiful ones as far as the eye could see. All it took was one tap on a tall blonde man's shoulder by me, and the sea of people parted for me to walk through, commanding the attention of all as I waltzed straight up to Kelsi. "Alcohol," I commanded. "And lots of it."

She turned to me with a smile that quickly faded once she saw my face. "What happened?" she asked loudly, and I shook my head as if to say I'd tell her later.

"Long Island," I ordered, placing my money on the bar.

"The booth isn't too far from here, you can put your purse there," Kelsi said into my ear so I could hear her. "Ryan should be back soon."

"What, the engagement party not enough excitement for him?" I asked bitingly, and Kelsi's eyes widened with surprise. "You've got to be fucking kidding me," I muttered, taking my drink and turning towards the booths. I saw Dr. Craig and Ryan talking beside one and walked towards them, Kelsi in tow. Not her too. Did she think this was fucking funny?

Interrupting John and Ryan's heated discussion, I dropped my purse on the table, downed the drink in my hand, and grabbed John's arm. "Dance with me," I whispered in his ear, dragging him onto the floor. Kelsi followed behind us as I lost myself in the sea of pulsating bodies and music.

Glancing up as the obligatory fog machines let go I was caught up in the moment, the gleaming chandelier adding to the ambience, hands all over me as I was surrounded by people I didn't even know. I didn't care. I was beyond caring. The only thing I wanted to feel was Gabriella Christine Montez going down in flames—tonight was the night. Out with the old, in with the new.

Everyone else be damned.

I had a thin sheen of sweat forming a good five songs later…they all seemed to blend together…when I felt Kelsi's hand on my arm, pulling me out of my circle, off of the dance floor, towards the booth. "Wait!" I yelled. "I need another drink."

"You need water," she suggested. "Ward off hangover, Gabi," she added quickly before I could protest. Apparently that excuse was good enough for me as she led me to the large leather booth where three other people sat, attempting to engage in conversation. I was sat next to a female that I didn't know who was fanning herself and drinking what appeared to be water. I reached for my purse to check my phone for messages—how fucking lame was that in the middle of a club? —when my eyes settled on the other two people in the booth.

John was sitting, having a drink, but I could tell the agitation in his face. He glanced over at me and settled back into the couch, a satisfied look on his face and gestured over towards me.

The other man, the one who had been leaning in giving Dr. Craig a total earful of something the rest of us couldn't hear, looked over in my direction, and when I saw those stormy gray eyes settle on me I felt my heart drop to my feet. He was half-standing, one knee resting on the couch, his arm using the back of the couch to hold him steady as he had been going off on whatever tirade he'd decided to unleash, perhaps to assuage his own guilt and place the blame elsewhere.

Troy was angry.

And Troy only had himself to blame.

I stood to go back to the dance floor, but Kelsi was in front of me, handing me some water. "You need to sit down, Gabi," she said.

"What, is this some kind of intervention?" I snapped. I had grabbed some money from my purse, so I set the water down and tried to step around her. Troy placed his hand on my arm and I brushed him off.

"Leave her alone," I heard John say, and when Troy's head snapped around to look at him again I brushed past everyone, back towards the bar. I happened to brush up against one of the men I had danced with and he gladly assisted me up to the bar to make my order.

Ah yes. Another Long Island. I held up my drink in thanks and Mr. Blonde Jock took that as an invitation to place one of his beefy arms possessively around me and lead me towards his pack of frat boys. Yippee, just what I needed, but who the hell cared as I made quick work of my drink while listening to them try to out-testosterone each other with their tales of exactly which one of them was man enough for the likes of me. I motioned that I was going back to the bar, but Mr. Blonde Jock offered to go for me and I shrugged. Fuck it, the less work I had to do the better, so I turned for the dance floor with two of the five following me.

The moment "More Human Than Human" came on, I could feel Kelsi's presence beside me—we'd torn up many a dance floor to this song. I closed my eyes, feeling the music run through me as much as the alcohol; dress and heels be damned, Kelsi and I were dancing our asses off. I could feel the occasional touch of the frat boys as they tried circling in, but Kelsi pulled on my arm as the song ended and I followed, breathless and laughing.

"Ah, Kelsi…I'm free," I mumbled, collapsing into the booth.

"No, Gabi, you're drunk," she corrected me, handing me the water I'd left on the table. The booth was conspicuously empty minus the two of us and she pushed me further in, blocking my immediate way out. "I don't know what happened, I'm not going to pry…"

"Oh bullshit, you don't know what happened," I spat out. "You knew he was with Jessica." She opened her mouth to say something, then closed it again, signaling to me she was admitting defeat. I rolled my eyes as I took another drink of water and stood to walk around the other side of the booth.

"Gabriella, wait!" I heard her call after me, but I ignored her as I walked back over to the frat boys.

"Where's my drink?" I asked Mr. Blonde Jock seductively.

"Well you disappeared, so I drank it," he said with a shrug. "I was all like…dudes, where'd she go? You know? So…yeah, I drank it."

Oh yay. This one was real articulate.

Fuck it.

"So, go get me another," I commanded, pointing towards the bar, and Mr. Blonde Jock was all too happy to oblige. I stood with the other boys, holding court if you will as they all seemed mesmerized by anything I said. Either that or they were staring at my boobs, but either way I had their full attention, and that was what mattered. I noticed Troy heading back to the booth, and completely ignoring every screaming fiber of my being, I turned away from him instead of running straight to his arms, begging him to give us half the shot we deserved.

Drinking—sometimes not a good idea.

"The hour is late, Cinderella," Mr. Blonde Jock said as he held my drink out. I had to refrain from rolling my eyes as he made some stupid fucking joke about my coach turning into a pumpkin, blah blah blah, as I did my obligatory quick inspection of my drink. I almost laughed at myself, noting some of my obsessive-compulsive quirks that followed me no matter how inebriated. Seeing no signs of anything out of the ordinary I took a small sip, and noting that it tasted the same, I resolved myself to this drink being safe. Hey, I've had friends that have ended up with their drinks spiked with that lovely drug; I wasn't about to be another statistic.

"So, what do you do for a living?" one of the boys over to my left asked. I turned to him so he could hear me and he leaned down a little.

"I'm a nurse," I replied.

"Really? Like at a hospital?" he asked, keeping my attention.

No, dumbass, at a morgue.

"Yes," I said. "I'm a registered nurse, considering specializing in cardiology."

"Awesome," he commented, smiling as he stood back up. I turned again, seeing Mr. Blonde Jock touching my straw.

"It was falling out," he said, loud enough for me to hear him, and I nodded. He was asking me another question that I pretended to listen to as I began to quickly down my Long Island, knowing I'd need a hell of a lot of alcohol to deal not only with him but with Kelsi when the night was through. Without warning I felt a strong hand on my waist as another reached around me, yanking the drink out of my hand roughly.

"What the hell?" I demanded as I turned around to see Troy yelling at security to get Mr. Blonde Jock, who had mysteriously disappeared from my side, and his friends the hell out of the nightclub. "What the fuck are you doing?" I reached for my drink, but he held it away from me, his other arm securely around my waist.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice…his eyes full of concern. Please don't be nice to me…not now…not when I can't take it…

"Give me back my drink and I'll be just fucking fine!" I exclaimed, pushing at him and grabbing the glass. I stopped suddenly, noting the film of white powder around the side. "Oh…God…"

"You drank so much of that," he was saying, taking the glass from me and handing it to Ryan, who had somehow ended up beside us. His hands caressed the sides of my face bringing tears to my eyes. "We need to get you out of here."

"No…no…"

"Gabi, listen to me…this wasn't a big glass, you drank most of it, we have to go."

"Please don't touch me." I know he couldn't hear me I said it so softly, my eyes closed against the tears, but I felt his hands move away.

"Gabriella, open your eyes." Ryan's voice in my ear snapped me back into reality. "Listen, you go with Troy, we got a better look at them than he did. Trust me…trust him. Go." I was beginning to shake, possibly from fear, but I nodded, reaching out blindly until I found Troy's hand. "Take my room."

"Less chance of being seen, I know," I heard Troy mutter as he squeezed my hand, motioning me to follow him.

"Don't you need…distance?" My words were starting to slur and he pulled me closer, his arm around me as we walked as fast as we could.

"Stay with me," he said as we stepped out of the club, the noise level dropping incredibly as my steps faltered. "Come on, Gabi, just a little bit further." His voice in my ear caused the goose bumps on my arms to rise and he laughed softly. "Oh, sure…now," he said, winking slightly at me. I started to laugh then quickly stopped as I remembered I was pissed at him. "You know it's funny, you know you wanna laugh." We stepped into the elevator, me giving him the evil eye. As the doors shut and we were alone once more, he reached over and tucked a curl behind my ear.

"Please don't," I begged, tears threatening almost immediately. He stepped in front of me, helping to prop me up on the wall, his hands so gentle as he caressed my arms. I closed my eyes, grief consuming me as I felt the first sob escape me. "How could you?" was all I could ask, unable to fight as he pulled me into his arms as I cried. "Why…did you…"

He said nothing, no soothing words, no protests of innocence as he held me, breathing me in as I cried helplessly in his arms. I heard the doors open and was startled as he stepped back, helping me out of the elevator.

"We're almost there," he said, his voice shaky. "Come on, Gabi, please…"

"No…I need to stop," I remember saying, putting a hand to my head as the alcohol consumed me.

"Stay with me." His voice was stern, his hands on my face and I opened my eyes to argue with him. "Damnit, Gabriella, you know better…you don't turn your back, you don't leave your drink unguarded,"

"Save your bartender's lecture," I snapped at him, my anger bringing me back around as I pushed his hands away. "What, no Jess here?"

"This door, right here Gabi," he said, ignoring my question which pissed me off even more.

"What, you can't answer me now?" I asked, giving him a slight shove that didn't even faze him as he opened the door, pulling me into the room. "Come on, Troy…where is she? Does she know where you're at? Is this how you're going to treat her all the time?" He drug me by my arm back to the bedroom area of the suite. "Fuck you, get your hands off me!" I tried to fight him, but instead I ended up imbalanced. He placed his arms around me and gently laid me on the bed.

"You'll be okay, Gabi, I promise." Why did he have to sound that way, like I'd hurt him? And why the hell was he taking my shoes off?

"Troy, stop…"

"I have to call John. He'll know what to do." His hand was still on my leg, caressing me sweetly, gently.

"I'm just so tired," I said, my eyelids heavy as he leaned in, kissing me on my forehead. "Please don't leave."

"I'll be right here," he whispered against my skin. I sighed, allowing the chemicals to overtake me.


	32. Chapter 32

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO**

The room was still dark when I was startled awake by a strong hand on my wrist. I jerked back with a screech scrambling to the opposite side of the bed, the light from the living area of the suite casting a shadow on the face of the man sitting on the bed beside me.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked, panicked, pulling the covers around me.

"Relax, Gabriella," he said, and he voice sounded vaguely familiar. "I'm Dr. Burke, I spoke at the seminar yesterday. I'm checking to see how you are, and it seems you are definitely becoming more lucid."

"More lucid?" I asked, completely confused. I looked down and noticed I'd somehow managed to change from that little black dress into my silky camisole and my favorite pair of jammie bottoms. What the hell?

"From what I've been told, you've been in and out of it most of the night," Dr. Burke explained. "Not to worry, Dr. Craig signed you into the seminar. Given the circumstances it's the least he could do. Speaking of Dr. Craig and such, why did you leave the party in such a hurry?"

Dr. Craig…the party…oh, God, the engagement party, the one for Jess and Troy. I hid my face in my hands and shook my head slightly, groaning at the pain there.

Wait…Troy… I had left the club with him. I lifted my head as Dr. Burke was taking my blood pressure from the arm he had pried free. "Where's Troy?"

"Right here," Dr. Burke said with a smile, and I looked around the room.

"Oh, out there?" I asked, pointing towards the door.

"I'm being facetious," he replied with a grin that I could see now with my eyes adjusting. Wow, he really did look familiar. "Well, somewhat. I know who you're looking for. He had an appointment, or prior engagement of some kind. He asked that I tell you that he will be right back."

A prior engagement. No shit.

"Okay," was all I could say, feeling a fresh wave of hurt, along with a tad bit of nausea.

"You're going to feel pretty much wiped out today," Dr. Burke said as he stood and tousled his hair…wow, again with the…wait, he acted like Troy. That's what it was about him that struck me as familiar. "Get rest, drink plenty of fluids, but nothing from strangers." He laughed softly to himself as if he thought he was the funniest person in this world. "So…the infamous Gabriella."

"Pardon?" I asked, curling back under the covers as I propped myself up on the pillows.

"Hey…" I heard Troy say as he stuck his head in. "I made it back, thanks for checking on her."

"Looks like she made it back, too," Dr. Burke said as he turned towards the door where Troy stood. Troy took a tentative step into the room, still holding onto the frame.

"How are you?" He sounded so sweet and caring, it caused my heart to ache just a little more.

"Alive, apparently," I replied, quickly adding "Thank you." He smiled at me, his genuine smile that sent a chill up my spine.

"Not a problem." I held his gaze just a moment longer before Dr. Burke interrupted us.

"Got a minute?" he asked Troy, motioning that they should move into the other room.

"Yeah," Troy replied, then turned to me. "Are you okay?" I nodded, and he said, "Kelsi brought some of your stuff up last night. I didn't know if you remembered or not."

"No, but I kinda figured," I said with a smile, tugging at my camisole. He smiled briefly, wistfully, before turning to walk out to the living area. Dr. Burke followed him pulling the door to, but not completely shutting it.

I knew I had to be some kind of hot mess as I couldn't even remember changing clothes, so I slowly made my way off the bed, my legs just a little weak. I walked to the washroom, scowling as I turned the light on and it hurt my eyes.

I expected to see hair up all over the place, makeup running down my face, raccoon eyes, the whole nine yards. Instead, I saw the black dress folded neatly and hanging over a rack behind me, towels folded over the tub, and a washrag by the sink, rinsed and folded but clearly had been used to wash off makeup.

I looked into the mirror, confusion settling over me. Had I…taken a bath or something last night? My hair was soft, free of all of the product I had put in it yesterday, and the curls while a bit on the messy side were definitely…well, clean. I touched my face gingerly, no trace of makeup left, so clean it had a little shine to it. If I could barely remember coming up to this room, how in this world could I have…

A foggy memory hit me like a brick and I held on to the sink to steady myself.

Troy.

He'd sat me on the edge of the tub and knelt in front of me, white washcloth in hand as he'd gently wiped my face. I had been crying, apologizing, and he'd said…had he said anything? I couldn't remember. I know he had placed one finger lightly on my lips and had continued gently wiping my face, taking special care around my eyes…

My eyes that were now filled with tears, my heart with confusion. Why had he stayed with me? He could have easily called Kelsi, or left me with John.

And the dress…I remembered a warm bath, hands gently massaging my temples, moving through my hair, water gently flowing down my back. His arms, wrapping a towel around me and holding me close.

Why?

I had to know.

Dr. Burke was still in the living area talking to Troy; I could hear bits and pieces of the conversation, not that it made much sense. I was about to open the door when the tone of Dr. Burke's voice stopped me.

"Damnit, I thought this shit was…done, all of it. This isn't fucking high school anymore."

"No shit, Travis," I heard Troy snap back.

"And there you go. Same shit, different day, more people caught in the fucking middle."

"You think I meant for this to happen?" Troy asked. "Any of it? Jess and I talked about this; she's happy, I'm happy."

"Really? She didn't look too happy last night, especially not when you ran after your friend there." I stood frozen on the spot, my hand on the door. "And what about your friend?"

"That's not your concern." Troy's voice was low.

"Not my concern, but you call not just John, but me to check her, make sure she's okay. So now not only are you being dishonest with people, I have to skirt around the issue, act like everything's okay…do you really think I could tell Jess I was coming here?"

"She wouldn't mind, Travis, so you may as well tell her." I could hear Troy sighing. "All this time and you couldn't figure out she'd have more compassion than that?"

"Compassion or not, what happened last night has definitely changed Jess's outlook on everything. She says she wants to speak with you before we leave this afternoon."

I blinked in surprise. What the hell was Jess doing leaving with Dr. Burke?

"Like you said…we're not in high school anymore, Travis. You don't have to act so defensive."

"No, we're not in high school, and yet you still can't get my name right. Let's just forget it's the same as yours."

No…no, no, no…I couldn't have been that wrong.

Troy Burke.

Troy and Jessica.

Another wave of nausea hit, and I wasn't so sure it was residual from the previous night. I kept asking myself what I had done as I sat on the edge of the bed, tears welling up again.

God…what had I done?

I waited until I was sure Dr. Burke had left before I stood to go out to Troy…I so didn't know what to say, how to say it, where to start. When I reached out for the door it swung open suddenly and I jumped as Troy was walking into the bedroom.

"Sorry," he said with a soft smile. "I didn't mean to startle you."

I was trembling slightly when I reached out for his hand. "I…didn't get a chance to really thank you."

"Actually you did," he replied with a slight grin. "Over and over." He caressed my hand softly as he reached up and tucked some curls behind my ear. "Okay, and that sounded wrong. I promise nothing happened, scouts honor."

"Did I tell you that I was sorry?"

"Yep, that too." He kissed my forehead softly and I felt a tear fall. "No more tears," he whispered, cupping my face in his hands. "Time's not on our side right now, Gabi, and I swear to you…please, this time listen to me…okay?" I nodded, tears still hanging on my lashes. "Trust me?" I hesitated before answering, and he dropped his gaze. "Okay, I deserve that."

"Wait…Troy, please." I reached out, touching him softly, almost afraid he would step away. "It wasn't you…isn't you, it isn't you, is it?" He shook his head 'no' and I felt the tears rise again. "She's marrying Dr. Burke…not you."

"Yeah," he said softly. I sobbed again, full of shame over how I had acted, what I had done. He held me against his chest where I could hear his heart hammering in his chest. "Well, damn…and here I thought you'd be happy over that one." I had to laugh at that one and I swatted him, to which he replied, "Damn…mmmm, that was nice, hey…OW!" I hit him harder this time.

"Fucker," I muttered against his chest.

"What was that for?" he asked, pulling back and smiling down at me. "For taking care of you, for washing your hair, for behaving myself and dressing you instead of taking full advantage and ravishing you? Believe me, it takes great self-restraint."

"I don't understand…after all I've done…"

"You wouldn't have," he stopped my rant.

"After last night…God, I almost…"

"Don't," he said suddenly, closing his eyes. "I don't even want to think about what could have happened. And I would have felt completely responsible."

"For what, my actions?" I asked, confused.

"My…dishonesty. You're right, Gabriella," he stopped me from interrupting him. "Omission is pretty much the same. I didn't give you a reason to trust me, and I'm sorry."

"And I went and fucked everything up, just like me," I muttered through my tears.

"Christine…"

"No, I did!" I stepped away from him, throwing my arms up. "You kept telling me not to think the worst of you, you kept telling me you wanted to talk…"

He silenced me with a kiss. His lips were so very soft, teasing, erasing all thought from my mind.

"What was I saying?" I asked breathlessly, and he smiled down at me.

"Exactly."


	33. Chapter 33

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE**

"Did you have sex in that bed?" Ryan asked, eyeballing Troy as we were collecting my things. "Dude, if you had sex in that bed, you're so keeping this room."

"No, dickhead, we didn't have sex," Troy replied, giving him a slight shove.

"Apparently I tried," I piped up. "Or so I've been told, I think he's lying."

"I'm not lying," he said as he walked past me, kissing me sweetly on the cheek. "You want me."

"I was under the influence," I half-joked.

"Which is why I said no," he whispered in my ear, and I blushed in spite of myself. Only remembering bits and pieces, I couldn't have told anyone if I'd actually slept with him; I certainly remembered curling into him, teasing his neck to the point where he'd almost given in. Anything past that, though, I had to rely on his memory and his word.

"Hey," Kelsi said as she walked into the room. She was looking rather sheepish, avoiding eye contact with me thinking I was still angry with her. I admit I had my issues with everyone who thought it best that I was kept out of the dark, but that was not the time or the place to deal with it. "How are you feeling?"

"With my hands," I answered, grinning when the comment caused a slight blush to come to Troy's cheeks.

"You're going up to your suite then?" Ryan asked, and Troy nodded. "We stayed in Kelsi's room last night, you know…just in case."

"Which means I don't have to ask if you had sex in my room," Troy said, laughing as Ryan shot him a look.

"What, is this musical rooms or something?" I asked a short time later as Troy and I were leaving Ryan's room.

"After what happened last night, we were just…avoiding, you know…"

"The press? Do you think they could get up there?"

"Probably not, but…"

"You were avoiding more than the press," I cut him off. We stepped into the elevator, only going up one floor to get to his room.

"Yes," he finally said as the door closed.

"Jess?" I asked. "Or John?"

"Both," he admitted. "I wanted to rip his fucking head off, you know? Well, minus the fact that he's built like a giant and would kill me."

"He's not, and he wouldn't." Troy raised an eyebrow at my first comment. "I just danced with him, Troy. You saw the extent of what happened." He avoided commenting as the elevator doors opened and we made the short walk to his suite. Once inside, he set my bag that he'd been carrying by the door and reached around me helping push the door closed. I stood there between him and the door, his arm still propped on it. He looked down at me, his eyes dropping to my lips before he smirked and pushed himself upright, walking across the room to the couch and sitting down. He patted the couch beside him.

"If you can keep your hands to yourself I'll let you sit beside me," he said with a wink.

"Oh, whatever," I replied. "You and your damn ego, like it needs any more stroking."

"That wasn't my ego you were stroking last night, sweetheart," he quipped. "Or do you need to be told about that, too? Like you don't fucking remember." I sat on the far side of the couch and he laughed, grabbing a hold of my shirt and pulling me to his side. He leaned back and propped his feet up on the coffee table, holding me close to him as he used the remote to turn on the TV.

"I have to keep my hands to myself and you get to do this?" I asked.

"No," he drew the word out and I looked up at his face searching for any clue of what he was about to do. "I get to do…this."

Without warning he had pushed me back onto the couch, pinning my arms above my head, lying on top of me. His face was mere inches from mine, his smile showing in his eyes as we breathed as one.

"You, sir…are an insufferable tease," I was able to say, my stomach doing that whole flip thing when I saw him lightly bite his bottom lip.

"No, I…am simply getting even…" His voice trailed off as he left small kisses on my forehead, down to my cheek, my body reacting as he shifted slightly to gain better access to my neck. "Aren't you…" He kissed right below my earlobe…"so lucky…" he moved slightly lower, little nibbles along that sensitive line…"that I'm…" His tongue was wreaking havoc as he teased that spot, right where my pulse is…"a complete gentleman."

"Gentleman my ass," I moaned as he kissed along my jaw line to the other side of my neck.

"Mmmm, but I am." He started low, at the base of my neck this time. "No matter…" Oooohhhh that was gonna leave a mark…"how many times…" Again, where my pulse was hammering…"you said please…" I whimpered as he made his way up the side of my neck…"please…" I strained against his hands that held me steady when he kissed up my ear…"Please…" My hips moved against him as he breathed into my ear…"I still said…" His face hovered over mine, one slight movement and his lips would be on mine…"No."

And with a smirk he pushed himself off me and walked across the room.

"Oh, you asshole," I muttered breathlessly as I heard him grab a drink from his refrigerator.

"SUCKS, doesn't it?" he asked, pointing at me accusingly.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I replied innocently, still lying down as I watched him down half a bottle of water.

"Suuuure you don't," he said, his eyebrow still raised at me. He adjusted his jeans to accommodate him better. "You are the epitome of evil, just so you fucking know."

"I am no such thing," I protested, biting my bottom lip to keep from sighing as I looked at him standing there, propped against the wall, the look of pure heat in his eyes. He frowned suddenly and looked at his feet before looking back up at me.

"I hated seeing his hands on you." I sat up slowly, watching the range of emotions play across his face. "He should have never touched you, not like…"  
His voice trailed off and he looked away briefly. "I don't know if that's what got me, or if it was…"

"Or if it was what?" I asked, knowing no matter how uncomfortable we had seen the consequences of avoiding subjects.

"If it was how you were touching him."

"And now you know," I said, keeping eye contact with him, willing the tears to stay away.

"Now I know what?" he asked, his brow furrowed.

"How I felt," I replied. "For me to see you with Jess, not just last night, but at the hotel in Albuquerque. How you didn't even tell me she was going to be here and then she tells me…"

"…that she's marrying Trav…Troy," he finished for me.

"But there's a difference," I continued. "I don't have a history with John, and you have yet to say whether or not you're over Jess."

"Touché," he whispered. "It's… it's complicated, Gabi, I'm not going to lie and say that it's all cut and dry. But she's happy, and I'm…not…replacing her, and I know that doesn't make sense, but…"

"What?" I cut him off, remembering his journal suddenly. He shrugged and shifted uncomfortably.

"When I left Florida," he began, "I was an absolute fucking mess. And I met Elizabeth, and things just…well, things were. And after awhile I thought, what the hell…you know, my past…Jess…it was over, so I put my heart on the line. Again." He took in a deep, shuddering breath. "And I've told you about that, about her, so you know how much of a success that was." His eyes narrowed slightly as he looked at me, both of us remembering our phone conversations, even though they seemed a lifetime ago.

"I remember," I said softly.

"I've never lived the life of a monk, at least not since all this…success, if you will. But…my heart was never on the line. I wouldn't let it be." He looked over at me again, his expression softening slightly. "I don't know why I've been so reluctant to talk to you about this. I've never had to worry about putting my guard up with you, never had to… pretend…anything. Not all those years ago," he paused again, tilting his head just slightly, "and not now. When it comes down to it, you're right up there, one of the only women I've ever been honest with, and I mean…God, that sounds wrong considering what we've been through, doesn't it?"

"Yes and no," I answered. He walked over and knelt before me, gently holding my hands. His eyes were bright, shining with emotion, and when he spoke to me, my heart sang.

"Minus the lack of communication…when I'm with you, it's because I want to be with you. Not Jess, not anyone else. You."

I kissed him then, still holding his hands as I teased his lips open with mine, sighing as our kiss deepened. He backed away, almost reluctantly, smiling softly as he lightly traced the side of my face with his fingertip.

"I know I've told you that I'm sorry," I said, "but I feel I owe you more than that." Troy shook his head in return.

"You don't," His voice was barely above a whisper.

"I don't owe you, or you don't want to hear the explanation?"

"Both?" It sounded like a question, but he'd answered truthfully. "I just don't know if…"

"Jess isn't the only one you have a problem getting over," I stated, observing his reaction closely. "I'm not Elizabeth, Troy. The things I said, the things I did…it was out of hurt, and out of anger, but I wouldn't…I couldn't be with anyone else. And yes, it was a really fucking stupid…game, for lack of a better word, but I wanted you to hurt the way I did. And that was wrong, regardless of the circumstances."

He was quiet for a moment, contemplative. "I suppose…" He stopped for just a moment, then continued. "Yeah, I know…I still have a problem with the whole Liz thing, I know." He laughed softly, running his fingers through his hair. "Fuck, aren't we just a pair? What about you, do you have any demons from your past that you're running from?"

"Just myself," I answered honestly. "And that's not…Okay, it's relevant, but…"

"In time," he said, pulling me in for another soft kiss. "But for now…don't kill me, you were supposed to be at that seminar and I have to get down to the local TV station, so…you rest."

"Yes sir." I laid back on the couch as he stood, his eyes taking in the length of me. "What are you doing?"

"Contemplating whether or not to cancel."

"Go," I said, swatting at his legs. "I've caused you enough trouble this weekend."

"Don't sweat it," he said with a smile. "You're worth it."

I had drifted back off to sleep shortly after he left to the sounds of TV Land in the background. I was startled awake by persistent knocking at the door. I was unsure of who it was, so I quietly made my way over and looked through the small peephole in the door.

Oh, God.

It was Jessica.


	34. Chapter 34

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR**

I opened the door, bracing myself for it.

There she stood, Ms. Perfect, her beautiful dark hair swept up off her shoulders, her brown eyes registering…shock? Ah, there it is… recognition. In her pristine cream-colored suit she looked ready for the runway, apparently making a conscious effort to get someone's attention. I was sure that person wasn't me.

I was happy knowing I'd gone against my original plan and had applied light makeup. I left my curls down free, falling past my shoulders and framing my face just the way Troy preferred them. I was wearing a pair of navy blue yoga pants that hugged my hips and a tight long-sleeved white shirt…comfortable, a far cry from the game of dress up from the night before. No, I wasn't ready to hit the town; I was ready for a night in with the man who was coming back to me, ex girlfriend be damned…

Right?

"I see he hasn't learned," she finally said, waltzing past me, the slight scent of vanilla following her.

"Hi, is Troy here? No? Fine, I'll come back later," I said as sweetly as I could, trying in vain to curb the sarcasm.

"Even better," she replied, ignoring my barbs. She sat on the couch and crossed her ankles demurely. "I see the dress worked for you. Congratulations, you got him to sleep with you. I truly hope you're not deluding yourself into thinking you're special."

"You think that was our first night together?" I asked, crossing the room towards her, omitting that we didn't have sex the night before. "My, you are a naïve one." For one brief moment her eyes betrayed her, and I knew I'd struck a nerve.

"Ah, well, Troy's only human. He makes mistakes once in a while."

"What are you doing here Jessica?"

"No, the question is, what are YOU doing here, Gabi?"

"I'm here," I said, opening the refrigerator and pulling out a Diet Pepsi as if I owned the place, "because Troy brought me here. I'm here because he wants me here. I'm here because he planned for me to be here. Any more questions, Jess? Or are you going to answer mine?"

"I'm here to keep him from making an even bigger mistake," she replied, unable to hide her disdain.

"So…you don't want him, but you don't want him to be with me? Charming."

"He's out of your league." She looked me up and down, not finding my lounging clothes any more appealing than the dress from the night before. "Far, far out of your league."

"I hardly think Mr. Rock Star agrees with you."

"And that," she said, pointing at me, "is exactly my point. You see him as Troy the Rock Star, and you latched on to him the first chance you got."

"Do you not remember the hospital? What you walked in on then? I can give you a refresher course if need be."

"Spare me," she cut me off. "I know your type all too well. Unfortunately, Troy has yet to learn when he picks up trash he needs to put it in the garbage can where it belongs."

"He's already learned that, Jessica," I retorted. "He let you go, didn't he?"

"My history with Troy," she returned, "can never be matched by whatever fling the two of you have. And trust me, Gabi, that's just what it is. A fling."

"Is that the best you can do?" I asked, unfazed. "Come on, Jess, don't disappoint me. You've been dying to do this for…how many years now?"

"And what about you?" she replied. "How many years have you wanted to have this conversation with me?"

"So…all this time, poor little Jessica has been eating herself alive over little ol' me." I sat on the barstool, drinking my Diet Pepsi as if I hadn't a care in the world, trying to ignore my racing heart.

"Don't flatter yourself." If it were humanly possible for eyes to shoot daggers I would have been dead right then. "Oh, and nice story you handed him all those years ago… dying mother, huh? Took her quite some time, didn't it? And John tells me it was a heart attack."

She shoots, she scores. Thanks for the memories, doll face…here, let me return the favor.

"And what kind of lies did you feed him so he'd fall for you, Jess?" I shot back. "You know, all those times he and I had intimate talks in the hospital, he barely ever talked about you. What do you think that says, Jessica? He barely talked about his best friend. He told me about his brother. He told me things that he said he never told anyone. When he had a problem, he came to_ me_. Let's say that again, in case you missed it. He trusted _me_, Jessica."

She opened her mouth for what I'm sure was one hell of a comeback, but I was far from done. You want to hurt me? Try this on for size.

"So…how was your anniversary dinner, Jess? How'd it go after he had his hands on me? After he was kissing me?" I smiled then, knowing no matter how sweet her memories of that night were it was time to put her in her damn place…the past. Omission, how many times had I argued with Troy that it was the same as lying? And yet there I was not saying it was me, all me that evening… after the call telling me my father was gone, wanting to erase everything, lose myself in his eyes, those lips…and remembering how he'd pulled away…No, that was the past. He wouldn't pull away now.

"If it meant that much to you then tell me, Gabi…" The way she spat my name out was completely venomous, I had to give her that much. "Where did you disappear to? How many years were in between? And why was it…oh, and this one…come on, let's hear this answer, Gabi…why was it that there you were, back in his life, and didn't even have the guts to tell him it was you. Oh, wait…did you not remember? And he didn't even put it together that it was you, did he? What, you think attempting to dress like a normal functioning member of society instead of a street walker would make you more credible?"

What was I supposed to say then? Gee, Ms. Perfect, I was spiraling out of control, I spent those days in a fog, and even though Troy had been a shining beacon then I had marred that with my actions at the restaurant. What could I say? Oh, right.

"Unlike you, I don't live in the past."

"You think I'm part of the past? Who's naïve now?"

"I'm sure your fiancé will be pleased to hear that," I said, finishing my Diet Pepsi and setting the empty can on the bar. "I saw him earlier, you know. I believe his exact words were 'this isn't high school.' Perhaps you should keep that in mind."

"Let's cut the crap, Gabriella. You're not good enough for him."

"And you think you are? He's done with you, Jessica. He's been done with you since high school."

"Troy has been a part of my life for the last twenty-five years. You think that's nothing? I was his first. His first love, the first girl he's ever been with--You--You were merely a distraction. Like I said, a fling. You think if I asked him to pick between the two of us, he'd pick you? Don't fool yourself, Gabi. I'm his best friend--"

"This isn't high school anymore, Jessica." I had to reiterate that fact yet again. "He and I have a history now. It won't be as easy as you thought it would be."

"You're not good enough for him." So you keep fucking telling me, sweetheart.

"And you're getting fucking married. You're the one who let him go. You're the one who made a mistake. Don't punish me for YOUR mistake, Jess--"

"He doesn't love you. Don't you get that?"

How could I argue with that? God…how could I? I had poured my heart out to him, I'd told him I was in love with him, and what did I get in return? Oh right… I wasn't a fucking replacement…

"You think coming into this room, batting your eyes, bringing up the past is going to make him walk away from me?"

"So says the girl who came to my engagement party in her little black dress. Are you sure Troy wanted you here? Because he certainly didn't tell you about the party, or about me. Oh, and…let's face it, it was so obvious…you thought I was marrying Troy Bolton. Not a fling? Are you sure about that?"

"I have heard about you," I replied, still doing my best to keep my cool. "I know Elizabeth never did, possibly no one else either. But I have. Tell me, Jess…how much did you hear about me?" Her cheeks looked slightly pink at my question…ah, the journal.

Perhaps there was more to the omission of me than I originally thought.

"What, no intimate details of what we've shared? No proclamations of him wishing that I was you?" Her eyes narrowed as she looked at me. "Come on, Jess…it's eating you up inside, isn't it? How many others did he fail to mention in that sweet little book he wrote out for you? You think I haven't seen the journal, Jessica? Please. He left it behind…in Albuquerque…when he flew out there to see me."

"In Albuquerque," she repeated, her eyebrow raised.

"Right, you know where you met him at his hotel? Yeah, that was just a few short hours after he left my bed."

"You're not the first person he's screwed that he wasn't in love with, Gabi. You're just…next."

I heard the click of the door as Troy used his keycard to enter. I held my tongue at my hateful reply as both Jessica and I turned towards the door. Troy entered, smiling to himself as he probably thought he'd be seeing just me lying there on the couch as he left me, stopping short when he saw Jessica sitting there.

Jessica who turned on her fucking charm and smiled so sweetly at him…a smile he returned.

Which left me back on the outside looking in.


	35. Chapter 35

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE**

"Watch this…the look on your face," Troy pointed at the TV that was replaying the cell phone video that someone had taken. It was when we were at the elevator, when Troy had made his 'oh sure now' joke, and he was laughing softly. "That look is priceless. You know you wanted to laugh." I was curled up next to him on the couch with his arm resting behind me comfortably, his fingers twirling through my hair.

"But they also saw pieces of the argument before we ever went into the club," I reminded him.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," he said, lightly kissing the top of my head. "See, that proves we knew each other, and you weren't…"

"Some cheap skank you picked up in a bar," I cut him off, and he nudged me.

"Stop talking like that," he chided me.

"Many things have been said about the dress…and not just on TV."

"That dress is hot." His tone made me warm in all the right places. "Especially all folded up sitting beside that bathtub."

"Perv," I teased, laughing when he reached over and poked my side.

"You don't mind staying in?" he asked, and I shot him an incredulous look.

"After last night? You're kidding, right?"

"Just checking," he said with a smile.

"And what about you? You don't mind?" I looked up at him, falling even harder as he placed a soft kiss on my lips.

"This is what I came here for," he replied. "So…other things got in the way." He shrugged, that half-smirk on his face that he was so famous for. "I came out here to see you, spend time with you…like this."

"Minus five tons of salt on the popcorn," I joked, then accepted the few kernels he placed in my mouth, licking his fingers in the process. From my position I heard his heart slightly speed up.

"And the beer on the couch," he added. "Then again…nah, I'm already in trouble for the last hotel room we shared."

"When did…oh." I blushed, remembering tables we had overturned as we had christened nearly every part of that room. His eyebrows were raised at me, as if he was offended that it had slipped my mind. "Well, that room fared better than my headboard did." He laughed then, and for some unfathomable reason my body was reacting just by the slight movement.

"I'd say sorry," he began, as he tangled his fingers in my hair, "but I'm not."

"Are you sure about that?" I asked, remembering how he'd said we shouldn't have slept together that first night.

"Technically," he said, as if he was reading my mind, "I'm not sorry about either time. I'm only sorry about the…complications? And I'm not even sure if that's the word I'm looking for."

"Complications," I repeated, studying his face.

"This whole miscommunication thing," he clarified. "You know, the one I'm out here to fix, fine job I did in the beginning as I failed miserably." I couldn't stop the tear that fell down my cheek; he did this, rearranged his schedule, went through hell and back to make it to Las Vegas, to "fix" this.

He wouldn't do that for just a fling, would he?

"If it was working, you wouldn't be crying," he said, his voice as gentle as his touch when he reached over with his free hand and caught the tear with his fingertip. "I don't want you to be sad, Christine."

"Right now, right at this moment…I'm about the furthest from sad I could be." I know my words contradicted the tears, but he understood my meaning and welcomed me into his arms as I turned, straddling him to freely kiss him the way I'd been wanting to all day.

His arms closed around me, his hands wide, protective as he held me to him, our kisses full of feeling…emotion, rather than simply passion. He pulled back slightly, burying his face in the crook of my neck and just…held me. He held me as if I was precious, cherished, treasured, and my heart soared. I was still straddling him, stroking his hair as he breathed me in. When he finally sat back, his eyes were shining, a light bluish gray as he studied my face.

"I've kept telling myself I was going to behave," he said, his hands still slightly caressing my back. "Not that I trusted myself to…but I have the best of intentions."

I tilted my head slightly as I held his gaze, feeling exactly how…hard it was for him to control himself from my position. "Mind if I ask why?"

"This…isn't why I came here… Christine, don't move like that please…" His eyes slid shut as I adjusted my position, partially more comfortable, definitely more arousing, for the both of us. He opened his eyes partially, the sheer heat of his gaze making my pulse quicken. His voice was hoarse, raspy, when he asked, "What have you done to me?"

I caressed the side of his face with my fingertips, tracing along the edge of his jaw where just a hint of stubble was beginning to grow. Our eyes never lost contact as I answered him in the most honest way I could.

"All I've done is love you."

His hands stilled and his breath quickened ever so slightly at my words. His lips parted slightly as if he was going to say something to me, but we both remained silent, breathing in unison, my words hanging in the air between us. It wasn't as if I hadn't told him before, but that had occurred in the midst of a heated argument. Right then, with his arms around me, our bodies touching so intimately, the words took on a completely different meaning.

This time, I wasn't walking away.

I watched the different emotions flood through Troy's eyes, his silence unnerving but understood. He'd never said it before, not to me; he had admitted to being 'confused' about me. But what would he say, what would he do now with this being laid so prominently on the table?

My questions were answered as he sat up straighter, pulling me to him, his lips teasing mine with soft, sweet kisses. There was no rush in his actions as he took his time exploring me, his hands cupping my face as his kisses grew longer. My heart was pounding against my ribcage, my body humming with a newfound energy. One of his hands trailed down, grasping my hip as his other hand moved around, his fingers tangling in my hair, holding me even closer as he deepened our kiss.

My breath was coming in short gasps as he held me to him, exploring me with his lips and tongue, lightly nipping at my neck as he pulled my head back gently by my hair. I couldn't hold back the soft whimpers and moans and he ate it all up, knowing just where to touch to get me closer to the edge. I tried pulling back, tried gaining access to those sensitive spots on his neck, but he wouldn't let go.

He leaned back into the cushions, pulling me with him, his hand on my hip guiding me as our bodies began to move, clothing and all. I wanted closer contact, skin to skin, but I was a slave to Troy's every whim as he held me to him, shrugging off my advances to take things further. I swear it was as if he was trying to torture me on purpose, making me burn for him, giving me just a taste of what I know could come if he would just let it happen.

He dropped his hand from my hair, letting it trail down to cup my breast in his hand…did he just laugh as I whimpered? It was getting to be too much, I didn't know if I could take it any more as his hips surged forward just a little harder…

"Please," I whispered against his lips, and he responded by doing it again. "God, Troy, please," I breathed as he latched onto my neck, lightly biting as he moved against me. I tried reaching in between us to remove the barriers between his skin and mine, but he caught my wrist and pinned it behind me, his lips finding mine once more. I was helpless to his sensual assault as he turned us together, gently laying me back on the couch.

He was lying half on top of me, his hand free to roam as it wished, but with his body pressed so closely to mine I couldn't get to that part of him I wanted to touch so badly. "Please…" I tried begging once more as his hand reached between my legs, moving against me even with my pants in the way. "Troy…don't make me wait…please…"

He was kissing the outer edges of my ear as his hand slowly made its way down the front of my pants, slipping beneath the silk panties, stopping just shy of where I wanted his fingers to be. I could feel him pressed up against me…he wanted this every bit as much as I did…

I grasped his wrist, trying every thing I could, every way I could possibly move, but he held his hand in place as he left another wet trail of kisses down my neck. I moaned in frustration, feeling him smile against my skin as he finally acquiesced my pleas, his fingers moving expertly against me.

My body seemed to go into a complete state of shock at the sensation, wanting it so badly, having it feel so good that I never wanted him to stop. "Breathe, Christine," I heard him whisper in my ear, and I took a deep breath in, a small moan escaping me as his fingers were building me up to a fever pitch.

"Troy, please…please…" I wanted him right then, no more waiting…I wanted him with every fiber of my being, skin to skin, inside of me…

"It's okay," he said, his voice low. He placed light kisses by my ear, and I whimpered, pleading with him again. "Just let go, Christine…let go…" I shook my head slightly, my breathing becoming more and more labored, his fingers drawing a moan from me that Troy captured with a kiss. I grabbed onto his hand, holding him closer as he brought me to that brink that I didn't want to cross without him. He kissed a trail back to my neck, his lips on my skin as he said, "Let me see you fly…it's okay, Christine…I'm here to catch you…"

I cried out, arching my back as wave after wave of ecstasy overtook me, my body tense and trembling while Troy laid beside me drinking it all in. He placed soft kisses on my face, my lips, my neck as his fingers continued playing me until I was finally still, panting and sighing in his arms. When I finally opened my eyes, he was hovering over me, eyeing me like a predator does his prey. "Beautiful," was the only word he said before he kissed me, deep and slow, pulling me up against him.

I don't know how he managed to do it; I don't know if there was some book he had studied or if this was simply a natural talent for him… I was completely at his mercy. Even as we lay there, completely clothed, he had me whimpering, shivering, begging him to make love to me, he was in complete control. It wasn't as if it didn't cost him, I could tell by the sheen of sweat on his forehead, the moisture on his skin when I finally pried his shirt off of him a good hour later. He let out a low growl when I kissed his neck, the taste of his skin driving my desire even more.

"I didn't bring you…here to do this…" Two hours into our friendly platonic night, we were finally skin to skin lying in the middle of his queen-sized bed, pillows tossed about. He pushed my damp curls off my forehead, placing sweet, soft kisses where they had been. I moved my hips against him, wanting him inside of me, whimpering when he shook his head 'no'. His breathing was heavy, labored as in spite of his words he continued kissing me, pressing up against me without entering.

"If this…isn't what…you intended," I managed to say, "then why…"

"Because I want to," he moaned, pulling me closer…so close that one slight movement of his hips and he'd be entering me… I took advantage of his admission, rolling us over as one, gasping as he filled me completely. He arched his neck and back, grabbing onto my hips as I began to move. "Gabriella…Christine…"

"Do you want me to stop?" I breathed into his ear, sure I wouldn't have been able to if he'd said yes. He rolled me over onto my back, pushing further and further into me in response, and I clung to him as I was lost again.

"I…missed you…God, I missed you," he moaned, kissing me, that one sweet declaration sending me soaring once more. This time, he was with me, his hands grasping me so tight I knew there would be bruises.

As we slowly became aware of our surroundings, our breathing returning to normal, he propped himself up on one elbow and smiled down at me. I'll never forget that smile…it wasn't cocky, it wasn't triumphant. It was full of emotion, one that he hadn't stated, one I couldn't be completely sure of. As he gently pushed my curls back again, his fingers lingering on my skin, I thought to myself he has to care about me. There's no way I could be just a fling…not when he touched me as if I were the most precious gift in this world.

I returned his smile, kissing his fingertips as they passed by my lips, praying whatever Jessica had to say wouldn't change his mind.


	36. Chapter 36

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX**

"I think I have everything," I was saying as I stepped out of the washroom, freshly showered, blissfully happy the next morning. Troy had already showered before he'd even woke me up and he was sitting on the couch, slight scruff growing in, T-shirt and jeans filled out quite nicely. "Kelsi normally double checks me, but since someone didn't wake me up in time…"

"You were tired," he replied, standing up and walking over to me.

"How very presumptuous of you, sir," I joked, knowing there was no way I could possibly deny it. He flashed that damn cocky smirk at me right before we were so rudely interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Told you time wasn't on our side," he said softly, just a brush of his lips across mine before he walked over and answered the door. Kelsi rushed in, giving Troy a quick one-armed hug before walking quickly to me.

"We have got to hurry, we're going to miss our plane," she said so quickly that if I didn't know better would have sounded like one long word.

"Relax, Kelsi," I said with a lazy smile. "It's all good, we'll make it."

"Oh…God, who are you and what did Troy do with Gabriella?" she asked, then shook her head. "Scratch that, I don't want to hear it."

"Chicken," Troy muttered, laughing when Kelsi flipped him off.

"Oh, you're one to talk," I teased her, and her pink cheeks told me I was right. "Uh huh, you just shut the hell up. I got my things together."

"A…hem…" Troy cleared his throat.

"Troy…got my things together, and now we're ready to go."

"And you have everything?" Kelsi asked. Troy handed my return ticket to me and smiled at his brother's non-girlfriend.

"Now she does," he answered.

"Okay…then…we have to go!" she exclaimed, picking up my bag and placing it on my shoulder.

"Guess it's time," I said to him with a shrug. He leaned in for one last soft, lingering kiss.

"Until later," he whispered against my lips.

"Of course." Kelsi and I were rushing out the door when I remembered that Troy was going to be speaking with Jessica. I turned back and was stopped before I even said a word.

"I'll tell you all about it," he said with a smile, leaning up against his doorframe.

I could only smile in response.

"Are you still angry with me?" Kelsi was asking as we flew over the country.

"Not…exactly?" I replied honestly. "I would say I was more hurt than angry, to be completely honest with you." I shrugged it off…wow, that was so unlike me… "I'll get over it, though. Best of intentions, right?"

"Riiiight," she drew the word out, still looking at me as if I were an alien. "You…realize that's a window seat, right?"

"Mmm hmm," I said, staring dreamily out at the scenery.

"Earth to Ms. Montez." That wasn't Kelsi's voice. I turned to see Dr. John Craig standing by our seats, leaning over slightly. "If you don't mind I would like to speak with you."

I blushed, biting my bottom lip as I looked up at him. My, but he was a hot one. If my heart wasn't so invested I would do more than take a second look, without a doubt. And now…now, he probably would like to throw me off this damn plane.

"You could take my seat in first class, if you wish," he said to Kelsi, whose eyebrows seemed to disappear into her hairline.

"Go ahead," I whispered to her, giggling as she kissed my cheek and walked quickly towards the front of the plane. John settled into her seat, his broad shoulders nearly touching mine. He looked over at me, flashing an easy going smile. "Okay, tell me how much you hate me now."

"I don't," he said, his deep voice soft and inviting. "Ms. Montez, I would like to show you something." He handed me his driver's license, causing me to raise an eyebrow. "See that?" He pointed to his birth date. "Well before yesterday; don't think for one second that I didn't know what you were up to."

I blushed as I handed his license back to him, unsure of what to say next. "I'm…Dr. Craig, I'm so sorry, and embarrassed, and…"

"I have to admit it was pretty damn hot seeing you like that," he said, causing me to blush further. "Not just the dress either. But, I digress…I only had your best interests at heart. Yours and Troy's, no matter how misguided his intentions were. Or mine, for that matter."

"You could have at least told me he wasn't the one engaged to Jessica," I stated, poking him slightly for effect.

"Yes, I could have," he agreed. "However…hear me out, Gabriella." I closed my mouth as he used my first name, his dark chocolate eyes sincere. "He needed to see what he was doing to you. And…honestly, if you had known Jess was engaged to someone else would you have had the same reaction?"

"That's a hypothetical question, of course," I muttered. I pondered his question for a moment, remembering how happy, how perfect they had looked in each other's arms. "If I had walked in and seen…what I did…no, I probably would have had a similar reaction, perhaps not the same…but similar."

"And therein lies the problem," he said, his voice still as soft. "Can you honestly deal with their relationship, as it is? I know dealing with all of the success and the issues with that, such as the paparazzi as you well know now…that has to be difficult enough. But you…" He chose his words carefully before continuing. "You don't strike me as the kind of person that lets their guard down too easily. My perception of you is one who simply doesn't give their heart away, but when you do it's given completely." I looked away briefly, wondering how he could know that much about me. When he touched my arm softly, I looked back into his eyes, his words reaching into my soul. "Can you live with loving someone whose heart may never be completely yours?"

"I'm not sure," I answered honestly, proud of myself for keeping the tears at bay.

"You deserve nothing less," he said, still touching my arm. "Remember that."

One good thing about that damn black dress was not a soul who had seen the video had any clue that it was me. Especially not with me dressed in traveling clothes with my hair down, light makeup, and no entourage. The girls, however, were another story entirely. Once we'd touched down in Albuquerque and were in the cab to go back to my house, Kelsi's phone was ringing.

"What's up?" I asked as she was barely able to get a word in edgewise.

"Well, Ms G… guess it's a good thing you don't work tomorrow," she replied, holding the phone away from her ear. "Taylor and Sharpay are meeting us at your place."

"What ever happened to 'What happens in Vegas?" I asked, my voice almost higher than usual.

"Don't whine; it's unbecoming." Kelsi's words made me blush as I remembered Troy saying the exact thing to me on the phone in what seemed like an entire lifetime ago.

Once back in my apartment, I had my bags discarded along with my shoes and had grabbed a Diet Pepsi for myself, milk for Taylor, and wine for Sharpay and Kelsi. Oh my, had Girls Night ever changed!

"Why are you not drinking?" Taylor asked, pointing an accusatory finger at me.

"No…not like your sitch," I said, shaking my head. "I'm just not quite up to par yet, not after that night at the club."

"We haven't heard from either one of you all weekend!" Sharpay exclaimed. "And then the video, and all the hoopla since…"

"Hoop..la?" I asked, my eyebrow raised, looking between Sharpay and Kelsi, who merely shrugged.

"Everyone's trying to speculate who you are and what your relationship is," Sharpay tried to explain.

"And why you're pissed at him, don't forget that one," Taylor added, and Sharpay agreed. I had to laugh.

"Where the hell do I start?" I asked, wiping tears from my eyes from the laughter.

"Okay, even I have to admit he was being a bit of a dumbass there," Kelsi piped up.

"GAH, just SPILL already!" Taylor said.

"Oh…alright, did you two know what this freak was planning?" I asked, indicating Kelsi.

"Naaaah," Sharpay said.

"Oh, fuck that, I'm not in trouble for this on my own!" Kelsi interrupted. "They both knew! Not…everything I did, but they knew."

"Bitches," I muttered, then took a drink of my Diet Pepsi. "Just for that I'm not telling you anything."

"At least tell us who the fuck Jessica Carter is," Sharpay pleaded. "And why they believe there's this big war over him."

"Excuse me?" I asked, looking over at Kelsi, who shrugged and shook her head.

"There's some big to-do about him taking you upstairs one night, and then today being seen with her," Sharpay began to explain. "I mean, one report is she's marrying someone else, another report says she's left her fiancé for him, another report says that they were all over each other…"

I felt the blood drain from my face with every word. There's no way… no way in hell he would be all over Jessica Fucking Carter just hours after being with me. Wait, he had done that before, hadn't he? No…they were just talking, he told me he would give me all the details when he called me.

I stood and walked over to my laptop, Kelsi behind me saying, "Gabi, don't… don't do it, you know how the fucking paparazzi is. He said he'd tell you, talk to him first."

"I'll talk to him," I said softly, remembering John's words also. "I would just like to not be blindsided first."

"Kelsi's right, they like to spin these things," Taylor added her input. My macbook didn't take long to power up, and I was quickly on the web typing in the dreaded .

"Maybe it was really nothing, right?" Sharpay asked, her voice small as the pictures were splashed all over the front page. "Oh…that's new."

Jessica and Troy, arms around each other… kissing.

"That's such a blurry picture…maybe it's misconstrued, maybe they were just saying goodbye…" Sharpay, the overly optimistic one was saying. "I mean, is he all touchy-feely?"

My jaw was set as I looked over all five pictures they had on their front page, in various stages of hugs, hand-holding, the kiss. Was he touchy-feely? Did I need to tell any of them just how touchy-feely he'd been with me the night before?

"I'm sure this is blown out of proportion," Kelsi was saying as I heard my phone ring.

"Excuse me," I said softly as I turned to get the receiver, knowing damn good and well who it was. The girls were murmuring their respective excuses as they looked at the damning evidence, and I wondered briefly what Troy's excuse would be. Or would he even have one?

"Ello, Not Telling," he said, his tone forcibly light.

"I've already seen the pictures," I cut him off.

"Fuck," he muttered. "Gabi, I just… I was saying goodbye to her."

"Is that all?" I asked. His pause told me volumes. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"I said I was going to tell you everything," he spoke up. "And I'm going to…I just want you to know, to understand…I didn't know. I thought you were…"

"I was what?"

"I thought you were just being cheeky…or catty, if you will."

"What the hell are you talking about?" I demanded.

"When you said she had…"

"…changed her fucking mind," I said through clinched teeth.

"And not that she has, but…"

"She doesn't want you to be with me."

"She didn't say that, Gabi…she said she's…confused, and you know I have been too, and I don't… Damnit." He took in a deep breath.

"After last night you don't know what you should fucking do, just…perfect."

"No, not after last night, after the last… God, how many years now? You don't get it, you still don't get it even after I tried to tell you."

"And apparently you think I don't deserve any better than to be strung along… again." I felt the tears threaten, but my anger kept them in check.

"You're wrong." His voice was so even, so controlled, I wondered how long he'd rehearsed what he was going to say to me.

"No…no, I've been right this whole fucking time."

"Christine…"

"Stop it!" I yelled, not giving a damn that the girls were now paying attention to me. "My name is Gabriella. Just like with Travis, you need to get it right."

"Okay, I'm sorry."

"No, that's the problem with you," I continued, my venom renewed. "You're not sorry; you're so used to things being handed to you, women throwing themselves at you, people bending to your every whim."

"You know better."

"No, what I know is you've expected me to understand that you'd rather be with Jessica…"

"I didn't say that."

"You don't have to." I wiped a tear away, so tired of the drama, so foolish for believing one night could fix anything.

"Gabriella, everything I have said to you has been the truth."

"It's what you're not saying that tells the whole story," I pointed out, and he sighed quietly.

"I have some time off soon…"

"Don't." I couldn't stop the tears that time. "I can't go through this again."

"Gabriella…"

"What is it going to take for you to see?" I asked, pushing Kelsi's hand off as she walked up behind me. "You are just setting yourself up, Troy. And when I'm not there anymore, how soon before Jessica changes her mind? Again."

"Not there…" The words were so soft I barely heard them.

"You have to choose. Yeah, I'm being that girl, Troy, and before you say I have no right, you need to put yourself in my shoes." I took a deep breath, remembering Jessica's words. "I'm not kidding myself, though. I know all about your history, I know I can't compete."

"Stop."

"No…no, I can't," I said, walking up the stairs, away from everyone. "I can't stop because you…damnit, you made me believe, and right now part of me really hates you for it."

"I never made any promises to you."

"Touché," I replied, wiping the tears away. "I just can't keep doing this, I can't stay on your fucking string."

"I don't know what you want from me." His voice was small, I could almost see him with his head bowed, massaging his temple.

"I want what I felt last night bottled up at my disposal whenever I need to feel happy," I said, knowing it probably made no sense to anyone but me. "I want that freedom…to love like it's never going to hurt."

"But it does." I was silent, wondering his meaning, sure he was talking about Jessica.

"Troy, I have to go." I wasn't lying; I couldn't rehash the same conversation with him over and over again.

"Don't say it," he cut me off.

"Those pictures said it for me."

"No…no, they didn't."

"Troy, I…"

"Damnit, give me…time. I'm being honest with you, Gabriella. I need…time. Please." I was silent, unsure of whether I should agree. Could I do that, keep my heart on the line? "You know…the optimist in me, it's gonna take that as a yes, okay?" he continued, and I swear I could hear him sniffle just a little bit. "So, I wanted you to know…that I'm happy that you were here, and…I'm sorry that everything got so fucked up…and…that thing? That thing you want so badly? Yeah, I want it, too. So, until later…okay? Until later." He didn't wait for my reply before hanging up the phone.

I sat in stunned silence before I turned off the receiver, sitting on the edge of my bed when Kelsi peeked her head in.

"Are you okay?" she asked. I peered up at her through my tears.

"I'm…not sure," I answered honestly. "I…don't know…I…"

"Ice cream?" she asked, holding out the pint she'd retrieved from my freezer. I smiled.

"Yeah," I agreed. "That sounds perfect."


	37. Chapter 37

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN**

I woke alone in my bed every morning; it was something I was used to. The days that I hadn't were actually the exception to the rule. I had never been in a live-in relationship with a guy, I hadn't even felt comfortable spending nights away or having guys over when I was all grown up in my own place. Hell, even when Troy and I had spent the night together, normally he'd be up and about before I even opened my eyes, so again with the waking up alone.

Can someone…anyone…please explain to me, then, why all of a sudden after Vegas I felt so damn lonely?

Taylor was more family-focused, not to mention rather sickly, in the weeks that followed. I saw less and less of her, and only spoke to her on the rare occasion that she felt up to it. This wasn't anything new, either; she had been the same way when pregnant with both Moira and Kiera. I did make a mental note to do my best to get over to her house to see her, although I was all about the avoidance.

Sharpay and her boy toy were actually on the verge of a full-fledged relationship, the first I could remember her having in many years. Sharpay plus settling down equaled something amiss in this reality, but I was truly happy for her. She'd promised she'd break away from him for a Girl's Night; I wasn't holding my breath, no matter how much I could use her bubbly enthusiasm.

Kelsi…I guess it's sad to say that Kelsi and I drifted the furthest apart, mostly of my doing. I know that she felt torn since she was still in her non-relationship with Ryan. Regardless of the fact that we had been friends for years, I still didn't want to put her on the spot, nor did I want to hear about how fabulous Troy was doing in his quest to capture some long-lost part of his youth. I was also afraid that if I was in her presence I may just ask how he was, and I certainly didn't want to feel as if I was prying.

Prying…yeah, speaking of prying, I missed my mom more and more every passing day. She wouldn't have necessarily made me feel better, as the prying would grate my nerves beyond all rhyme and reason. But…she asked how I was, and she would give her motherly advice whether I wanted it or not. I wanted to speak to her, pour out my heart to her, cry on her shoulder the way I used to. I often wondered what she would think of my situation, whether or not she would approve of my handling of it.

No…I knew better. She would call me out every time I pushed people away. She would tell me that I was being…oh, what was her word for it? Right, she'd tell me I was being a fool, acting foolish. Gah, I hated that word, mostly because when she would say it to me, she was right which would absolutely piss me right off.

Thing was…I wasn't so sure I was being foolish this time.

Nearly a month had passed since I had seen Troy. It wasn't as if we didn't speak to one another, we just simply didn't…talk anymore. I couldn't bear to hear about Jessica, and there were still simply so many raw emotions attached with nearly everything having to do with him…I avoided many, many subjects. Feelings? Forget it. He knew I loved him, he was confused about me. Dancing? And bring up Body English? No thank you. His brother Ryan? He was dating, or not dating, Kelsi, and I couldn't listen to how happy they were, and how all of them spent time together. My work? Dr. John Craig had talked me into pursuing cardiology, and apparently that was a sore subject for him. So that left us…what? The weather?

It was a gray, misty, melancholy Saturday morning of my actual full weekend off. I found the weather typical, but fitting, as I set about on my day's quest. Stopping off at the store, I picked up my provisions including my gas station cappuccino since even Starbucks brought bad memories for me. How much more pathetic could I get? I could only wonder.

At least the press about me had died down. Ah, yes, a couple of those sweet nurses couldn't wait to give my name out, and after much warning about how it better not interfere with patient care all of us, including me since I had unceremoniously given them a piece of my mind, had been relegated to normal day to day activity. At least it wasn't third shift, or strictly bedpans that I'm sure they weren't going to do to an RN at that point anyhow, but I digress. TMZ kept up on their daily Jess watch, though, and there was no shortage of it much to my chagrin.

Jess back in her hometown.

Jess going shopping.

Jess on the phone… was it with Troy? If so, which one?

Just. Fucking. Shoot me.

I pulled into the nearest parking space, knowing it was still a little walk to my destination. I had my book, my coffee, my keys, and my cell phone; all the essentials of a single, lonely girl, I suppose, but if that was my destiny then so be it. Ugh, I really dislike feeling sorry for myself; it's even more unbecoming than whining.

I walked over the hill, smiling at the familiar site before me up by the large oak tree. The path was familiar to me and becoming more worn as the days turned into weeks. I stopped just short of my usual perch and placed a kiss on the headstone.

"Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad," I said, sitting Indian-style beside their grave with my book and coffee. "The weather absolutely sucks today, you mind sending some sun?" I looked upwards at the clouds, the gray sky completely matching my mood. "Nah, on second thought, this is perfect. You know…I'm not much into this book today, though. Today…well, today I want to tell you about a boy."

I had been thinking back a lot lately, of that hospital in Florida. I could see now how I'd missed putting two and two together. Troy had changed greatly, maturity adding even more to his looks. His voice had even matured, not that he had ever sung to me back then, but his speaking voice had a much richer tone to it. But it was the eyes…the eyes that I couldn't believe I had missed.

"I know that you two already know…well, everything now, but I'd kinda like to share this with you, if you don't mind," I continued, leaning against the stone as if it could comfort me. "See, this boy was…well, he was my comfort in a very dark time for me. I was so angry, so upset all the time. Daddy, you may not have been aware, but Mom…I know you saw it, I know you saw how angry I was, especially with Dad suffering the way he was. I just wanted to run away, completely away, and never come back…" My eyes slid shut at the memory, the pain as real as if it had been just yesterday. "But…one night, in the waiting room, there was this…this boy, and he had the most beautiful eyes. He was just…wow. You know? Wow…" I laughed, remembering how much Mom hated it when I would say that, she'd always chide me to elaborate.

"He was hurting, too," I continued. "And we just connected, through every thing we were both going through." I paused for a moment, remembering what I had…and hadn't…told him. "No, I wasn't completely honest with him, though, but I could talk to him, and he…helped me, so very much, just knowing he was there, listening. Is…this irony? Talking to the two of you about wanting someone to listen?" The leaves rustled in the light breeze and I laughed softly. "Okay, so you're listening, point made." I took a drink of my cappuccino, missing Starbucks but refusing to be reminded of Jessica any further. "Hey…I didn't get to tell you, did I? Mom…that boy…that was Not John. He'd said once…"

Oh…God… He'd said something about it to me… something about reaffirming the theory about being right where you're supposed to be…and what had I said in return? Oh, right, it had completely slipped by me in my tirade over Jessica.

I brushed back a tear before I continued. "He'd said…that…" My voice faltered once more. "Nah, forget it. It's inconsequential anyhow. So…yeah, I guess that's what I miss about him the most. Talking to him, because I…could. Does that make sense?" I sat in silence for a moment, taking sips of my cappuccino and looking out at the gardens. "Daddy picked the perfect spot for the two of you…" I was interrupted by my phone buzzing in my pocket and I sat up straighter to retrieve it. I glanced at the number, then over at their headstone. "Show offs," I whispered before I answered.

"I'm glad you called," was the first thing I said.

"Really?" Troy sounded pleasantly surprised, although a bit tired. "So…then you don't mind that I have?"

"No…I was just thinking about you." I wondered if he could tell that I had been crying, but then decided I really didn't care.

"I'd be flattered if you didn't sound so sad."

"I was…reminiscing," I told him.

"Ah…"

"About the hospital, in Florida."

"Oh." He sounded slightly surprised, as we never really discussed it.

"Yeah, I'm just sitting here in the Gardens and…I wanted to apologize to you, explain a little of what was going on."

"I was going to say you don't owe me an explanation, but I'm afraid if I do that then you will go back to not talking to me."

"I'd be flattered if you didn't sound so sad," I tried to joke, knowing this was no laughing matter. I could hear his light breathing in the background so I knew he was still on the line regardless of the fact that he had said nothing in return. "I suppose it would be pointless to tell you how messed up I was; that was pretty evident…but…I wasn't honest with you when I told you why I was there."

"I…kinda gathered that, yeah."

"My Dad…" I choked back a sob at the memory of him lying there, gasping for every breath he took. "My Dad had been sick for a very, very long time, as long as I could remember. He'd said so many times he was ready to go, and as much as that selfish part of me wanted him around, seeing him like that…it hurt, it hurt beyond…well, beyond the telling of it.

"Others in my family," I continued, "they kept pushing these treatments, even when he wasn't able to speak for himself any…more." I took a deep shuddering breath to try to steady myself.

"Gabi, you don't have to…"

"No, it's okay, I want to," I cut him off. "I do, because it's been eating me up inside. I was so…so very angry, I kept saying to myself that it shouldn't be Dad in that bed it should be Her, for keeping him alive when it hurt so much for him. So, see…when I told you…I said it was my mom, and it was mean and spiteful and wrong and…"

"You were a Daddy's girl then?" It was actually more a statement then a question.

"Oh God, yes, he spoiled me fucking rotten," I said with a laugh. "He was always so kind, so loving. He knew…he knew he didn't have forever, and he tried to cram forever in the few short years we had." We were both silent, each knowing exactly what that felt like. "And… then, I was dishonest with you, not that it's exactly something new considering what else I've done…"

"Gabi, don't…it's so…inconsequential now…what?" he asked as I started laughing.

"Get out of my head," I giggled through my tears. "And it does matter, it matters to me, and the guilt has been eating away at me."

"Not to sound philosophical, or like some damn shrink, but I understand…I think if I were in your shoes, I could have easily done the same thing. And don't think I'm just saying that to you."

"No, you wouldn't," I admitted, taking a deep breath. "But that night…at the restaurant…" I stopped, closing my eyes to the myriad of emotions trying to consume me. "That night that I interrupted your anniversary dinner with…" It was so hard to even say her name. "…with Jess, the phone call? The one I wouldn't tell you about?"

"Yeah, I remember that."

"That was Lisa, my sister. Dad had… um, he…"

"Gabi, I'm so sorry…God, I was there, I was right there and…"

"What was I supposed to say? Gee, Troy, thank you so much for being there for me, but I lied out my ass to you? Oh, and yeah…I got the lecture from Lisa about how I was out whoring around…I just didn't want to feel anymore, I didn't want to hurt anymore. And…there you were." I almost added 'with Jessica,' but I refrained from doing so.

"The timing sucked," he stated honestly.

"So did my behavior," I added. "And I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize to me, Gabriella, not over that."

"Yes I do, over that and so much more."

"If anyone should be apologizing here, it's me." His voice was soft, a slight waver to it. As per the usual, I heard a bustling in the background.

"Ah, duty calls," I said, and he sighed.

"Yeah, I just got back."

"Did you enjoy your time off?" I asked, praying I wouldn't hear about all the time he'd spent with her.

"No."

I wasn't expecting that.

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said, my brow furrowed. Lately he'd learned to enjoy his time off, catch up with people he'd missed, spend time with his family…

"There was somewhere I wanted to be but was told emphatically no."

Where did he….oh…right.

He'd initially said he wanted to spend his time off with me.

"Say you did," I spoke up suddenly. "What then, Troy? What…then?"

"I don't know," he answered honestly.

"Then we're at an impasse."

"Again," he added with a laugh. I heard Jackie in the background barking orders at someone, and Troy sighed, swearing slightly under his breath. "Hold on," he said to me before I heard him cover the mouthpiece and ask for just another minute, which was denied.

"It's okay," I said to him.

"No, it's not," he replied, frustrated. "I haven't talked to you in…God, in forever…"

"We spoke a couple days ago," I corrected him.

"But we didn't…talk."

"We'll talk later," I said.

"Will we really? Or will it be niceties and formalities all over again?"

"What do you want from me, Troy?"

"I just…miss you….I miss you."

We both fell silent, remembering the last time words similar to that had been spoken between us.

"I just miss you," he repeated, and I choked back a tiny sob. "Gabi?"

What could I say? What should I say? How could I be any clearer than what I'd already said?

A small ray of sunshine peaked around the clouds, settling in by the tree, removing any doubt from my mind as I finally answered him.

"I miss you, too."


	38. Chapter 38

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT**

Two thirty five rolled around and I'll be damned if my phone wasn't ringing. Okay, so I realize he said he'd call, but were we really reverting back to the old ways? I grumbled for only a moment before answering the phone.

"Listen, Not John…if you're gonna be calling me at this ungodly hour all over again, it would be nice for a liiiiitle bit of warning, 'kay?"

"Well, alrighty then," he quipped back. "Hey, Not Telling…remember when you said I could call whenever I pleased? Well…I…um, please. There's your damn warning." I could feel the smile before it ever crossed my face.

"Alright, Smart Ass, what are you up to?" I asked.

"Six foot…even? Maybe? I dunno, I haven't measured myself in awhile. Oh, and Jackie says hello."

"Hello to Jackie," I replied after the obligatory roll of my eyes at his attempt at humor.

"Hey…Jackie! Not Telling Christine says hello!" I heard him call out. What…he wasn't alone? And he was calling me?

"It's about damned time," I heard Jackie's voice in the background, and Troy laughed softly.

"Apparently I've been getting on everyone's last nerve," he explained to me.

"You just got back! How could you be on everyone's nerves already?"

"Nah, this has been going on for awhile," he said. "Close to… a month, actually."

A month? Ever since… Vegas? But…what about Jessica, wasn't he trying to work things out with her? Isn't that what all the tabloids were talking about?

"You're pretty much biting the hands that are feeding, clothing, and driving you, so my suggestion would be to chill the fuck out," I teased, having missed our conversations so much I'd do whatever it took to keep this one going. "And if I hear about you giving Alfred…er, Jackie a hard time after he took such good care of me, you're going to answer to me, and it won't be pretty."

"Hey, Jackie…bite my lily white ass!" he called out with a genuine laugh.

"You're just testing my patience tonight, aren't you?"

"Whatever it takes," he said softly, and my heart did a nosedive to my feet. "Sooooo," he drew the word out, a playful lift in his voice, "what's my punishment?"

"I'm gonna drag your ass back here,"

"Uh huh, okay."

"Up to my bedroom,"

"Iiiinteresting, interesting. Go on," he prodded.

"Tie you up,"

"Really, now?"

"And make you…"

"What?" he asked.

"Listen to Starship's 'We Built This City' until your ears bleed."

"Aaaahhh, bullshit, cause you'd have to hear it too."

"With headphones on," I added.

"I'll just sing it at the top of my lungs."

"Fine, I'll make it the Spice Girls then."

"What, 'If You Wanna Be My Lover'? I can sing that one too, sweetheart. Try again."

"Hanson's 'MmmBop', over and over and over…"

"Well, now there's a snappy, catchy little tune. You'd get to hear my falsetto for hours, and it would drive…you…crazy."

"Well, fine!" I finally caved, laughing more than I had in weeks. "Then I'll just…stop speaking to you altogether. There, that will be your punishment."

"That's not funny," he said, his voice soft and low now, the sudden change almost tangible.

"It wasn't meant to be, hence the whole punishment thing," I tried to re-lighten the mood.

"Gabi," his tone was serious when he spoke now, "I didn't mean to hurt you…I never, ever set out to intentionally hurt you. You know that, right?"

"I never thought it to be intentional," I admitted, my heart hammering in my chest. "You don't strike me as the type, and if you had I wouldn't be in this predicament."

"What predicament is that?" he asked, and I sighed.

"This…holding pattern," I said, hardly believing I was confessing this to him. "This going through hell every time I hear your voice because I can't say what I want to."

"Who says you can't?"

"I do," I replied. "My heart can only take so much." Gah, was I really saying this to him? No alcohol, no prodding, no argument even?

"I hear ya, I hear ya." And what was this, he was agreeing with me? "I dunno…it's like…once you've been hurt, and I'm saying you as in a collective being…yeah, once you've been hurt, it's just an automatic response to kinda just shut down."

"Defense mechanism, I suppose," I added.

"Yeah…um…you know, I didn't mean to wait so long to call you and apologize. After Phoenix, I mean."

"Oh, bullshit, you didn't call until after Ryan told you that I really didn't get my messages," I said, a soft smile on my face and in my voice.

"True, true…but…well, it's that defense thing." I could almost see him shrug. "Which is in its own merit a bit hypocritical I suppose, because I could have handled the situation much differently…I should have handled it differently. There, let me put it that way. Hell, I may have still gotten lucky, who knows?" I couldn't help but laugh at his comment. "What? A guy can dream, right?"

"That ball was in your court the whole time," I said with a laugh. "I was already a goner."

"So was I, if you recall my message your absentminded ass couldn't get to. Hey, did you ever figure out your code?" I laughed again in spite of the tears coming to the surface. This was why I didn't want to talk to him about feelings, our past…any of it…this was why.

"No, and no more teasing me about it, you've put me through enough hell over that damn code as it is." He laughed with me then, and the nostalgia over the ease of our conversation was hitting me straight in my heart. I wondered if it was having the same effect on him.

"Well, alright…Not Telling Christine Gabriella Elizabeth, I won't tease you at all. Ever again. Scouts honor."

"At least you got all my names right."

"You have to give me credit on that one," he pointed out. "Brownie points of some sort?"

"Depends," I said.

"On what?"

"On what you plan to cash them in on," I answered, my cheeks starting to ache from smiling. Had it been that long since I'd smiled so much?

"Well…give me time and I can get real creative."

"Listen to you! All you ask for is time, you fucker!"

"Tsk tsk, such a potty mouth Ms. Montez." Even with his words, we were back to reality.

"And what's my punishment?"

"I'd say I'd never talk to you again, but I'd be lying. I can't do it, I honestly can't. And not just because everyone was giving me hell about my mood either," he added.

"So you called for your fix?" There was no double meaning intended with my words, but it left us both speechless for just a moment, remembering how he had initially planned his trip to Vegas to "fix things" with me. This also brought back my reaction to his confession, my admission that I love him…the night we shared afterwards…

"Troy?" I asked.

"That really is why I went to Vegas…no, not for sex…you know, when I told you I went out there to fix things, I meant it."

"What happened?" I asked, damning myself as soon as the words left me. I didn't want to hear it, I couldn't stand hearing it, hadn't my heart suffered enough?

He sighed then, deep and long, and I heard him crack open what sounded like a bottle of beer. "Travis…Troy, Troy Burke…he was speaking at that seminar that you were going to. I'd said in passing I was going to be in that weekend, and he got this wild hair up his ass to plan a huge engagement party." I was silent as I listened to him finally tell me everything he should have said weeks ago.

"Jess wanted me there, and I didn't want to say no. It wasn't…Gabi, I didn't go there to pull any shit, I wasn't there to try to stop her from marrying him, that wasn't my intention. I mean, when she met me in Albuquerque, and she was so…so happy…okay, that bothered me. It did at first, but she was happy and I told her that would make me happy for her. You know…she could tell something was different with me too. And I told her." He paused, taking a drink and sighing.

"I told her…about you," he continued, and then laughed softly. "She was so…pissed at me, Gabi, so fucking pissed. She couldn't believe I was with you…I mean, not with…God, I'm going to end up putting my damn foot back in my mouth, fuck."

"I know I was wrong to not tell you," he said then after taking another drink. "And I've paid for it every fucking day, but…I don't know, Gabriella, it's like being between a rock and a hard place, my past and…and…you." His breathing wasn't as steady as before, and I'm sure mine wasn't either.

"But I'm not answering the question, am I? Because you sort of already knew this part, or bits of it." His voice was beginning to waver and I heard him clear his throat. "I told you that I was going to talk to her, because she'd asked me to. I didn't go in there thinking for one second that I was going to get blindsided like that…" For someone who'd spent a good deal of time reminiscing and longing for his first true love, 'blindsided' wasn't a word that seemed to fit to me.

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

"John told you I was looking for her, and I had been. I had been, and I'm not going to lie to you about it, but…I found you. No, don't think like that, not a replacement…not a fucking replacement… I'm just…again, putting my foot in my mouth, so let me get back to what I was saying, okay?"

I buried my face in my hands waiting to hear all about Jess's undying love for him and how he felt the same, cursing myself for allowing this distance between us by being dishonest with him back in Phoenix. I was shaking, curled up in a ball, wishing even though he was breaking my heart that he would be there to help pick up the pieces.

"She said…" he continued, taking a deep breath, "she said that seeing you, knowing it was you…hurt her, because she couldn't stand to think of…us. And she said she couldn't… couldn't move on until she knew why."

"And that's all it took," I couldn't help but snap.

"No," he admitted quietly. Oh…oh, here's where he's going to tell me… "We talked, Gabi. About… things, about our breakup, about all the time we hadn't seen each other, about…what we'd meant to each other…"

"Stop…please, just stop," I begged through my tears. "This is why I couldn't… why I didn't want to really talk with you… "

"I just need you to understand,"

"What, that you called me to tell me you're still so in love with your ex? To tell me how your perfect past…let's face it, Troy, it couldn't have been that perfect or it wouldn't be a past… "

"Easy with the temper, Christine," he said, his voice low, emotions high. "And please don't put words in my mouth. It's not cut and dry, it's not easy, it's not…" He stopped for a moment, and I could hear his breathing on the other line. "Gabi," I heard him say, almost in a pleading voice, "I swear with everything in me I never meant to hurt you."

"Ah, don't sweat it, Bolton," I said with a harsh laugh. "You only hurt the one you love."

"Is that so?" It was more of a statement.

"What exactly is it that's not so cut and dry, huh Troy?"

"You."

Oh…OH.

Me.

"I'm fine, don't worry about me." It was an automatic response, not bitter or angry in any way.

"Gabi…what about… John?"

I took in a deep breath. "Revenge? Spite? A means to get into that party and see for myself what you wouldn't tell me. Was it right? No. I'm not proud of it either."

"No…not then, you'd already told me about that…" His voice trailed off. "Gabriella, is there… are you…seeing him?"

"Is that why you called?" I asked without thinking. "Wait, I'm sorry…that was just… No. The answer is no." Did I just hear him exhale?

"It's not…why I called, no," Troy continued. "I just…I couldn't help but think maybe he was the reason you wouldn't talk to me, and it…hurt."

"Aren't you just a mess of contradictions?" I asked.

"At the very least," he said softly.

"I can't wait forever, Troy." As much as my heart shattered at that confession, I knew it was the truth.

"I know." Again with the melancholy. Why had we even strayed into this territory, knowing the outcome would put a damper on our mood? "I don't have the right to ask you to wait, Gabi, I know I don't."

"You're right, you don't," I said, wiping away a tear.

"Is this why you don't want to see me?"

"No…I think it's best that we don't…"

"Why?" Did he really have to sound so close to tears?

"Because…" I took in a deep breath before finishing. "Because I love you, that's why. And I couldn't be in the same room without reducing myself to some sobbing, babbling idiot telling you that you shouldn't walk away from your future for your past. Because…I'd look into those eyes and I'd beg you to stay, and when you didn't I'd be broken. Even more so than I am now."

"Gabi, I don't know what to…" God, he was crying. No, no, no…I couldn't deal with it right now. "You'd say all that, huh?"

"Yes, damnit, and I could just…kick your ass over doing this to me." We both laughed then, breaking just a little of the tension.

"You're not going to hang up on me, are you?" he asked.

"Not yet," I replied.

"You'll stay on the phone then, until it's time for you to go?"

"Just like I used to," I said.

"Good."

And I did.


	39. Chapter 39

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE**

Thursday in the hospital was rather quiet. I took it as a good sign, catching up on paperwork and charts. I was sitting at the table behind the front desk double checking my work when I felt a strong arm on my shoulder. I glanced to my left shoulder where a tanned, strong hand set, then back behind me to my right was Dr. John Craig knelt down beside me.

"Ms. Montez," he said smoothly, "I have a request of you."

"Do you now," I replied, raising an eyebrow at him until he removed his hand.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "There are a few orders that haven't gone through and while I normally have Pat or Karen check up on them, I thought you wouldn't mind doing it for me."

"It's wonderful that you're so involved, Dr. Craig, but I hardly think your head nurse or her right hand would appreciate you handing something directly to me."

"My, aren't you all about professionalism today?" he asked, grinning like a schoolboy. "Tell you what, join me at lunch in a half hour and tell me all about it, and in the meantime…" He handed a folder to me. "Mr. Lawson down the hall will be the one you need to speak with about it. And Ms. Montez?"

"Yes?" I asked, half tempted to tell him we shouldn't go to lunch, but deciding I should be completely open with him.

"Be sure to wear your name tag when you're in Mr. Lawson's office." He laughed at my expression before standing up. "Meet me in the car port in a half hour."

"Aren't you going to the cafeteria?" I asked, and he shook his head 'no.' "You'll have me back in an hour?"

"Scout's honor," he said softly with a wink, then he turned and walked away. I shook my head briefly and set my charts aside, making sure my name tag was visible and right where it should be.

I knocked briefly on the doorframe as I peeked my head inside the cluttered office. Mr. Lawson was sitting behind the overly large, overly stacked with paperwork desk going through one of the half million folders that were strewn about. "Mr. Lawson?" I said, attempting to get his attention. He lifted the folder slightly so that only the top of his gray hair was showing. Oh, great, he was grumpy today; this is why the task of dealing with him always fell on Pat or Karen. "Mr. Lawson?" I repeated just slightly louder. I was attempting to give him the benefit of the doubt since I knew he was nearly 80 years old. Forgive my political incorrectness for just a moment as I wondered why in the world this man had yet to retire.

"I heard you the first damn time," he grunted, forcefully putting the folder onto the top of the mess on his desk, catching it before it fell to the floor. "What is it you're in here for? I am a busy, busy man."

"I know this, and appreciate it…sir." I made a mental note to kick John when I met him in the carport. "We received a notice from one of our suppliers saying that they hadn't received their check." I handed the notice to him.

"What the hell are you doing with this? This is something I handle."

Obviously not so well.

"Sir, if they don't get the check we don't get our order."

"And how many years of college did it take for you to come up with answer, missy?"

Count to ten, Gabriella. Count. To. Ten.

"I can see the check sitting here, to your left," I said, plastering a sickening sweet smile on my face. "Perhaps you just forgot?"

"Forgot?!" he nearly shouted, and I took a quick step back. "Now damnit, Susan, if I had not sent the check, I'd remember!"

Susan? I looked down, my nametag firmly in place, and back up at him.

"Whatever you say, sir," I replied with a smile, placing the check in front of him, thanking the Lord this man was not a doctor.

Approximately forty minutes later, John and I were seated in a semi-private room at an exclusive club waiting for our drinks to be served when this conversation came back to me. "John?" I said sweetly, batting my eyelashes.

"Yes, Ms. Montez?"

I kicked him swiftly in the shin from underneath the table.

"What was that for?" he asked, laughing as if he already knew.

"First off for Mr. Lawson."

"I don't see what's so wrong with him."

"Do I look like a Susan?" I asked. "Honestly, do I? And…am I not wearing my nametag even?" John's head tilted back as he laughed.

"He's a character, isn't he?"

"Was that some kind of payback?" I asked. "Or is…this your payback?" I motioned around the room that I so did not fit in.

"What's wrong with this? It's one of my favorite places for lunch."

"I'm hardly dressed for something like this," I explained. "And don't even try to play like you didn't talk them into letting me in."

"Well, I didn't have much warning or I would have asked you before and made sure you had time to change." His dark eyes were sparkling with unsaid mischief.

"Much warning about what?" I asked, my answer staring straight at me as Kelsi and Ryan entered the restaurant. Troy hadn't mentioned to me about Ryan being in town, but then again he may not have known. I was expecting perhaps a scowl or indifference from him, so I was unprepared at the smile he sent my way. Kelsi smiled also, a little tight but it was still there, as they motioned to the greeter…maitre d? Hell, I don't know… whomever it was, they let him know they were coming over.

"Have a seat," John motioned to them, standing in true gentleman fashion until Kelsi was seated.

"How have you been?" Kelsi asked me softly as Ryan and John were getting caught up.

"I've been better," I admitted, "but I've been worse, too. And I'm feeling unbelievably out of place here."

"Don't sweat it, those scrubs are cute." She smiled softly, playing with one of my curls, tears brimming in her eyes. "Are you sure you're okay, though? You look beat."

I was beat. Troy and I had spent the past three nights talking for hours on end, and although we were back to avoiding the subject of us it was so wonderful to have my confidante back.

"I'm fine, don't…"

"…worry about you, whatever woman," she cut me off, then gave me a one-armed hug. I leaned my head on her shoulder briefly.

"I've missed you, Kelsi," I said. "Are you still mad at me?"

"Why the hell would I be mad at you?" she asked, sitting back and wiping her eyes quickly.

"I could name all the reasons, but I'm starved and we're pressed for time."

"They'll be back for our orders soon, but you're off the rest of the day," John spoke up, and I looked over at him quickly. "I have some pull around there." I was unsure if I should thank him or be offended at his presumptuousness.

"And you couldn't at least let me change?" I decided to be graceful with others around.

"I know a little black number you look smashing in," he said with a cheeky grin I nearly wanted to slap off his face.

"That's humorous," was all I said in response and turned towards Kelsi. "I probably will go back to work, though; I don't want to intrude on your time."

"It's not intruding." It was Ryan who said this to me, the look in his eyes understanding as if he knew my agitation at the offhanded comment about the dress. "I hear they never caught up with those assholes that put that stuff in your drink."

"No…but it's okay by me, I have had to relive that night enough."

"Or what you remember of it," John joked, winking again at me. Did he really think that was funny?

"Hey, I never really got the chance to thank you," I said, leaning forward so that Ryan could hear me better.

"Nah, don't mention it," Ryan replied. "I'm just glad we got up there in time. Troy would have lost it if anything happened to you." I blinked back sudden, unexpected tears at his comment, the moment brief but poignant.

"So how are Troy and Jess doing?" John asked quickly bringing me crashing into reality.

"Troy's good," Ryan answered, a slight frown upon his face. "Don't know about Jess."

How could he not know about Jess? Was Troy shutting Ryan out the way I had been doing with all of my friends? No…I banished that thought from my mind quickly, smiling at the waitress that brought my Diet Pepsi and took Ryan and Kelsi's drink orders.

Lucky for me, Kelsi kept me occupied for the rest of our time at that restaurant. She had been to see Taylor, who was definitely not having an easy time with this pregnancy. "She's had a lot of spotting, and she's really not supposed to be on her feet much."

"Is this really something we want to discuss while eating, ladies?" John asked with a laugh and it was difficult to hide the rolling of my eyes as I ignored him.

"Why hasn't she asked for any help? Both of us live really close," I said. "I know Moira's older and Chad is there sometimes too, but that doesn't mean they can do it all."

"Yeah, we should get over there some time this weekend," Kelsi agreed. "We could do a…" I know she was going to say we could do a Troy Bolton marathon, like we used to, but given the circumstances it seemed a bit odd.

"Let's not and say we did," I joked, and we both laughed.

"Have you…" She bit her lip, perhaps wondering if she should even ask.

"Seen him? No," I answered her unspoken question. "Talked to him? Hell, he wont shut up."

"That explains…" she stopped, lowering her voice so the guys couldn't hear us over their conversation. "Ryan said he'd been in a fantastic mood this morning. Tired, but fantastic." She smiled wistfully. "I wish there was something I could do, some way I could help."

"There's nothing anyone can do," I said with a shrug. "Not even me. This is all up to him. Or, I hope it's just up to him."

"Gabriella…"

"No, don't," I cut her off. "I'm just not able to handle it, really. I don't want to hear about Jessica, not unless he's going to tell me." She smiled at me at my words.

"Did that really just come from you?" she asked.

"I know…sick, isn't it?" I couldn't help but laugh, which Kelsi quickly joined in with.

"What the hell are you two up to?" Ryan asked.

"Nothing good and pure, I'm sure," John added.

"Listen…we've got some running to do," Ryan said suddenly, and Kelsi smiled at him. Mmm hmmm, running, I'm sure.

"I need to get my car; I left it at the hospital," I said.

"Nonsense, I'll take you home," John spoke up.

"No, I don't like being without my car," I disagreed. "I take it you're not going back to the hospital?"

"We can swing you that way," Kelsi said.

"You don't mind?" I asked, almost relieved to be away from the sudden uncomfortable situation.

"Nah, we don't mind," Ryan answered. "Besides, you two need more time to catch up. And that way…I can drive."

"He likes my car," Kelsi said with a roll of her eyes.

"Gabriella…"

"Thank you for inviting me to come out here," I said quickly to John, whipping out my portion of the bill. "I've missed Kelsi like crazy! So, I'll see you tomorrow at work, right?"

"Right," he said, leaning in and kissing my cheek, ignoring my raised eyebrow. "I'll call you later."

"That was…odd," I commented as we left the restaurant. "Thanks for driving me back; I don't know what's up with him, he's acted so…weird since you two got there."

"He's wanting me to send a full report, I'm sure." Ryan's voice was flat, his annoyance visible. Kelsi had walked ahead to get the car and bring it around and Ryan and I were standing by the front doors.

"There's nothing to report," I said softly, not looking up at him. When he didn't say anything in return, I looked over at him. He was standing next to me, hands in his pockets, a soft smile on his face. "What?" I asked. He didn't answer, he just continued smiling at me, making me self-conscious. "What?" I put a hand up to my hair, checking to see if it was lopsided. "Ryan…what?"

Without warning, he had swept me up in a warm, friendly hug. "Thank you," he said softly. "Just… thank you, Gabi." He stepped back from me, still smiling.

"For what?" I asked.

"For making Troy so fucking happy." I opened my mouth to protest, but he stopped me. "Just…trust me. I knew he was talking to you again, I just…knew."

"I didn't know," I said softly. Ryan reached over and tousled my hair slightly…he was so much like his brother when he did that.

"Trust me."

"Famous last words," I joked as Kelsi pulled up. He motioned for her to get out so that he could drive.

"Are you sure?" she asked. "You don't exactly know your way around."

"Eh, I'll find my way. Or you can help me." He flashed his famous Bolton grin that prompted a roll of her eyes.

I climbed into the back of the car, propped up against the back passenger side to face Ryan. "Are you sure you don't want me or Kelsi to drive?" I asked.

"I'm sure, damn, you're giving me a complex!"

"Just shut up and drive," Kelsi quipped. He pulled away from the curb, following the directions Kelsi had given him. "Oh, Gabi, what do you say about Sunday going over to Taylor's and helping her out?"

"Sounds fantastic. I'm not working on Sunday…I work a mid on Saturday, but Sunday is good. Let me guess, you wont be here Sunday," I said to Ryan.

"Actually I will," he replied. "I was probably going with you to see that shameless hussy."

I remember laughing at his comment right about the time Kelsi was screaming for Ryan to look out, and the world went momentarily black.


	40. Chapter 40

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FORTY**

My ears seemed to be ringing as I jolted awake, sounds of shouting and crying lingering in the air. For a brief moment I had no idea where I was, then looking around… what the hell? I was lying haphazardly across the back seat of Kelsi's car, the lower half of my body covered in broken glass. My head was throbbing so badly that focusing was an issue.

"Gabi…God, Gabi, please help me!" I could hear Kelsi shouting. "I don't know what to do!"

What the hell was she talking about? Didn't know what to do about…what? When I tried to push myself back on the seat, my hands went into a pool of something wet. I lifted them, seeing them stained bright red, and reality began to sink in.

"Is everyone alright?" I heard a man's voice and looked up, vision blurred as I tried to focus on whomever was speaking.

"He's… he's bleeding, and I can't get it to stop," Kelsi said. He…he, who?

Oh…No, no… Ryan.

"Pressure," I managed to say. "Put…pressure on it."

"Ma'am, lie still, the ambulance is on its way," our Good Samaritan was saying. I saw him pull his shirt off and wad it up, leaning in the driver's seat.

"Kelsi?" God, my throat felt dry. Didn't we just have lunch? Right, we were driving back to the hospital.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," she called back to me. "Damnit, Gabi, weren't you wearing your seatbelt?"

Was I? No… no I hadn't been wearing my seatbelt, I had been leaned back against the passenger side of the car. Ryan was wearing his though…I glanced over at the driver's side, which was now bowed in towards us. The impact must have hit right by where Ryan was sitting.

"Where is he bleeding from?" I asked.

"I can't really tell," she replied. "It was just…it's everywhere." I pushed myself back onto the seat, a shooting pain in my side that I ignored as adrenaline started kicking in.

"Sir," I said to our Good Samaritan, my voice suddenly stronger, "where is his bleeding coming from?"

"He has a head wound, but…" The look on his face that I now brought into focus showed his concern. I looked slightly down where he was holding his light blue shirt, now stained red, up against his neck.

"More pressure," I guided him, unable to move enough to reach over myself. I heard the sirens in what seemed to be the distance. "Don't be afraid, push in."

"His phone's in pieces," I heard Kelsi say. "I have to… I have to call Troy before…before this gets out, and Ryan's phone…"

"Use mine," I said, leaning back into the seat as I felt tunnel vision coming on. I remember holding it out to her and closing my eyes for what seemed to be a brief moment.

"Ms. Montez," a voice was calling in the distance. What the fuck was behind my head? And why couldn't I move my arms? "Ms. Montez, can you hear me?"

"Get that fucking light out of my eyes," I muttered, squinting. "Kelsi, what the hell are you doing?"

"Ma'am, my name is Carrie, I am an EMT, and you're on your way to the hospital." Hospital? Right, the accident. Where the hell was Kelsi? And… Ryan???

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"On their way to the hospital, ma'am."

"Don't fucking ma'am me." I didn't mean to be belligerent; I didn't seem to have any control over it. "Are they okay? Is Ryan okay?"

"Ma'am, I need you to calm down."

"No! No, I'm not calming down, I want to know how they are!" Panic was setting in; I could feel the sweat breaking out all over.

"She's in shock," I heard another voice coming from a direction I couldn't turn my head in. "Calm down, your friends are on their way. Is there anyone, next of kin, that we can reach for you?"

"My mom, please call my mom," I said, momentarily forgetting that no one could. I closed my eyes again, fighting a wave of nausea that was threatening, and I welcomed the darkness as it enveloped me once more.

Everything was eerily quiet when I opened my eyes next. Quiet and…white. No, there was blue. And beeping. And…Lisa?

"You can't do that, Gabriella," she said, her voice tight and strained. "You have to be more careful, you know that, above all people…"

"Hi, it's nice to see you, too," I said, my voice oddly scratchy.

"Oh…God." Was that a sob from her? "I mean, I know they said you were going to be okay, but that's what they said about Mom, too." I felt her squeeze my hand, which apparently had something attached to it. I laughed to myself as the next thought that entered my mind was what my oxygen absorption rate was. Could I ever stop being a nurse?

"Where are Kelsi and Ryan?" I asked. "Are they okay?"

"Kelsi's okay," Lisa answered, squeezing my hand so hard it hurt. "I…I don't know about…Ryan? Is that what you said his name was? I know he's still in surgery. Yours wasn't very long at all."

"Mine? My what?"

"Surgery," she said, as if I should already know that. "Ruptured spleen, no complications right now."

"Well, hello there," I heard Sharon's voice before I saw her. "I heard you came back to us today even with the rest of the day off."

"Are you my nurse? Please say yes," I said, holding out my hand to her.

"You're still in recovery, but once you're out of here, yes." She leaned around Lisa to place a motherly kiss on my forehead. "Dr. Craig has ordered everyone to take special care of you."

"Like a cardiologist would have a say so over here," I muttered.

"Dr. Craig was so sweet, so concerned," Lisa commented, almost seeming to push Sharon aside as she placed herself between us. "He even told that…crazy looking…guy that you wouldn't want him anywhere near you."

"Crazy…oh, God, Sharon are the press here?"

"Yeah, baby, but that's not who she's talking about," Sharon replied. "Oh, and…our patient here needs her rest, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave." I saw her raise her eyebrow as Lisa opened her mouth to protest. "I'm only nice when I say it the first time."

"I've called the rest of the family," Lisa said, grabbing her purse. "We'll make sure you get no unwanted visitors."

"Sharon, who was it?" I asked, gladly accepting the glass of water she handed me before starting my vitals.

"Who do you think it was, baby girl?" she asked. "He's just beside himself right now, completely inconsolable."

Troy.

"How's Ryan?" I asked, trying to sit up more.

"Careful, baby, you have a concussion, too. Ryan's still in surgery."

"Sharon…his condition."

"Critical."

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck…I'd been right there, and I couldn't help, and…

"Where's Troy?" I asked.

"Calm down…calm down. Your blood pressure and pulse will spike and I won't be allowed to let him in."

"But you would anyways." She smiled at me.

"Of course I would. He's in a private waiting room. How are you feeling?"

"Sore," I replied, trying to adjust my position and wincing slightly.

"With that concussion I can't give you much, even with your surgery," she said, checking my chart. "You're not even due for anything for another hour."

"I'm fine, don't worry about me." I closed my eyes ignoring the slight buzzing in my ears. It seemed I was losing time because the next thing I remember was a soft kiss to my forehead. "Sharon, please go get Troy," I whispered.

"So she wasn't lying, you really did ask for me." With the monitors hooked up, there was no masking my heart's slight increase in speed. I opened my eyes slightly to see him staring at the machine, concern etched in his features. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"You didn't," I said, my voice sounding similar to our time together in Phoenix. His brow furrowed slightly until I added, "That's just what you do to me."

His beautiful stormy eyes were rimmed red, slightly puffy around them where he had been crying. Even with his attempt to smile at my comment, his eyes were filling with tears again. His hair was even more disheveled and the fingers he ran through it didn't help matters any. He looked as if he was struggling for his words and his eyes slid shut briefly as I reached out and took his hand in mine.

"How's Ryan?" I asked.

"In recovery," he replied, squeezing my hand softly. "Critical but stable…they said the next 24 hours…um…they said…"

"I'm sorry I wasn't any help," I said.

"What are you talking about, Gabi?" His voice was so soft I could barely hear it. "I mean…you were hurt, and you still were telling people what to do. That's what Kelsi said…when she called." He covered his face and stepped away, trying to control himself.

"Troy…"

"God, I was so excited, here it was the middle of the day and you…were calling…me." He sniffed back his tears, wiping his eyes with his sleeve. "And then it felt like my whole fucking world was being taken away from me."

"This is one of the best trauma hospitals in the country, and that's not just because I work here," I tried to console him. "And the ambulance, I remember hearing them…they were quick, they had to be."

"Yeah, they had him stabilized and here in a matter of minutes, that's what they said." Troy was pacing back and forth. "Did he say anything, Gabi?"

"No," I replied. "I was in the back seat, I couldn't even tell if he was awake."

"I guess they hit…right where he was sitting, and…and… the glass…"

"Was it his carotid?" I asked, and he looked over at me, his eyes conveying how frightened he really was.

"They said there was a lot of glass, and it nicked the…yeah, that…what you said. But, they said the surgery was a success, and I just have to wait…" He ran another shaky hand through his hair.

"It's okay if you go back there," I said, and he stopped pacing for a moment to look over at me.

"Do you want me to go?" he asked.

"Don't read anything into that, please… He's your brother, that's what I mean." I reached for his hand again and he timidly approached and placed his hand in mine.

"My mom, she should be here any time," he continued, caressing my hand repeatedly as if he could draw some kind of strength from me. "And.. and…"

"Jessica," I said for him.

"I think John called her, yeah," Troy said, trembling now. I squeezed his hand, my heart breaking, but my mind telling me it was the best thing to do.

"Troy, you should go," I said softly. His eyes darted back to my face, the pain evident.

"Go?" he asked. "I…I thought that you…" His breathing was shallow, uneven when Sharon walked in the room.

"Troy, honey… you can go see your brother now." He looked back at me…was he looking for reassurance? I couldn't tell. His shoulders slumped slightly as he let go of my hand and walked towards the door.

"Let me know how he's doing?" I asked, groggy once more. Why was I so sleepy so soon? He looked back over his shoulder towards me and smiled through his tears. I wished I could go with him, hold his hand like I did all those years ago.

"It's okay," he said, convincing me he could read my mind. He covered his heart with his hand. "I carry you right here…you'll be with me."

I felt my entire body relax at his words. With another soft smile he walked out the door.


	41. Chapter 41

**CHAPTER FOURTY-ONE**

"I'm bored."

It was Sunday afternoon and I was convinced the powers that be were keeping me there to torture me. Kelsi had stopped by to keep me company so I took the opportunity to attempt to sweet talk her into sneaking me out.

"You know," she began, "you probably would have been treated and released if you had worn your seatbelt." She stressed that last word, glancing at me sideways.

"Yeah, yeah…whatever. You could have at least brought me some Starbucks. Watching you drink that is cruel and unusual punishment." She took a long drink of her caramel macchiato and licked her lips. "You…bitch."

"But you still love me," she said with a smile. "Ryan says hello…or, he writes hello. He still won't speak; he claims he sounds like ET on crack."

I held the pillow to my stomach as I laughed, still rather sore. "But he knows the other guy ran the red light, right? He knows the accident wasn't his fault?"

"As soon as he was able to comprehend what was going on, I told him."

"Have the press died off any?" Kelsi shrugged at my question. "What does that mean?"

"It means they're trying to decipher what's going on in here, making up all kinds of stories about Jess coming to your room and making your condition worse."

"I haven't seen her," I said, rolling my eyes at the audacity of the paparazzi. "What, is it a slow news week?"

"Obviously," Kelsi agreed. "But you and Troy?" She left the question hanging out there, and it was my turn to shrug.

"We're…well… I see him; he comes by when he gets the chance."

"Which is pretty much when he's not sleeping or with Ryan," Kelsi said. "Gabi…"

"Please?" I cut her off. "Please don't tell me; I have to hear it from him." She smiled at me then.

"Suit yourself," she said, curling up in her chair. "Oh…ohoh, look, they're playing 'So I Married An Axe Murderer'!" she exclaimed, and I giggled with delight turning the small TV up. I was sipping on my water while she continued teasing me with her Starbucks and junk food that my mean ass nurse Sharon wouldn't let me have. We were a good half an hour into the movie, my side hurting from laughter, when a small knock came on the door.

"Hey," Troy said as he stuck his head inside. "Is this a bad time?"

"Nah, not at all," I said with a giggle. "Come on in, pull up a seat." He walked in slowly, his leather jacket over his left arm, hand hidden, and his guitar in his right hand.

"Ryan was asking for you," he said to Kelsi.

"Asking or writing for me?" she asked.

"No, he's actually talking, his voice is starting to come around." Troy couldn't suppress his grin. "He still sounds like shit, though."

"I'll be sure to tell him you said so." Kelsi gathered her provisions and then turned to me. "You don't mind?"

"Hell no," I replied. "Tell him I said hello."

"Will do." She gave both of us a quick hug before scurrying out of the room.

"What are you hiding?" I asked Troy, who had turned towards me with a devilish grin. He sat his guitar down and pulled his arm out from under his jacket revealing the holy grail…a caramel macchiato with whipped cream, double shot, just calling my name. "Thank you!" I exclaimed, reaching for it. He pulled it back out of my reach, his grin widening.

"Nah, it's not that easy for you."

"What do you mean, not that easy? I've suffered enough, haven't I?" He leaned in, his eyes a brilliant blue, his grin so sweet as he lightly bit his bottom lip.

"Say it." It was a bit of a command, and I felt a blush creep across my cheeks.

"Over a cup of coffee?" I protested.

"Not just…a cup of coffee." He held it further away from me, never losing eye contact. "This will put you in absolute…" he kissed my forehead… "Complete…" He kissed the tip of my nose… "Ecstacy." He wiggled is eyebrows up and down before planting a soft kiss on my lips. "Say it."

"But it will sound so…"

"Not when you say it," he whispered, his eyes full of so much joy my heart felt it would burst. "Never when you say it."

"Troy…"

"Okay," he said with a shrug and a grin, stepping away from me and sitting in the chair Kelsi had occupied. "Suit yourself."

"Troy!" I pouted.

"Don't whine; it's unbecoming," he said, leaning back in the chair and crossing his legs. "You gotta say it."

"Why?"

"Because…" he uncrossed his legs and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, that cup in his right hand beckoning me, his eyes piercing into my soul. "Because I want to hear you say it. Because it does all kinds of things to me…things I can't even begin to describe, nor would I in these settings. Because… you mean it."

"Yes I do," I agreed with him.

"Say it."

"I love you."

His smile could have lit up the entire hospital.

"Of course you do," he replied, holding the coffee out to me. I hesitated a moment before taking it, lost in his gaze. "Christine, don't you want it?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah." I took the cup from him, our fingers brushing against each other briefly. He sat back watching my face intently as I took my first sip of my favorite beverage in what seemed to be ages.

"So what's the guitar for? You gonna bribe the nurses for me to get me out of here?" I asked with a laugh.

Troy looked at me with a serious expression. "No, actually, I wanted to sing you a song that I wrote…for you," he said as he looked at me.

"Ok…" I said, unsure of where this would go.

Troy picked up his guitar and began to lightly play a tune, then he began singing softly, looking me directly in the eyes.

_Oh I had a lot to say was thinking on my time away  
I missed you and things weren't the same_

Cause everything inside it never comes out right  
And when I see you cry it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you  
And I know I can't take it back  
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round  
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry

This time I think I'm to blame it's harder to get through the days  
You get older and blame turns to shame

Cause everything inside it never comes out right  
And when I see you cry it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you  
And I know I can't take it back  
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round  
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry

Every single day I think about how we came all this way  
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried it's never too late to make it right  
Oh yeah sorry!

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you  
And I know I can't take it back  
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round  
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry

While Troy sang, I sat there watching him intently, tears springing to my eyes. I listened to all of the words he had put into the song, realizing just how real they were and how much they described everything we had been though.

When he was finished singing, he sat his guitar down and scooted his chair closer to the bed, taking my hand in his. He sat there for a few minutes, just looking me in the eye, not saying a word.

Finally, he spoke as he wiped the tears from my face. "You know, all of that is the honest truth. I'm so sorry for hurting you the way I have. I have said things that I shouldn't have. But it's in the past and we just have to leave it there." He sat there rubbing my hand with his, tears threatening to spill from his eyes. "I miss you so much when I can't be with you. Even hearing your voice isn't enough. And I hate seeing you cry…it breaks my heart to see you so broken, especially when I know it's my fault that you are crying. But you have no idea what you do to me. I love having you in my life, and I wouldn't want it any other way…" He trailed off and we just sat there in silence, letting everything sink in. 

I was the first to speak up as I lifted his and hand to my mouth and placed a soft kiss there. "You know, it's going to take me a while to completely forgive you for everything. But I do love you and I wouldn't trade having you in my life for anything. I miss you when you have to be away…but that's why we have to treasure what time we do have together."

Troy nodded and smiled, wiping tears from his face. "Agreed," he said softly. We smiled in unison, enjoying each others company for the rest of the afternoon.

Monday morning came the good and bad news. First the good: I was getting released. Second, the bad: I had to go stay with my sister Lisa.

"Oh, come on!" I protested. "You've got to be kidding me!"

"She has agreed to look after you for another couple of weeks before I feel okay with you maneuvering any stairs." Dr. Roberts, the resident who was caring for me, was looking over my chart.

"I think I can handle a few stairs; besides it's been what…four days already?"

"If you disagree, I will keep you here."

"You're doing this on purpose."

"I'm not going to argue with you about this, Ms. Montez," Dr. Roberts said.

"But…"

"If Dr. Craig had his say so, you'd be here until he could escort you home personally," Dr. Roberts cut me off. "Is that what you'd like?"

"No." I crossed my arms in front of me.

"It's only two weeks," Troy's voice startled me. "Sorry; I was eavesdropping."

"But…it's…Lisa."

"She's family," he pointed out.

"But…Lisa."

"Gabi," he said softly, sitting on the bed beside me, "she's family."

"But…"

"I'll rescue you as soon as I can, I promise." I blinked a couple of times, momentarily stunned.

"So, I'll have your release papers drawn up, and your nurse will come by with instructions." I glanced back at Dr. Roberts who had to feel like a third wheel by this point.

"It's Sharon's day off, isn't it?" I asked him, and he nodded. "I bet you anything she was behind me having to stay so long."

"I think you know better," Troy scolded me.

"Aren't you supposed to be on my side?"

"Always, but you should have had your damn…"

"…seatbelt on. Whatever. So, how soon am I sprung? Or do I have to wait for Lisa to get here?"

"I could drive you," Troy suggested.

"You would?" I asked softly, and he smiled.

"Your nurse should be by shortly," Dr. Roberts said just before he left the room. I was still looking at Troy, questions forming in my mind that I was all too afraid to ask.

"Let's get all your stuff together," he said with that easygoing grin. I smiled and grabbed my clothes that Kelsi had brought to me.

"First things first," I said, walking to the washroom to change.

"You really don't have much here," Troy said, looking around. "About how long before your nurse comes?"

"Don't remember," I muttered, flipping through and making sure I had everything I needed.

"I need to tell them where I'm going, just in case," he said, stopping to drop a sweet kiss on my cheek. "I'll be right back, okay?"

"Of course," I replied, blushing just from his touch. "I'll be waiting." After he left, I went into the washroom and changed into a very loose pair of yoga pants and a large sweat shirt, praising all that was holy for real clothes. It was a bit of a struggle to get my socks on, but I gritted my teeth and dealt with it, not allowing them any more reason to keep me in the hospital. My hair was already pinned up loosely and my make up, although light, kept me from looking like the walking dead. I had refused to lie around looking my absolute worst; I had always been that way. Perhaps it was some sort of sickness, but then so be it. It was just the way of…me.

I stepped out of the washroom, my hospital gown on my arm as I looked for a place to set it. I heard someone behind me clearing their throat and I slowly turned around. The last thing I expected to see was Jessica Carter sitting in the chair beside my unoccupied bed. She was in a nice fitting pair of jeans, her hair in a messy bun, a light jacket folded around her to ward off the chill in the room. She looked…well, she looked approachable, which was also one of the last things I expected.

"Troy isn't in here," I said, breaking the uneasy silence.

"I know; I saw him just a little bit ago." Her voice was soft, no bitterness present. "He said he was going to get his rental car, something about you being released."

"Okay," I said, confused but not wanting to be rude. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"I'm not sure," she admitted, running a hand through her hair. No ring was present.

Oh…hell. No ring. So it was true; her engagement had been called off.

"Gabriella," she began, tilting her head just to the side, "I believe you and I should talk."

The song was "Sorry" by Buckcherry. I do not own….


	42. Chapter 42

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FORTY-TWO**

"Hate is such a strong word." This is how Jess decided to start our little conversation. "I think I'll stick with dislike then, since I honestly don't know you."

Okay, so I have to give her points for honesty.

"Fair enough," I replied. "And just for the record, it is mutual."

"And that's fair as well." She sighed softly, glancing over her shoulder at the door.

"I'm not concerned with Troy hearing what I have to say," I told her, just in case that's who she was looking for.

"Good," she replied. "I like hearing that." She paused again, as if searching for words. "Gabi… this… dislike I have for you, it stems from many, many years ago. Some of it was warranted…"

"Like when I interrupted your anniversary dinner," I finished for her as her words trailed off. She squared her shoulders then and looked me in the eye.

"Yes," she agreed. "However…back in the hospital… You know, Troy never really spoke about you. Ever. I found out you existed because I walked in on the two of you."

"You weren't an item at the time," I reminded her.

"No, we weren't," she said. "But I loved him even then. He was my best friend, and all of a sudden he had you. He talked to you. He poured his heart out…to you. And I really hate…disliked you for that."

"That wasn't in my control," I said with a shrug. "And I didn't really know about you until after I saw you. Afterwards he told me you were his closest friend, but not much more."

"And all he would tell me about you was he was completely honest with you," Jess continued, her head held high. If she was in any way upset now she was a master at hiding it. "And I didn't find that out until I made him tell me why you weren't in the journal."

I opened my mouth to say something in return, but stopped as her words registered. "I'm sorry… what did you say?"

"Troy's a very proud man, Gabi," Jess continued, her voice even stronger. "He owns up to mistakes, and stands his ground when he feels he's right. And he's quite adamant that he has been right…always been right… about you."

That could be taken in more than one way, I thought to myself. I had made my fair share of mistakes from day one, and I paid the price many times over. I couldn't exactly sit there and ask what all Troy had said to Jessica about me; that would be admitting that he wasn't exactly telling me. I felt the anxiety burning in me.

"Gabi,"

"I feel," I cut her off, "that your reasoning for wanting Troy back wasn't necessarily because you wanted him to be with you; you just didn't want him to be with me. You were happy and content to marry someone else until you saw me, recognized me…"

"Had the past thrown in my face?"

"I'd be lying if I said that wasn't the point I was trying to make," I said, holding my head high as well.

"And you made your point well." She paused to take a deep breath again. "Troy explained to me…many things, actually. I do want to apologize for bringing your mother into our last argument, Gabriella, that was completely unfair for me to do." Her eyes were earnest, perhaps a bit of pain behind them as if she knew the heartache of losing someone.

"Apology accepted," I said softly.

"I understand it was your…father? He was the one in the hospital in Florida?"

"Please, I really…don't want to talk about it," I replied, unsure if I could handle the emotional toll it would place on me to discuss this with someone I didn't even know.

"Okay," she said, then bit her bottom lip slightly. "Troy told me that my perception of you was completely distorted. He told me that the girl in the hospital…and the girl in the restaurant… that what I saw wasn't an accurate depiction of the real you." She shrugged slightly as my mind raced…why was Troy saying these things to her? And why was it that he talked so freely with her about me, and had yet to really talk to me about what was going on with the two of them? "Please try to understand when I tell you that I… well, I still have my doubts."

"Why would it possibly matter, Jessica?"

"Because…because ever since I saw him with you, that night in the hospital… God, I have had this intense… dislike…okay? For once, for the first time, he didn't need me."

"Didn't need you, right," I said with a laugh. "His first love, his first… everything, the one person that no one else could compete with."

"No one except the perfect girl with the perfect body and the perfect dress that made him completely forget about me."

"Who the hell was that?" I asked, taken off guard.

"Very funny."

Well…what do you know?

"That couldn't have been directed at me," I said softly. "Not…from you."

The silence was profound as we sat there for a moment, sizing each other up, all of our insecurities about one another laid out for the world to see. She had yet to deny, if she was going to at all, the accusation I had thrown at her, but I was so afraid of her answer… I just knew if she said she wanted Troy back, he would go in a heartbeat, no questions asked.

"I was wrong about one thing, though," she finally said. "You're obviously no…fling."

I could barely suppress a smile. "Is that so?"

"I'm happy that all of you are okay," she said. "I don't think he would have handled it at all well if any of you…hadn't…made it." I was reminded then that she had known his family for years, her concern for Ryan nearly tangible. "So…" Her voice trailed off as my nurse came in.

"I'm here for your discharge instructions, and I'm told that I am to make you be quiet and listen." It was Susan, one of the newer nurses in the ward, and I had to laugh.

"Good luck with that," I quipped.

"I…should go," Jess said. "I imagine this wont be our last opportunity to talk, Gabriella."

"It was much more cordial," I admitted, and she almost smiled. Her face was suddenly serious when she looked back at me.

"I still don't think you're good enough." Her eyes were unwavering as she stepped closer to me. "Just do me a favor, would you?"

"What's that?" I asked.

"Prove me wrong."

I was still confused as Troy drove me in near silence to my sister's. I wasn't aware of whether or not he even knew Jessica had come to see me. I was staring out the window softly murmuring the directions as we neared the streets we had to turn on.

"This isn't very far from John's place," Troy commented as he pulled up in front of Lisa's one story brick ranch.

"I wouldn't know," I said softly.

"Hey…" He reached out and stopped me with just a light touch on my arm. "Gabi…what's wrong?"

I sat back in the seat and sighed as I looked into those beautiful eyes. "I…don't know," I admitted. "And it's not that anything's wrong, it's that…"

I was silenced by his lips and I let out a trembling sigh against him. He instantly took advantage and deepened our kiss, teasing me with his teeth and tongue until I was whimpering, my hands buried in his tousled hair. He pulled back slightly and smiled.

"It's that…what?" he asked.

"Huh? Um…oh, hell, I don't know." I shook my head, regaining my composure as he opened his car door. "You don't fight fair."

"All's fair in…" He stopped suddenly, biting his bottom lip. "Let's get you inside."

Lisa had the guest room all ready for me, equipped with a Bible and a magazine or two on Christian living. Her husband Mark took my bags and welcomed Troy into their humble home. I almost had to roll my eyes, remembering all those years ago that Mark, Lisa, and I had spent our time numbing our senses.

"You should be nice and comfortable in here; this is your old bed, remember?" Lisa was asking.

"Yes, I do," I said softly. "Not the same mattress, though, I'm sure." I had cut that mattress to ribbons after Dad's funeral.

"And I'm sure your doctor wont mind you going to church with us," she continued, ignoring my comment. "And you understand that Troy will not be staying with you while you're here…"

"No, we're saving the sex until after I'm cleared," I cut her off, giggling when she glared at me. "Oh, come on, Lisa… like I never walked in on you and Mark."

"Mark and I are married."

"You weren't married then," I reminded her.

"But I knew we would be," she countered. "Can you say the same about your rock star?"

It was my turn for silence.

"Dr. Craig promised us he'd stop in to check on you," Mark was saying to me when Lisa and I walked out to the living room. Troy hesitated while bringing his drink to his lips for just a moment, but recovered before my sister or her husband noticed.

"That isn't necessary," I replied with a smile.

"But of course it is!" Lisa insisted. "He's genuinely concerned, and I just want some reassurance that you're doing fine."

"You realize he's just trying to get in my pants, right?" Troy choked back a laugh, covering with a cough, and Mark's brow furrowed at my statement. I had to smile. That would pretty much put the kibosh on Dr. Craig being left alone with me under this roof.

"Oh, pish posh," Lisa said with a wave of her hand. I stifled a giggle of my own as Troy mouthed the words "pish posh" to me, one eyebrow raised.

"Just the same, I think we should insure your sister's well being while in our home."

Mark and Lisa were discussing back and forth the importance of Dr. Craig's physical examination, or lack thereof, of me while Troy and I walked out to the back yard. I had always loved their back yard; it seemed to roll on forever. They had a small gazebo and a bench swing, a couple of beautiful flowering trees that killed my allergies in the spring. A large privacy fence that seemed disproportionate with the size of the house, but fit the lawn perfectly surroundeding it. I was standing, staring up at the blue sky when I felt Troy's hands circle my waist. He pulled me close and buried his face in my hair, inhaling deeply before leaving a soft kiss and resting his chin on top of my head.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"I think I'm going to have to remind myself over and over that they're family," I admitted. "But other than that, I'm wonderful. How about you?" I could feel his smile.

"Peaceful," he said, leaving another kiss. "Like all is…almost right in the world."

"Just almost?"

"Almost," he repeated, snuggling in. I winced as I felt a sharp pain that quickly dissipated. "I'm sorry," he said, stepping back and turning me around by my shoulders.

"I'm okay," I reassured him. "I'm just not a hundred percent yet."

"Hence the almost," he explained, lightly tucking a curl behind my ear. "And Ryan's still in the hospital for now, and… I have to play some shows to make up for the cancellations, thank you contractual obligations."

"Now?" I asked.

"Don't whine; it's unbecoming." He smiled, placing a light kiss on my lips. "I wont be gone long, I promise. Now that Ryan's out of the woods and now that you're okay, I need to do this."

"Will you call me?" I asked and he laughed.

"Do you really need to ask that question, Not Telling?" he teased against my lips before kissing me again. "You'll keep me sane…" He kissed a trail to my neck. "…And in a decent mood…"

"Which Jackie should appreciate," I half-moaned as he nipped lightly at my neck.

"Mmm hmmm," he agreed, his hands holding me to him as he kissed my lips once more. He was careful with me, holding me as if I was fragile, ignoring my protests when he wouldn't hold me closer.

"I'm not… interrupting, am I?" John's voice caused us both to jump. Lisa was escorting him out to the back yard.

"Of course you are," Troy said to him, and Lisa laughed as if he'd made the funniest joke in the world.

"Dr. Craig is here to examine Gabriella," Lisa explained.

"Gabriella was examined before she left the hospital." Troy's tone was guarded, his glare icy.

"I'm sure he…"

"Lisa, could you excuse us, please?" I interrupted her, giving her my sweetest smile.

"Of course," she said begrudgingly. "I'll be inside if anyone needs anything." There was an awkward silence while the three of us waited for Lisa to go back inside and shut the door.

"I wanted to see for myself that you were okay," John said, ignoring Troy's glare. "And I wanted to let you know if you need anything, call me."

"I think she's just…" Troy stopped as I squeezed his hand.

"How's Jess?" John asked as he finally looked at Troy.

"Jess is fine," I spoke up. "I talked to her before I was discharged from the hospital." I felt Troy's eyes on me, but I held John's gaze as I tried to get the message through to him. "I appreciate your concern, John… but the drama's over."

"Is it?" Two simple words that I didn't honestly have the answer to, and I felt awkward having made such a bold statement without talking things over with Troy first. I opened my mouth to say something, but had no witty reply.

"It doesn't concern you," Troy said simply.

Oh, wow. I must have spoken too soon.

"As a friend, it does," John corrected him. "I want you to know you can call me whenever you need anything."

"Thank you," I said politely.

"Anytime," he said with a smile. "I'll see you around." As he walked back into the house I felt Troy still tensed up beside me.

"I don't like this…"

"Don't worry about any of this," I cut him off. "Just promise me when the tour dates are done…"

"I'll be right back here," he said with a smile.

"Gabriella?" I heard Lisa calling out to me. "It's nearly time for supper and our daily reading."

"Reading?" I asked.

"Today's from the book of Job," she replied.

"Ah, suffering… nice," I said softly. Troy was grinning sheepishly at me. "Oh, they're family," I mocked him. "You should be with them… family."

"I will rescue you the first chance I get." He paused for a moment. "You didn't tell me you spoke with Jess."

"I didn't know what to say. I still don't."

"Is that why you were upset?"

"I can't really say that I'm upset," I tried to explain. "It's just… Troy, I don't understand."

"What don't you understand, Christine?" His voice was as soothing as his hands. I shrugged slightly, uncomfortable with asking. "Just say it."

"Why are you here?"

"Ah," he said.

"Ah? That's it? Ah?"

"No that's not it…damn, woman, give me a chance to answer." He was smiling at me.

"Troy…"

"I'm here because I want to be," his words silenced me once more. "Because I chose to be."

He held my gaze as I wrapped my head around his words, taking in the full meaning of them. I was unable to say anything in return as one small tear slipped down my cheek. Ignoring the discomforting tug at my side, I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him…full, lingering, deep, leaving us both gasping slightly for air.

"Oh come on, Gabriella… not in my back yard either." We jumped as Lisa walked out.

"Sorry," I muttered as Troy and I walked hand-in-hand to the back door. I stopped and grinned at my oldest sister. "You know…except I'm not."

At least this time I saw her try to stifle a smile as she ushered us back into her house. 


	43. Chapter 43

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOURTY-THREE**

"T minus five days and counting." This was the greeting I received at 2:35 in the morning, reminding me just how long I had until he was coming to rescue me from my sister's house.

"That's still too much time," I complained, waiting for his usual retort to my whining.

"God, I know," was what I heard instead. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too," I said softly, biting the inside of my lip to keep from tearing up.

"Did she torture you too much today?" he asked, trying to lighten the tone. "Are you still reading from the book of Job?"

"They're pushing any kind of scripture on me that tells me I'm going to hell if I don't change my ways."

"I like your ways." Even without him being in front of me, I felt myself blush. "She's not convincing you to dump me and head off to some… convent or something, is she?"

"And live out eternity without ever ravishing you again? Not a chance."

"Not Telling Christine, you insufferable tease, what ever am I going to do with you?"

"Is that a rhetorical question, or do you really want an answer?" I heard him inhale sharply.

"Have I mentioned that I miss you?" he asked, his voice sending a chill through my body.

"How much?" I asked, testing just a tiny bit to see if he'd tell.

"I can't sleep." He sighed at his confession before continuing. "I can't sleep, I'm not eating well, I can't concentrate, I can't write, I… just… miss you." I tried masking the tears his words had brought to me, but he heard anyway. "Gabi, please…please don't cry."

"I'm…okay, I am, but I know… God, I know exactly what you mean."

"What a pair we make," he said in reply. "Well…yeah, we do. What a pair."

"Think I can just stay on the phone with you until the five days are up?"

"I wish," he said. "I'm actually on my way to the airport, catching the redeye to the next city."

"Is Alfred driving you?"

"Nope, he's sitting right beside me, rolling his eyes and making those faces like he's getting ready to gag." I had to laugh at that. "Jeez, Gabi, does this mean we're like… one of… those couples?"

"Yes," I heard Jackie say, and I laughed even harder.

"Are we?" I asked, closing my eyes and waiting for his reply.

"Yes…yes. Yes."

And my heart soared once more.

"Do you make it a habit to spend your nocturnal hours on the phone?" Lisa asked me the next day. I was curled up in the den sipping on a Diet Pepsi with one of the many movie channels on waiting for my fifty millionth run of 'So I Married an Axe Murderer'.

"I have for a few months now, yes," I replied, placing my can in its obligatory coaster. "Does it disturb you?"

"There are… several things that disturb me to be quite honest with you, Gabriella."

"Lisa, please…"

"I watched you head down that path of self-destruction when we were losing Daddy and I said nothing," she cut me off. "I watched you go through men like water. I watched you ingest any chemical you could get your hands on…"

"If I recall correctly, for most of my teenage years the majority of those chemicals I acquired from you." She paused and lowered her head briefly.

"I have had to live with that every single day, Gabriella. I had to look Mom in the eye and tell her that you were fine when you were so stoned you couldn't see. I had to cover for you when you went chasing after men, after numbness… God, after Death, because let's face it, that's where you were headed. And I'm the one that introduced this to you."

"Lisa, I'm…not some druggie or some degenerate. I turned out okay for all the shit that happened, and just for the record if I hadn't gotten the alcohol or the drugs from you, I would have gotten them from somewhere else."

"I know that you've pulled your life around, somewhat." Lisa was quick to add that 'somewhat.'

"What do you mean, somewhat?"

"I know you're a nurse and you're self-sufficient, which is more than we can say for some of the other members of our family…"

"Nice way to not gossip, Lisa."

"Damnit, Gabriella, you're going to listen to me!" Her stern tone caused the hairs on the back of my neck to bristle. "You still run around the bars, you still get into more trouble than you can handle or I wouldn't see it in the tabloids, and you've become some… some… groupie…"

"Excuse me?"

"You think he's faithful to you when he's on the road? You think that because he's calling you at some ungodly hour that it must mean that he's not screwing around on you?" I narrowed my eyes at her accusations. "I'm just looking out for you. I've seen what happens when your life spirals out of control, Gabriella."

"You want to know…if I think he's faithful?"

"Yes, I want to know," she reiterated. I considered my answer carefully, feeling my facial features relax as I thought of him, of our last conversation.

"Absolutely," I replied, a goofy smile threatening to break forward. Oh…God.

We were one of those couples.

"Okay," she said softly. "Well… if I find out differently… if he hurts you… I swear to you… I'm going to chop his balls off."

"Lisa!" I exclaimed, swatting at her. "You shameless hussy you, go wash your mouth out with soap!"

"Screw you," she muttered, reaching over me and taking a handful of popcorn. "And what are you doing watching this movie? This was my favorite movie first, you damn pipsqueak."

"Go now, you've stayed your hour," I mimicked a line, pointing at the door.

"Just remember whose house you're at, Brat."

"Shesh, whatever."

"Troy," I was saying in the middle of the night when he had called again, "I think my sister has a split personality." He laughed, one of those endearing laughs that I could listen to for hours. "No… no, seriously, like one minute she's all… 'You're going to hell for hanging out in bars', and the next she's saying that if you hurt me she's going to chop your balls off."

"Hey…hey… no joking about the nether regions there," his tone of voice changed drastically.

"Who's joking? I think Sybil was serious."

"Oh, great; one fuck up by me and it's Castration City. How would I sound as a mezzo-soprano? Hmmmm."

"You said you could do the Spice Girls," I reminded him. "Oh, and Hanson, let's not forget Hanson."

"And is it…spayed, or neutered? Which one of that is done to the male?"

"Do you really want to find out?"

"I think the question here is… do you?" I could hear the smile.

"Nah, I haven't had my fill of you yet," I replied breathlessly as I flopped back on my bed.

"Gah! Damnit, woman, stop it!"

"T minus?"

"Four days and fucking counting," he replied through gritted teeth.

"Mmmmm, I love it when you do that."

"Gabriella… Christine… I swear to you I'll hang up this phone."

"Liar."

"Okay, you called me on that one." I heard him exhale slowly.

"You sound so tired," I commented.

"I am," he replied with a sigh.

"Still can't sleep?"

"I'm trying, Gabi, I really am."

"It doesn't sound like you're trying hard enough," I said. "So I'm making you hang up, whether you want to or not, and close your eyes. Rest."

"When I close my eyes, I see you."

"Oh, that's good Troy. That's… that's clever."

"That's serious." I could tell he wasn't joking by the tone he used when he said those two words.

"Well, what the hell good are you gonna be to me if you're so damn tired that all you do is fall right to sleep when you get here?"

"But…it's different," he said.

"How so?"

"Because," he began, "this time… we'll have all the time in the world."

Now, how the hell was I supposed to sleep after hearing that?


	44. Chapter 44

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOURTY-FOUR**

"Mark, you don't honestly believe your constant harping is going to make me, say… snap my fingers and become Mary freakin Poppins, do you?" I asked on my final night there. "Enough about how I'm going to hell already!"

"Now, Gabriella…"

"Say, do you remember when we threw that big fuck off party and I walked in on you and Lisa totally screwing in my Mom and Dad's bed?" I didn't want to tell him that Lisa and I had been laughing our asses off about it while Mark was at work; something suddenly seemed amiss to me in their perfect life.

"We don't talk about such things."

I know he was continuing his speech, but luckily my phone was ringing and I excused myself by merely holding up one finger and walking away to answer.

"T minus how many hours before you get your ass here and fucking rescue me already?" I asked with a smile through gritted teeth.

"Awww…did I interrupt Bible hour?"

"Troy… you don't sound like you're in an airport."

"That's because…I'm not."

"You're not?" I felt my heart sink. "What do you mean you're not? They're not keeping you back there, are they? Please tell me they're not…"

"Gabi…"

"I mean, I'd survive, but damnit, I miss you! I love you and I miss you…"

"Gabriella…"

"…and you need to be here now! Like right now, so I can hold you and kiss you and…"

"Christine…"

I sighed when he said my middle name, feeling that familiar tightening in my stomach. "What?" I asked, finally snapped out of my rambling.

"Get your ass out here, now."

"What?!" I asked, my head snapping around to the front of the house. Looking through the sheer curtains that covered the large picture window, I saw a familiar silhouette, shadows of the setting sun catching the highlights in his hair as he stood, one hand holding his phone, the other raising slightly to wave hello when he knew I saw him.

"Christine, I'm not going to stand here…" I didn't hear the rest of what he was saying as the phone slipped from my fingers landing with a soft thud on the carpet where my feet had stood before I'd taken off in a sprint, throwing the front door open and bounding across the lawn.

Neither of us gave a damn about discretion as he scooped me up into his arms, burying his face in the side of my neck and inhaling deeply as we held each other. "I missed you," he breathed, and I sighed as my body responded instantly to his touch and his voice. As if he could tell, he moaned softly in my ear, "Mmm, baby girl, I know…I know…" My eyes slid shut as he was kissing my neck. "It's been too long."

A slight gasp left my lips, and he captured it with a kiss and a sigh as we stood there, the cool breeze not fazing us. My palms were cupping his face as he kissed me deeply, fully, sighing "It drives me crazy when you do that," against my lips.

"I thought I made myself clear," Mark's voice resonated from somewhere in the vicinity of the front porch.

Troy's words were punctuated with kisses and sighs as he refused to let go of me. "We… are not… in… your house…Mark."

"The least you could do is get a room," Lisa whispered as she brought my bags out to the lawn. I finally stopped kissing Troy long enough to smile at her.

"I didn't get a room," Troy whispered in my ear and I shivered involuntarily. "I hope that wasn't too presumptuous of me."

"Not at all," I said softly, placing a sweet kiss on his lips before turning my head to look at Lisa. "Thank you, Leesie," I used my pet name I'd called her as a child, trying to not sway as Troy nuzzled my neck once more. "If you need anything, call me."

"Thank you, Gabriella," she said softly. "Jeezus, Troy, come up for air and let me say hello, goodbye, and all that stuff."

"Show your hands so I can see that no butcher knives are present," Troy said with a raised eyebrow, and Lisa…laughed. A genuine heartfelt laugh. She gave him a quick hug.

"Take care of my baby sister," I heard her whisper to him. "She's very precious to me."

"To me, too," Troy replied softly back to her. He stepped back from her, still keeping me in his arms. "Hey, this wont be the last I see of you, will it?"

"I'll drag her out to play, kicking and screaming if I have to," I spoke up.

"Gabi…"

"Even if playing consists of dinner and a movie," I cut her off, knowing she still had a problem with the bar scene.

"Throw in popcorn and it's a deal."

"Just to let you know," Troy started, "the words 'throw' and 'popcorn' should never be used together around her. Hey, ow!" he added as I swatted him.

"I was going to say that since you're here instead of on the road, perhaps she'll get some sleep. Somehow now I'm doubting that." I smiled at Lisa who was ignoring the dirty looks Mark was shooting her.

"I'll be fine, don't worry about me," I replied. "But…no offense… I wanna go home." From my position, my head nestled up against Troy's chest, I could swear I heard his heart skip a tiny beat and I smiled as he placed a kiss on top of my head.

All of my nerve endings seemed to be tingling the entire twenty-minute ride through traffic to my apartment across town. I sat in that passenger seat of his rental car, seatbelt buckled, my head resting against the back of the seat as I kept my eyes on Troy.

"You're making this ride a little uncomfortable, looking at me that way," he said, his voice low and raspy. My eyes glanced down to his jeans and I smiled, knowing the full meaning of his words.

"I could always…you know…unbuckle my seatbelt and…"

"Don't you fucking dare," he said quickly, his hands gripping the steering wheel a little tighter. I was going to laugh and make a lewd comment about how he couldn't handle my mouth on him and driving at the same time when I realized what he was saying.

"I was just joking."

"It's not funny…it's not…fucking…funny." He took one hand off the wheel to give mine a squeeze before returning to his original position.

"Troy…"

"I could have lost you, Gabi, don't you get that?" He didn't take his eyes off the road for good reason, but I wondered if we weren't in the car whether or not he could keep eye contact with me then.

"We weren't exactly…"

"Then you don't get it," he cut me off before I could remind him that we weren't together. He remained silent the rest of the way, pulling into the apartment complex, his hands shaking ever so slightly as he shut off the engine.

"Do you need help with your things?" I asked and he shook his head, still not looking at me. I sighed as I exited the car and reached in to get my bag.

"Leave it, Gabi. Let me get it for you." He was still sitting there behind the wheel looking forward.

"Are you going to sit there all night, or are you going to come in and let me throw popcorn at you?" I asked, finally getting a soft grin from him.

"How could I resist that?" was his reply as he winked at me and quickly exited the car. He grabbed my things and followed behind me, pausing as I unlocked the door. I hadn't been home since the accident, and I wondered for a brief moment how bad the place must look and possibly even… smell, oh God I hadn't been there to take out the garbage, or anything, and…

He had his hand on the door pushing it open from behind me as if he sensed my hesitation. My mouth was open to protest, but my eyes caught a glimpse of something rather… colorful…

My floor lamp in the living room was set on low, giving off a soft glow in the downstairs. The stereo was playing my collection of classical music that I loved to unwind to, there was a bottle of wine chilling in a bucket on my dining room table, and everywhere…nearly everywhere I could see, there were lilies.

Lilies.

My favorite.

I had told him that in passing two weeks into our anonymous phone conversations, when I had caught a glimpse of some lilies in some late night TV show that was playing in the background. I never in a million years thought something so small would be tucked away in the recesses of that incredible mind of his.

A tear escaped and ran down my cheek as I slowly walked through to my living room, stopping briefly here and there as I walked along silently. My apartment was spotless…absolutely spotless, and the floral scent was breathtakingly beautiful.

"How…how could you…"

"I have to admit, I didn't actually… do it." Troy was standing directly behind me, his arms wrapped securely around my waist, his words breathed into my ear. "I asked Kelsi if she could help, told her what I wanted and when the flowers would be here. Apparently someone's a little absentminded and makes sure one or more of her friends has a key to her apartment." I laughed softly. "Perhaps if you gave them…"

"One more word about that damn code and I'm cutting you off."

He kissed my neck, his teeth and tongue drawing a soft whimper from me. "Liar," he said, his hands finding their way under my shirt, hot against my skin.

"What makes…you…so…sure?" I asked, feeling my body's betrayal, knowing even without an intimate touch that I was ready for him. His hands worked quickly, one unclasping my bra as the other slipped beneath the silky fabric. "Oh…that…"

"Oh that?" he interrupted his teasing nips at my neck to ask. "Just… oh…that?"

I turned to him then, my hands twisting in his shirt and roughly pulling him to me, our kisses on my sister's front lawn looking like child's play as we frantically made short work of our shirts, Troy tossing my bra to the side just before his kisses left me breathless once more. Just the feel of skin on skin had me helpless, trembling, begging for more.

"I…don't know…" His breath was coming in ragged gasps even as I was unbuttoning his jeans, cupping him with one hand while sliding the zipper down with the other.

"The hell you don't," I said, slipping my hand inside, a low moan sounding in his throat as my fingers closed around him.

"Gabi, I don't want to hurt you." He said this even as he was lying me back on the couch, my hands pulling his jeans and boxer briefs down past his hip bones.

"I'm injured, Troy, not dead." I pulled him down beside me, gasping as his hand reached between my legs. He was right, he was so right…it had been far too long.

"God, you're ready for me…"

"Yes," I whimpered against his lips as his fingers continued teasing me.

"I don't want to hurt you," he repeated, hushing my moan with a kiss. "I…won't hurt you." My eyes flew open as he pulled his hand back just in time to watch him move quickly, roughly pulling the rest of my clothes off in one fluid motion and crawling back up my body, his kisses on my inner thighs nearly my undoing. When his tongue started working magic that put his fingers to shame, I was lost…utterly, completely, lost, crying out at the sudden ecstasy that was flooding through my body. My back arched, heightening the pleasure even more, and I found myself tangling my fingers in his hair, holding him as he drew every last shudder and sigh from me, only kissing his way up my body after the tension had finally left my limbs. "Beautiful," he moaned. "Always, always beautiful."

Even as breathless as I was, my hands were tugging at the waistband of his jeans, my thumbs hooked inside the boxers as well. "No…no, baby, it's too soon after the accident," he was saying as he was placing soft kisses on my neck and face. I could feel him pressed up against my hip, knowing he wanted this no matter his protests.

"I said…" I surprised him with my strength as I rolled to my side, pushing him on his back. "…I'm not fucking dead."

"Gabi…" His protest died in his throat as I made my intentions clear, kissing down that happy trail as I worked his jeans and boxer briefs down, and finally off his body. It was his turn to moan as my tongue ran up the length of him, his turn to bury his hands in my hair as he neared his own release. I held him to me as he went over the edge, tasting him the way he had me, glowing in the fact that I had just as much power over him. He was still breathing heavily, a thin sheen of perspiration across him as I returned the favor, kissing my way up his body to his neck as his breathing was slowly returning to normal. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me to him in the warmest embrace, his heart hammering against his ribcage.

"Welcome home, Gabriella," he was finally able to whisper.

"Right back atcha," I said with a giggle, still a bit breathless myself. "I love you, Troy."

I have no idea whether or not he answered as we both drifted into a well-deserved sleep.


	45. Chapter 45

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOURTY-FIVE**

"You know," Troy was saying to me, "this may sound… odd… but I'm really glad that we didn't figure out we'd known each other before. You know, not until later."

"Why's that?" I asked, sorting through the laundry I had finished.

"Because," he continued, helping me by putting his clothes into a separate pile, "then there would have been all these…" He paused, making grand gestures with his hands. "Expectations."

I pondered his statement for a moment. "Do you really think so?"

"Yeah, I do." He stopped and took a drink of his Dr. Pepper. "We both would have expected the other to be if not the same, then at least remotely similar to how we'd been as teenagers."

"And that's one thing neither one of us is," I added for him, and he smiled and winked at me.

"Exactly," he said.

"You certainly have more confidence than you did back then," I commented.

"Yes and no?" I looked at him inquisitively. "I can fake it better? No, just kidding… sort of. You're right, I'm more confident in several aspects, like my music."

"You doubted yourself musically? You're… kidding?"

"Sometimes, sure." He shrugged. "And there are times now when I still do, but with the success I've been blessed with I feel vindicated, like all those hours, all those years I busted my ass trying to prove I could actually do this was all worth it."

"You've earned your success, Troy," I agreed.

"Along with this time off," he added, kissing my forehead softly.

"Three weeks holed up with me and you're telling me you're not the least bit antsy?"

"I've enjoyed every single second of it," he whispered in my ear, leaving another soft kiss on my temple. "However," he added, standing back and swatting my behind. "You had no business carrying that basket of laundry."

"The hell I didn't, I'm fine," I argued, flipping him with a shirt before I folded it.

"We'll see how fine you are at your appointment today." He had a slight grin on his face when he said it, and I felt my stomach tighten.

"You're right… that is today."

"You never know, the doc may tell you that you still have to take it easy." He pulled me into his arms, throwing the sweatshirt that I'd had in my hands aside. He leaned down, leaving light, wet kisses on my neck as he continued, "I don't know about you…but I've had fun being creative these past few weeks."

"Of course I have," I moaned softly, my hands holding him to me, gasping as my body instantly responded. "Troy, please, you don't know…what that does… to me."

He laughed softly in my ear. "Yes I do," he said before his lips found mine. "God, Gabi," he breathed, pulling back slightly, his hands shaking.

"We already know the doctor will say it's okay," I tried reasoning with him. He bit his bottom lip, staring at me with absolute hunger in his eyes… and shook his head 'no'. "No?! " I asked, raising an eyebrow as he went back to folding clothes. "Are you serious… no?"

"We have to get going soon." His voice was tight, his pants even tighter.

"I don't think…"

"I get you up in that bed, Christine, and you're not going anywhere the rest of the day." His head was down, eyes looking up at me, and I felt my knees start to go weak.

"Is that so?"

"Go…get ready." He pointed up the stairs.

"Help me?" I asked, smiling innocently. I felt my pulse quicken as he reached for me, expertly pulling my shirt over my head. He tossed it to the side, still holding me under his intense gaze.

"Go," he repeated, his voice lower. I stepped closer to him instead.

"Is that all?"

He reached around with one hand, unclasping my bra, pulled it forward and off my arms, adding it to the shirt on the floor. I didn't cover myself and instead took another step closer.

"Go." He still held my gaze, refusing to move even when I pulled his shirt up slightly, pressing myself to him.

"Come with me."

"Fuck, Gabi," he muttered through clenched teeth, his eyes sliding shut.

"Exactly," I whispered, kissing his chest.

"No." The word was shaky but his hands were on me, one of them tangling in my hair, pulling my head back slightly to give him perfect access as he kissed me, leaving me breathless. "I don't want…to fuck you, Gabi," his words were hot in my ear. "I want… to make…" He growled as the phone began to ring.

"Ignore it," I pleaded, pulling him into another passionate kiss to keep him from walking away.

"You know we shouldn't," he said, stepping back. He cleared his throat, before giving me one last warning look. "Go…get ready." I stuck out my bottom lip as he answered the phone, attempting to not sound hot and bothered.

"Wait, you're… answering my phone now?"

"Quit your bitching, woman, and go get ready," he said to me, pointing at the stairs again. I stuck my tongue out at him and started walking up the stairs slowly, listening to his side of the conversation. "Over at Taylor's? Tonight? Um…"

"What's over at Taylor's?" I asked, turning slightly.

"Ryan," he replied. "And Kelsi. Oh, and Sharpay and… Derrick?" I smiled warmly. "Well, judging by her face the answer is yes."

"You shouldn't have rejected me," I teased, continuing up the stairs.

"Hey! I so did not…" he called out after me, then quickly added into the phone, "Dude, sorry, I didn't mean to yell in your ear. What time, then?"

I had already showered that morning so getting ready merely consisted of changing clothes and touching up the hair and makeup. In no time I was going back down the stairs deftly, as if the accident had never happened at all. Troy had also changed clothes, looking casual but oh so comfortable. He smiled at me, grabbing a baseball hat and his sunglasses as I walked up to him.

"Hello, beautiful," he said softly, placing a kiss on my forehead. "I told them we'd be by shortly after your appointment."

"But…but…"

"I know, we have somewhere else to go first. Do you have everything?"

I checked my totebag, making sure all of my provisions were present. "Yes, I do."

"Are you sure?" he asked, and I bit my bottom lip trying to think of what he was implying was missing.

"I…think?"

He held up my keys that had been sitting on the back of the couch and I grinned at him sheepishly.

"Come on," he said, putting his arm around me and urging me forward. "Let's go hear some good news."

"I've had three weeks of good news," I commented, feeling him smile against my temple as he left a soft kiss there.


	46. Chapter 46

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**CHAPTER FOURTY-SIX**

"Hows come you never let me drive?" I was asking as we left my doctor's office.

"Hows come? Hows…come? Didn't you graduate with a 4.0?" Troy peered over at me as he cranked the ignition. "As in… your bachelors, all that medical jargon, and…"

"Quit avoiding the question," I cut him off.

"Ask properly and maybe I'll answer," he replied with a smile, pulling out of the parking spot with ease after glancing at the directions I had written down.

"Never mind," I said dreamily. "This way I can watch you." He continued smiling devilishly, reaching over and cranking the stereo as my most loathed song came over the airwaves. "Hey!" I swatted at his hand and changed the station, laughing along with him.

"No hitting the driver."

"Says who?"

"Says me, and it's according to the rules…that I just made up. So there." He stuck his tongue out, never taking his eyes off the road.

"So there?" I asked, rolling my eyes. "How old are you again?"

"Old enough to behave myself until I get you home." I felt my cheeks flushing with color, my pulse quickening slightly.

"Told you they'd clear me today," I said, feeling vindicated.

"No, he said he doesn't want you going back to work for a couple more weeks."

"We didn't discuss anything about work," I argued.

"You said you'd be cleared, they said you couldn't go back to work yet, so…" He shrugged.

"You just don't want to admit I was right."

"Don't put words in my mouth," he said, still grinning.

"I could put more than words in your mouth." Again with vindication as his cheeks started turning pink.

"Christine, I told you…" His hands were gripping the steering wheel a little tighter now. "…If I'd gotten you up in that bedroom…" He stole a sideways glance at me. "…We'd still be there."

"Promises, promises," I mumbled, reaching over and lightly tracing the outline of his ear.

"Christine…"

"You're right, you're right," I said, smiling and facing forward in my seat. "Besides, we have a couple places left to go first. Then…" It was my turn to glance sideways at him. "You're all mine."

"Eh, promises, promises." He laughed when I swatted his arm as we continued on to our first destination.

He pulled into the lot, his choice of parking spot available. "It isn't very busy during the week… unless…" My voice trailed off as I looked out. "Nope, looks like it's fairly quiet here."

"It's beautiful," Troy said as he stepped out of the car and stretched slightly.

"Isn't it?" I pulled the tote bag out, placing it on my shoulder. "You ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

We walked hand in hand down the small path that had started growing over. I hadn't been able to make the trek since the accident, but today…well, this day was special.

I knelt down and kissed the headstone as I always did. "Hi Mom, Hi Dad." I sat down and patted the ground beside me. Troy sat down, placed an arm around me, and kissed my temple softly. I leaned against him, breathing in the scent of the fresh flowers that were placed on the grave.

"Looks like Lisa's been here, too," he remarked, and I smiled.

"Or one of the others…but yeah, I'd like to think it was her." I reached out and gently touched them. "There's even a couple lilies in there."

"I think they'd be happy the two of you are getting along so well."

"Oh, I know they are." I turned to smile at him. "This is it, right where I was sitting that day…when I told you I was so happy that you called me. You know, when we finally started…"

"…talking again," he finished for me, wiping a stray tear that had escaped and ran down my face.

"I would just bring a book, my coffee, and sit up here every chance I got. Or, I'd just…think, you know…about my mistakes, and what I needed to do to fix them. Sometimes," I smiled as he kissed my cheek. "Sometimes I would talk to them, and I swear they were listening."

"What were you doing that day?" he asked.

"Talking," I admitted with a soft smile. "I was talking to them about you."

"About me?" He blinked a couple times before I continued.

"Yes, about you. About how I missed you, how I missed talking to you."

"You don't have to miss that anymore." His voice was barely above a whisper when he said it. I leaned towards him, cupping his face in my hands just before I kissed him. "Young lady, not where your parents can see us," he teased after I pulled back.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." I couldn't stop the smile as I reached into the totebag and pulled out a large photo album.

"What's this?"

"This…" I opened to the front page, an older picture of my entire family smiling up at us. "…is my dad, James."

"Is that you on his lap?" Troy asked, and I nodded through my tears. "God, you look just like him."

"Thank you," I said, glowing with pride. "And this is my mom."

"Elizabeth," he said with a smile. "Now I have good memories of that name…oh, wait… her eyes! They're the same color as yours. She's beautiful, Gabi."

"She would have eaten you up with a spoon." Troy laughed at my comment before I continued. "And you know Lisa. She's the oldest."

"She had a sour puss look on her face then, too," Troy commented.

"She was probably mad at Shelly. That's…" I pointed at her. "Her. She isn't much younger than Lisa. And there's Jeff, and Eric…that's one's Eric."

"That pipsqueak?"

"That pipsqueak is about 6' 5" now." Troy's eyebrows disappeared under his bangs. "Don't worry, he's a bug wuss."

"That's nice to know."

"And this is Tracey. She's only about a year or so older than me…yeah, just over a year older."

"Damn, your parents were busy."

"I don't think they watched much television," I agreed. My eyes lingered over that family photo another moment before turning the page.

"So you don't really speak to any of them?" Troy asked. "I mean, aside from Lisa now?"

"No," I replied, my voice wistful as I looked at the old photographs. "Lisa had kinda taken me in as I got older. She and Shelly always argued, just like I always argued with Tracey. So it was Shelly and Tracey, and me and Lisa. Oh, and Jeff and Eric, when they weren't trying to kill each other."

"Looks like your dad was a big Rocky fan," Troy commented, looking at another page of Dad with the boys. Just before his diagnosis we had gone on a trip to Philadelphia, and there they were, all three of them on the top of the steps with their Rocky pose.

I turned the page again, unable to stifle a giggle at the pictures of me getting into Lisa's makeup.

"I bet she was pissed."

"Actually… no." I sighed. "I was only eight or so…I think? She was a senior in high school."

"Damn, they did have you all close."

"Told you so. Lisa stayed while she was in college. I was thirteen when she gave me my first beer."

"Thirteen?"

"Yeah," I replied. "I had grown up way too fast…I think we all did. We had to." My voice trailed off again as I was lost in the memories. Troy would laugh and ask the questions, and I answered them the best I could, alternating between laughter and tears. Towards the back of the album, we started getting into pictures from that era… the one where my time was spent split between New Mexico and Florida, when Dad was near the end.

"Wow." Troy actually seemed rendered speechless. "Wow, I remember…" His fingers traced the page, looking at the pictures of me then. I seemed to always dress provocatively, always have that same pout on my face.

"My mom called that 'The Look.' I guess I can see why now."

"You never glared at me like that," he said.

"You were…" I took a deep breath before continuing. "Troy, you were the only person I could talk to, and I mean really, really talk to. I know I wasn't honest…the whole saying it was Mom thing… but…" I smiled at him through my tears. "The boy with the beautiful eyes," I said softly, noticing the tears there.

"It was the same for me." He tucked a stray curl behind my ear, the sweet gesture tugging at my heart. "That's what was so different…is what's so different, even now."

"One last one," I said, my voice soft as I turned the page. "Lisa gave this to me when I was staying with her."

I watched his face as he glanced down at the photograph, one edge bent even in its protective cover. I could feel his body tense as he recognized the scene, that old hospital waiting room we'd both spent hours on end in. There, in the far corner, huddled together were two kids in their teens—one a thin boy with wild hair, the other a young girl with far too much makeup and clothes that fit like a glove. They were facing each other, holding hands slightly between them, and smiling…glowing as if one had said something insanely funny and they both got it.

"Gabi…that's…that's us." His eyes were wide with wonder.

"Lisa just happened to have a camera that night," I continued, my lower lip trembling as I watched a tear fall down his face. "She said it was…" I took in a shaky breath. "She said it was the only time she remembered me smiling back then, and she was so surprised she wanted…a memory."

"I don't remember smiling much then," he said softly. "Except with you." Our eyes met then and we sat in silence, the memories in the air between us. "This…" He pointed at the picture without looking down. "This is what I'm talking about. And I meant what I said when I told you I'm happy we didn't know at first. This proves it, Gabi. This proves that something…something bigger than us knew what to do when our paths crossed, then and now. That without even trying, without expecting anything, we…connected." He shrugged again, even through his tears. "We're right where we're supposed to be."

"I love you, Troy," I whispered as he pulled me in for a kiss, the breeze slightly blowing over us. "And I'm going to throw your phone in a fucking lake if it keeps interrupting us."

"Hey, hey, watch your language around your parents," he teased, pulling his ringing phone out of his pocket.

"What are they gonna do?" I asked, the rumble of thunder in the distance answering me. "Crap, sorry," I whispered, patting the headstone, making Troy laugh as he answered his phone.

"Hey, what's up?" He pulled me close with his free arm, holding me to him as he talked with his brother. "Yeah, yeah, her appointment's done. Gabi's…" He paused, pulling back slightly to look at me. "Ryan, she's perfect." I leaned in and kissed him softly, teasing his lips as his brother continued talking. Troy pulled back, shooting a warning look at me before saying, "We'll be there in just a little bit. We had something to do first."

I was still grinning when he hung up his phone. "What?" I asked innocently.

"Get your things together, Woman," he said, his half-smile getting to me as it always did. I giggled like a fucking schoolgirl, damn him, as I closed the photo album and lifted it to place in my totebag. A tiny slip of paper slid out and fell to the ground as I did so. Troy picked it up, eyeing it suspiciously while I continued to zip up the bag.

"What?" I asked as he looked between the paper and me.

"Gabriella…um…your answering machine code…"

"Oh, shut up about the code already! I told you I made it something easy so I wouldn't forget it, and I forgot it! I'll just have to check all messages from home, and…what are you doing?" He was dialing a number on his phone, grinning from ear to ear.

"Testing a theory," he replied, that tiny slip of paper still in his hand. He waited for just a moment, punched in four numbers, and waited just a moment more before roaring with laughter.

"What?" I asked, confused. He was doubled over, holding his side when he handed his phone to me. I heard a message that was left on my home answering machine just barely over his laughter. "How did you…" My question was cut short when he slipped the piece of paper to me, wiping the tears from his eyes as I read my writing.

EASY- 3279

3-2-7-9. My code. Easy.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," I muttered, swatting at him as I stood up, hanging up his phone and holding it out for him. "Are you gonna spend the rest of the day laughing at me, or are you gonna come with me to Taylor's?"

"Oh come on, it's funny!" he exclaimed, standing quickly and scooping me up into his arms. I was giggling softly as he swung me around. The breeze had picked up considerably at this point, and we both noticed the approaching dark clouds.

"Come on, giddy boy, let's get going before we're caught in the rain."

"Would you mind being caught in the rain?" he asked, his eyes still sparkling as we began the walk back to my car.

"With you? Wouldn't mind it at all. Why?"

"Just checking," he replied. He placed my totebag in the back seat and opened my car door, bowing slightly as I got in.

"Oh, it's getting deep here," I teased. He smiled then, closing my door and walking around to the driver's side. Once secure in his seat, both of our seatbelts fastened, he started the car and pulled out of the lot.

"Hey," he began as he drove towards Taylor's house, "how's come I have to drive all the time?"

"Hows come?" I asked, raising my eyebrow. "Hows…come? What kind of vocabulary is that?"

"I'm just sayin," he replied with a wink and a smile, and our back-and-forth continued all the way to our next destination.


	47. Authors Note

Oh my gosh! Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed my story. To say I'm surprised by the response to this story is an understatement. I have had this story completed on my computer for several months, not knowing if I should post it or not, but now I am so glad that I did. It's sad to say, though, that I only have two more chapters plus an epilogue left to post. I hope that everyone has enjoyed the story. I'm debating on whether or not to write a sequel, but we'll see. Please let me know. And if you would like a sequel, write me a few ideas that you might like to see. Again, thanks for reviewing, and please continue to let me know what you think…its much appreciated!!!!


	48. Chapter 47

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

CHAPTER FOURTY-SEVEN

The atmosphere at Taylor and Chad's house was completely full of energy. There were pizza boxes opened on the table, paper plates beside them, and every where I looked there was someone else to say hello to, give a hug to, share the latest story with. It was almost like old times, minus Taylor's expanding waistline and Sharpay having an actual boyfriend. Oh, and me. I was most definitely different.

"Easy? Seriously?" Ryan was asking Troy as I passed by.

"Oh, come on, you're so not talking about that now," I said.

"But…it's funny!" Troy replied since Ryan couldn't due to being doubled over with laughter.

"It's not that funny," I muttered, my smile giving my lighthearted mood away. Ryan caught me with one arm as I tried walking away from them and gave me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Easy there, little man," Troy said, pulling me close. "Go grab Kelsi for some action, Gabi's off limits."

"Okay, get me out of the middle of this testosterone field here," I said with a laugh, kissing Troy softly before stepping back. "Did you see where Taylor went to?"

"Basement, I think," Ryan replied.

"Are you doing okay?" I asked him, and he smiled.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Aunt Gabi," Moira said, poking her head through the door that led to the basement. "We're watching the tape."

"The tape? What…oh, the tape?" I asked, grinning as I followed her down.

"What tape is this you speak of?" Troy's voice was soon filling the finished basement as he took the steps two at a time. "Oh…God, no, turn this off." We laughed as he realized we were watching the compilation tape that Moira had made of Troy's career.

"See this?" I pointed at the screen, during his infamous 'Yes' answer. "That's how I knew it was you on the phone."

"Oh, is that why you dumped your purse?" Sharpay asked with a giggle, and I nodded.

"She didn't even tell us it was you." Taylor was sitting in her big black rocker/recliner chair rubbing her slightly bulging tummy.

"Why the hell not?" he asked, turning towards me.

"To keep you all to myself, duh," I quipped, one swat on his butt as I passed him. He grabbed my arms and pulled me to him, and as he pressed himself up against my back I could feel my body start to sway.

"As soon as we're home," he whispered just as Taylor was saying something else that I completely missed.

"Promise?" I whispered back, feeling him smile against my neck.

"Helloooooo, are you two still with us?" Taylor asked.

"Hmmm?" was all I could say.

"Mom was talking about all I had to hear was, like, two seconds of him talking to know who it was," Moira caught us up.

"Oh, that," I said with a smile. "Yeah, that's another one they wont let me live down."

"And yet you're standing there with a smile on your face." It was Kelsi who made the comment from her place on the couch that Ryan was walking towards. I shrugged.

"I'm… happy."

Wow, what an admission. What a lift off my shoulders that I so didn't know was there. I was absolutely, unequivocally happy. Although I missed my parents sometimes more than words could explain, the rest of my life had piece-by-piece fallen into place. I was mending fences with at least Lisa so my family ties were no longer severed; my friends were healthy, happy, thriving; the man I had dreamed of, longed for, cried over, had his arms around me, and I was full of love for him.

Troy and I stayed longer there than either of us had intended on, or even anticipated. Night had settled in, along with the steady rain that tapped against the windows, its sound hypnotizing as we all gathered in the living room. At this point I couldn't tell you why we were all up there rather than in the basement, but there we all were. Troy and I were sitting next to each other on the floor, positioned so that I was in his arms, his back leaning up against one of the speakers. He reached over with one hand, his long fingers entwining with mine, his eyes watching our hands, a smile softening his features. He glanced over and caught me watching him, my whole body reacting as he bit his bottom lip just before he kissed me.

"I love you," I whispered as he kissed the tip of my nose.

"Are you ready?" he whispered back.

"I'm always ready for you." His eyes slid shut at my admission, and when he opened them again the sheer heat from his gaze was nearly tangible. "Are you ready?" I asked. I couldn't quite comprehend where this sweet smile came from that crossed his face right at that moment.

"Yes," he said. "Yes…yes, I'm ready. Let's get the hell out of here."

I hugged each of my friends just a little tighter that night as we said goodbye; my appreciation for life, and those precious to me, had grown in leaps and bounds over the past few months. "Taylor, are you sure you're okay?" I asked her. She was the last one I was saying goodbye to, and we were standing by the front door.

"I'm wonderful," she replied. "And it looks like you are, too."

"Pretty damn close." I hugged her tight.

"No matter what, you better promise you'll be here when this baby's born."

"I haven't missed any of them," I said, pulling back. "Why would you say that?"

"Just call it a… hunch."

"You and your damn hunches." Her eyebrow raised slightly, and I recalled how each of her hunches had come true. "Hunch about what, anyhow?"

"Ryan said he'll give us a shout tomorrow, we'll 'do lunch' or whatever before he goes back," Troy said as he walked up to us. "And you, gorgeous," He gave Taylor a kiss on the cheek. "If you need anything you let us know."

"Absolutely," she agreed, smiling at him. "Right now I need you to take care of her."

"Consider it done." He put his arm around me and pulled me close as he opened the door. "We'll see each other soon."

"Yeah, we'll… 'do lunch', or whatever," I said with a smile, walking out into the soft drizzle listening to Taylor's laughter as she shut the door behind us. Troy stepped slightly ahead of me, taking me by the hand and guiding me around the parked cars and puddles of water to where we'd parked on the street. "Do you want me to drive?"

"Nah, I got this." He opened my door for me, waiting until I was comfortably seated before shutting it.

"You're spoiling me, you know," I said as he settled into the driver's seat. "What am I going to do when you go back?" He glanced over at me, his face serious, silent. Instead of answering he drove us back to my apartment complex with only the soft music playing. I kept my eyes on him, my body reacting to every slight movement he made. What was it that was so damn sexy about how he drove? His hands, those long fingers lightly pressed against the leather, relaxing occasionally, his wrists visible from under his leather jacket. Oh… my what those hands did to me, literally as well as figuratively. I bit my lip in anticipation, watching his silhouette as he drove.

He pulled into the parking lot of my apartment, easing the car into my spot by the stone steps that led up to my front door. As if on cue, the skies opened up and the rain cascaded down the windshield. "Well… you afraid of melting?" he asked me, a smirk on his handsome face.

"Not in the least," I replied. One look from him and my breath caught in my throat. "Shall we?"

We opened our doors and stepped out into the downpour, my clothes and hair instantly sticking to my skin. I couldn't remember a time I'd felt more alive as I stretched my arms out and laid my head back, the rain washing down my face.

"What are you doing, Woman?" he asked, walking around to my side of the car, his hair clinging to his face, already soaked from the rain.

"Dance with me!" I held my hand out to him and he took it willingly, gathering me in his arms and twirling me around in the rain. I was laughing, carefree, blissful as we swayed there, oblivious to the cold, the heat from our bodies more intensified with the wet clothing between us. We had danced our way across the parking lot to under the light, laughing and spinning, his hand holding mine as he twirled me around, when he suddenly stopped. I opened my eyes, blinking through the raindrops to see what was wrong, the look on his face making my heart stop.

You know those moments? Those ones I told you about earlier? You know what I'm talking about; one of those moments, good or bad, that you know will stay with you throughout eternity, where you know your life is forever changed. This…this was one of those moments.

He stood there in front of me, his face sobering, rain-streaked, his hair dripping with the rain that was still pouring down all around us. His breathing was becoming more labored, his hands shaky. He opened his mouth and shut it quickly, closing his eyes tight for a brief moment before opening them again.

"Troy…what's…"

"I love you."

Oh. God.

"I love you, Gabi," he said, gently cupping my face with his hands. "I love…everything about you…your eyes, those curls, God…those lips…" I felt them start to tremble as he continued.

"I love how…unpredictable you are, I love how you call me on all my bullshit, I love that… I love that you understood me, that you waited for me…"

"Troy…"

"Gabriella, I love you…above all others." I felt my tears mix with the rain. "I love you as if there was no tomorrow. Gabriella…Christine… I love you…like it's never…" He took a deep breath, his fingers caressing my face. "I love you like it's never going to hurt."

He sealed his confession with the sweetest kiss I'd ever known, our lips parting, the softness, the emotion unmatched. My fingers were buried in his soaking wet hair, the kiss tasted of rain, mint gum, and promise. He stepped back slightly, his breathing ragged, his eyes searing into me.

"Troy…"

"I want to make love to you," he whispered against my lips as he kissed me again softly, then began kissing down my throat.

"Yes…yes. Yes."

"Now."

"Yes…" I moaned, holding him to me as he latched onto that spot where my pulse was hammering. He stepped back then, his hands steadying me slightly before he took my hand and led me up the steps to my front door. His hands were shaking as he used the key, unlocking the door and pushing it forward roughly, dragging me in and pushing me against the wall as he kicked it closed behind us, his mouth on mine before that door clicked shut.

"God, Gabi," he moaned between kisses as we moved, peeling each others clothes off as we went. "I…love you…"

"I love you," my reply was half-whimpered as I was making my way backwards up the stairs, his hands all over my near naked body.

"Even with…" He kissed my neck as we approached the bed, "…every time… these past three weeks… that I've watched you fly…" He moaned as I pushed him on the bed, yanking his soaking jeans off, then reached for me, pulling me down beside him on the bed. "All the times… I tasted you…" It was my turn to moan. He had all of my clothes off and was crawling up the bed, between my legs that he had parted easily. "Gabi, I just wanted… to make love…to you…" He was pressed up against me then and we laid there for a moment, both of us knowing our lives would never be the same.

Silently he moved, our eyes and fingers locked as he pressed himself into me slowly, my body adjusting to him, our labored breathing in unison. He let out a soft sigh when he had filled me completely, his smile bright enough to light the darkened room. He leaned down and captured my lips in a kiss as he began to move, slowly at first as we savored each moment, his pace quickening as we lost ourselves in each other. As I felt my release closing in on me, I arched my back, crying out against his lips.

"Open…your eyes." I heard his words and struggled to do so. Oh, it was so…so hard to… "Gabi… baby, please." I opened my eyes just as he reached his own release, the ecstasy etched in his features just before he buried his face in the side of my neck… the moans that tore from his throat as he pushed hard, holding me to him as he stayed there… it was the most intense experience I had ever been a part of. And as he whispered in my ear how much he loved me, over and over as we drifted to blissful slumber, I knew I'd never have to wonder, never have to go a day without hearing those words again.


	49. Chapter 48

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

CHAPTER FOURTY-EIGHT

The large manila envelope sat on my dining room table, opened, contents spread out for inspection. I had received the envelope two months after that wonderful night, the same day that Troy returned for a short visit while he took a break from recording. We'd spent just under four weeks apart… four sleepless, miserable, lonely, longing weeks… and didn't even make it up the stairs when he'd walked through that door. I had pulled an oversized t-shirt and a pair of panties on afterwards, picking up the discarded clothes to place them in the laundry. Troy was standing at my dining room table wearing his boxer briefs and pulling on a white button up shirt when he saw the papers.

"What's…this, Gabi?" he asked, giving them a once-over before turning to me, looking so damn sexy buttoning his shirt that I completely missed his question.

"Hmm?" I asked when he waved his hand to pull me out of my daze.

"This…these papers." He picked one up slightly, placing it back down, a frown crossing his face.

"It's a copy of the new lease," I said, knowing I wouldn't have lied to him anyhow.

"Yeah, I see that now."

Troy and I had many long talks when he'd stayed with me, about how wonderful it had been for us to have all that time together. He'd even stayed after I went back to work, helping out around the house…well, in his own way. As much as I love him, he's definitely not a neat freak. He would listen to my rants and raves about work, I'd listen to the beautiful music he was creating. When that dreaded call came and it was time for him to go, it was devastating. By the time he was walking out the door I was an absolute mess, and he wasn't much better. I was still taking intermittent gasps for air from crying so hard when he slammed the door and had begged me to go with him.

I couldn't.

I had obligations. I had my job, they were short-staffed as it was; my mother's estate was coming out of probate and many of her belongings had been left to me; Lisa and her husband had separated, and even with Troy there I'd done everything I could for her and didn't want to leave her at Shelly and Tracey's mercy; Taylor was still having a difficult pregnancy, and I had promised I'd be there for her at the drop of a hat if she needed me.

I just… couldn't.

The timing sucked.

We promised each other that when he came back on this break that we would talk about it, and I wasn't breaking my promise to him. The fact still remained that my lease was up for renewal, and crunch time was coming fast. So, the papers sat on my dining room table, places highlighted that I needed to pay closer attention to, and a short note beside them with Troy's arrival information.

"Troy…"

"We were ordering in, right?" he asked, turning away from the table, tousling his hair.

"Yes… did you want Chinese or pizza? Or, if you want, I could cook something." He shrugged in response, walking back into the living room and sitting on the far end of the couch. I watched as he silently, sullenly picked up the remote and turned on the TV, only a trace of a smile when he realized the channel was still on TV Land before he was frowning again. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine."

Have I mentioned that no one on this Earth sulks or seethes with anger the way this man does? The fucker even has the audacity to look sexy when he does either one of them.

"Alright, but this means you're at my mercy."

No response from him as I ordered the pizza, possibly because I was being nice and got the kind he liked, without even having to ask what it was. I pulled a couple of beers out of the fridge, opening them up and walking out to the living room. I handed him his and he took it without a thank you or even a glance, drinking a good third of it in one gulp.

"Are you angry with me?"

He sighed. Well, at least that was somewhat of a response.

"Troy, I asked…"

"No, I'm not…" His hands gestured as he continued, "…angry. I'm not angry."

"Then what's wrong?"

He looked over at me. "Gabi, what the hell have we been talking about every chance we get?"

"About us… about me moving out there."

"Right. To be with me." He pointed at the table. "So what the hell is that?"

"It's an unsigned lease."

"For here, this…" There his hands went again. "This apartment, across the entire fucking country…don't give me that look! Almost then, okay? Almost across the entire fucking country."

"We never came to any decisions."

"No, you never came to any decisions. You couldn't decide, Gabi. You."

"So on a whim, because all of a sudden you decide it's what we should do, I should drop everything?" I asked, my temper slowly rising to the surface. "We don't even know if…"

"What the hell do you think we were doing before?" he asked, his voice rising slightly. "What, because I didn't put in a change of address we weren't cohabitating? That's nice to know, Gabi, because I felt…"

He stopped suddenly, as he always did before saying something he thought he would regret. Beer still in hand he stood up and started pacing, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his free hand. "It's funny," he continued. "I remember this one conversation we had, when you told me that when it was time for me to leave, you'd beg me to stay."

"I don't have the right to," I said softly. He stopped and looked at me then; no tears, but the hurt displayed all over his face.

"So…I don't… have the right to ask you to come with me, then? Is that what you're saying?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying."

"Then what is it?" he asked. "Is it… Lisa, or…or Taylor? Gabi, last time I checked they were adults, and they would be okay if you weren't here. I mean…shit, how many brothers and sisters do you have? And what about Kelsi, or… or Sharpay? Can't Taylor call on them?"

"Troy, that's not fair."

"Or is it the hospital? You're still working in the cardiac wing, aren't you?"

"Yes I am, you know I am."

"So what did they do all that time that you were out due to the accident?" Since I had no reply for that one, he continued, this time kneeling right in front of me. "Your parents are right here," he placed his hand over my beating heart. "Everyone else is just a phone call, or a plane ride, away."

"Troy…"

"How have you been these last few weeks?" he asked suddenly, taking my hands in his, those eyes a deep blue as his gaze held me captive.

"Miserable," I replied softly. His features softened slightly at my admission, but he had to already know that.

"I love you, Gabriella," he said, for about the thousandth time since he'd walked through my door an hour before. He smiled softly as his fingertips traced the outline of my lips. "So you can tell me I'm absolutely crazy," he continued, mirroring his words from that long ago message on my machine, "and I can say no…I'm just crazy about you."

"You don't fight fair."

His smile widened.

"Good," he said, standing up and finishing his beer. "Geez, woman, I realize you're a nurse and all, but the beer? Come on."

I know he wasn't in near as good of a mood as he was pretending, perhaps for my sake, to be. He pulled on a pair of pants as the pizza delivery person knocked on our door, and since I was still only in a t-shirt and panties Troy was nice enough to answer and pay…and throw in an autograph, of course. "Babe, your cover's blown. I didn't tell him not to say anything." Troy smiled at me as he brought in our dinner.

"My cover? What about yours?" He shrugged.

"I'm used to it. Scoot over, gimme the remote."

"Scoot…over…give you the remote? What the hell? I haven't said yes yet."

"Yet?" he asked, nudging me gently as he sat down, reaching over and prying the remote from my hand.

"Convince me," I said half jokingly. He sat there looking at me, his eyebrows doing that furrowing together that just drives me to the brink of insanity.

"Okay." The word was soft, but spoken in a way that caused a knot in my stomach. He set his plate and the remote on the table and walked over to his bag.

"What are you doing?" I asked with a giggle, almost expecting him to have some sort gag gift in there, something that I would find insanely funny to help laugh away all the tears I'd cried the entire time he'd been gone. Imagine my surprise when he pulled out a small wire bound notebook. Just as I was about to ask him what the hell he was doing bringing it back into my house, I realized this one was… different. Newer. Still beat up, but… but this one wasn't the same notebook I had flipped through looking for even the slightest mention of my name.

He sat beside me, staring at that book for a long while. "I took this with me, out on the road," he said softly, still staring at it. "It was where I kept… everything; my thoughts, some lyrics… anything that caught my attention that I thought I should store for later. That's what it was supposed to be for, anyhow, and it's not that…"

He sighed, glancing over at me, and when our eyes met he didn't look away. "I had one of these before, one that I wrote in during those lovely teenage angst-filled years." He flashed that half smile. "You knew that, though." One brief pause before he asked, "Jess told me you knew what was in it." For once my face didn't flair at the mention of her name. "I never did tell you why you weren't mentioned, did I?"

"No, you didn't."

"It would have been…awkward at best," he said softly, watching his fingers trace the outline of the notebook in his hand. "I was writing that whole notebook for her, to show her how everything I did, everything I said was about her." His fingers stopped and he looked at me. "But this… us… it wasn't about her. At all." He reached over pushing a stray curl out of my eyes.

"I was honest with you, Gabi. Completely honest with you. No, don't… don't feel guilty about all that shit, I understand," he stopped me from interrupting him. "Just… I'm just trying to, I don't know… explain. For the first time that I could remember, it… God, Gabi, it had nothing to do with Jess. It had to do with you. I wasn't with her at the time and…" He paused, biting his bottom lip slightly before continuing. "And when I was with you, I didn't want to be… with her." The corner of his mouth turned up in a smile and he shrugged. "That's it. Pretty simple, no big drama, no conspiracy."

"I never said there was, Dork," I replied, nudging him softly. "But what's… what's that?" I pointed at the notebook in his hand.

"This is mine," he said, still smiling. "So it wasn't written… to you." He gently placed it on my lap. "If you would like."

I curled up next to him on that couch and spent the next two hours asking him to hand me yet another tissue as I read. I had my head on his chest listening to the soothing rhythm of his heart when I reached the day after we had come face-to-face, the day after we had destroyed that hotel room. The first line ripped my fucking heart out.  
_  
'What have I done?'_

Instead of an entry where he wished he'd never laid eyes or hands on me, here he was pouring his heart out to a sheet of paper. He wished he'd made me stay. He wanted to believe that I didn't get the messages. He had been so afraid of rejection… rejection?!… that he didn't want to repeat what his messages had said. His heart… his heart was breaking, and he didn't know how to fix it. He wanted to call but was afraid to. God… Everything… everything I had been feeling, the days of just going through the motions…

I read about how he'd move Heaven and Earth to be there after my mother died… and he had.

I read about… God, I read about how Jess had finally gotten in touch with him.

I read about his struggles to get to Vegas, actually laughing at his list of people that needed to die.

I read about…after…  
How one day, shortly before we started talking again, he'd had lunch with Jess. How it was so hard for him to explain, how he didn't think she'd understand that he couldn't go back, he couldn't be with her…

Not when his heart belonged to me.

I couldn't finish, I couldn't read another line I was so emotionally drained. Troy hadn't said a word while I read; I'm not even sure he was watching me since he'd found a rerun of Family Jewels. He was softly playing with my curls and staring at the television when I put the journal down.

"Troy…"

"You're right, Gabi, it is completely selfish of me to just expect you to walk away from your life."

I wasn't expecting that.

With me stunned silent, he was able to continue without interruption. "This is your home, your life, your friends, your family. You wouldn't ask that of me and… it was presumptuous of me to think you'd be okay with just…" His voice trailed, his sentence unfinished as he stared at the TV screen.

"I'm sorry I made you angry," I said softly, my voice sounding odd due to my persistent crying.

"I wasn't angry, Gabi," he disagreed and kissed the top of my head.

"Then what were you?" I asked. He waited a moment before answering.

"Hurt."

I sat up slightly, reaching over and turning his face towards mine. "Hurt?"

"I thought you were running, or pushing me away, or…"

"I'm not, I swear I'm not."

"It's okay, Gabi." He smiled softly. "As long as you tell me we'll still have… this… it's okay."

"Why would you think that…" My tears started again and he gathered me up to him, my head once again resting against his chest.

"No more tears, please," he whispered, rocking me gently. "You're breaking my heart, Gabi."

"No…no, it's not like that."

"Let's…we'll… talk about it tomorrow, okay?" he asked. "Different day, different perspective. Deal?"

"Deal." I said, wiping my tears away. "Troy?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

We sat there curled up together in silence, flipping through different channels after that show was done, both of us deep in thought. God, was he right? Was I running? Was I pushing him away? And… what about all the things he had said? Were they just excuses I was making up to keep this distance?

Could I stand another four… possibly even more… weeks without… this? Without his arms around me? Would I be content with his voice on the telephone?

The clock on the wall read a resounding 12:01 am when I glanced at it.

It was officially… tomorrow.

"Troy?" I felt him jump slightly at the sound of my voice, we had been silent for so long.

"Yeah?"

"Could you make sure we're here when Taylor's baby's born?"

His arms tightened slightly around me as he took in a shaky breath. "Of course," he replied.

"I'll still get the right side of the bed?"

"Unless you're on top of me."

"Will you start putting that damn cap back on the toothpaste?"

"I don't know about that, Woman," he drew out his words. "I am the king of my castle, you know."

"Oh, whatever."

"Whatever?" He pulled back, looking down into my eyes. "Whatever? I won't tolerate such insolence from you."

"You and your fucking ten dollar words," I said with a roll of my eyes as I stood up. "Is that supposed to impress me?"

"It does impress you," he said matter-of-factly, following me as I headed towards the stairs. "You love a man who uses his brain. You find it…" He bounded quickly up the stairs behind me, his breath hot in my ear, "…sexy."

I shivered in spite of myself and he laughed before hooking one arm around me and carrying me up the rest of the stairs to the bedroom. "You… are taking entirely too long, Woman," he said as he placed me on the floor by the bed. "Take your damn clothes off."

"Take my… listen here, Bolton,"

"Mmmm, I love it when you talk to me that way," he teased, his hands under my shirt rubbing against my bare skin.

"Troy!" I said with a giggle. "Oh…" The last word was a breathless sigh as he began teasing my neck with his teeth and tongue.

"Damnit, Gabriella, you've got to stop doing that to me," he breathed in my ear.

"Not on your fucking life."

He cradled my face in his hands, his eyes serious once more.

"I love you, Gabriella."

I knew, beyond a shadow of any doubt, that was all I needed.


	50. Epilogue

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING.**

**So here it is...I can't believe this is over. I'm not sure if I am doing a sequel or not. I have had mixed opinions when the reviews have come in. I have some ideas for a sequel and I was thinking of writing it during the time period that happens between the last chapter and the epilogue. Let me know what you think. Please review!!!!**

**EPILOGUE**

"Jeez, Moira, you act like you've never seen a baby before," Taylor was teasing her.

"I can't help it, she's so cute!"

"Did you see those little toes?" Sharpay asked.

"What do you mean little? This child has monkey toes!" Kelsi exclaimed, leaning down and kissing the baby's head. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Hey…guys?" Troy's voice filled the room, and he was immediately verbally assaulted, the loud voices causing the baby to start fussing.

"Dude, out!" Taylor had moved to where she could see him, he was still around the corner from me.

"What the hell! You know better!" Kelsi yelled, and I could see her put her arms out as if she was pushing someone.

"My eyes are covered! I see no nakedness!" Troy defended himself.

"No one's naked in here, Dork," I said.

"Damn."

"That doesn't mean you can come in here!" Sharpay squeaked.

"Well, quit hogging my daughter then!"

Our tiny four-month-old daughter was fussing in Moira's arms, her little hands balled into fists as she waved her arms above her. Kelsi took her out of Moira's arms, who pouted, "I'm not hogging her."

"More people arrived?" I asked, still around the corner, unseen by Troy.

"Yeah, Mom just got here…hi, baby girl…" I heard his voice soften as Kelsi must have handed our daughter to him, and my heart swelled.

"Don't be gone too long, she'll need to eat before I get poured into this dress."

"And no bringing her back in here yourself!" I heard Lisa snap at him as she walked in. "Just have your mother bring her in."

"Quit your bitchin," Troy was muttering as his voice faded away. Lisa was still smiling when she walked around the corner.

"Jeff and Eric's boutonnieres are in place, and they're both ready," she said, then stopped short as she looked at me. Taylor was still working on my curls, but my makeup was already done.

"So they're still willing to do this?" I asked.

"Well, Eric's already a blubbering mess…"

"He's such a wuss," I heard Taylor say as she was finishing my hair.

"But they're both all for this," Lisa continued. "One on each side of you."

I couldn't help but smile.

"Everything's ready," Kelsi said as she walked up to me. "Tracey and Shelly are here. Don't worry, as soon as they saw the baby they made a beeline for her."

"With all those rock stars out there, I think they'll be more interested in flirting than traumatizing you." Lisa said.

Kelsi nodded in agreement. "And security is working double time today."

"Man," Sharpay spoke up, "you know it's love when he agreed to have the wedding here."

We were back in New Mexico, in the suburbs of Albuquerque. This was the same church my parents had married in. The pastor officiating was the son of the man who had performed my parents' wedding, and the members of the church had unanimously agreed to allow us to hold it there.

"Knock knock," Lucille's soft voice filled the room, followed quickly by the baby's cry. "I think my granddaughter's hungry, and last I checked no one out there can feed her."

"Okay, Lady, other than your dress, you're ready," Taylor's words barely registered as Lucille gently placed the baby in my arms.

"Can you give us a moment?" I asked everyone, and they all knew what I meant. I'd asked for this—to be ready, minus the dress, a little early so I could have a moment's peace with my little girl.

I sat on the couch in that dressing room cradling her as she ate, staring in wonder at the miracle in my arms. Her hair was a soft blonde—Lucille said Troy's hair had been blonde also—and the light fuzz was sticking up around her headband. I laughed softly, recalling Troy and Ryan's discussion about 'brain squeezers' as they called them. As I laughed, she opened those beautiful eyes. They were the shape of Troy's and the color of mine. Every time she laid those eyes on her Daddy, her face would fill with joy, and her lips—those perfect lips, the carbon copy of Troy's—would curl up in a smile.

"Well, this is it, baby girl," I said softly. "We made it, we're doing it. Today…today, your Mommy and Daddy are getting married." I blinked back the tears that threatened. "And Mommy can't cry because Taylor will kill me for ruining my makeup." I paused, looking at that precious face.

"I still can't believe this is happening, like it's some kind of… dream. Married. Not to say we haven't tried getting married before, but that's another story for some other time."

I continued talking to her in hushed soothing tones as she ate, stopping as she needed to, having her switch sides midway through. She was dozing intermittently towards the end, and when she was finally finished, I laid her down beside me as I fixed my nursing bra.

A soft knock sounded at the door just before Jessica Carter entered. "Hi!" she said with her warm smile. "Is she about ready?"

"She's done," I replied, smiling down at my daughter's sleeping form.

"She's getting so big!" Jess exclaimed, gently scooping the baby into her arms.

"Thanks for doing this," I said as I glanced at the clock.

"For what, holding her during the ceremony? Yeah, that's such a chore," Jess teased.

"I'm just still so… you know, I don't want her passed around, or people getting annoyed with her, and I don't think…" I paused as I unzipped the bag containing my dress, "…that it would be prudent for me to be holding her while I'm up there."

"Gabi, it's an honor," she said, still smiling down at the baby. "I'll let the girls know you're ready for the dress."

"The dress," I muttered. "What the hell, I hate long dresses! And now I have one that requires…help to get in."

"I could always go pick you up some little black number."

"Ha ha, very funny."

Jess was laughing as she gave me a one-armed hug. "Thank you, Gabi," she whispered in my ear.

"For what?" I asked, watching her walk towards the door. She turned around and flashed her brilliant smile.

"For proving me wrong."

One thirty in the afternoon—to start on the upswing—I stepped out into the hallway to greet my brothers. There they both stood in black tuxes; Jeff, the mean cuss that was barely taller than me next to Eric, the giant teddy bear. I stepped between them, hooking arms, holding onto each of them for support.

"If you start skipping and singing about some damn wizard, I'm kicking your ass," I heard Jeff mumble, and I laughed, grateful for the ease in tension.

I spied Jackie checking the hallways before he re-entered the auditorium portion, and when his eyes met mine, the big burly man broke into a fatherly smile.

"It's about damn time," he whispered as my brothers and I approached the doorway.

I knew exactly what he meant.

I closed my eyes hearing the wedding march start, praying I had the strength to do this without falling apart. Since walking actually required having my eyes open to do so without falling on my face, I slowly opened the lids, drinking in the sight of what had to be a dream.

The room had been transformed into a sea of white, candles and lilies everywhere. The soft smells calmed my fraying nerves as my eyes scanned over the crowd. For merely close friends and family, the church was absolutely packed. I saw all three of my sisters sitting together with their spouses, including Mark who was still trying to reconcile with Lisa. Sharon and her husband were there, sitting right behind the newly-engaged Sharpay and Craig. Speaking of Craig…Dr. John Craig was there also with his very young, very pregnant wife. I smiled at Taylor, who had been trying to see if I'd cried my makeup off. Kiera was on Chad's lap with Moira beside him holding her two year old brother, Aiden.

Across the way, Jessica held my daughter safe in her arms, Troy Burke beside her. Troy Burke…now that's a man who knows a thing or twelve about persistence…

All of my and Troy's immediate family was there, including both of his parents, their spouses, and all of his siblings. Ryan was standing beside Troy, winking sideways at Kelsi, my maid of honor, who was blushing ever so slightly.

And Troy… God help me, my knees got weak when I saw him. He was dressed all in white, his hair perfectly disheveled, just a hint of stubble on his face—he'd actually done what I asked!—and his eyes…the most beautiful eyes, the same eyes that had haunted me for years, were calling me home.

At the exact moment that I wished my parents were there, a small stream of sunlight peered through the single window near the ceiling, shining down next to Troy where I would soon stand. "Show offs," I whispered to the sky just as I began my journey down that aisle.

Lisa's backyard looked like a scene straight out a storybook. White twinkling lights cascaded around, the warm glowing light illuminating all of our guests. The soft breeze carried the scent of the dozens of lilies that were placed on every table, and a collective "awwww" had gone through the crowd when Troy picked one and placed it in my hair, tucking the shortened stem behind my ear just before our first dance as husband and wife. Much champagne was flowing, although I didn't touch a bit of it, so I was handed a glass of sparkling cider as Ryan stood.

"A toast!" he exclaimed, raising his glass. "Not to worry; I'm not as hateful during these as some people," he added, winking at me.

"At least you know who's gotten married!" Troy Burke piped up, and all of us that knew the story shared a good laugh.

"But seriously," Ryan continued, "even though meeting Gabriella also meant meeting Kelsi, which put me in Albuquerque where my ass was nearly annihilated…" Again with the laughs as Kelsi cozied up to him, softly kissing the scar on his neck. "Oh, hell, what was I saying?"

"Annihilation!" someone called out.

"Annihilation, right… um… well, shi…er, crap, sorry Mom." He grinned sheepishly at Lucille, who merely smiled and shook her head. After the laughter had died down a bit, Ryan continued.

"Troy, my brother… I've known you since I was born. You have tormented me, tortured me, taught me all of your bad habits… came into my room to tell me I had to do your chores and walk out scratching your butt…"

"I knew he'd throw that in," Troy whispered.

"You became Mr. Moody Rock Star, calling me at all hours of the night, guilting me if I couldn't stay on the phone…"

"He's the king of the guilt trip!" Jason called out, and Troy raised his hand as if to accept his crown.

"And then, nothing. No calls. It's like I…" Ryan mock-wiped his eyes. "It's like I didn't exist anymore. No, seriously, he started stalking some chick he didn't even know, and the next thing he takes my ass out and gets me in trouble for dancing on a bar…I cussed, didn't I? Fuck..shit… sorry Mom." My cheeks hurt from smiling already, but I couldn't stop the laugh that came from me.

"And now… um… ah… Phoenix. Phoenix, the city that rocks, the city where my brother lost his heart… to you." Ryan held his glass out to me. "And I had to hear about it for fucking ever until he had the guts to tell you… shit!"

"Sorry, Mom, yeah yeah I know," Lucille quipped above all the laughter. Ryan hid his face as he tried to retain control over his obvious case of the man-giggles, then he crooked his neck and straightened his tie.

"So, for real…" Ryan wiped a stray tear. "A toast! To Troy and Gabriella…"

"And to Body English!" another heckler called.

"That little black dress!"

"Advil and Diet Pepsi!" Sharon added.

"Hell, Advil and Gatorade! Woo hoo Girls Night!" Sharpay exclaimed, to which there was scattered applause from the women, myself included.

"To Family Jewels!"

"Easy on my family jewels there," Troy shouted back, his arm tightening slightly around me.

"To Not John and Not Telling!" Moira chimed in.

"To wrong numbers!" Dr. John Craig shouted from the back, his glass of champagne raised, causing the crowd to erupt in laughter and applause.

"Amen to that," Troy whispered softly in my ear.

"Hell yeah! To … to wrong numbers!" Ryan finished at last, "and how they've blessed us all." He held out his glass towards us. "Salute!"

After taking a drink from our glasses, Troy took mine from my hand and placed it on the nearest table. He cradled my face in his hands, his eyes changing to the most beautiful shade of blue, full of promise. "I love you, Gabriella Bolton," he whispered just before he covered my lips with his, giving the crowd what they were cheering for, leaving me absolutely breathless.

The reception was still in full swing as I changed into dark clothing. I had just fed the baby and she was laid back on the bed of the room I had once stayed in, her legs kicking, her eyes wide. I heard the door open, the noise filtering in as Troy entered the room. "What are you doing?" he asked, eyeing me warily.

"Trust me?" I asked, placing a soft kiss on his lips. "I just have to do this one thing."

"Do you think you can actually get out of here?" he asked, knowing the paparazzi had most of the neighborhood staked out.

"Yeah, I think so," I said, slipping my dark shoes on.

Troy was smiling softly down at our beautiful little girl, who let out a tiny squeak when he came into view. "Hello, baby girl," he crooned to her as he always did. The contrast of such a tiny child being held in his big strong hands always fascinated me. "I'm so happy you're here," he continued talking to her as he cradled her close to him. "I'm happy…and I'm grateful that you're okay… that everything…" he continued, looking up at me, "is okay."

"I think someone was looking out," I said softly, closing the small distance between us, putting my arms around Troy.

"And you have her all dressed in black, too?"

"She'd glow in white," I pointed out.

"Dun dun dunnnnn… stealth baby." I had to laugh as he bounced her, a small squeak coming from her as he did his faces and voices that always kept her amused. "So you're taking her?"

"Of course," I replied. "We'll be back."

He helped us make our escape to the neighbor's house, out their back door, through their yard across to the next street over where Sharpay's vehicle sat, a car seat strapped in and ready. Once the baby and I were secure, we were on our way, winding through the streets to the open road I knew so well.

I had to park further away than usual, but walking onto the grounds wasn't difficult at all. I held my daughter close to me, wishing I'd brought a blanket as the night air was starting to get cool. As I walked up the hill and followed the path, I could almost feel them with me, watching me.

"Hi Mom, Hi Dad," I said, kissing their headstone as I sat in the grass that was moist with dew. "I'm sorry it's been so long… but guess what! Since you cannot guess I will tell you. Today was my wedding. Yep, we did it… Troy and I were married today. Same church as you. Oh, and I brought you a surprise visitor." I kissed my daughter on the cheek and she nestled into me.

"This is your granddaughter," I continued. "Elizabeth Christine Bolton. Troy named her even… after you, Mom," I said, smiling at their headstone, tears touching my eyes when it hit me just how much I wished they could be there. Elizabeth fussed slightly when one of my tears fell on her. "I'm sorry, baby girl," I whispered as I held her closer. My phone began buzzing in my pocket, and seeing the number I answered.

"What's wrong?" How could he tell, just like that?

"I'm… just…" I shrugged.

"I know, I know. Hey… do me a favor."

"What's that?"

"Cross your arms," he said softly. I snuggled our daughter into me, crossing my arms just as he said, my heart overflowing.

"Done."

"Now squeeze… not too tight, baby girl needs to breathe." I almost laughed at his last statement, but I did as he asked. "Did you do it?"

"Yes," I breathed.

"That's a hug—for my girls, from me."

"Troy…"

"But that's not enough anymore."

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Turn around."

I turned slightly and saw that familiar figure coming towards us, all dressed in black now and clicking his phone shut. The only light colored object besides his skin was the soft fuzzy blanket he carried on his arm. "I couldn't leave my girls all alone like this tonight," he said as I silently watched him through my tears. He sat down beside me taking Elizabeth from my arms and holding her up against him, her favorite blanket draped over her.

"Thank you," I whispered. "For… everything." He kissed me in response, soft and sweet.

"I could say the same to you." He smiled down at me "So, did you tell your Dad I finally made an honest woman out of ya?"

"Of course."

"Guess that means you can't lie to me any damn more," he said with a wink, stretching out and laying his head on my lap, our daughter lying on top of him, pushing herself up with her arms.

"Funny, Bolton, real funny. No more… omissions from you, then."

"Whatever, woman. I'm the king of the castle, lest you forget."

"You, sir, officially made me your queen," I reminded him.

"Oh, hell, what have I got myself into? Huh, baby girl? What did Daddy get himself into?" She smiled and kicked, her drool making a puddle on his shirt. "Great, my wedding night and the only puddle is from baby drool."

"The night's not over yet, sir," I said, running my fingers through his hair.

"Really? Cause last time I checked we were sitting at your parents grave and… who the hell is calling you?" I pulled my phone out of my pocket and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Chrissie?" the male voice on the other end of the phone asked.

"No, I'm sorry, you have the wrong number," I said, and after polite good byes I hung up. "Anyhow… where were we?"

"Um…" He pointed at the gravestone. "Parents. Grave. Drooling baby. Wedding night." He scowled. "And your phone…again."

"Sorry," I whispered, answering it again.

"Chrissie?" It was the same man.

"No, this isn't. You dialed the same number."

"Well then…who are you?" the man asked.

I felt Troy's fingers warm against my hand as he gently took the phone from me and put the receiver up to his ear. "Dude…dude, you got the wrong number. Nope…nope, just… rip it to shreds, don't call it again, 'kay? Sure thing." I stifled a giggle as he closed my phone, handing it back to me.

"Troy…"

"Nah, that's my gig. No more wrong numbers for you, Not Telling."

"Same goes for you, Not John." He smiled up at me. "And… where were we again?"

"Shesh, Woman, pay attention! Parents, grave, drooling baby, wedding night."

"Got it," I said.

"Hey, Gabi?"

"Hmmm?"

I watched Troy as he slowly sat up, still hugging Elizabeth against his chest. He pulled her close to him with his left hand, and I couldn't help but grin as our little girl wrapped her small arms around Troy's neck, cooing in his embrace. Troy looked back at me, his lips breaking into a smile. Gently he reached out, his warm hand cradling my face, and my eyes fluttered close, the wind blowing through the silence. His smile, those eyes, his hands securely around our baby girl-- I knew then that all of it in this moment will forever be engraved in my mind. I felt the touch of his lips on mine that brought a shiver all the way to my toes, and I inched closer with eyes closed, returning his kiss.

After a moment, he pulled back.

"Gabi..."

"Hmm?"

"Open your eyes," he murmured against my lips, and I did.

I met his intense gaze, staring into the same beautiful eyes that first drew me to him when we met years ago, losing myself as they pulled me towards him now. God, who knew we'd end up here?

"What is it, Troy?"

"I'm really glad I called you," he whispered before pulling me in for another kiss. For a moment we stayed like that, until Elizabeth suddenly stirred in his arms, and we drew back, laughing softly.

"She's absolutely beautiful, isn't she?" Troy whispered, glancing down as our baby girl wrapped her little hand around one of Troy's finger, and settled back to sleep. He was a great father.

I nodded, my heart swelling as I looked at him. He gave me another one of those beautiful smiles, moving closer towards me--

"Okay," he muttered against my lips, "who the hell is calling you again?"

I couldn't help but laugh at his annoyance, and I grabbed the phone once more, pulling it open. Lisa's voice bellowed on the other line.

"Where the hell are you? This is your reception, woman. You're supposed to be here. You better not be back inside my house, engaging in inappropriate behavior reserved for a hotel suite, Gabi, because I swear, even if it's your wedding night—"

I bit my lip, repressing the urge to smile. Troy raised his eyebrow in question, and after a minute, Lisa muttered a quick goodbye, distracted by one of Troy's single friends. I closed my phone without another word.

"Who was it?"

Troy pulled me to his side with one arm while still cradling our daughter on his left, and placed a kiss on my hair. I looked up at him, our faces inches away.

"Nothing," I whispered softly against his lips before drawing him for one long sweet kiss that made my heart flutter knowing I would always have it…for the rest of my life. "Just a wrong number."


	51. Author's Note UPDATE

Hello to all my devoted readers! I have been so pleased with the response that I received from "Wrong Number", that I have started working on some companion pieces to fill in some gaps to my story. I was a little hesitant to do this because I love how well "Wrong Number" turned out and I wouldn't want to take away from that story. I have taken what you, the readers, have told me and have tried to dive deeper into the story based on these reviews. So thank you for your response! I hope to have the next installment of my story up soon.


	52. Chapter 52

Just wanted to let my readers know that the first chapter of the companion piece of Wrong Number is now up. It's titled Not John. I hope you like it!


	53. Author's Note

Author's Note:

Hey guys...I'm back! I've been working on another installment in the Wrong Number series that fills in the gap between the last chapter and the epilogue. It's call Miracles Happen Once in a While. It's only a one shot, but its posted, so go check it out. Hope you like it!


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